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My Wife Is Obsessed With Dressing Our Little Girl Like A Doll, And Other Family Drama Stories

My Wife Is Obsessed With Dressing Our Little Girl Like A Doll, And Other Family Drama Stories
A husband grieves his long-time wife telling him that he's not in her top five.
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Remember those feel-good movie characters from the aughts who'd one day find a troubled family and teach them how to love again? Well, none of them were available, so I'll have to do.

That's right, I've gathered some of the wildest family drama from across Reddit, and now you're invited to my virtual BBQ to hear it all. From failed family vacations to parents knowing when to cut the leash, I'm still here to ruin everyone's Thanksgiving, even if we're in April.


Our Kid Is Quite Upset After We Forced Her To Dress Up

Trying to navigate a pickle.

My wife is a girly-girl fashionista type. Up until about three years ago, I don't think my wife owned a single pair of pants, much less jeans. Always dresses, skirts, etc. My daughter, up until about a year or two ago, was all about dresses and princesses. But as my daughter started school, my best guess is that she noticed all of the other kids are always in pants/shorts and a T-shirt and my daughter is wanting to wear the same things to fit in.

The issue has come to a head now. We did some family photos this past weekend and we all dressed up. I wore a suit, wife was decked to the nines, and our daughter was asked to put on a dress that was probably a bit much, but I rolled with it since it's family photos and the like. However, our daughter was incredibly upset about it and more or less made the photo process incredibly difficult. Probably because we were taking them at a public park. Waiting on the pictures to determine whether or not the whole thing was 'ruined' or a wash or what have you. I did pull daughter aside during the photo shoot and basically told her to get her act together, we're all dressed up together, etc. When we got home, I told her to eat dinner, wash up and go to bed early.

My wife and daughter are arguing about it. My wife is taking very much a 'you're going to wear this because I told you to' position, and my daughter is struggling with it. I'm caught in the middle because, truth be told, I do think my wife is too much about dresses. There are a few 'normal'-type every day dresses, but many of them are a bit over the top. My wife expects me to provide a united front and so far I've avoided having to contradict her, but in one on one conversations I've told my wife that I think our daughter is old enough to pick out things she wears, and I understand why she's embarrassed to wear big puffy princess dresses.

On the other hand, our seven-year-old is old enough to understand 'I'm dressing up like this for a special occasion, it's temporary and we're all in this together'. At home she was visibly upset and apologized, but I told her that her behavior wasn't acceptable and that she was purposefully difficult, an apology isn't going to fix the issue where we may not have any good photos and are going to have to wait and see how many of the photos have her with a 'sour face.' She ended up going to bed early on her own without dinner.

This morning we found a crumbled up letter she wrote basically saying 'I looked like a princess, I was too pretty, I hated it and I wish I was friend from school.' I don't know the friend reference but I'm going to assume that friend, like every other kid at the school, just wears boring pants and shirts and the like.

I plan on showing our daughter the letter and chatting with her. I will be much more conciliatory and try to reinforce the angle of 'we were all dressing up together for a very good reason,' but I also want to try and talk to her about not using such language when referring to herself, that temporary discomfort comes and goes and shouldn't be something she should take too hard against her self-esteem — but I need to figure out how to let her know that it is okay to be angry and to rationalize her feelings in an appropriate way, like writing them out on a sheet of paper.

I'm also going to talk with my wife again and really lean in on that I think we should reserve dress up for special events, and if we do dress up, that it can include fancy pants and a top — but if it is going to be a dress then I think it should be much more contemporary and less baby doll/princess.

The good news is that the next morning our daughter more or less behaved completely like it was water under the bridge.

Being the mediator is a better way to look at things, rather than viewing yourself as the person stuck in the middle. Kids, especially at 7, can be unrealistic sometimes. I agree with the comments: you need to stand up to your wife on this one — and because you didn't, your little girl had to. She's nowhere close to being an adult yet, and that means she's going to need someone in her corner. Read the rest of the thread here.


I Told My Daughter Her Wedding Sucked, And Now I'm The Villain?

My daughter got married about a year ago. She spent about 20k on her wedding, it was a wonderful experience for her, but for all the guests it really sucked. All the money went to things the couple would enjoy.

The reasons it sucked for the guest was due to multiple factors. The biggest ones being that the guest has to buy food, drinks and there was no entertainment. So people get to the wedding and the ceremony happens. Then they go put into another room after a long day of driving out, don't get any food or drink. Most of them were forced to buy overpriced food since they were starving. They didn't even get any cake since the cake was a fake. Overall not a good guest experience.

Afterwards it was negatively talked about and people were actually quite mad about it. My other daughter is getting married and asked for my help. Her sister offered to help, and my other daughter made it clear she doesn't want her wedding to be anything like hers.

My daughter asked what she meant by that and I was honest with her; that her wedding wasn't a good experience for guests and it is a running joke at this point with family and friends. I thought she already knew since a lot of people hated her wedding.

This caused an argument and she called me a jerk by the end. I pointed out all the issues had with her wedding and she thinks I am being cruel.

Edit: the money basically went to her dress, venue and photos. I know her dress was 6k. The venue was pricey and she didn’t get the food package.

I was not part of the wedding planning, I was having medical issues.

That wedding sounds like the world's worst photo pop-up experience. No food? I cannot imagine being there as a family of five, with three small kids and you need to buy them each a $20 plate, and then ask for fast food on the way home. Your daughter doesn't sound that mad about it, so I'm sure it'll blow over. Read the rest of the thread here.


Childhood Sweetheart, Current Wife, Says I'm Not That Important To Her

My daughter randomly asked my wife who were the five most important people for her. I never ranked people based on how much I love them, but I'm sure that my daughter would be the first, and my wife the second one. However, she said that her top five are our daughter, her mom, her dad, her sister and her aunt.

I asked her what about me, and she said that I would be the sixth along with the cats. We have known each other since we were 15-years-old, we have been dating since we were 22, we have been living together since we were 25, we have been married since we were 27, we had a child when we were 29 and she started working with me when we were 39. We literally shared all the important moments in our life together. How does it make sense? I love my brother and my parents, but how could I love them more than the woman of my life? Does it make sense?

There's a lot of history between you two, literally, for her to view you as just some dude she couldn't care less for. Maybe she was a bit insensitive, could be a symptom of decades you've spent together, and spoke off the top of her mind because she feels comfortable expressing herself candidly. Being a better communicator is definitely up for debate. Read the rest of the thread here.


Read the previous edition here.


[Image credit: James Sutton]

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