A Hustle Culture Bro Says Receiving $50 A Month Is Better Than A Million-Dollar Lump Sum, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'
IT'S A TOMATO, MICHAEL
·Updated:
·

Every day somebody says or does something that earns them the scorn of the internet. Here at Digg, as part of our mission to curate what the internet is talking about right now, we rounded up the main characters on Twitter from this past week and held them accountable for their actions.

This week's characters include a venture capitalist who wants young people to work on the weekends, a hustle culture guy with the worst math, someone with an eye-popping tomato money-making scheme, an NBA legend with the worst playoff strategy, two conservative pundits who opposed the Juneteenth holiday and a highly-paid journalist with a poorly received "deep-dive."

Friday

Jordan Kong

The character: Jordan Kong, venture capitalist at San Francisco firm Atomic.

The plot: On Friday, Kong argued that the best thing young people can do to kick-start their careers is to work on the weekend.

The repercussion: Kong's advice proved to be much more unpopular than she had realized, with many people strongly discouraging people from heeding her words.

Kong's hot take even spurred a meme where people shared other "unpopular" career advice.

After being mercilessly dunked on by the internet, Kong later attempted to explain herself in a thread.

Tuesday

Side Hustle King

The character: Side Hustle King, entrepreneur, self-described hustler, guy who reportedly "helps people make money."

The plot: On Tuesday, the Side Hustle King asked his legion of followers, "Would you rather get paid $1,000,000 right now or $50 every month for the rest of your life?" He proceeded to explain why he would choose $50 per month.

The repercussion: Side Hustle King's enthusiastic endorsement of Option B lit the internet on fire, garnering perplexed responses from investors and netizens who observed his math to be a little, uh, off.

Dishonorable Mention

Reggie Miller

The character: Reggie Miller, five-time NBA All-Star, TNT sports commentator, Michael Jordan's least favorite opponent.

The plot: On Tuesday night, Miller suggested benching the Brooklyn Nets's best players for Game 6.

The repercussion: Miller's suggestion went over like a lead balloon among basketball fans on Twitter, who proceeded to roast the former Indiana Pacers star for his galaxy brain take. Miller's advice was reportedly the "worst ratio that NBA Twitter has seen in 2021."

The Nets ultimately did not try Miller's bewildering suggestion, though they still ended up losing Game 6.

Wednesday

Nick Huber

The character: Nick Huber, startup guy, self-described tomato king.

The plot: As the discourse over the Side Hustle King's hypothetical scenario continued to reverberate throughout the week, Huber added an interesting suggestion: use the money to buy tomato plants.

The repercussion: Huber's tomato-based get-rich-quick scheme went viral, with people characterizing it as either the most hilariously insane suggestion ever or a brilliant piece of capitalist performance art.

Huber later contended his tweet was a joke and that he had "trolled the entire internet."

Thursday (Tie)

Charlie Kirk/Candace Owens

The characters: Charlie Kirk, Turning Point USA founder, fact-challenged pundit / Candace Owens, conservative podcaster, progenitor of ill-advised hot takes.

The plot: On Thursday, Kirk and Owens both slammed the bipartisan legislation making Juneteenth, which commemorates the end of slavery, a federal holiday.

"'Juneteenth' is an affront to the unity of July 4th," Kirk tweeted.

Owens characterized the holiday as "soooo lame" and opined that she'd be celebrating the Fourth of July only.

The repercussion: Kirk and Owens's dismissal of Juneteenth as a national holiday drew mockery across party lines. Several people dug up many of Kirk's old tweets celebrating Republicans for emancipating the slaves and observed that Donald Trump had previously trumpeted his support for it. Justin Amash called out the conservative pundit's hypocrisy, quipping, "Plot twist in the fourth act."

Others pointed out the logical inconsistencies in Owens's anti-Juneteenth argument.

Dishonorable Mention

Felix Salmon

The character: Felix Salmon, chief financial correspondent for Axios; erstwhile highly paid journalist at Fusion, a troubled millennial news site that shuttered.

The plot: On Thursday, Salmon tweeted that he had written a "deep dive" on "America's pandemic of unemployment fraud."

The repercussion: Salmon's tweet and "deep dive," which technically was more like a slideshow, was ratioed into oblivion by media Twitter, who found his so-called exposé on unemployment fraud flimsily sourced. Many of Salmon's former co-workers came out of the woodwork to dunk on him as well.

Salmon stood behind his reporting after being buried in an avalanche of quote-tweets


Read the previous edition of our One Main Character column, which includes a hustle culture guy who doesn't read books, Richard Dawkins's questionable literary criticism and more.

Did we miss a main character from this week? Please send tips to [email protected].

James Crugnale is an associate editor at Digg.com.

Want more stories like this?

Every day we send an email with the top stories from Digg.

Subscribe