The Most Expensive Food You Can Order On GrubHub
It's rainy outside. You can't find your pants. The only thing in the fridge is a jar of olives (do olives go bad? A question for another day). It's the perfect time to pause that video of a cat staring into the abyss and order your food, but what to get? For those of you with too much disposable income and no sense of decency, we've rounded up the most expensive food you can get online for 11 U.S. cities.
New York
Dish: Palladium Ossetra Black Caviar
Price: $275
Restaurant: Mari Vanna
While New York certainly offers a dizzying amount of expensive, absurd dining experiences — at one point there was a $500 burger — the only equivalent delivery option comes from a can. For $275, Russian eatery Mari Vanna will deliver 30 grams of Palladium Ossetra black caviar (for reference, the only caviar that tops Ossetra is Beluga) straight to your doorstep. Oh it also comes with onion, eggs, sour cream and blinis — Russian for pancake.
Los Angeles
Dish: Giant Sicilian 54″ x 54″ Pizza
Price: $199.90
Restaurant: Big Mama's and Papa's
A somewhat local pizza chain to Los Angeles, Big Mama's and Papa's offers your standard pizzeria fare: pizzas, sandwiches, calzones, sides and so on. But give them 24-hours notice, and they'll deliver a 54" by 54" square of sicilian. That's over 20 square-feet of pizza, for $200. Excuse us, we need to sit down — we're thinking about moving to LA.
Chicago
Dish: Mariscada
Price: $122.99
Restaurant: Mariscos el Caribe
A "mariscada" is just what the Portuguese call a seafood platter. And, like others around the world, Chicago's Mariscos el Caribe's features a mountain of crustaceans, bivalves and fish. So, what does $123 worth of seafood get you? According to the menu: "One whole red snapper, one whole tilapia, eight mussels, six shrimp wrapped in bacon, three crab legs, six breaded shrimp, one small chapuzon, one order of camarones cucaracha and six cups of rice."
Philadelphia
Dish: Uzu Ultimate Sashimi
Price: $70.89
Restaurant: Uzu Sushi
Description: For $71 Philadelphia's Uzu Sushi will deliver you 24 pieces of raw fish. That seems reasonable.
Miami
Dish: Shabu Shabu
Price: $70.00
Restaurant: Shokudo
A large part of what makes shabu-shabu great is the spectacle. A large boiling pot of water, a table full of friends and a large platter of meat and vegetables to cook and eat amongst yourselves. Call a day ahead, and Miami's Shokudo will deliver said experience. Given that it's meant to serve two — with sliced rib-eye, a mix of vegetables, and Japanese pickles — it's actually not that bad of a deal. Sure you could just go to Shokudo for the real deal, but they don't have Netflix.
Boston
Dish: Stewed Abalone With Oyster Sauce
Price: $69.69
Restaurant: New Jumbo Seafood
With rampant overfishing and deterioration of their habitat, the abalone is projected to become extinct within the next two centuries. As such, consumption of of the sea snail is strictly controlled in California — where the only way to legally eat the mollusc is to catch it yourself. But not in Boston! Here, at New Jumbo Seafood you can not only order abalone, but even get it delivered! Because that's the best way to enjoy an increasingly rare delicacy: lukewarm and from a take-out container.
Washington D.C.
Dish: Half Rotisserie Glazed Duck
Price: $49.90
Restaurant: Eli's Kosher Grill & Deli
D.C. is a town full of fundraisers, power lunches, and discreet dinner meetings. So it makes sense that the worst you can do in a single go is a $50 rotisserie half-duck. It's hard to gain political clout from your apartment!
San Francisco
Dish: Live Lobster
Price: $45.00
Restaurant: 2G Japanese Brasserie
In a town full of foodies and tech companies, one would assume that the delivery offerings in San Francisco would be absolutely absurd. Nope! The most damage you can do via delivery is $45 live lobster. Though, if you really want to go crazy you could hire a TaskRabbit to secretly bag a meal from Coi.
Denver*
Dish: Vermonster Sundae
Price: $42.95
Restaurant: Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream
Who would have thought the priciest thing you can get delivered in Denver comes from Vermont? We didn't — well at least in terms of food! (We're talking about marijuana. Because it's legal in Colorado. Perhaps you've heard?) Ben & Jerry's Vermonster is 20 scoops of ice cream of whatever flavors you desire with your choosing of sauces and toppings — all plopped into a giant plastic bucket. Maybe if you do some pots you could eat the whole thing yourself! But don't. Brainfreeze while you're high is probably not fun.
Dallas*
Dish: Japanese Cowboy
Price: $40.70
Restaurant: Kenichi
Dallas's Kenichi offers a wide array of sushi and Asian fusion dishes. But this is Dallas, so the most expensive thing you can get delivered is a 16 oz bone-in ribeye.
Austin*
Dish: Lamb Fillet Hot Pot
Price: $39.50
Restaurant: A + A Sichuan Garden
Like Miami's Shokudo, Austin's A + A Sichuan Garden will also deliver you a hot pot. It has lamb fillet. We will probably go the rest out of lives never tasting it, but we assure you it's good.
*Okay, so technically, these aren't the most expensive items on GrubHub in Austin, Dallas and Denver. That honor goes to Italian-themed chain Maggiano's Little Italy and their $45 16-oz sirloin. But for the sake of mixing it up, we went with the second-most expensive.
