Sponsored by Travelzoo
Take Advantage of Ridiculously Low Holiday Airfares view!
travelzoo.com - Flights $52 and up for Thanksgiving, Christmas & New Year. But move on it now.
57 Comments
- sundancekid503, on 11/19/2007, -4/+57#6 - They watch you masturbate
- dsendecki, on 11/19/2007, -1/+41It's actually a huge orbiting ceiling cat.
- sundancekid503, on 11/19/2007, -3/+33i can has geostationary orbitz?
- DeathtoG4, on 11/19/2007, -6/+36 2. Tracking cows
Whoever went all the way to "use space technology" to answer the question "What do cows eat?" missed a few simple steps including:
a) Walk over to the cows
b) Look at what the cows are eating
c) Identify this strange green bladed plant that seems to grow everywhere, underneath the sky which is blue. - ChzPlz, on 11/19/2007, -1/+16arse elves?
- inactive, on 11/19/2007, -7/+21They saw me, and disabled that feature.
- rarson, on 11/19/2007, -1/+13"ourselves"
- Amadeus2490, on 11/19/2007, -0/+11Actually, a story was submitted a couple of months ago about bacteria being exposed to radiation from outer space and becoming "super-resistant."
- Veni_Vidi_Vici, on 11/19/2007, -0/+8I laughed when I read about the schoolchildren tracking the turtle. Does that make me a bad person?
- Sinudeity, on 11/19/2007, -1/+9lolsat?
- Bridea, on 11/19/2007, -1/+9are selfs? Not even Babelfish stumbles that badly.
- tendonut, on 11/19/2007, -1/+8But only if I am masturbating on the roof.
- polyGone, on 11/19/2007, -2/+6you two should bang and get it over with......
- doctechnical, on 11/19/2007, -0/+2I remember it was binary...
- nastajus, on 11/19/2007, -1/+3mostly trivial uses. only the "slowing down" and "taking over your car" was the interesting middle-of-article point. but that too in itself made itself unimportant. the article is neat but otherwise not important.
- RogerStrong, on 11/19/2007, -0/+2Well, at least we can rule out a theft by the Republicans....
- keyme, on 11/19/2007, -0/+2#6. Inspiring people to write sarcastic articles and bring them on to the Digg front page.
- inactive, on 11/19/2007, -2/+4Wait I am confused 3 of things were about GPS which I've know about for quite sometime and the other 2 where just ramblings. Sounds like someone has to much time on their hands to write articles or they are a complete nut.
I know one thing that sats do that can help sunkist22 however they can help her tell what time it is. Hopefully she'll read this article so she can discover that. - Sinudeity, on 11/19/2007, -1/+2They saw me masturbating with my bicycle...
And arrested me! - esc27, on 11/20/2007, -0/+12. Tracking cows:
I can't Speak for Yorkshire, but not all pastures are idealistic, green paradises. The real ones I am most familiar with are only traversable by truck, rough, and filled with places cows can hide. Cows like to find secluded, places to give birth, so it can be difficult for a farmer/rancher to locate cows who may have problems with their pregnancy and/or the new calves to check up on and inventory. - zensequential, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1maybe that's what all these superbugs are all about~
- doctechnical, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1More like "The Andromeda Strain", actually.
- zydeco, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1Found it! 1-110-1010. Stupid 1970s phone numbers.
- mattrmcg, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1#1...wasn't that the plot from The Blob (1980s version)?
- tendonut, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1I like turtles.
- zydeco, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1Quick, who remembers the number to start up Wildfire?
- yujie, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1Planning to take over the world
- Bahimiron, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1Isn't that first one kinda like how The Stand started?
- Shambla, on 11/19/2007, -1/+2Right...with the jelly beans and he would turn into a ladder and stuff? Great flick.
- superal1394, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1its aroundthe 20 minute point
- Scynet, on 11/19/2007, -0/+1#8 Satellites suffer from the effects of time-dilation as predicted by the theory of relativity. Since the time for satellites is moving slower than for us from our point of view, the courses have to be adjusted accordingly.
http://www.astronomy.ohio-state.edu/~pogge/Ast162/ ... - SmokeMeAKipper, on 11/19/2007, -1/+2I think Google street view has this covered.
- SmokeMeAKipper, on 11/19/2007, -1/+2That's an Odd Man Hypothesis
- tendonut, on 11/19/2007, -2/+3This is why I spend so much time on Digg
- coldcarbon, on 11/19/2007, -3/+3maybe thats why you don't work for nasa
- doctechnical, on 11/19/2007, -1/+1No worse than I, but that ain't sayin' much.
"Teacher, where's Tommy the Turtle now?"
"Uh, he was just passed by some villagers." - inactive, on 11/19/2007, -1/+1more satellites should be in the hands of ordinary people, at least in the form of distributed shares.
- superal1394, on 11/19/2007, -1/+1Am I the only one that thought of Sheep Herder 3.0 when I read that?
http://revision3.com/diggnation/2005-09-29 - inactive, on 11/19/2007, -2/+1Bah you really are a troll no worth even wasting my time with you anymore .
Only a troll would mutter this phrase "I can drop and recreate Digg accounts with new emails faster than you can type. So see you around moron."
Later troll good luck on figuring out how to read a clock. - inactive, on 11/19/2007, -10/+9Searching for a brain cell among the 2008 DNC candidates?
- gherikill, on 11/19/2007, -2/+11. Creating space plagues
Many astro-boffins are upset that there isn't more money and attention for the space program, but few would go as far as a group of researchers from the Arizona State University who created a super-infectious strain of space bacteria. We can only imagine that the next time they request funding they'll be casually juggling glass vials of the super-space-disease and contemplating how terrible it would be if there was an accident.
The team collaborated with NASA shuttle mission STS-115, soon to be known as "The end of the old ways", conspiring to expose Salmonella microbes to the stresses of space travel "to investigate the effect of space flight on cellular and physiological responses" i.e. to see what happens. Please remember that the last people exposed to space radiation to see what happened developed superpowers and became the Fantastic Four. I might have suggested choosing a Nobel peace prize winner or a firefighter for this experiment, not a disease known for extremely unpleasant days in the bathroom.
Unfortunately I was not on hand to advise/sabotage this shadowy team of superbug makers, and their devilish plot succeeded. The returning microbes are now three times as nasty as their primitive Earth-bound cousins. The scientists responsible continue to act like successfully creating a cosmic gut-plague was a good thing.
2. Tracking cows
The Yorkshire Dales National Park Authority will use Global Positioning System-enabled collars to track the movements and eating habits of a herd of fifty cows. The idea of satellite tracking animals is nothing new, but it's normally for animals that move around just a little bit more in environments a little more challenging than the scenic Yorkshire dales.. Whoever went all the way to "use space technology" to answer the question "What do cows eat?" missed a few simple steps including:
a) Walk over to the cows
b) Look at what the cows are eating
c) Identify this strange green bladed plant that seems to grow everywhere, underneath the sky which is blue.
3. Locating delicious barbecued turtles
Those worried about the ultimate big brother turning us all into obedient cattle (though I can't imagine how anyone would get that idea from this article) doesn't need to worry. The fact is that those satellites are an incredibly large distance away, and while they can watch all they want they can't interfere in any way. Like the lonely soul watching the late night skin flicks, they are to be pitied instead of feared. This was never more clear than the case of the San Diego biologists using GPS tracking to keep an eye on a 50 year old giant sea turtle, 110 kilograms of rare sea animal, and were worried when transmissions ceased after three months. Investigating the creature's last known position, they found that the turtle wasn't well - it was delicious.
A local village had caught and eaten the turtle, the barbecuing and consumption not being a process the transmitter had been designed to deal with. Worse, thousands of school children had been tracking the turtle online to learn about ecology and conservation - and we have to admit this was a much more effective lesson about conservation than the teachers were expecting.
4. The ultimate back seat driver
A safety program tested in the UK could enable satellites to cut your speed from space if it thinks you're going too fast. A little hypocritical, since geosynchronous satellites clock up 3 km/s (that's 6,750 mph) to you, but at thirty million meters up at least they're safe from road rage reprisals. The scheme is called "Intelligent Speed Adaptation" (ISA), showing that those responsible at least have good PR skills because in no way does that name suggest "slowing down" or "we will take over your car".
Unfortunately those behind the study have contaminated their own data: the test cars were twenty modified Skoda Fabias. Unless those modifications went beyond "adding gps controls" and into "make it look like something other than a Skoda Fabia", no-one is going to do anything that risks drawing attention to them driving a Skoda. Besides the fact that people who answer "yes please!" to the question "Would you like to drive a car that won't let you go fast?" are not a good test market, in the same way a chess club isn't a great place to test punchbags.
5. Creating irony
While satellites have been used to find natural resources on Earth and have even been proposed to harvest energy from space , only a group of UK researchers have managed to use space itself to produce that rarest of elements - irony. A team from the University of Surrey designed a compact nanosatellite designed to remove the larger pieces of trash in orbit around the Earth. It's no secret that there's an awful lot of junk up there and that even a fleck of paint moving at orbital velocities can smash a hole in anything (a fact that has been quoted in every single documentary and article on space since 1970).
The SNAP satellite was intended to latch onto a large piece of space debris and use its boosters to heroically pull itself and the junk into re-entry where both burn up. Unfortunately during testing unexpected factors caused the SNAP satellite to veer away from its intended target, and it ran out of fuel before completing its mission. The report is careful not to reveal the final fate of the satellite, so we can conclude that if there ever is a trash-busting SNAP-2, its mission will be "Go up and get rid of SNAP-1".
Unfortunately such a mission isn't on the cards as the team have not yet secured funding for a second trial. It just goes to show - if you want to sell TV or cellphones there are buyers lining up around the block, but doing something stupid like "improving the situation for everyone" won't earn you any money. - tendonut, on 11/19/2007, -1/+0nm
- ronjohn, on 11/19/2007, -2/+1Used to spy on the NAACP
- sunkist22, on 11/19/2007, -2/+1by Fox News led sheep
- coldcarbon, on 11/19/2007, -3/+1#4, I could just see some hacker/cracker take over the sat. and make everyone drive around at 5mph.
For the trash removal. it cost something like 150,000k/ton to go to space so it would be smart to take up a lot more then one trash removal device. I don't know maybe a couple hundred of them. - ggrav, on 11/19/2007, -3/+1Space trash. I hadn't thought of that.
- inactive, on 11/19/2007, -4/+2Then there's this.
http://www.floort.com/?fid=66&ftitle=Spy+Satellite ... - PaulaDawn, on 11/19/2007, -3/+0I haven't laughed so hard in days.
- sneakybeaver, on 11/19/2007, -3/+0Cool!
- sunkist22, on 11/19/2007, -4/+1Pwned? Good one, now that proves you are still in school. Good way of circumventing the issue, and proving to me you do not understand time zones.
A troll is someone who goes on these boards , spouting terms like liberal hate mongering and sheep, and praising fox... and offering no substance to any forum on here. -
Show 51 - 57 of 57 discussions



What is Digg?