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Vaporware '06: Return of the King

wired.com — Pull back the red curtain and dim the lights. It's the 9th annual presentation of the Wired News Vaporware Awards, our ode to the year's top technology products promised, hyped and scheduled, but not delivered.

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  • TheDude77, on 10/12/2007, -2/+21Nuke Em Duke!
    • rubberpants, on 10/12/2007, -0/+32Things that have taken less time than Duke Nukem Forever's Development:

      The United States' entire program to put a man on the moon, from Kennedy's challenge to the landing.

      http://duke.a-13.net/

      The real problem is that no matter how good the game is when/if it comes out, it will still get slammed: "This took n years?" They should cut their losses imo.
    • TheBarge, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3Screw DNF, I quit waiting for that a looooong time ago. I forgot all about "Stalker: Shadow of Chernobyl" though. It seems like a really cool game, but too bad they're completely screwing it up and not giving their fans any updated information about it. Sounds like it's going the same route as DNF.
    • LordofChaosIori, on 10/12/2007, -2/+3@Rubberpants: They're not REALLY working on it... just to keep up with the technology, they would've had to start over around 5 times, or even more already. It'll be a board game if it ever comes out. -_-
    • Rosco, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Now that the FPS gamers have matured, it is almost assured when/if this game ever does see the light of day its antics will seem childish compared to todays modern shooters. Time to close the doors on this one kids, even if it is released it probably won't be worth the effort (or money) to play it.

      The old saying "It's time to chew gum and kick ass" is getting old, and lame.

      The antics that took place in the original were funny, back in the early 90's. It's about to turn 2007 now, the in-game jokes aren't funny any more, they're old and worn out. The dev's are probably spending more time re-writing the game so at least some of the humor may seem somewhat modern, if they are actually working on it at all. I was really looking forward to this game, back in '99. But after games with action like FEAR, the humor in games like the NOLF series, graphics like HL2, upcoming games like STALKER and the plethora of other titles, how can anyone even consider looking at it now other than out of some morbid curiousity.

      And by looking at this list on duke.a-13.net, DNF has either got to be the most spectacular FPS game every made in the history of PC gaming, or a complete and total failure. There cannot be any middle ground on this.
    • llbbl, on 10/12/2007, -7/+1What no Vista? This list sucks!
    • msgyrd, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3Duke Nukem Forever will never be released. It's just a standing joke at this point, for the public and the developers. Actually, I think DN: Forever would be an awesome gag if they sold it as a board game. Talk about a new game engine :)
    • coldfusion1970, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1@ rubberpants

      Great link. I love the lists of things which have happened since DNF was announced ten years ago.

      "The entire cult following of Family Guy! Family Guy has debuted on FOX, been cancelled, entered syndication, been released on DVD, redebuted on FOX, and seen the release of a feature film."
      or
      "The Voyager 1 spacecraft has travelled 8.8 billion miles from Earth."
      or
      "4 nations have acquired nuclear weapons technology."
  • therodersabides, on 10/12/2007, -1/+12"But the readers brought Duke back in 2005, and he was voted King of Vaporware again in 2006. That's right -- two years in a row, three years after being retired from the list."

    Lets hope that someday he will once again kick some ass and chew some bubblegum.
    • Software2, on 10/12/2007, -4/+9I'm afraid he's all out of bubblegum and asses.
    • Fjinks, on 10/12/2007, -4/+5And those alien bastards shot up his ride the 134634th time.

      This really pisses me off!
    • wyrdness, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3They should just give 'Duke Nukem Forever' a Lifetime Achievement Award and be done with it.
  • Ramble, on 10/12/2007, -8/+3I read this on my Phantom console after playing some DNF.
  • chris9902, on 10/12/2007, -6/+5Spore? I wouldn't call it vw just yet. They had a good E3 (with real gameplay *cough*) and never said it was coming out this year.
  • KarbonKopy, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2What about the Phantom Lapboard? That thing has been in limbo forever....forget about the fact they've been taking preorders for 6 months at least? Looks cool, but WHEN will we ever see it?
    • Urusai, on 10/12/2007, -3/+1The Phantom has been debunked as a scam, so its company's products no longer count as vaporware any more than that USD$150 MILLION DOLLARS check from Nigeria that you're expecting.
    • KarbonKopy, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Dude, I was talking about the Phantom LAPBOARD....not the gaming console.....

      Far as I can tell it's a very real product, that's been delayed for a hell of a long time.
    • shredswithpiks, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2is that an infinium labs product? If so, the company doesn't really exist... so don't count on it happening ever.

      otherwise... what?
    • jagooch, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Or those WMD's from Iraq.
  • Pxtl, on 10/12/2007, -4/+3Meh. I played a new Duke Nukem. It was called Serious Sam, and it kicked ass.

    (this joke is also usable for Doom 3, which, while cool, played nothing at all like Doom 1 and 2).
  • robz0r, on 10/12/2007, -6/+1Will this Duke Nukem thing ever end?
    It's pretty much been beaten to death on the "disappointments of the year" for the last 9 years, if it makes a 10th anniversary on any of the lists next year i'll boycott that webpage. I'm fed up with it.
    • OrangeTide, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2We all just keep wondering why these people are still working on it. Is it really possible to get a return on such an investment this company has made? I swear one man teams have taken less time to develop a 3d shooter.

      I could possibly understand if it was an MMO and they were having trouble with the server backend designs and things. But with 3D it seems like you can only add so many features and eye candy before current videocards just give up. Are they waiting for photorealistic graphics and just need videocard technology to catch up to their design?
  • skyshock21, on 10/12/2007, -2/+1Hail to the King, Baby!!!
  • Qwirk, on 10/12/2007, -3/+18. The "IPod Killer": What exactly are they listing here? I don't believe MS listed the Zune as an Ipod killer, I would say that would be media sources saying that.

    You want an Ipod killer? How about on demand satelite radio that stores your favorites and plays them when you want. IE: Whatever the next big thing is.
  • vcleniuk, on 10/12/2007, -6/+1Wish you were here...
  • dvddesign, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Awesome, they finished it before Feb this year.

    Last year's list coulda ended up on this year's list.
  • ph3rny, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2Optimus was only tenth?


    none of the other things on the list got as much hype on digg for sure
    • dbr_onix, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4Digg isn't the end of the Internet.. Spore got *far* more coverage, although I'd hardly call it vapourware (no more so than most other unreleased games. I'm more confused about "TiVoToGo for Mac" being second - the Optimus is far more suited to that position (I get the feeling the writer is a Mac and TiVo user)
      - Ben
  • mecole21, on 10/12/2007, -2/+11What about Chinese Democracy? That's 15 years in the making...
    • HalBSure, on 10/12/2007, -3/+2Although not part of the official definition of "vaporware", it's implied that someone, somewhere has to be looking forward to the release of the product.

      No one is looking forward to Chinese Democracy.
  • flag564, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6Weak list from Wired.

    Many of these products were not all that well known for people to even know they never arrived.

    TiVoToGo for Mac? Huh?
  • Falldog, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3I recall Vista being pushed back several times this year.

    They should do an article for 'vapor-rumors' as well. The iPhone and full screen iPod would top the list.
    • flag564, on 10/12/2007, -2/+4iTablet, iPhone, True Video iPod. Half of their list could be just those things alone.

      It would earn them tons of hate mail, so I guess that why they avoid doing it, and besides, Apple never said they would make them, so I guess they aren't considered vaporware.
  • DeepDoo, on 10/12/2007, -7/+1Can you really call something for the Mac Vaporware?
    They have what? 3-5% of the PC market?
    Maybe TiVo decided to focus on the remaining 95% out there with its development budget.
    That's not Vaporware, that's waking up from a bad decision
  • JonnyTrombone, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1Stalker is based on a novel/movie. The movie ("Stalker") is great. Even if the game never comes out, check the movie. It was done by the same guy who made "Solyaris" (Three times remade, "Solaris" (x2) and "Event Horizon")
  • bart9h, on 10/12/2007, -2/+410. Optimus-103 Keyboard
    9. Stalker: Shadow of Chernobyl
    8. The "IPod Killer"
    7. Gran Turismo 4 Mobile
    6. Airbus A380
    5. SED Televisions
    4. Spore
    3. Skype for Symbian
    2. TiVoToGo for Mac
    1. Duke Nukem Forever
  • axis, on 10/12/2007, -3/+0Chinese Democracy...

    Not computer related but still unseen...
  • ewang, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Personally, I think Tivo should be given a special award. Not only have they not produced TivoToGo for the Mac, but a volunteer group has actually produced their own version of the software (TiVo Decode) while waiting for the official Tivo version.

    Worse, those new HiDef Tivos don't even support TivoToGo for Windows - so they've actually managed to go backwards in the past year.

    Me, bitter? Nah... :-)
  • NTolerance, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Team Fortress 2 should still be up there. Sure, Valve threw us a bone with some new videos and whatnot, but it was supposed to be released in time for the holidays and now it's been delayed...again.
  • snugsoho, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2"3. Skype for Symbian"

    That's an interesting one to see in the list since I have Skype on my Nokia N73.

    http://www.three.co.uk/xseries/features/skype/index.omp
  • rtini, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I love the "iPod killer" entry at #8. From the article:

    "Every time we hear about a new portable audio device, it's touted as the magic bullet that will end the iPod's reign once and for all.

    Oh, you mean that thing? The one with the ugly design and clunky user interface? Does it at least work with iTunes?"
  • robvstheworld, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2You gotta love that the STALKER website is still linking to this: http://rampod.altaica.org/lakemount/index.htm
  • robman30, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1they forgot vista it was supposed to be out this year.they put the TV in there and it is coming out next year so vista should have made it to. but don't want to make microsloth mad.
    • cquinnd, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Vista is out this year, the bells and whistles launch has been held off to give all the PC makers an even start on selling pre-loaded systems, but it would be on store shelves now (and is for some business customers) if not for that.
  • sniper668, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1All I can say is: transistr.com
  •  

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