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Microsofts' spy patent can monitor even your heartbeat

technology.timesonline.co.uk — Every aspect of computer users’ lives — from their heartbeat to a guilty smile — could be monitored and immediately analysed under the futuristic system detailed in Microsoft’s patent application. The systems work not only through desktop or laptop computers but even through mobile phones or handheld PCs

Who dugg this? Made popular Jan 17, 2008

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  • inactive, on 01/17/2008, -0/+35OK Microsoft employees, you're first!
  • Alex2, on 01/17/2008, -2/+35As long as Microsoft has this technology patented, this means that Homeland Security can't use it to spy on Americans without having to pay MS royalties.

    Life is good again.
  • inactive, on 01/17/2008, -0/+28 Who will honestly want to work for any company that has you under that kind of surveillance?
  • avoss, on 01/17/2008, -0/+21You should WELCOME the telescreen. After all, Microsoft is the ministry of LOVE.
    2 + 2 = 5
  • hardcorerikki, on 01/17/2008, -0/+16All your every moves are belong to us! And all your eye blinks too
  • Azerael, on 01/17/2008, -1/+16We might end up not having any choice.
  • lordmetroid, on 01/17/2008, -0/+13When did people in the state ever care about their own rules?
  • AriaStar, on 01/17/2008, -3/+15I'm extremely disturbed by this.
  • chrismcelligott, on 01/17/2008, -0/+12Simply ridiculous, they're going to need to start hiring new people because if they implemented this at my workplace, I certainly wouldn't be hanging around.
  • Latent7, on 01/17/2008, -0/+11"The system works by recording and analyzing what words and numbers are used or websites visited, and by watching the user’s heart rate, breathing, body temperature, facial expressions and blood pressure."

    I'm just curious how hey monitor heart rate, breathing, body temperature, facial expressions and blood pressure. Does this mean the user would be hooked up to an EKG - Laser scanning facial expression detector type device?

    How would anyone get work done with all of those interfaces???
  • CresseyChaos, on 01/17/2008, -0/+11I don't really see how it helps at all...
    "His heartrate is increasing rapidly sir"
    "Really? What's he doing?"
    "Looking at porn"
    "Johnson take note, male around 19 years of age, likes porn!"
  • dafragsta, on 01/17/2008, -1/+12The land of the [REDACTED] home of the [REDACTED]!
  • buckrogers1965, on 01/17/2008, -0/+11Can it monitor me flipping it off continuously with both hands and cussing the entire time I am being monitored?
  • BentleyGT07, on 01/17/2008, -0/+9Don't let the government know about this.
  • inactive, on 01/17/2008, -0/+9Such behavior will get you scheduled for "Corrective therapy". Your uncontrolled emotional outbursts are a threat to yourself and everyone around you but dont worry after a few forced doses of anti psychotics and electro shock you will be ready to tow the line.
  • AndrewDB, on 01/17/2008, -0/+8Hm, it may be strange to say it, but can't people sue over invasion of privacy?
  • SQLserver, on 01/17/2008, -4/+10And that's why I use Linux.
  • ronaldmonster, on 01/17/2008, -0/+6I'm pretty sure he meant,
    Microsoft's new spy patent can monitor everything, including your heartbeat.
  • mst3kcrow, on 01/17/2008, -0/+5A few notches away from installing a neural net processor.
  • and303, on 01/17/2008, -0/+5Am I the only person here that read the word PATENT?
    Microsoft literally has tens of thousands of patents. That doesn't mean this device exists. It just means that if it ever does, whoever makes it will owe royalty to Microsoft.
    ...and buried for horrible grammar. Try again.
  • jdepp, on 01/17/2008, -0/+5Winston!
  • argusbargus, on 01/17/2008, -0/+4How come there is only one employee with a count in the "chair throwing" metric?
  • starsky51, on 01/17/2008, -1/+5I'm surprised no one has pointed this out yet. Microsoft's intention is to use this technology to monitor the stress levels of people testing new versions of Microsoft products. It would show them which parts of the interface are tough to deal with.
    I'm not a Microsoft fan but all this 'they want to spy on me!' business is a bit over the top.
    Now please bring on the 'that's what they WANT you to think!' replies.
  • Murdats, on 01/17/2008, -0/+4well facial expressions and possibly breathing could be done with a good quality camera (which a lot of laptops have already)
    heart rate and blood pressure though, thats a bit harder.
  • ChrisViz, on 01/17/2008, -0/+3Funny 'cause its true.
  • jdepp, on 01/17/2008, -1/+4as long as they keep the feature where it remotely administers cyanide to kill off the least productive 3% of the workforce each time the share-price dips, I'm all for it!

  • inactive, on 01/17/2008, -0/+3My thoughts exactly Azerael.
  • insllvn, on 01/17/2008, -0/+3That is what they want you to think.

    You are Welcome.
  • roodammy44, on 01/17/2008, -0/+3You know that it will be hacked the week it comes out.....
  • darkgrrrl, on 01/17/2008, -0/+3Even if that is true, MS is a for-profit company. If they can find a way to monetize the technology, they will. And once it's handed over to a customer like Homeland Security, MS can wash their hands of responsibility regarding what is done with it.
  • SniperZero, on 01/17/2008, -0/+3Great my life is now going to depend on microsoft software. I didn't think that would be what would wipe out the human race.
  • TheSabre, on 01/17/2008, -0/+3Considering that they are the ones granting the patent, I'd say they already know.
  • fearthereaperx, on 01/17/2008, -0/+3My CPU is a neural net processor, a learning computer
  • airtonix, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2Maybe they will join this with their 'trusted computing platform' concepts to further lock you into their 'shopping mall OS'

    sounds just like zeeks & fairies from Sharpies world. forgot the author, but it was very 'william gibson'.
  • pcsourcepoint, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2Might mean a huge swing away from their products...particularly their web email accounts, where what you type is encrypted and sent to them...
  • LaerrusFish, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2Bill Gates retired recently. . . maybe the government bought him out.
  • badassninja, on 01/18/2008, -0/+2The Future of Microsoft, is one with out me.
  • ChrisViz, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2You kill humor.
  • glock22ownr, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKT_09pARN4

    Wonder how that guy rates on their super dee duper system?
  • inactive, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2Possibly through your contact with the mouse pad? just a guess.
  • EntropyFan, on 01/17/2008, -1/+3Yes, the tin-foil hat crew usually is.
    Now think about this: when you deal with people in the real world, do you look at them? Do you listen to the tone of their voice? Do you pay attention enough to know they are irritated, or in a hurry? Then you 'spy' on these people already, and they 'spy' on you.
  • MeatBiProduct, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2LOL

    biometrics have been around for how long? I think something like this would make sense if you were working in a mine or industrial installations. Everyone wants to think of the office worker dicking off (like we all do) and get scared that they'll get caught.
  • MarkOfTheDead, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2That's when you tell them you have suicidal urges and the one thing keeping everything in check is the consistency of your job and lifestyle. Bosses tend to leave you alone or send you to HR where they'll try to talk you out of suicide and you can sit and nod and appear to be saved by them and want to live and everyone wins.
  • AndrewDB, on 01/17/2008, -1/+3No it's not. It's a company, trying to find out every single thing about my personal life.

    It's an invasion of privacy..
  • MeatBiProduct, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2me: hey doctor am i stressed?
    doctor: i dunno are you?
  • aliguana, on 01/17/2008, -0/+2good. no more playing minesweeper or falling asleep in your cube. Now, about those TPS reports...
  • blackthorn, on 01/17/2008, -2/+4Beware of Micro$oft keyboard , mouse. They may contain sensors. Don't even think to get a web-cam from they.
  • inactive, on 01/21/2008, -0/+1No...it is a PATENT you dumb *****.
  • demizer, on 01/17/2008, -0/+1Imagine Two Minutes Hate starring Bill Gates....
  • fiestycrumbler, on 01/18/2008, -0/+1sweet now they can watch me beat the sh!t out of it
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