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59 Comments
- sachmanb, on 10/12/2007, -0/+35 i really hope it doesn't take people all of college to figure out to stick HTML tags around content.....
- Ratty, on 10/12/2007, -0/+23The XHTML he claims will validate (hello4.php), will in fact fail. The 'Hello world' text must be inside a 'p' or 'div' tag
- Ascendant, on 10/12/2007, -2/+23more complex code = job security, right?
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -1/+11The newbie web programmer
- JavaScript clocks!
- Animated menus
- 500 KB background images
- ASCII art in the title bar
- Client-side scripting rulez, server-side scripting is mysterious and frightening
The intermediate web programmer
- Writes everything from scratch; other programmers are idiots
- Spell-checks comments
- Coding style changes every two days; must rewrite all previous code
- As long as it works in Firefox
- Server-side scripting rulez, client-side scripting sux
The semi-professional web programmer
- Writes nothing from scratch
- Comments? Comments are redundant, just read the code
- 6 and 7 levels of PHP includes
- Imports huge libraries to access single functions
- As long as it works in IE
The professional web programmer
- ...don't know, haven't gotten there yet ;-) - J3R3MY, on 10/12/2007, -3/+11Looks like digg killed google. Not a good sign.
Someone really needs to make a duggmirror firefox extension. - picktwo, on 10/12/2007, -1/+8Your link is in the story title: "I feel forced to REWRITE the popular "The Evolution of a Programmer" joke for web developers/web designers." so RTFA before posting negative comments.
- paulcooper, on 10/12/2007, -1/+7What? You mean like Yahoo!'s PHP architecture does exactly what you are claiming PHP cannot do?
Don't make baseless claims. - captainpete, on 10/12/2007, -2/+6The Programmer one was funny because it was true. This was just lame.
- tehsuck, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4Dude forgot to close his tag in one of the examples, doesn't validate. Lame.
- elijahalcantara, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3Not funny at all... the earlier article copied from is better.
- Piku, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3@ABadInAlbany: You don't need to run PHP in a framework. A cluster of a lot but cheap servers will do it. Also, you need to scale the SQL servers and put reverse proxies in front (Squid). Check out Wikipedia's network.
- se7en11, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3You had me at "hello", but lost me at "...I don't have nothing..."
- fl00d, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4"New Manager
hello.doc
Hello world!
File > Export HTML page..."
hilarious! - Piku, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3I wasn't talking about moving existing enterprises, of course it's too hard to recode. I was talking about the scalability of PHP so that you don't need a big expensive mainframe but rather add cheap servers into the cluster.
PS: It was mainframe not framework in my early post, sorry. - ABadInAlbany, on 10/12/2007, -3/+5@captainpete: 100% true my friend. echoing my own sentiments from above.
- tlehman, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2<lame />
- scooter12, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2"I must add that I don't have nothing against professionalism in web development.."
You should write on the evolution of composing double negatives.... - ABadInAlbany, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3@Piku ... WTF is the relevance of your comment? You can't just transplant existing enterprises into whatever architecture you'd prefer for your personal mastubatory programming enjoyment. Hundreds of thousands, millions, of dollars, and comparable numbers of manhours, are invested in existing architecture. It's an unavoidable fact. You have to deal with reality in the business world, not ideal scenarios.
- paulcooper, on 10/12/2007, -2/+4This is not even funny...why would anyone digg this? Its like a really bad attempt to copy with FAR less work put into it - have you people even _read_ 'Evolution of a Programmer' - now thats comic gold.
- yahoofrom, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Spammer:
while(true){ window.alert("Hello, World");} - jerrro, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1*Sigh*...lame!
- seventoes, on 10/12/2007, -2/+3What? Whats wrong with javascript clocks? o.O
- DoubleMike, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1That is a lot more accurate than the actual article, and is actually a little funny. (TFA is a joke of a joke, if you know what I mean) As a professional web developer, I'd say you're on the right track. The biggest differences between your "semi-professional" and a real professional are that the professional just copy-and-pastes the part of the library he needs instead of importing the whole thing, and that he knows that some unreadable code is best explained with a comment (usually about 4-6 words long). There might be up to 12-14 levels of includes (or 16 includes in a row), and he never even worries about IE because the HTML comes from the designer, it's his job just to make sure it's output reasonably accurately. If he's on a project with a documentation team, then the code quickly becomes 65% comments, which the programmer then refuses to update to reflect any changes, causing instant nightmares for anyone that tries to use the code for it's intended purpose. It's never his fault, however, because there is the code documentation person to blame.
- Nanobe, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Where's the stage when you realize that XHTML can't be used correctly in any widely (IE-inclusive) compatible way because otherwise all you're doing is writing the page like XHTML but having browsers treat it like plain old HTML anyway?
- theadvinci, on 05/27/2008, -0/+1Great:D
- slapout, on 10/12/2007, -3/+4Come on people, it's just a joke. If you don't think it's funny, fine, move on. No need to get all upset about it.
I personally laughed at it. - PonyGumbo, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Frankly, I just get excited to see folks using doctypes at all.
- zjbird, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1He seems smart...but then he writes a sentence like "I must add that I don't have nothing against professionalism"... he must still be in the jr. high part of his joke
- nhassan, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1yeh.
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -2/+3When I was 14 I wrote a stock market simulation in BASIC that ran at Ventura Hall's (Stanford University) PDP-8. The program was loaded from paper tape. The output was on a terminal. So what?! (Well, I got an A in my 8th grade economics class at Jordan Junior High..but)
Scripting requires many of the same skills of deconstruction and analysis that programming does, but scripting is used much more often in simpler applications. A competent JAVA programmer can pick up a scripting language in a FRACTION of the time a JavaScript person can learn to develop with Java. - lordNacho, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Under "New designer"...blink doesn't work in all browsers
- addicted68098, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1LOL it seems like a rewind of my web developing history, luckily I got out of PHP, and into the nice django.
- Aramil, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1@ScooterMX
That is a baseless and ignorant comment, I started out in PHP and Javascript and because of it being based around C/C++ I was quite capable of picking the languages up fairly quickly, despite the fact that I still prefer the 'Ctrl+S > Alt+Tab > Ctrl+R' button combo to recompiling. - DoubleMike, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2and I've never seen any "professional" write php code that badly. Seriously, rewriting that joke from a more modern perspective was a good idea, but he wasn't the one that should have done it. Now he's ruined it for all of us.
- ABadInAlbany, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2oh noes! now I'm crying! the widdel WoW player just bwocked me mommy! whaaaaaambulance time.
- ABadInAlbany, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2@paulcooper: yes, I mean precisely that. show me the capacity to integrate with a mainframe -- mainframes, they're large, expensive computers with far more processing capacity than the rinky dink boxes you're apparently familiar with, and they happen to continue to drive the enterprise for many (most) of the world's largest corporations -- and do so in a clean, reusable architecture, and I'll accept PHP as the pinnacle of web development. yes, there's work towards PHP-mainframe cooperation, but it's just not there yet, it's nowhere close to proven. Java is the enterprise king, and the web is the world's largest customer-facing enterprise interface in the years to come. Personally I'm a .Net guy, but I respect Java's unquestionable enterprise dominance.
- ABadInAlbany, on 10/12/2007, -3/+3People who digg this I guarantee you are people who think themselves to be highly evolved web devs or designers, but if you ever put them in a real job role, they'd fail miserably, go back home to mommy's basement, and lie in a fetal position until one of their WoW friends called 911 because they were late for a WoW raid.
- senfo, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1Commodity depends on individual taste. You might not find it funny; but another person may. However, understanding that [as of this posting] 511 people have dugg this story, it's obvious that some digg users do find this amusing enough to deserve a digg. With that in mind, it was worthy enough to make it to the front page if the majority of digg uses thought it was. So where then, do you suggest somebody post this kind of article so that it's not considered spam? Contrary to some peoples belief, blogs are not all bad. They're a free way to express your ideas to the world. If their owners wish to have ads on their blog, then they have every right to put them there.
- lightningrod220, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1ABadInAlbany blocked in 3... 2... 1...
- whymanwhy, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS yeeeeaahhh - Ballmer
- occularrifts, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0there is a greasemonkey script that adds links to duggmirror coral cache and google cache
- Grimboy, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1Actually so some java html parsing library is able to digest self closing tags.
- chaoskaizer, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0 nice effort.. i dont agree with the "Professional CSS Front-End Architect (sarcasm)" its overdone
- finalcountdown, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0This reminds me of me except that i started the High school level at 4th grade by now i'm at higher php person level
- ABadInAlbany, on 10/12/2007, -12/+11but what you're all ignoring is the fact that ... well ... it's just plain lame. not even borderline funny. it's a hack of an attempt at humor -- and that's being kind. besides, everybody knows any new "designer" probably started in a GUI tool, and PHP, the pinnacle of web development? hahahahahaha. Yes, PHP has its strengths, but an enterprise Java guy doing financial/trading websites will toast a PHP guy any day of the week, and I'd love to see PHP handle an enterprise-level, mainframe-integrated insurance system the way the .Net, COM and Java setup does where I work.
- andykram, on 10/12/2007, -4/+3Compress the time frame to 8th grade - Senior year of HS and its a little closer for me...
- maexus, on 10/12/2007, -6/+4MySpace administrator
We need to throw more servers at the hello world page - ecordell, on 10/12/2007, -2/+0There are so many issues mixed into all this commentary that I went a way to blog it at
http://ecordell.blogspot.com/2007/01/this-is-written-in-reaction-to-links.html
and when I came back to post this, there was even more. The funnier of the two was probably the original, but I think the general idea is that the evolutionary chain seems to be from simple-but-adequate to complex-but-unworkable and back to simple-but-inadequate. That's how many of my late-night coding sessions seem to go, too . . . - inactive, on 10/12/2007, -3/+1it wasn't funny until the very last part, where you realise he has no fecking clue how to write even basic ASP.... let alone C#.NET and then as a REAL developer , well in my case you fall off your chair and hurt your delicate pinky
- ABadInAlbany, on 10/12/2007, -6/+4spam, and lame ... now why isn't there a bury flag for BOTH those conditions together? or how about one that's just called "pathetic" ?
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