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197 Comments
- Humptydank, on 10/12/2007, -3/+150
Women send sexually explicit signals to men without having much interest them for the same reason a Mexican kid hits a pinata -- if you do it long enough valuable things fly out of them, like drinks, dinners, and tennis bracelets. - Lixie, on 10/12/2007, -13/+147Women crave attention. Flirting gets women attention.
- diggfinity, on 10/20/2007, -0/+130There was a girl who worked at the service desk at my local car dealership. I went in for an oil change and she is *completely* flirting with me. She also shows me pictures of her son and makes mention to the fact that she's a single mom about three times. She made passing comments like "It sure is hard being all alone in that house...." or "I wish I had someone to help me with things..." and once even a "Boy, it's so hot today. Good thing I left the air conditioner on in my bedroom..."
Okay. It's obvious she's setting me up. All I have to do is swing the bat, right? I finally ask her if she'd like to meet for coffee some time. "Sorry, I'm seeing someone."
WTF? Any ladies want to explain on her behalf? - BassMastr, on 10/12/2007, -4/+116"A woman sends sexually explicit signals without having much interest in the man."
This should make all guys feel better about all the girls we have slept with and never called back. Let's just consider it even for all the times you chicks pulled the above ***** on some guy, and he spent all night buying you drinks. :) - qshady, on 10/12/2007, -2/+99do you really need a lady to explain to you that this person's actions are NOT a factor of her gender, but rather they stem directly from the painfully apparent fact that she is an attention-seeking, insecure, manipulative MORON.
My other hypothesis is that she was looking for a quick *****, in which case she doesn't want to waste her time on a daytime coffee date. - andnever, on 10/12/2007, -5/+101in other news women are ***** crazy
- masamunecyrus, on 10/12/2007, -3/+68I don't know whether to laugh or to cry because this will likely become the new "in Soviet Russia _____" fad.
- bruin7089, on 10/12/2007, -0/+54"One of the surprising facts in this study was that women do not send clear rejection signals."
I always thought they were pretty clear to me. - po43292, on 10/12/2007, -2/+55NEVER buy drinks for a girl you don't know!
- davecor, on 10/20/2007, -3/+54You are correct! After you are married, the answer will be "NO!"
- Gatesophile, on 10/12/2007, -3/+51first off, I am a girl. Now, my theory:
this woman sounds like she was taken, but had a sort of "crush" on you. She doesn't want just a casual "coffee" date from you, she wanted a guy that would just pounce on her right then and there.
She probably just wanted to feel desirable from a guy that she thought was cute. Maybe she didn't feel attractive anymore. - doctorcaligari, on 10/20/2007, -1/+39I KNEW IT! I knew I wasn't imagining this *****!
I hear women all the time wonder why some guy just "won't get the hint". Maybe it's because you call him all the time and talk for hours. Maybe it's because you keep smiling at him, and asking him to join you for lunch/coffee/etc. Since I experienced this alot during my dating days, I can totally agree with the article's assertion that women do not send clear enough signal of rejection.
Thank god I am getting married so I don't have to deal with this crap anymore. Sure, I'll have to worry about a whole new set of crap, but at least I don't have to wonder "Does she want to sleep with me?" - Nysul, on 10/12/2007, -4/+411) She's a single mom, what did you expect. Single moms are nothing but trouble.
2) You asked her out for coffee. This isn't your future wife you're looking at (seeing how she is a single mom) she probably just wanted to be banged, and you don't get banged after coffee.
3) Next time ask her what time she is having dinner. She'll probably say 6 or 7 or something, expecting you to ask her to dinner. Don't. Instead ask her out for drinks at 7 or 8. This will save you from having to pay for dinner, and paying for dinner never gets you any closer anyways. - DrGonzo1184, on 10/12/2007, -4/+38Am I the only one getting tired of the ATHF references at the top of EVERY comment page on Digg? I mean, it was funny as all ***** that the Boston PD was that stupid, but come one, lets not kill it so soon.
- brhad56, on 10/20/2007, -3/+35I'm a guy, and here is my explanation: She's a woman. There is no 'why' to anything they do.. They just do. Don't bother looking for logic or reason in a womans actions/words.
- BassMastr, on 10/12/2007, -3/+33No wonder every time I talk to a woman I think...
"She wants me" :) - phatvolvo, on 10/12/2007, -0/+28that's "you're a douche" in woman
- davecor, on 10/12/2007, -2/+30It's the old "If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it..." problem.
If a woman is beautiful, but nobody reacts... is she really beautiful? Want a girl all over you? Don't react to her hotness - She will turn it up a few notches.
Some women will use guys to reassure themselves they've "got it".
Run like hell if you meet one of these... they are just trouble. - smackhero, on 10/12/2007, -1/+28no, if he were a douche he'd atleast have contact with vagina.
- wilf_brim, on 10/12/2007, -4/+30Why do women do this. As a med school classmate once told me "They can't help it. They have hormone COURSING through their veins."
The simpler (and less sexist) answer is above. The flirting behaviors (usually subconscious) result in attention, which resulted in positive outcomes in the past. The amazing part is that the most flirty women complain about "all those creepy guys that keep bugging them." - po43292, on 10/12/2007, -1/+26"she want is you to go away."
- Fracture98, on 10/12/2007, -4/+29Nah. It's because in braille, they can only spell 'C'.
- SteveRogers, on 10/12/2007, -0/+25LOL @ your soul-crushing virginity.
- ldavid, on 10/12/2007, -2/+24This is why it's so damn hard to read women..
- smackhero, on 10/20/2007, -1/+20learn how to read: "A woman sends sexually explicit signals without having much interest in the man." "This behavior may encourage men to reveal more about themselves, the authors suggest, allowing women to verify their initial impressions."
- eqisow, on 10/20/2007, -2/+21faskippy, if you think that's a clear signal... well, it's not. Men are direct and we appreciate the same from women. (well, I do, at least) Cut the mind games, say what you mean. Your husband will appreciate it.
Note: Other women may consider this a public service announcement. - AriaStar, on 10/12/2007, -28/+45Guys, here's why women send mixed signals. We do it on purpose. See, we feel so bad about ourselves from what we see on TV and in magazines that that we are told is perfect. So, if we can get men to show interest in us, it helps us feel better about ourselves. It makes us feel attractive and desirable despite all of our imperfections. When I know I can get other men interested in me, I'm a better girlfriend because I'm not thinking so much about why the hell he's with me when I'm so ugly by magazine standards and instead feel sexy.
And girls who feel sexy aren't so afraid of taking their clothes off. And you know what happens next.
And @ masamunecyrus:
My boyfriend is from Soviet Russia. Those guys make great lovers. - CrazyPirate, on 10/12/2007, -2/+19Ha. I would have to disagree. The last one I got was "I don't think I'm ready to be more than friends right now." Don't think? Right now? I was hella confused for a fair amount of time.
- quiksliver, on 10/12/2007, -1/+18maybe she was just bored?
I find women are MUCH more social then men, personally I can go an entire week or longer without having a face to face convo with anyone at all, and minimal contact with online buddies. While my mom and sister can't go more than 30 minutes alone or without talking to someone
in class the girls are always the ones constantly talking, and yes this includes flirting because a] its for attention, and all the guys flock around you once they can see you'll put out and b] normal conversation gets old and flirting brightens it up
just my 2 cents - notouch, on 10/20/2007, -0/+17faskippy: I don't think that was clear enough. By buying him drink the next round would give him the impression that you want to keep drinking/chatting with him.
A clear signal would be flat out reject his offer for buying you drink, insist on paying for your own. - afx1, on 10/12/2007, -0/+14There's nothing mixed about mace in my eyes.
- Linh, on 10/12/2007, -4/+18well no f'in *****. thank you captain obvious. I hope my tax money doesn't somehow fund this crap
- Fracture98, on 10/12/2007, -0/+14"sexually explicit". You keep using those words. I don't think they mean what you think they mean.
- doctorcaligari, on 10/12/2007, -2/+15@davecor
Although my fiance maintains otherwise, I am more inclined to believe your comment. All my buddies say the same thing.
As an addition to my post, there was a good comment in the article about guys talking too much. I was one of those guys, and I realized that women hate it when you talk more than them. It turns them off faster than the phrase "I like computers and comic books".
So my dating advice is: Keep your mouth shut and let her control the conversation. Keep your comments to 2-3 sentences MAX. It makes you seem more interesting, and that you are more interested in them than yourself. My success rate went way up after I figured that out. - Comatose51, on 10/12/2007, -1/+14Yes, thanks to all the non-digg males out there who got even for all the nerds here.... go teamwork
Yet, I still feel strangely empty inside. - zomgflamer, on 10/12/2007, -1/+14Ask Benjamin Franklin. He is know to get high level sexual signals from beautiful women. Mr. Lincoln works too but they tend to get lower in quality.
- markperia, on 10/12/2007, -3/+16exactly! Thats the only explanation needed. Case closed.
- PaulLev, on 10/12/2007, -1/+13They needed a study to tell us this?
- 4NDr01D, on 10/20/2007, -0/+12she was just talking,
apparently women talk a lot,
but (usually) say the same thing over and over
but its HOW they say it, that matters
but men go into ignore mode since there isnt any new information,
only subtle contextual changes.
hence problems in communication continue - brhad56, on 10/12/2007, -2/+14I've done the "She wants me" thing before. It works. It gives the illusion of confidence. Women are attracted to confidence. So, I believe that thinking to yourself 'she wants me' makes you more attractive to women. If you're feeling really brazen, tell her "you want me" out loud. If she denies it, you can follow up with, "You just don't know it yet."
- smackhero, on 10/12/2007, -0/+12bitter much?
- yukevster, on 10/12/2007, -3/+15Digg commenters sadden me much of the time but digging down the only female comment (AriaStar) and her frank opinions on an article about how women think takes the cake.
Once a geek, always a geek I guess. - bioskope, on 10/20/2007, -1/+12and I thought it was just my perverted mind's imagination all this while...
- GliTCH82, on 10/12/2007, -1/+11@AriaStar
That is a pretty good explanation for women who are somewhat insecure about their looks, but what about women who know they're sexy, are told they're sexy, feel sexy, and yet still send mixed signals? - neuralcooker, on 10/12/2007, -1/+10Maybe a good strategy at that point is to start sending her a bunch of mixed signals to throw her off, just like she did to you. Not sure what it would get you but it might illustrate your frustration to her at that point.
- brotherfranciz, on 10/12/2007, -3/+11*Wags tail*
*Puts on "please take me home with you" puppy eyes*... - mushoo, on 10/12/2007, -0/+7You obviously missed the part where he mentions god. If god didn't make you rich and handsome it means he hates you and doesn't want you to get laid.
- ZanCakes, on 10/12/2007, -0/+7I tend to flip my hair when it gets in my face.
I apologize for sending mixed signals. - brotherfranciz, on 10/12/2007, -0/+7"The amazing part is that the most flirty women complain about "all those creepy guys that keep bugging them.""
haha, that's me!!! I think someone owes me an apology...
/jk... - 4NDr01D, on 10/12/2007, -3/+9yeah she want's you to go away
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