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Low-Cost Way to Scare Neighbor Countries: Inflatable Weapons

gizmodo.com — Are you the dictator of a country that's desperate to seem powerful to its neighbors, but not quite rich enough to afford the armaments it wants? Take a page from the Fortitude South and buy these inflatable versions of scary military equipment!

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  • cdoxie, on 09/11/2008, -18/+1link?
  • zearle, on 09/11/2008, -18/+6Someday war will not be cool...
    Until then.
    Have at it you fools...
  • nattyb79, on 09/11/2008, -1/+70It's like the Scarecrow of National Defense.
    • root1657, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1Yeah, except that no decent spy satellite would fall for that. The problem is that it's a balloon, and so it's mostly the same temperature, maybe a little warmer on the sunny side, and a little less on the shady side. Real machines would have all kinds of temperature gradients all over them where the support structures and engines and things like that are. Most machines are a tangled web of different temperatures. an optical picture would see tanks and such, but a thermal picture would see a balloon.

      I think I read something in a spy novel (Scorpion in the sea?) about someone trying something like this with a submarine, and the guy who noticed the whole thing was the same temperature, and how it was an attempt to make someone who was just giving a quick glance think that it didn't leave port... and the real submarine was up to something somewhere.

      Would make for a hell of a pool toy though...
    • dosher199, on 09/12/2008, -0/+2Our New Zealand defense force probably couldn't afford those.
      We're screwed. :(
  • edwartica, on 09/11/2008, -10/+3Insert "In soviet russia" joke here.
    • Jdban, on 09/11/2008, -6/+1Alright.
      In Soviet Russia, air protects you!


      (sorry its bad)
      • Tobey, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1Wow. You see, in order to do a good Russian Reversal, you have to actually reverse something. If you'll look a few posts down, NovaCloud will show you how it's done...
    • ccb621, on 09/11/2008, -2/+12In Soviet Russia joke insert you.

      With apologies,
      CB
    • qu6767, on 09/11/2008, -2/+1Remember the 60's, well I don't wasn't here yet, but the Cuban missile crisis. Maybe Russia has been using these for over 40 years
    • Unzorn, on 09/12/2008, -1/+4In Soviet Russia, balloons blow up you!
  • ChronicColonic, on 09/11/2008, -2/+20Weapons that blow up without hurting anyone? You could stand right next to them when they blow up and not get hurt? Wow.
    • ufia, on 09/12/2008, -0/+8That would confuse the hell out of spy satellites when they see playful children bouncing on top of tanks or missile launchers.
  • DaviDTC, on 09/11/2008, -4/+43Those would give Bush enough reasons to invade.
    • H0tKarl, on 09/12/2008, -2/+5That's about the best thing that can happen to a small country. A couple years of war, followed my 20 years of cold, hard, American taxpayer aid.
    • gweedo767, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1Don't you mean Palin?
  • NovaCloud, on 09/11/2008, -7/+157In Soviet Russia, YOU blow the weapons up!
    • djoobacca, on 09/11/2008, -31/+4In fascist USA, weapons blow YOU up.
    • thesparrowband, on 09/12/2008, -2/+36possibly the most clever use of that meme ever
    • BossKey, on 09/12/2008, -15/+2should be
      "In Soviet Russia, you blow up *your own* weapons!"
      • theOster, on 09/12/2008, -1/+4nah - the way he did it was subtle. it's better that way.
      • BossKey, on 09/12/2008, -3/+1Yeah, but normally you're always blowing up the *other guy's* weapons, so it's not as much of a reversal. OK so maybe I should have left out the asterisks or something.

        Sorry, I'm picky about Soviet Russia jokes because there are so many badly constructed unfunny ones. (The parent post is not one of those.)
    • JeffLongoria, on 09/12/2008, -3/+6I SWEAR that was the best and most clever use of that meme ever. I wish I could give u 500 diggs, LoL
  • jirnik, on 09/11/2008, -4/+9I read this as Lost Cow to Scare Neighbors. I need to go to sleep.
  • DubBucket, on 09/11/2008, -2/+49Iran already proved all you need is photoshop...
  • djoobacca, on 09/11/2008, -7/+1Iran should get some of those as decoys for when US tries to invade them.
  • figgme, on 09/11/2008, -7/+1won't someone please think of the children!
  • kyleforeman, on 09/11/2008, -3/+55Vladamir, start blowing. Our turret has gone limp.
    • Apocolypse007, on 09/12/2008, -0/+5Am I the only one that comment sounded gay to?
  • tradderjohn, on 09/11/2008, -3/+10theres probally 40 analysts looking at the photo's now. we've found the WMD
    weapons of mass delusion
    • torchednoodle, on 09/11/2008, -0/+4$100 bucks says this silly crap wouldn't fool American defense satellite analysts. The problem of course would be when they send this up to the Bush administration along with their recommendation that these are just balloons, and Dick Cheney declares the analysts don't know what they're talking about and tells the president we should go to war.

      It's not like it hasn't happened before
    • digg-dugg, on 09/12/2008, -0/+3dude, these would go great in my pool.
  • theotheragentm, on 09/11/2008, -1/+9Also, in times of peace, you have tons of moon bounces.
  • jttennisplaya81, on 09/11/2008, -1/+6I don't think that would scare too many countries, maybe just piss them off enough to come and fight you....and then laugh as you get your ass kicked because all you have are inflatable weapons...
  • neocr0n, on 09/11/2008, -2/+44I think the British did something similar during WWII with wooden planes and fake air force bases in the south. All to keep the German bombs away from the real bases.
  • beasty_dave_Mk2, on 09/11/2008, -3/+5Pertinent story I read about in a magazine in the 80's about the famous wooden airfield in Nazi occupied Holland...I attempted to use the googles and damnit it all to hell if snopes' doesn't wreck all my fun;

    http://www.snopes.com/military/woodbomb.asp
  • CIAVT, on 09/11/2008, -2/+38In times of peace your inflatable fort can double as a bouncy castle!
  • regicide, on 09/11/2008, -3/+22Didn't the U.S. use this tactic a few days before D-Day?
  • Br3ach, on 09/11/2008, -8/+3Wasnt this on Digg a few days ago?
    • recruz, on 09/11/2008, -1/+5wasn't everything on digg a few days ago?
      • Chachuka, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1Wasn't digg on digg a few diggs ago?
  • Scriabin, on 09/11/2008, -3/+26The USA and allies did this early in the Normandy invasion to intimidate the nazis. They had inflatable tanks and artillery, and fake camps set up, to make up for their, at the time, lacking military strength... it's like what Hannibal did to Rome, when he lit more fires than necessary to make the Romans think there were a ton of soldiers there. It actually works! Well, if they don't look as obviously faked as these do.
    • Jeepinator, on 09/11/2008, -1/+4I believe there was an entire fake division that the Germans were fed information about. To extend the fake until the last minute they flew planes across the channel back and forth scattering foil strips. It made the German radar operators believe that there was an invasion force approaching from the location of the "known" division at about 8 knots.
  • bsl4doc, on 09/11/2008, -2/+10Wow, inflatable weapons and tanks were great when we used them back in the 1940s...hardly a new idea. Look up Operation Fortitude.
  • vondrak, on 09/11/2008, -1/+6Why not, they tricked the Germans before D-Day
  • spritom, on 09/11/2008, -1/+7Now my kids are going to want to go out in the yard and jump on the bouncy ICBM site.
  • thegrantman, on 09/11/2008, -1/+7These weapons blow.
  • MadEnvoy, on 09/11/2008, -1/+10Iraq and the U.S. did this during the first Gulf war. This type of deception dates way, way back.

    http://www.psywarrior.com/DeceptionH.html
    http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/gulf/oral/ ...
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Fortitude
    • megaloid, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1The Serbs also used tons of decoys during the 1999 Kosovo war, thereby causing the NATO forces to waste hundreds of expensive precision-guided weapons.
      • eigenweasel, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1By far the coolest of which was smashing the front window of a microwave oven and placing it on an expendable building.
        NATO Homing Anti Radiation Missiles would think it was a mobile AA radar and take the site out for you.
        Then have a smoke and some Stara Sokolova, and next time you hear anything faintly mechanical in the air, turn on the radar for your Shilka and start clearing the skies.
  • billbugger, on 09/11/2008, -1/+2I want a few to scare the neighbors with.
  • ChayD, on 09/11/2008, -0/+6Man, I sooo want one of those inflatable ICBM launchers
  • Anth0n, on 09/11/2008, -1/+3The most popular balloons for Republican birthdays.
  • leha, on 09/11/2008, -0/+6An inflatable tank cost a few hundred dollars, a rocket used to blow it up cost a few hundred thousand. On top of this by making your enemy use ammunition on balloons forces him to send planes back to an airport to refill thus removing them from conflict area.
    • megaloid, on 09/12/2008, -1/+2See Serbia for the most recent example.
  • davidrools, on 09/11/2008, -0/+1I imagine a future war something like a real-life ender's game with millions of "soldiers" age 13-30 each piloting cheap remote control vehicles and aircraft with small weapons and a camera attached that they can control from their video game consoles.
    • DeFex, on 09/12/2008, -1/+2US would not play if they cant kill real people.
  • HarleyQuinn, on 09/11/2008, -1/+2Good thing Google's new satellite has such hi-resolution, there will be no fooling us now... heh!
  • voodoochild461, on 09/11/2008, -5/+1We did that 60 years ago in WW2, ZERO originality points for Russia. Stop living in the past.
  • sovietninja, on 09/11/2008, -1/+4Soviet Union only do this to draw attention away from massive incoming Mammoth Tank battalion secretly hidden in ANWR.
    • root1657, on 09/12/2008, -0/+2So we should hide a defense force there... dozens of super-commandos armed with truckloads of anti-tank weapons... maybe we can disguise it as an oil drilling operation...
  • yojiffyskippy, on 09/12/2008, -0/+4I use a similar blow-up prop (okay it's a doll) to drive in the HOV lane..... at least that's what I tell my wife it's for.
  • TeraRealm256, on 09/12/2008, -1/+2we FINALLY found the WMD!!! about *****' time!!!
  • urbandistrict, on 09/12/2008, -1/+4EVERYONE OUT OF THE POOL!!! TAAANKS!!!
  • TeraRealm256, on 09/12/2008, -0/+4I wonder how quick some Homeland Security agent would be at my doorstep if I put an inflatable tank in my backyard...hmm...the april fools day opportunities!!!
  • 13B1303, on 09/12/2008, -0/+3hmm hide real weapons in obviously fake weapons...
  • URnotheonly1, on 09/12/2008, -3/+1Lasers do not reflect back from fake tanks. Real easy to find out
    • whatever01, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1or Synthetic Aperture radar...
      • root1657, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1good point... so maybe these inflatables need a radar reflector inside them so they do show up on radar.... that isnt going to fix the problem with the uniform heat signature though...
    • root1657, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1uh, yeah they do...
    • RipleyIsDead, on 09/12/2008, -0/+4Yes, but radar doesn't reflect off of *stealth tanks*.
  • o0dhacker0o, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1Anyone want to go paintballing?
    I'm pretty sure that's what this is for...
  • BXRWXR, on 09/12/2008, -1/+2Those would be fun for children's parties.
    • cedarbaydave, on 09/12/2008, -1/+4and if the kids are bad, you can put them in the inflatable Kidcentration Camp!
  • leonardutah, on 09/12/2008, -0/+2They look ridiculous close up sure. But if you were a mile or two away and thinking of invading over those hills...
  • DANGERFroggy, on 09/12/2008, -0/+0this is the oldest trick in the book. they did this to distract the germans to think that the allies were going to invade from dover-calais before d-day...
    • cedarbaydave, on 09/12/2008, -1/+1I think the book is older than that. ;-)
  • Christophero, on 09/12/2008, -1/+2Ya know the ironic thing? This type of "technology" is what we thought the WMD were in Iraq...
  • raskolnikov2089, on 09/12/2008, -0/+2It's called maskirovka. It's not anything new. And the russians are very, very good at it.
  • hd95, on 09/12/2008, -1/+4i wonder if you can get inside one and jump around
  • cedarbaydave, on 09/12/2008, -1/+4Why go to war, when you can stay home with your inflatable girlfriend?
  • EvilFerret, on 09/12/2008, -0/+2$25,000.....for that? Oh please tell me the poorly edited/animated lettuce eating the hamburger didn't cost $25k. Maybe it was a misprint and they meant $25?
    • kelsosmythe, on 09/12/2008, -0/+1Pssst..... The thread you're looking for is over there...

      This is the one about inflatable weapons.. not Burger King
  • DeFex, on 09/12/2008, -0/+13some diggers use a similar device to make the neighbors think they have a girlfriend.
    • Archeologist, on 09/12/2008, -0/+3Well played.
    • urgeigh, on 09/12/2008, -0/+6Yeah, I bought some inflatable clean dishes and a stove.
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