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Super Mario Bros. Finally Makes Sense [PIC]

i232.photobucket.com — *****

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  • cdg52, on 06/23/2008, -80/+8Light Bulb!
    • honeymustardn, on 06/24/2008, -0/+2In case anyone was wondering, this is a parody of the explanation behind Giygas from EarthBound image. Unfortunately I don't have a link, but it was just explaining how Giygas is a fetus and they were sent back in time to abort it. The theory was disproved, but an interesting idea nonetheless :)
  • afrojoe60, on 06/23/2008, -64/+15This is what Mario's father told him.
  • akpwnz, on 06/23/2008, -62/+18That pic brought back some memories!
  • ani625, on 06/23/2008, -63/+39And brothers trying to impregnate the same woman.. it all makes sense!
    • carleethian, on 06/24/2008, -5/+11Mario : Peach :: Luigi : Daisy
      • warplayer, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1Daisy isn't in Super Mario Bros. I agree, SMB is a love triangle.
      • chaosblade77, on 07/01/2008, -0/+0In that case we could get a really interesting game based on Luigi kidnapping Peach and killing off his brother. Sure, it may not be canonical but it would be a pretty cool Luigi game unlike Luigi's Mansion which was pretty bland.
  • logan2448, on 06/23/2008, -18/+1862Maybe its just about jumping on ***** turtles.
  • gregsamsa222, on 06/23/2008, -55/+27Perhaps there is no point--the game is actually a meaningless repetition of actions that conditioned an entire generation into believing there is, in fact, an attainable goal at the end of the game. If one does make it to the end of this game, there are many more games after to be played, with more goals to be attained. Mario teaches us, if he teaches us anything, that we are a consumerist culture constantly hoping to be satisfied by our purchases, only to discover that there is yet another purchase coming out in a few weeks.
    • mywhitenoise, on 06/23/2008, -9/+11Your theory makes a hell of a lot more sense than this ***** submission.
      • Amiga500, on 06/24/2008, -2/+12Scientists have confirmed they are both equally *****.
    • LordofChaosIori, on 06/23/2008, -11/+6Anyone stupid enough to think that whoever wrote this was being serious shouldn't be playing the game in the first place.
    • UsablePuddle, on 06/24/2008, -1/+1Deep!
    • warplayer, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1Good point, except you infer that the consumer had no original choice to embrace or reject the product at hand. Or is personal choice and preference just another illusion of the spectacle?

      It's fun over analyzing simple things like Mario, huh?
  • hokeywebb22, on 06/23/2008, -31/+16This message brought to you by the power of marijuana.
    • SeaweedWater, on 06/23/2008, -13/+7 ^ ^
      This comment brought to you by the power of fail.
      • izikdela, on 06/24/2008, -1/+6Buahaha. You fail too! (And probably me pretty soon).

        |/|/007!
  • jimmick, on 06/23/2008, -29/+6Wait, what?
  • Elliottx, on 06/23/2008, -26/+7This life is *****, I'm gonna go play a different one.
  • hinmanj, on 06/23/2008, -21/+3Well our purpose is just to reproduce... just like turtles, and rabbits. So yah, knock the princess up is your goal.
  • rentmitchum, on 06/23/2008, -25/+3I ask the artist.. Just how many pots did you smoke?
    • RockNRollBeaver, on 06/24/2008, -2/+215, He got them from Wal-Mart.....You mean, how much pot did you smoke?
  • soundsofreason, on 06/23/2008, -28/+2And all this time I thought I'd been playing an FPS.
    /sarcasm
  • baylat, on 06/23/2008, -25/+4Fellow filipino !!
  • pitchblack16, on 06/23/2008, -23/+2dugg just for mario
  • WESTEE, on 06/23/2008, -24/+4my god...it all makes sense now
  • Fkb797, on 06/23/2008, -21/+5Well this game certainly had no trouble preventing me from spreading my seed.
  • GhostyBoy, on 06/23/2008, -31/+7These comments suck.
    • fakekevinrose, on 06/24/2008, -3/+5Hahaha, like a typical ***** without an original thought, you expected to get dugg up for that
  • Doomsan, on 06/23/2008, -28/+971that was a ***** pain to read
    • FUR10N, on 06/23/2008, -34/+5not on my dual 22s
      • xkingADROCKx, on 06/24/2008, -1/+47That's quite an e-penis you have there.
      • forceuser, on 06/24/2008, -2/+1I have dual 20s, don't 22s stretch the 1680 x 1050 resolution?
    • Iztikeit, on 06/24/2008, -7/+12He lost me at "Stars symbolize drugs" when, in fact, Mario is constantly eating an amanita muscaria.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amanita_muscaria
    • Rage67, on 06/24/2008, -1/+5I always thought super mario was just a big representation of communism...
      the whole Joseph Stalin look-a-like thing...
      taking down the peace sign at the end of the level to put up a red star....
      but that's just me... haha
    • diggimator, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1Here's the text in text form:

      The worlds in Super Mario Bros. represent our transition from life to death. The coins you collect throughout signify the need for a consistent source of income, the mushrooms the need for sustenance.
      Stars are indicative of a lot of dangers of life, especially drugs, and how invincible they can make you feel.
      The pitfalls are just that, the pitfalls of life, accidents you may unfortunately suffer.
      The fact that the bushes are just recoloured clouds shows a link between the earth and the skies. A reference to the heavens, the final resting place of some religions. This is reinforced by the stairway at the end of each level, i.e. the "stairway to heaven."
      The goal of the game is to rescue the Princess, but for what purpose? The fact is you are trying to impregnate her, simply because many would argue that that is the meaning of life.
      You weren't going to the Mushroom Kingdom to save the Princess, you were going to pass on your seed.

  • seabass341, on 06/23/2008, -20/+2now i understand
  • JlmAWP, on 06/23/2008, -23/+6"The fact that the bushes are just recolored clouds shows a link between the earth and skies. A reference to the heavens..."

    Or, you know, to minimize time and disc space in creating levels. I guess it depends on how you look at it, though.
    • b33b3s, on 06/23/2008, -0/+22Disk? Back in my day we used cartridges!
  • donkeybat64, on 06/23/2008, -26/+2IM SHAKING MY ASS!!
  • elshizzo, on 06/23/2008, -19/+8Add mario to the list of things that get automatically frontpaged regardless of quality.
  • adh3isive, on 06/23/2008, -22/+11Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
  • TheAbdBoy, on 06/23/2008, -32/+395I want what that guy's smoking.
    • yourmightyruler, on 06/24/2008, -12/+7How much do you want?
    • cakerun, on 06/24/2008, -15/+2Sorry. It's illegal. everywhere.
    • Amiga500, on 06/24/2008, -12/+2You want something that sucks all the creativity out of you and inspires you to create something that isn't smart, funny, or creative?
    • winampman2, on 06/24/2008, -4/+2$20 for an ounce?
      • crazycraka, on 06/24/2008, -0/+4Holy ***** ***** you get an oz for $20? Or maybe you dont know wtf your talking about..
      • BlueStreak69, on 06/24/2008, -0/+4It must be shwag.
      • breezytrees, on 06/24/2008, -0/+3It must be parsley.
      • redmyse, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1i think you mean $20 for a gram
      • winampman2, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1Yeah I meant a gram
    • Grolsch, on 06/24/2008, -3/+2Nah its 20-25$ a G these days
    • nomadxx7, on 06/24/2008, -1/+5That reminds me of the part in Grandma's Boy.

      Dante: Wow... where do you get your weed?
      Mr. Cheezle: From you, Dante.
      Dante: Oh... THAT'S RIGHT! What's up, Mr. Cheezle!
    • maroon1872, on 06/24/2008, -1/+2hehe 20 an ounce. hehe shwaggy.
    • slythfox, on 06/24/2008, -1/+1Smoking? Hehe. Sounds like a sober English major to me.
  • MrM1yagi, on 06/23/2008, -57/+598…………………………………………………. __ . __………………
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    • idavidtang, on 06/23/2008, -19/+9Duuh Daah (Mario jumping onto Yoshi).
    • BladeNd64, on 06/23/2008, -32/+7Took me a while to figure out what that was.
    • Phezik, on 06/24/2008, -7/+38LUEshi?
      • fudged71, on 06/24/2008, -4/+3lol. luesers on digg
        hush hush. nobody is supposed to know ;)
    • Tomholius, on 06/24/2008, -14/+47………………………. __ . __………………
      …………………….../’`: : `,---`.„……………
      ……………………../|,-‘`¯¯`(@)_,----,,,_……
      ……... _„_………( `(@),,_/` ¯ : o : : :o `-, …
      *’¯¯¯”, (_,-- ``”~,…. : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : `…..
      ;~··-„,/ (‘` ``)/· ,….,/` : : :_„„,: : : : : : : : : : : …
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      • Hoogs, on 06/24/2008, -4/+44………………………. __ . __………………
        …………………….../’`: : `,---`.„……………
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    • Jushooter, on 06/24/2008, -5/+307ASCII WHAT YOU DID THERE
    • skippy562, on 06/24/2008, -1/+2why are those things soo scary?
    • cdrz, on 06/24/2008, -2/+3clever, very clever

      www.asciipr0n.com
    • hbrtmran, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1alot of time on ur hands i see
  • asskicker32, on 06/23/2008, -22/+6
    I would like to read his interpretation of the original Metal Gear or Bionic Commando.
  • SirKilledAlot55, on 06/23/2008, -19/+6oh i was hoping that this pic would have explained Super Mario Bros. the film to me. as i am still really confused by that "thing"
  • lundeja, on 06/23/2008, -20/+5I recommend a high resolution for attempting to read this one.
  • B08ama, on 06/23/2008, -18/+4Bad description of stars because climbing beanstalks makes me feel high.
  • wayyy, on 06/23/2008, -23/+12Sorry, Peach, my condom's in another castle.
  • frazier117, on 06/23/2008, -20/+5Stars.... Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

  • Lane, on 06/23/2008, -20/+3Deep
  • martinherrera, on 06/23/2008, -18/+7i thought it was about being a bad ass plumber with an epic mustache
  • meleemaster500, on 06/23/2008, -21/+10The true meaning of Giygas (by the same guy)

    http://i232.photobucket.com/albums/ee8/Green-clad_ ...
  • castletech, on 06/23/2008, -22/+10You shouldn't share everything you come up with on acid.
  • Albo23, on 06/23/2008, -15/+5Mario's a pimp.
  • rcFz, on 06/23/2008, -23/+9These comments suck.

    Go ahead, digg me down.
  • NickLee808, on 06/23/2008, -16/+3And all the pipes that you attempt to go down? Inner desires to rummage through sewage. Awesome.
  • Shenaniganz08, on 06/23/2008, -17/+6wow some people read way too into things
    • uglybanana, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1wow some people don't type enough words to complete their sentences.
      • RockNRollBeaver, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1Are you an English teacher?
        /serious
  • wedges, on 06/23/2008, -15/+3the fact that the clouds and bushes are just the same thing recolored represents a link between the earth and the sky? wtf does that even mean?
    • DanMcGuinness, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1I don't know... sounds like some hippie ***** to me.
  • dasamps, on 06/23/2008, -14/+3Or it's just a game.
  • iplen, on 06/23/2008, -22/+4BURY BRIGADE FTW
  • lacreme, on 06/23/2008, -37/+575now no one will ever know that i have a small penis
  • Snoosy, on 06/23/2008, -22/+5Bured for...well...sucking.
  • ShaggyRogers, on 06/23/2008, -56/+489I never even noticed that the bushes were recolored clouds...
    • alothrop, on 06/23/2008, -6/+300or is it the clouds that are recolored bushes?!
      • psg188, on 06/23/2008, -5/+83You'll never look at anything the same way ever again.
      • Hoogs, on 06/24/2008, -12/+6Hoooooly shi...
      • Shaem1, on 06/24/2008, -6/+46or is it the recoloured that are bushes cloud?!
      • ProTeamOtto, on 06/24/2008, -3/+3Touche...
      • hotpuck6, on 06/24/2008, -1/+4well, consider my mind blown.
      • freshgrease, on 06/24/2008, -1/+1And now a debate to rival the debate over who is better: Picard or Kirk
      • FadieZ, on 06/24/2008, -0/+2Translated into RL: Did God create man or did man create GodÉ
    • mediaspree, on 06/23/2008, -17/+132You must be new on digg. A story about them gets front paged every week.
    • UltraDavid, on 06/24/2008, -18/+6Whoaa... like... duuude, bro...
    • Amiga500, on 06/24/2008, -11/+9Being sober adds a new dimension to life, doesn't it?
    • Jablinsk, on 06/24/2008, -1/+9sadly, this is the only thing I found amusing in this article
    • SpeedSteamBoat, on 06/24/2008, -0/+49I never noticed how short the first level of SMB was.... ;_;
      • Jewishbob, on 06/24/2008, -6/+2That means you never beat the first level?
    • GoldYoshi, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1"Once you see it, you'll ***** bricks"


      Or coins...
    • hypnotoad32, on 06/25/2008, -0/+2Then I've got some bad news for you about Sub Zero and Scorpion...
  • skeletorcares, on 06/23/2008, -23/+4Star = Drugs, huh?

    I don't see any consequences.In the game, you get a star then kill a whole bunch of living things, then get points for it. If you did this in real life with star replaced with drugs, a common person would be reprimanded for this; if not legally, or criminally, at least psychologically.

    It sounds more like stars represent positions that can kill anything without consequences. A couple positions that come to mind are, US president, and people associated with slaughter houses. Kill a whole bunch of *****. Get a big ole paycheck.
    • yellowswan, on 06/23/2008, -2/+2In using the power star I find that the player can (and most often does) grow hubristic to the dangers in the game, becoming careless and rash, thereby endangering his livelihood (powerups) and (in extreme cases) his life. Much like drugs, right?
      • skeletorcares, on 06/24/2008, -2/+1If he said 'meth' I'd agree.
        If he said 'pot' i'd whole-heartily disagree.
        But just 'drugs' is not an apt enough analogy for me.

        Would cough syrup do it? maybe. Tylenol? probably not. Viagra... maybe... Crack? Yeah. Prozac? Diarrhea drugs? Athletes foot powder? Does that make you careless and rash? Nope! It makes you careful and rash-less. ;-)

        You can't just sum up 'drugs' as bad. At least not as tactless as that.
  • Eucolastic, on 06/23/2008, -23/+2ITS A ***** GOOD GAEM
    • uglybanana, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1I think you smoked one too many stars
  • Tyrghast, on 06/23/2008, -17/+4When you're thinking that deeply you're usually too high to play...
    • ryleyleckie, on 06/23/2008, -1/+15i'm sorry but you're never too high to play mario.
  • crimsonryno, on 06/23/2008, -36/+6Bet you can't bury me!
    • 0Xonox0, on 06/23/2008, -12/+2***** has been buried.
      • georgemason01, on 06/24/2008, -10/+2Two assholes have been buried.
        • Shaem1, on 06/24/2008, -11/+1Three assholes have been buried.
        • metaliq, on 06/24/2008, -8/+2Five assholes have been buried.
        • SourSlurpee, on 06/24/2008, -1/+7At least 100 assholes have been buried.
        • Jashro, on 06/24/2008, -0/+7All the assholes on digg have been buried, except for the ones that weren't.
  • zushiba, on 06/23/2008, -10/+2Oh god, what have I done with my life. I've impregnated no princesses :(
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