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The Ten Best Bands That Never Existed

earvolution.com — Some of the bands on this list never produced one note of audible music, others needed real musicians to give them voice, a couple served as alter egos and one band is made up of puppets. Regardless of their corporeal status, in one form or another, these bands embodied the ethos of rock and roll.

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  • CaptainNoPants, on 10/10/2007, -1/+45Alvin and the Chipmunks and School of Rock, but no Wyld Stallyns? Garbage.
  • SolsPolaris, on 10/10/2007, -16/+1419eater.com is the best resource
  • Abyss_908, on 10/10/2007, -3/+8Spinal Tap actually has played a few concerts in real life, so I would say that they do exist.
    • MrBabyMan, on 10/10/2007, -1/+4That would be one of the couple that "served as alter egos" in the description.
    • TheDragon, on 10/10/2007, -0/+10Well, Hedwig and the Angry Inch started as a stage show... That's live performance. The Blues Brothers have played plenty of live shows and as recently as five years ago had played shows at the house of blues (With just Dan Aykroyd.)

      And no one can convince me Dr. Teeth isn't real. >_<
    • turrican, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Seconded - I saw them play at the Greek Theater in Los Angeles in 2001 (they opened for themselves, even - as "the Folksmen")
      http://www.roughedge.com/live/spinaltap0601.htm
  • twrife, on 10/10/2007, -9/+3I was wondering why I hadn't heard of many of these, then I read the title again and saw the 'n' in the word never.
    • Baelorn, on 10/10/2007, -0/+0Easy mistake when every other Digg article contains "The Best ... EVER" xD
  • shorty9, on 10/10/2007, -15/+1Meh. Nothing on Deep Purple
    http://www.hooqs.com/deep-purple/17021,22027
  • qwerty1024, on 10/10/2007, -0/+28I kinda liked the B-Sharps
  • MikeonTV, on 10/10/2007, -6/+25No Nickelback?
  • sbader, on 10/10/2007, -2/+32Lame.. no Deathklok
    • Balanced, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1They've got an album coming out soon, I hear.
    • claireskitten, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2Dethklok NEEDS to be one here. They have a song on Guitar Hero, they MUST be awesome.
    • smackhero, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2dethklok and mc pee pants/sir loin/little brittle are definitely my 2 favorite made up artists. i'm actually looking forward to a dethklok album.
    • bomb288, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1agreed.
      the author of this article should go into the water, and you know the rest
  • Chewie67, on 10/10/2007, -1/+5Steel Dragon?

    Stillwater?
  • bightchee, on 10/10/2007, -1/+5Dugg for Billy & The Boingers.
    • navitatl, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1That and the American Medical Association made my day. Those are two fictional bands you don't expect to see referenced often.
      Everyone, read the Illuminatus! Trilogy. It's a fantastic piece of literature.
  • the6thReplicant, on 10/10/2007, -1/+7Buckaroo Banzai ??
  • jun2san, on 10/10/2007, -1/+10***** this list for not having Stillwater.
  • nihility, on 10/10/2007, -0/+37A top ten list that was all on one page? Incredible.
  • 0perator, on 10/10/2007, -0/+22What about The Beets!?
  • jcm267, on 10/10/2007, -10/+3Buried for School of Rock.
  • actionmann50, on 10/10/2007, -0/+18Honorable Mention to The Lone Rangers of "Airheads" fame? Brendan Fraser, Adam Sandler, and Steve Buscemi were the band members...
    • distort83, on 10/10/2007, -1/+0ha! forgot about hat movie. it's interesting that the lone rangers song was actually a Reagan Youth song, written by the guitarist.
    • distort83, on 10/10/2007, -1/+0ha! forgot about hat movie. it's interesting that the lone rangers song was actually a Reagan Youth song, written by the guitarist.
  • themurph2099, on 10/10/2007, -1/+23Spinal Tap does exist. They have played concerts in real life. They played at LiveEarth just recently. They also wrote their own music, sang their own vocals, and played their own instruments. Hell, they exist MORE than most of the bands on the radio.
    • themarq, on 10/10/2007, -1/+4True, but Derek Smalls, Nigel Tuffnel, and David St Hubbins are not real people, the are alter egos of Christopher Guest, Harry Shearer and Michael McKean.
  • petoria, on 10/10/2007, -1/+6no Love Burger?
  • thebenchase, on 10/10/2007, -5/+5Blues Brothers not # 1? Buried.
    • madtaco, on 10/10/2007, -4/+0They perform all the time.
    • Balanced, on 10/10/2007, -1/+4They played several 'real'' concerts. While Belushi was alive, of course.
    • illpacin0, on 10/10/2007, -1/+3The Blues Brothers did exist. They did shows, and put out at least one album.
    • mrswirl, on 10/10/2007, -0/+4However, as pointed out above, Jake and Elwood are the alter egos of Belushi and Akroyd. Same concept as Spinal Tap. They should be #1 though.
    • TheKricket, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1but again, read the article - alter egos people - jake and elwood didnt really exist...
  • traldan, on 10/10/2007, -2/+2Site down, not even 100 diggs.

    Lame.
  • VocalFX, on 10/10/2007, -4/+5Seems like people will digg any garbage MrBabyMan throws at us.
  • carvsdriver, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Mirror anyone? That ***** didn't last long.
  • in2deep, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1If they have never existed then how do you know they are the best 10?
  • fuzzynyanko, on 10/10/2007, -0/+4Dr. Teeth was awesome. Too bad they got rid of him
    • BevansDesign, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Why did they get rid of Dr. Teeth, anyway?
      • JustinCase18, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1After they had to put Animal down and the Hippie chick came down with hepatitis, the group kind of fell apart.

        (See Robot Chicken for more details.)
  • groverwood, on 10/10/2007, -0/+0any mirror?
  • ostracize, on 10/10/2007, -2/+13Bang on for Electric Mayhem. They defined every 70s acid-trip band around:
    Floyd: We am, is, are and be they whom as are known as the Electric Mayhem!
    (The Electric Mayhem laughs their agreement)
    Janice: For shurely!
    Floyd: He's Dr. Teeth!
    Dr. Teeth: Golden teeth and golden tones. Welcome to my presence! (laughs)
    Fozzie: Thank you.
    Kermit: Fozzie...
    Floyd: I'm Floyd, I blow bass.
    Zoot: And I'm... uh... um...
    Floyd: Zoot. Sax is your axe. Uh-oh, Zoot skipped a groove again!
    Janice: Oh, wow, like I'm Janice on lead guitar, for shurely.
    Animal: RARRRGHHHH!
    Floyd: Oh yeah, that's Animal! Show them what you do, Animal!
    Animal: I want to--eat drums! Rarrgh! Rarrgh! (does so)
    Dr.Teeth: No! Beat drums, beat drums!
    (Animal stops attempting to eat his cymbal)
    Animal: Beat drums! Beat drums! (does so)
    Floyd: Down Animal!
    Animal: Down!
    Floyd: Back!
    Animal: Back!
    Floyd: Sit!
    Animal: Sit!

    Unfortunate how it all ended:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t74nvQrHEYQ
  • Glansbourg, on 10/10/2007, -0/+0...and where is Stool on this list?
  • NullzipZero, on 10/10/2007, -1/+3Hedwig And The Angry Inch is a funny film.
    if you are curious http://youtube.com/watch?v=hgz_vgtJS-E
  • floydhead01, on 10/10/2007, -0/+0Google Cache - http://64.233.169.104/search?q=cache:QNK2hgTXq6AJ:www.earvolution.com/2007/07/ten-best-bands-that-never-existed.asp+ten-best-bands-that-never-existed.asp&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=us&client=firefox-a
  • MidiAmin, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2#7: The J.A.M.M. = American Medical Association? Huh?
    (The J.A.M.M. = The KLF, who are definitely a real band.)
    • Tippis, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2Yes, but considering how many different names KLF went through, it's hard to keep track at times ;)
  • boyinshortpants, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Not a bad list, but it's missing Bad News! Much like spinal tap, but funnier
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bad_News
  • elsux0r, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3Dugg for Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem.
  • lukeamotion, on 10/10/2007, -1/+7No Zack Attack? With hits like "Friends Forever," how could the gang not be on here? Buried for inaccuracy. Luke
  • QaSpel, on 10/10/2007, -1/+2Old stuff, but then, so is most of the list.

    The Monkees
    The Partridge Family
    • VitriolAndAngst, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2Why would anyone digg this down?

      And, I think you could actually listen to The Monkees music (not the Partidge -- blech!) The Monkees had some of the best musicians of their day writing their songs. They actually got a following and started touring a bit to packed crowds -- totally proving the point that you could create sensations like the Spice Girls.

      Was this a nonsense list -- they mentioned fake bands that Rocked.

      The Monkees would obviously beat Alvin and the Chipmonks, which was played to annoy people.
    • spootmonkey, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3The Monkees were a real band...so they don't belong on this list at all.
      • Oracle95, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1as were, whether or not you like them now, the Partridge Family. The group stopped touring after a girl got trampled to death in a concert. (Kind of hard to pull off in a TV studio)
  • cmiller1, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1The Beats? Polaris? (although they were kind of in the form of miracle legion) What about the green tentacles band?
  • evilregis, on 10/10/2007, -1/+2As a Canadian, I would like to nominate famous the famous band hailing from Dog River: Thunderface... or was it Thunderchuck's. Rumblepuss?
  • Californication, on 10/10/2007, -0/+0"Service Unavailable" WOULD be a good name for a rock band!
  • jackmaht, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2This list never existed just like the website. Mirror?
  • vladthedecker, on 10/10/2007, -1/+4What no Eddie and the Cruisers?
    • fnaqzna, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2You mean "John Cafferty and the Beaver Brown Band"?
  • gtluke, on 10/10/2007, -1/+3lone rangers?
  • ScottG, on 10/10/2007, -1/+2Ten..........

    but this one goes to 11
  • drakenlot, on 10/10/2007, -2/+8What about Gorillaz? They released albums yes, but they don't actually exist. There are no real band members, just the comic/animated version. Would've been buried, but saved for mentioning Blues Brothers and Electric Mayhem.

    Though BB did exist, I was at a concert they did.
  • wolvyne, on 10/10/2007, -0/+11I gotta say the lack of Dethklok is very disappointing...
  • thomasoa, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1Hedwig and the Angry Inch rules
  • tical2756, on 10/10/2007, -1/+8Where's the Soggy Bottom Boys
  • cuoops, on 10/10/2007, -0/+4Mrs. Tarantino: Are you the police?
    Elwood: No, ma'am. We're musicians.

    It's sad the John died, but they played many gigs. The live album, from when they opened up for Steve Martin, is one of the best selling blues albums of all time.
  • petebot, on 10/10/2007, -0/+0Armada?
  • heidavey, on 10/10/2007, -4/+2Logged in just to bury.

    What a crock of ****!

    School of rock?!
    Alvin and the chipmunks embodied rock and roll?!
    Blues brothers were a real band!
    Spinal recorded an album and plyed several gigs after the popularity of the film.
    And no Wyld Stallyns! wtf
    • VitriolAndAngst, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1You are right -- they missed Wyld Stallyns!

      They got maybe 5 on that list that should stay.
  • kingyubba, on 10/10/2007, -0/+6what about Sexual Chocolate?
  • commiecat, on 10/10/2007, -0/+4N.W.H. -- Niggas With Hats.
    • superguysteve, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Cup yo' hands and cover up,
      NWH says "grab your stuff!"
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