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197 Comments
- Diggnabbit, on 08/22/2008, -1/+114Microsoft Patents Ones, Zeroes
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29130 - zeebo, on 08/22/2008, -3/+112Well at least we finally know what patent Microsoft has that they keep accusing linux of infringing upon.
- inactive, on 08/22/2008, -1/+69I just got the space bar patented guys!
- arunforce, on 08/22/2008, -0/+48I remember when patents use to actually be about inventions.
... Actually, no I don't. - Caligatio, on 08/22/2008, -4/+50I'm guessing it will be tossed out based on prior art... but come on now.
I...hate...software patents - louiebaur, on 08/22/2008, -4/+46Is this for real? I think this article should be placed in comedy. This is just plain funny!!!
- inactive, on 08/28/2008, -1/+40outrage?
THIS… IS… THE ONION!!!!!! - inactive, on 08/28/2008, -3/+40i used my page up and page down buttons to read that. take that, microsoft!
- talonstriker, on 08/22/2008, -0/+37wait_will_I_get_sued_if_I_use_the_space_bar?
- abran1984, on 08/22/2008, -10/+46Don't pretend Apple is any better
- Zounas, on 08/22/2008, -5/+35When was that?
- HonoredMule, on 08/22/2008, -0/+29I see you are using my patented "Method for representing words without whitespace by substituting underlined space characters to divide word-tokens."
You must cease and desist immediately. - StormyAaron, on 08/22/2008, -3/+31What the... how the.....has any one from the PTO even seen a keyboard?!
- IphtashuFitz, on 08/22/2008, -2/+29Damn the US patent system sucks!
- sumdog, on 08/22/2008, -3/+30hip and innovative? WTF are you on?
- zoodoo12, on 08/22/2008, -1/+26their?
- derble, on 08/22/2008, -2/+23In order to see this comment you have to go through Microsoft. (or just scroll)
- laminac, on 08/22/2008, -3/+21A lot of Microsoft patents are fairly obvious, but the meat of the patent is actually in the claims. These are just descriptions. For example microsoft has a patent on making a dll that does something obvious, but part of the patent is the name which is very unique. They did this to try to prevent people from re-implementing their dlls for Windows. The workaround is obvious (re-name the dll and you avoid infringing the patent) but it won't be a suitable substitue to use for Windows specifically.
The people in the patent office are not idiots like many people like to believe. Odds are there is something in this patent that is very narrow in scope as opposed to the broadness that the reporter is trying to convey. - punkcat, on 08/22/2008, -0/+18scroll you say? that gives me an idea for my next patent.
- BoneStamp, on 08/22/2008, -1/+18...which also works as page down in your web browser (when your cursor is not in a text field of course).
- thunderforce, on 08/22/2008, -0/+15But did you patent just the space bar or the caracter itself?
What about tabs? - inactive, on 08/22/2008, -0/+15I just counted 20 spaces. I will send an invoice for $0.10.
- Charles07v, on 08/22/2008, -5/+18Anyone else think its odd that the patent number ends in 666?
- punkcat, on 08/22/2008, -1/+14gd dmn y
- inactive, on 08/22/2008, -0/+13up is dn upside down
- GregFD3S, on 08/22/2008, -0/+13Don't you mean "pig up"?
"To Start Press Any Key".
"Where's the ANY key? I see Esk, Catarl, and Pig-Up.
There doesn't seem to be any ANY key.
Woo! All this computer hacking is making me thirsty. I think I'll order a TAB." - latrosicarius, on 08/22/2008, -1/+13They're just as closed source. Pisses the hell out of me
- topopardo, on 08/22/2008, -2/+13Not that I want to defend M$, but the patent reads "In one implementation, pressing a Page Down or Page Up keyboard key/button allows a user to begin at any starting vertical location within a page, and navigate to that same location on the next or previous page"
I'm not sure if Microsoft really invented that, but it's not the PgUp-PgDown keys. It's referring to the ability to jump to the next page, exactly to the same line which you are on right now. Remember when, some years ago, PgDn always sent you to the top of the next page, not to the middle or the bottom?
As said before, I don't know if that's genuine of Microsoft, but the patent isn't really obvious. I hate software patents, anyway, just wanted to throw some light here. - afruff23, on 08/22/2008, -1/+11*****/you!
- LeviTheSmith, on 08/22/2008, -2/+12I just patented A E I O U
- Eldoo77, on 08/22/2008, -0/+10That will $253.75 for the right to use those buttons.
- Kamujin, on 08/22/2008, -2/+11I truely LOL'd.
Well said. - yetAnotherCroc, on 08/22/2008, -0/+9I did not know that. Thanx!
- Atomic1fire, on 08/22/2008, -0/+9exceptyoujustusedspacebarimsurethatotherguywontbehappy
- principle, on 08/22/2008, -9/+18This is unbelievable! Especially, after the recent US Supreme Court ruling in KSR International v. Teleflex, that if used against you will prevent you from getting a patent no matter what it is. However, if you are M$, then PTO will rubberstamp your applications as fest as you can file them.
- forevernomad, on 08/22/2008, -0/+8ihavepatentedtheuniqueorderofcharactersthatmakeupyour
usernames
moneynowplease
alsoihavepatentedtheconceptofhavingakeystrokeforcreatinganew
line
thatshouldaboutcoverit
damnitshardtryingnottohitthespacebar
helioxcanigetadiscountifibulkbuyspacebarpresses - BoneStamp, on 08/22/2008, -0/+8@heliox
I think this keyboard was made pre-spacebar patent... so I'm going to argue grandfather status for this thing while you defer my unpaid invoice to collections. - HonoredMule, on 08/22/2008, -1/+9Wouldn't dream of it.
- logandurand, on 08/22/2008, -0/+7Seems even to me.
- Dumbledorito, on 08/22/2008, -1/+8Is there a patent for "Scroll Lock?" I want to read what it does, beyond making a little light go on when I pres it.
- DaviDTC, on 08/22/2008, -1/+8Ihateyou.Anyonehaveperiodyet?Whataboutquestionmark?
- identitymatrix, on 08/22/2008, -1/+8"Method and system for navigating paginated content in page-based increments"
Hmmm.... That highly sophisticated high-tech computer system sounds like .... a book!
A book is a method and system for navigating paginated content in page-based increments.
No wonder the patent reviewers granted Microsoft this patent: They clearly have never heard of the concept of a book before, much less read books and become literate.
I guess I'll have to throw away all my books now, as I'm able to navigate their content by turning pages, which is a system of navigating paginated content in page-based increments.
Why so serious? Who actually takes software patents seriously anymore? - bratterscain, on 08/22/2008, -0/+7Agreed. This pettiness of this pissed me off at first but if you think about it, if someone else patented this, MS would have to stop using it or risk getting sued to hell.
- arjie, on 08/22/2008, -0/+6Really? I'm pretty sure unpatented prior art invalidates a patent.
- TalksInMaths, on 08/22/2008, -2/+8I wanted to submit a comment but the "Save Comment" button has just been patented and I can't afford the fees
:) - tinkafoo, on 08/22/2008, -0/+6IBM beat them to it -- long before Microsoft existed:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ISPF - coyote1284, on 08/22/2008, -0/+6I'm sure Nintendo had a patent on the N64 controller, but that didn't stop some ***** from filing a patent for a "Remote Controller with Analog Button", 4 years *after* the release of the system, just to use it, and several other dodgy patents, to litigte himself into early retirement by suing Sony, Microsoft, and Nintendo a couple months ago.
- serif69, on 08/22/2008, -2/+8I remember when "use to" used to be "used to".
- Slade605, on 08/22/2008, -1/+7I feel caring, I buried you so no one else has to see your comment....
- wildkats74, on 08/22/2008, -0/+6but .. but are you trying to say we can't trust reporters or journalists!!??
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