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Nokia bans the word 'phone'

seattletimes.nwsource.com — We are forbidden to call them phones," said the vice president of multimedia strategy and business development (of Nokia, the world's largest 'phone' maker). Instead, they're "multimedia computers."

Who dugg this? Made popular May 16, 2006

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  • johndi, on 10/12/2007, -2/+65No, they will now be called multimedia interlocutions. Have some cod liver oil
  • HarryBauzonia, on 10/12/2007, -1/+47Can I make a phone call on one?
  • DoubtfulSalmon, on 10/12/2007, -0/+31It's a common request nowadays - my internal customers come to me for advice on what phone to buy. I ask them do they have any particular features in mind. Invariably they say "Yes, I want to make phone calls on it".

    It's sad when things get to the point that you need to specify "making telephone calls" as a required feature on a "telephone".
  • xst4t1kx, on 10/12/2007, -1/+25In other news: media forbidden from refering to Nokia VP as anything but asshat.
  • nathos, on 10/12/2007, -4/+28phone phone phone
  • lemorex, on 10/12/2007, -7/+31Sony bans the word "plagiarism"
  • renegade334, on 10/12/2007, -0/+19Yeah it's crazy huh, I was looking through the features of my "multimedia computer" today and I noticed it had the ability to transfer your voice digitally over a series of cell towers and satellites to someone else's "multimedia computer" or to there home "multimedia computer". I was shocked! no need for 3G enabled MSN Messenger anymore!!!
  • volcompimp, on 10/12/2007, -0/+19He's right... They aren't phones. Phone's have good battery life and don't have crappy menu systems.
  • jeblis, on 10/12/2007, -3/+20This is exactly why my last nokia phone was my last one. Too bloated, too big, too slow. Seems like they lost the point that this is a phone first and foremost.

    My speedy little samsung with a simple interface makes for a better experience.
  • renegade334, on 10/12/2007, -3/+19Speaking of PDA's, reports from Microsoft suggest you can no longer call your PDA a PDA or IPAQ or POCKET PC or AXIM or TUNGSTEN, You must call it your Microsoft Window Mobile 5 Powered Device With Pocket Office. Otherwise you face fines of up to $12,000

    I've always liked my HP branded "Microsoft Window Mobile 5 Powered Device With Pocket Office" Model IPAQ 2210.
  • AeonTorpor, on 10/12/2007, -6/+19@Virtualtaco

    Testing... Shut the hell up.
  • positron, on 10/12/2007, -0/+13Portable
    Hi-fidelity
    Oral
    Networking
    Equipment
  • Virtualtaco, on 10/12/2007, -5/+16If I have 5 friends over in my room... and I ask if anyone has seen my "multimedia computer"... I am going to see 5 fingers point in 5 different directions...

    Thanks a lot... *****.
  • Dimensio, on 10/12/2007, -0/+10I suppose that I will not be purchasing from Nokia in the near future. I just want a phone.
  • DoctorShim, on 10/12/2007, -0/+9Someone should ban Caps Lock.
  • omnithought, on 10/12/2007, -4/+13*****. They're phones. Eat me, Nokia.

    Hey, it had to be said.
  • burke, on 10/12/2007, -2/+11That's all well and good, but this is akin to Nintendo insisting they no longer make games, but rather intereractive multimedia experiences, and enforcing a rule that if you so much as think the work 'game', you'll be tarred, feathered, and shot.
  • nofunnyshtuff, on 10/12/2007, -0/+9ET communicate via multimedia computer-device home. I feel like there is something lacking here.
  • Mr.Glass, on 10/12/2007, -1/+10if its a computer, i want a keyboard and mouse.
  • verstohlen, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6That's fine. I just banned the word "Nokia".
  • AeonTorpor, on 10/12/2007, -3/+9I think half of the fun in tarring and feathering someone is to light them on fire afterward... I may be a little rusty on my torture techniques though.
  • mancat, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5Portable Integrated Digital Wireless Internetworked Multimedia Communications Personal Computer System.
  • DoubtfulSalmon, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5phone you and the horse you rode in on, you phoning phone!
  • aplusplus, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4I wish they'd call them Talking Computers instead. That could lead to some interesting conversations.
  • Antz0rz, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4Yes, I call my watch an Automated Time Telling Device, too.

    What a load of marketing *****.
  • AeonTorpor, on 10/12/2007, -1/+5@PaulOwen

    Low-profit data charges, my ass. Have you even seen the prices they charge for data transfer?
  • inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3hey, don't flame, he's got a point! Sony doesn't just copy ideas in the videogame realm, they also do it in the consumer electronics realm. It's nothing new!
  • duality, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3"Already, it dominates the wireless business, producing about a third of the 800 million mobile phones sold around the world every year. Contrast that with Dell, the world's largest computer maker, which last year shipped a fraction of that -- 37 million units."

    That's like comparing apples and coconuts, if you ask me. A computer is much different from a.....multimedia computer?

    I'll be right back. I need to make a multimedia computer call.
  • Valence, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3Bleh. This is just some internal thing, meant to drive perception within the organization. It's just a Nokia business rule and not much of a story. People still get things "xeroxed". News still comes over "the wire". We still use "personal computers" aka "PCs" (even though everyone's connected to the Internet, which will still probably be called that 100 years from now when we're sending emails to Uncle John and Aunt Peg on Mars) and people still drive "automobiles". Auto. Mobile. Old word, still there. Tomorrow, I'm going to place some "calls". On my "phone".
  • samdu, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3"I can hear it now...
    "Hey Babe can I get your multimedia computer number?""

    Either way the answer's still, "No!" :P
  • tommorris, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3You all kid, but I might as well call mine a "pocket Bluetooth modem with optional voice features". I'm paying about the same as what I used to pay in the dark days of dial-up to access the 'net while on the train. It spends most of its clock cycles and radio signals modulating and demodulating data from my laptop, the remainder being "idle" and "brief calls in an emergency".

    It has the nice upshot which is that I'm not a total a-hole on the train by talking at the top of my voice but almost silently tapping in to my email client. Cost to phone person and annoy my fellow passengers is about £0.50ish. Cost to send them an email is maybe a few pence.

    My phone isn't really a phone, but it isn't a multimedia computer either. The extent of the multimedia is occasionally taking photos of stupid crap and slowly transferring them off via Bluetooth, and being able to load MIDI files on and listen to how rubbish they sound. Oh, and a few naff games. None of which should put them off the more important tasks - making the batteries last longer, making the Bluetooth headsets look less obnoxious and finding a way of getting 3G cheaper (and get them to work in tunnels - maybe). This is stupid marketing, but it has a kernel of truth to it, especially here in the UK where the vast majority of people use SMS (or GPRS/3G net connections). From a business point-of-view, voice has become a commodity. I mean, what else can they do - stereophonic sound? Digital surround sound? Seriously - we have reached a point where not much more can be done with the voice side of the GSM/3G networks.

    From an American perspective, it sounds silly, but you have to remember: in Europe, the market for non-voice (SMS and data) is far, far bigger than it is for voice. In fact, the phone I used to have didn't even have a microphone or speaker built in - you had to attach a handsfree kit (Google for "motorola v100" or "motorola v.box"; before you ask, it wasn't a particularly good phone, but I got it on special offer).
  • umedone, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3When I was at a job interview at Nokia they told me all about this. I said that it confuses people and creates just a lot of resistance (like here at Digg), a phone is a phone if it looks like a phone. Change the design and the representation might change. Like with the 770. ok, the name internet tablet is kinda wack but still its not a phone anymore. Anyway, I got the job. There is a lot of talking going around wheter "multimedia computer" is the right way to call it or not. The main point being that the current models are more than just "phones". So, if you came up with a better description than "multimedia computer" (and I'm sure that you can..) just bring it on :)...
  • Tiabin, on 10/12/2007, -2/+5Yeah, I can't believe how serious people take some of this corporate fanaticism. lol.

    The only corporation I'm still in love with is google. (Even as much as people bitch about it... I can't FATHOM using MSN/YAHOO. My love stays with google.)
  • betasp, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3How 'bout "phone that does other crap... not very well..."
  • Llan, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3Ah that would be nice, working at such a firm. Or is it forbidden to say firm, is it institution there? :)
  • PaulOwen, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4jayf, your argument doesn't make sense. Vodaphone (which is not a stock-holding company so isn't a K. K.) should be gaining market share according to your logic.

    Anyway, Panasonic, NEC and Fujitsu make most of the phones in Japan. Nokia never were really important in the Japanese market.
  • silverash, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3There are already multimedia computers. If they want to call them anything but a phone it should be 'multimedia communication computers' or something to that effect.
  • beelz, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3"multimedia computers." .. i like PDA better then MC
  • RobotCitizen, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2"why is it they think semantics will fix the problem?"

    It works for the government, doesn't it?
  • PaulOwen, on 10/12/2007, -2/+4Eventually, Skype-enabling will reduce the "phone" function to a software application.

    Nokia, Sony-Erricson, NEC, Sagem and the other handset comapnies are already dead in the water by their business model. The more Internet-ready they make their phones, the more they allow their users access to cheap VOIP, leaving them to fight over low-cost, low-profit data charges only.
  • Vician, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2When was the last time you ever had anyone just try to sell you a phone? If they aren't telling me the thing can get movies from magic, it's how it could get reception from space! (Nevermind the fact the bar is low just outside the store... it's all that magic going on)
  • sofa0ne, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2I can hear it now...
    "Hey Babe can I get your multimedia computer number?"

    When companies are striving to think different and "outside the box" why is it they think semantics will fix the problem? .sigh...
  • jayf, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Sorry PaulOwen but Vodafone is a K.K.
    (see bottom right of their page: http://www.vodafone.jp/top.htm)

    Vodafone UK pushes 3G European handsets from Nokia and Motorola onto the Japanese market and gives them center display beside those from Sharp and Toshiba.

    Panasonic, NEC and Fujitsu are big on DoCoMo as you mention but only NEC offers Vodafone handsets. Panasonic is now getting in on the action again however.

    Here's a recent article about the new Apple iPhone and Vodafone/Softbank's woes due to European handsets... http://www.itwire.com.au/content/view/4287/127/
  • TheJenks, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2How do these people get jobs? They really have no idea.
  • mikeazorin, on 10/12/2007, -3/+5"multimedia computers."

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
  • jodamiller, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Leave it to a corporate VP to change the name of a one-syllable word to an eight-syllable word. That's going to roll right off the tongue.
  • samdu, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Ahhh, corporate euphemisms. Gotta love it. (sigh)
  • eosp, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Read the effing post. He said he got the job.
  • eosp, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1In Soviet Finland?
  • pbrooks100, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1"Nokia is affecting a paradigm shift. Inital customer reluctance will be a non-issue."

    [Harry Santamäki's Motorola SLVR multimedia computer "rings].

    "I can't talk on the multimedia computer right now, I affecting a paradigm shift in the computing technology arena." [pause] "Yes dear, I'll call your mother and say happy birthday... as soon as I can find a dang PHONE!"
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