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Compaq FAQ: Where do I find the "Any" key on my keyboard?

9.compaq.com — This is the real FAQ from Compaq

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  • noamsml, on 10/12/2007, -1/+83Thanks, I was always wondering about that one!
    • Software2, on 10/12/2007, -2/+55The thing is, Compaq actually had an "any" key on one of their models in the 80's.
    • i440, on 10/12/2007, -5/+25You technologically literate people laugh and scorn, but you must realize that some people new to computers don't even know what a CPU is, for instance.

      Now, how do I press F1 without a keyboard again?
    • Four20, on 10/12/2007, -3/+21mmmm, tab
      *drools
    • Yez70, on 10/12/2007, -2/+40My brother can't find the 'Return' key on his keyboard - because it is labeled 'Enter.'

      He has used my laptop and is totally lost as it has no "return' or 'Enter' key - just a down to the right arrow symbol.

      People are way too literal - and stupid - nowadays.
    • krizazy, on 10/12/2007, -3/+25@Yez70

      Down and to the right? You mean left? Or is there a new "enter" symbol that I've yet to encounter.
    • exabytes18, on 10/12/2007, -4/+14krizazy is correct. Since when has the enter key had a "down and to the right" symbol? It looks like some diggers don't know their right from their left. :-P
    • wibblewibble, on 10/12/2007, -0/+16Does anybody have a picture of the Any key on the old Compaq models?
    • SeBBBe, on 10/12/2007, -0/+10"You technologically literate people laugh and scorn, but you must realize that some people new to computers don't even know what a CPU is, for instance."

      I wouldnt consider the word "any" to be technical... Any key means, well, ANY key...
    • bruenig, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2The lack of the article 'the' should indicate that it is not talking about a specific key. No one would say hit enter key, but instead hit the enter key. People not knowing this are stupid, they are not non technical. Learn some basic english syntax.
    • grapfx, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2I always told the folks who have asked this question. it's ALT + F4. Then I walk away slowly until I am out of site then run away laughing!!!!!
  • BadassCheese, on 10/12/2007, -2/+38For those of you too lazy to click, it's right in between the Johnson rod and the retro incubator.
    • jcembree, on 10/12/2007, -58/+4"The term "any key" does not refer to a particular key on the keyboard. It simply means to strike any one of the keys on your keyboard or handheld screen."
    • Al3x, on 10/12/2007, -1/+36Just near the flux capacitor right?
    • MetricLobster, on 10/12/2007, -2/+21I had my flux capacitor removed.... i saw a CNN indepth report that it gives off this strange radiation that will make your left nut shrink (your right nut will be fine... they said right and left are affected by different types of radiation)
  • SayAnything, on 10/12/2007, -4/+51Homer: "To start press any key. Where's the any key? I see esk, katarl, pig up. There doesn't seem to be any any key! All of this computer hacking is making me thristy, I think I'll order a Tab." http://www.allsimps.com/index.php?id=7&season=7
  • trickrick1985, on 10/12/2007, -6/+49The answer to the question in the FAQ should just say "***** you."
    • Amplix, on 10/12/2007, -0/+15I would have gone with something a little more on the lines of

      "You are too stupid to own a computer" and then go on to tell him what he should do with the computer
    • xxx420xxx, on 10/12/2007, -12/+3@trickrick1985 hahaha you're damn right

      @Amplix way too P.R.. Go back to ***** (pun) school
  • JoshHendo, on 10/12/2007, -1/+65Created: 10/8/2001 2:13:42 AM
    Modified: 10/25/2002 11:07:05 AM

    What changed?
  • cubiculum, on 10/12/2007, -14/+4Yeah, this is pretty old... surprised a lot of people haven't seen it yet.
    • Anorhc, on 10/12/2007, -2/+14Are you kidding? I'm suprised that people would even look this up... much less own a Compaq PC.
    • evilspoons, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I think I heard about this before anyone I knew even had *internet*. I'm surprised it's lasted this long through their systems, awesome.
  • tymaishu, on 10/12/2007, -4/+29i used to think "press a key" meant the A key. At least that makes sense somewhat. (there is an "a" key)
  • RandomChu, on 10/12/2007, -14/+6"Any key? Where's the any key? Ooh, tab!"

    What a wonderful Simpsons episode that was.
  • Exploited, on 10/12/2007, -1/+21Any one who could find that FAQ, should be able to understand the concept of pressing any key you want on the key board.w
  • stephenwq, on 10/12/2007, -3/+19What do you mean it doesnt refer to a particular key?
    http://www.cems.uwe.ac.uk/~tdrewry/images/any.jpg
  • lgc90, on 10/12/2007, -3/+7Wait, you don't have an "any" key?
  • JohnsonHu, on 10/12/2007, -9/+0An old joke?
  • BPShirase, on 10/12/2007, -4/+17Kinda gives you an idea as to Compaq's consumer base, given that's in on a FAQ..
  • Avalontor, on 10/12/2007, -3/+18We used to put "Any" labels on the space bar for the users.
    • zweben, on 10/12/2007, -1/+23"Great, but now where's the space bar!?"
    • smellinator, on 10/12/2007, -0/+8@zweben:

      The space bar is in Mos Eisley, on Tatooine. There you can find pilots who made the Kessel run in less than twelve parsecs!
  • ipsophatso, on 10/12/2007, -9/+0http://www.wherestheanykey.com/
  • fiver22, on 10/12/2007, -13/+1Saw this in the 'upcomming stories' and thought it was mildly interresting but hardly worth a digg -people should check it out and then bury it as lame -that is IF they think it's lame.
    • fiver22, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Marahmarie, I really didn't mean to offend you. Were you trying to be ironic with the spelling and grammar mistakes?
  • Urusai, on 10/12/2007, -6/+2Does any computer actually do this anymore? It's as out of date as jokes about Abort, Retry, Ignore.
  • timmarhy, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2the irony is if they are able to find that infomation on a website they can clearly master the any key problem itself.
  • TwinkieTheKid, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5so....where is it?
  • Bonekhan, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Reminds me of the good ole' Simpsons episodes... nowadays the show has gone downhill--still good, though. I'd really like to meet a person under 40 years of age that needs help with this. Maybe I can also give him/her "happy hugs"!
  • greatcaffeine, on 10/12/2007, -3/+0That's ridiculous. That's quite possibly one of the dumbest support documents I've ever seen, right next to the 1337-speak guide on Microsoft's site.
  • abeg, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Don't have an "any" key buy one
    http://www.computergear.com/pressanykey4.html

    • smellinator, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3"Real key with double-sided tape sticks to any keyboard key."
      Huh? They show a picture of it, and it's smaller than the key immediately below it! How will it stick to "any keyboard key"? (or are they saying that it will stick to your any key???)

      "Press Any Key! (Set of 4) - $2.50 each
      9143 pad $9.99"
      Not sure I understand that math. Is the price $2.50? or $10? or $9.99?

      I guess I need to press the Any Key to get help!??
  • darshil, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1computation is been here for so many years now, and this just makes it seem we still live on old commodores !
  • Salmonized, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0please don't remind me...i had those many calls from panic'd clients way too many times...gets old real quick...
  • berlette, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1God, I have to agree with greatcaffeine on that one. This is totally ridiculous!
  • fliped, on 10/12/2007, -5/+2That is why a Mac only has one click, some people don't know the difference between right click and left click.
  • firehydra2k, on 10/12/2007, -2/+5I've seen this joke in starcraft. It still doesn't beat the ol bios glitch (where, if you don't have a keyboard, it will say so, and will ask you to "hit any key to continue")
    • ArmandoM, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2I always figured the bios prompted you for that so you could let the pc know when you've got the keyboard plugged in and it's ok to continue.
    • Fritzr, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0That BIOS 'bug' is alive and well ... same reasoning as it was originally ... bootup stopped on error so Press F1 to continue ... of course since it is keyboard error it looks silly

      Just got a question earlier today ... "Is MySpace installed on this computer?" When I answered No, she said "Oh well" & left ... I promptly turned my attention back to the web browser...

      I've got another computer sharing my DSL via wireless ... I was asked if it needed the phone line since it was using 802.11 :P

      Both of these were people supposedly able to function in this modern world.

      I also usually tell people to press spacebar for any key as it is least likely to have side effects :)
  • michaelyurechko, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Priceless.
  • Ascus, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Sad part is the FAQ is wrong. Any key refers to any key on the keyboard except the alt, ctrl, *****, caps lock, scroll lock or num lock. I have had people pressing the ctrl key over and over wondering why it do not work. (If someone asks me, I usually say the "any" key is the space bar, it works and is shorter to say and i simpler to understand)
  • tastypastry, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Reminds me of Homer J. Simpson.
    • omaryak, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Beat me to it. I was about to say, "Homer Simpson thanks you."
  • TimRogers, on 10/12/2007, -2/+1All is to be said by me is "lol".
  • Tynan, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2There was a joke about this in Starcraft: Brood War I believe... a game released last millennium.
  • dattaway, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Question #55332: will the warranty be voided if I "strike any key on the keyboard" as it states?
  • paragonmatrix, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Sadly a compaq user might actually ask this.

    Also i dont think i've seen a program use this verbage since the DOS days
  • HvitRavn, on 10/12/2007, -3/+1Buried as lame.
  • johnnyrotten, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1The problem is that a lot of stupid programmers don't handle this kind of thing correctly. When I see "Press any key to continue", I choose a random letter or number key and press it. Way too often, nothing happens because the programmer wrote the code to expect an "Enter", not "any key".

    And then there's the voicemail system that tells me that my password must be between 1 and 10 digits, but then says that the 4-digit code I entered isn't long enough. Uh, yeah...
  • Exzero, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1youd think they'd write that a few years earlier I mean hell when wouldnt have that question come up a few years earlier
  • bpwagner, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2What do I do if I get the ID10T error?? Help??
  • nixdoctor, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5How about this:
    "Press any key to continue, or any other key to quit."
  • Irfit, on 10/12/2007, -3/+2http://www.worth1000.com/entries/120500/120877lQTP_w.jpg
  • AZNL473ncy, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Why cant you just press all of them at once?

    or how about the spacebar? it dosen't have a label.
    • hootdoodie, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2I was helping a friend build his first computer. I had all the stuff in the shopping cart and sat him down to enter his credit card info. No ***** - He turned to me and asked if it was the shift key that made capital letters. He had not used a typewritter since college 30 years ago.
  • ShinRaTDR, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Why is it that as soon as you put someone in front of a computer they instantly become retarted? A computer is like anything else, logic will usually give you a good idea on how navigate through it. I don't mean people who cant set up their router or can't configure their printer, i mean the people who dont get the concept of clicking or typing. Or the people who think that when they get a message from a program telling them they have been automatically logged out they think they broke the computer. Its not like they dont exist, im in a tech class full of them.
    • CaptainChad, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Why is it that as soon as you put someone on digg they instantly can't spell?
  • theprizefight, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2http://www.studentradion.no/rev/uploads/Image/Programmer/ctrlaltdel/ctrl-alt-del.jpg
  • caseycoold, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0It's good to see that people's stupid questions are more than just legends.

    Also, CaptainChad, what would happen if there were no such things as rhetorical questions?
  • zerokarma, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0http://taka.no32.tk/diary/images/20050928_10.jpg

    http://www.gadgetizer.com/images/anykeykeyboard.jpg

    http://www.worth1000.com/entries/120500/120877lQTP_w.jpg
  • batterybattery, on 10/30/2007, -2/+0If you need a new laptop battery, I suggest you could puechase one from http://www.batteryfast.com , which would shipping to yu fast and the quality is satisfy satisfied.:) http://www.batteryfast.com/compaq/
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