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5 Superpowers Science Will Give Us in Our Lifetime

cracked.com — If you're young enough to care about comic books, odds are you'll live to see real life superheroes swinging through the streets, courtesy of science. So why's that a bad thing? We tell you.

Who dugg this? Made popular Jun 17, 2008

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  • redfred18t, on 06/16/2008, -2/+112"In 2005, Lee Spievack, a man working in a Cincinnati hobby store, sliced off the tip of his finger as he was showing a customer how you can lose a finger when dealing with a model plane's motor. This is either an ironic accident or the single most badass thing any retail associate has ever done to sell a customer."

    Pure genius. I seriously LOVE Cracked.

  • carpespasm, on 06/17/2008, -2/+99airplanes

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Airplane
  • mentallyinhell, on 06/16/2008, -4/+99But its no fun if everybody can do it, the whole point of a superpower is the ability to shove it in everybody else's face.
  • jakash, on 06/16/2008, -1/+68I don't mean to be "that guy" to point this out, but Peter Parker's webs were made to disintegrate a few hours after use.
  • mentallyinhell, on 06/16/2008, -0/+46But that's true too.
  • funkytommyman, on 06/17/2008, -3/+45Correction
    5 Superpowers Science Will Give ***the rich*** in Our Lifetime
  • Pilomotor, on 06/16/2008, -1/+42That's a bit like saying there's no point in having a portable boombox with which to play heavy metal in public other than harassing the Amish.
  • pineapplepaul, on 06/17/2008, -0/+37FTA: http://www.cyberdyne.jp/english/index.html

    Who the HELL thinks its a good idea to name a company that makes robots Cyberdyne? I mean, they might as well take out a hit on some random guy named John Connor who lives in his mom's basement in Nebraska. WHAT THE ***** MAN
  • magicjohnson, on 06/16/2008, -2/+39I'm still waiting on the ability to fly.
  • 49DA, on 06/17/2008, -0/+32with MINDBULLETS!
  • orangefly, on 06/17/2008, -1/+33How about the power to kill a yak, from 200 yards away....???....
  • Soulbow2, on 06/16/2008, -0/+29And Cracked loves Digg.
  • falstaff, on 06/17/2008, -0/+24"This baby's powerful enough to cut off a finger! Pay attention, I'm only going to do this once."
    My vote is for badass.
  • lordtyros, on 06/16/2008, -0/+24Also, Tony Stark was able to build his in a cave with a bucket of scraps..
  • bagboyrebel, on 06/17/2008, -0/+22Those will never work.
  • ChiffX, on 06/17/2008, -0/+22In reference to the invisibility suit: "Susumu Tachi, a scientist at Tokyo University, is hard at work on a ground-breaking piece of tech that could very well be one of mankind's greatest achievements ... until it's used by chronic masturbators to peer in on your sexual exploits, that is."

    I'm pretty sure that would make it mankind's GREATEST achievement.
  • SarahSue, on 06/16/2008, -0/+19somehow, the guy in science's iron man isn't quite as cool looking as the real iron man.
  • jgzman, on 06/17/2008, -0/+15The British Military is no-***** setting up a system of satellites to coordinate information between HQ and units all over the world.

    They call it Skynet.
  • inactive, on 08/11/2008, -0/+15Nothing like a science lesson from cracked.com.
  • Fhwqhgads, on 06/16/2008, -0/+15Nor would he have the balls nor the ability to whoop ass in a war zone.
  • Greengoo, on 06/17/2008, -3/+17Dugg for using the phrase "Bukkaked within inches of it's life"
  • inactive, on 06/17/2008, -0/+14How about the power... to move you?
  • TopherT, on 06/17/2008, -0/+14Thats Telekinesis, 49DA
  • inactive, on 06/17/2008, -0/+12What do you mean 'fake-invisible'? Is that like closing your eyes?
  • inactive, on 06/17/2008, -0/+11When everyone's super, no one is, and all that?
  • olddirtycr, on 06/17/2008, -0/+10HAL...Cyberdyne... obviously on purpose :p
  • rednaxela825, on 06/17/2008, -0/+9I logged in just so I could bury you!
  • fasda, on 06/17/2008, -0/+8actually the regrowing your finger bit sounds like a good medical technology.
  • Xebozone, on 06/17/2008, -0/+8From the article: it created a bond that one researcher called "As strong as a *****."

    Highly scientific stuff!
  • sh4d0w4lk3r, on 06/17/2008, -1/+8I'm sure they could make a "super steroid" with a side effect of furious anger.
  • biffen, on 06/17/2008, -1/+8Idiot.
  • aserer511, on 06/17/2008, -0/+7i want the ability to make all my submissions front page, like that!
  • Phoenix478, on 06/17/2008, -0/+7Science has also promised us flying cars, ray guns, and teleportation. Well Science, it's 2008, where the ***** is my ray gun?
  • yaddayaddayoda, on 06/17/2008, -0/+6Did he make the sale???
  • FlagrantDrugUse, on 06/17/2008, -0/+6Fail.
  • Goombellaofgoom, on 06/17/2008, -0/+6If that nano-velcro stuff is so strong... how are you supposed to get it off of things?
  • spookyttws, on 06/17/2008, -3/+9Who's lifetime? Mine? I'm just glad we're spending money on developing these technologies, and not those silly stem cells. Screw curing horrible diseases, I can be fake-invisible!
  • Eric-tile, on 06/17/2008, -1/+7That's telekinesis, Kyle.
  • Danby123, on 06/17/2008, -0/+5Are there videos of the Hal suit?
  • dha07030, on 06/17/2008, -0/+5If there was only some web site you could use to find videos.
  • MaruLono, on 06/17/2008, -0/+5where the hell is my jetpack?? i've been waiting for it since i arrived into the future back in 2000..!!
  • dha07030, on 06/17/2008, -0/+6Most things promising get funded, just maybe not by the government, also there is funding for non embryonic stem cells.
  • HouseofEl, on 06/17/2008, -0/+4Centrifugal force would cause you to weigh somewhere between 3 and 4 times your weight at the bottom of the swing. Yes a strong person could probably swing on a line, but swinging the way Spider-man does? I don't think so. You'd have to be pretty strong if the line was something like 100 feet long.
  • Danby123, on 06/17/2008, -0/+4I looked on Youtube and couldn't find any of it in action.
    I was just wondering if anybody knew of a video that showed the Hal suit actually doing something.
  • iiBeLiEvE, on 06/17/2008, -2/+5I'm not.

    *fwoosh!*
  • Majink, on 06/17/2008, -0/+3to move you...
  • SeniorCarbone, on 06/17/2008, -0/+3you can order one of those:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Williams_X-Jet
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUHHI5JByyI
    not that cool but you can do your job
  • HouseofEl, on 06/17/2008, -1/+4I can't wait for someone to create Spider-man's webs and then try and swing. It's going to be a fun video to watch when that person rips their arm out of their socket and crashes into the ground. Better use that exoskeleton with it!
  • GDOG5, on 06/17/2008, -4/+7Does anyone else see an advertisement for SCIENTOLOGY at the bottom of the second page! How dare you cracked, how dare you!
  • kyle415, on 06/17/2008, -0/+3e
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