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- gobbleplex, on 03/03/2009, -1/+74"30 Rules Every Square/Enix RPG Must Follow"
^ Fixed that for you. - BLyn, on 03/04/2009, -1/+44This one's good too: http://project-apollo.net/text/rpg.html
- sanguinekane, on 03/04/2009, -3/+25It seems that every gamesradar article about RPGs just glosses over the fact that countries outside of Asia do in fact make RPGs as well.
- atomicpoet, on 03/03/2009, -3/+25Your best guy friend becomes evil. Gay people never seem to get a break.
- Velnich, on 03/04/2009, -0/+18"Every rumour you've ever heard is true." Awesome.
- bakatrinh, on 03/04/2009, -1/+18They forgot Big *****. Every game has a character with ridiculously huge boobs that seem to defy gravity. The developers spent most of their time shaping and programming it's "bounce physics"
- inactive, on 03/04/2009, -0/+17kinda fun reading that, it was like playing an rpg
- jawbreaker4fs, on 03/04/2009, -0/+171. You've overslept!
2. An old lady who wants help
3. You team up with your childhood friend
4. If your best friend is a girl, ...
5. If your best friend is a guy, ...
6. A crusty old adventurer will give you your first sword
7. All the rumors are true
8. Your first companion has powerful healing magic
9. A surprising twist to pull you into a global struggle
10. You're fighting the Church
11. You're fighting the corrupt government
12. Your village has been destroyed
13. Encounter the main villain before you're ready
14. And then you'll learn a valuable lesson about friendship
15. You'll be attacked by a Sea-Monster!
16. You're sucked into a whirlpool or shipwrecked
17. Go to the temple
18. Meet with the oracle
19. There's an ancient evil being revived
20. BONUS SPOILER: The original evil-sealer was an ancestor of yours, but apparently, he could have sealed it a bit tighter because, obviously, it's coming back
21. Long ago an ancient race lived on the planet
22. BONUS SPOILER: The ancients created technology that was too powerful and destroyed themselves in a civil war
23. You get an airship
24. One of your closest friends happens to be one of the last Ancients
25. BONUS SPOILER: Other members of the Ancient race include yourself and your nemesis
26. Your father's secret research
27. Your archenemy is actually your brother
28. You have to visit the "dark world"
29. Kiss that cute girl in your party
30. All final bosses have at least three stages - yocouchdigga, on 03/03/2009, -4/+18the water monster you encounter on the boat you kill with electric/lightning spells and neutral attacks, not fire! Pshhh...
- dtfinch, on 03/04/2009, -0/+12Phantasy Star IV added a twisted to rule 4, killing off your girlfriend mid-game to make room for a genetically engineered, affection-starved, 1 year old cat girl, growth-accelerated to adult size and raised by machines, having never met another sentient life form before your party came along.
- joelsmif, on 03/04/2009, -2/+14translation = legalize pot
- killerpotato, on 03/04/2009, -0/+11This is why Earthbound is so awesome
- Murrabbit, on 03/04/2009, -1/+11JRPGs != Every RPG.
Also apparently one rule every ad-revenue based list-form comedy site must follow is the completely unessential splitting of articles into a dozen ***** pages. - coyote1284, on 03/04/2009, -0/+9It could have been split over 30 pages. XD
- wcstryfe10, on 03/04/2009, -1/+10Rule #1
Chrono Trigger
Do I need to say more? - tiredluke129, on 03/03/2009, -6/+15#31: Realize how many hours of your life you've pissed away playing the game. Buy the sequel anyway.
- Inverno, on 03/04/2009, -0/+9Every D&D campaign ever.
- juicedigital, on 03/04/2009, -0/+8That's immediately what I thought of when I saw this article.
- dekuscrub, on 03/04/2009, -0/+8Dude it's called Firefox.
- Pentagarn, on 03/04/2009, -0/+8Eh, it is kinda funny if you grew up playing a lot of those Nintendo and Super Nintendo RPGs. Saw a lot of those plot elements over and over.
So far, Persona 4 doesn't seem to follow even one of these rules. - tglas, on 03/04/2009, -0/+8#29.5: Spend a ridiculous amount of time finishing up small meaningless tasks because the fate of the world will be different if you only delivered 14 of 15 letters between the lovers from opposing families.
- pagit, on 03/03/2009, -2/+9when in doubt go to tavern to start or finish quest, retrieve information, find party members, and buy supplies
- scojerroc, on 03/04/2009, -0/+7Anybody who liked the submission should read BLyn's list, then bury the submission. There's no comparison.
- KeillRandor, on 03/04/2009, -0/+6Articles like this basically show you one thing that you should already know:
When you get down to it, all the basic stories have already been told, and it's nothing more than variations on a theme from now on.
Which is not to say that it isn't worthwhile of course, since the differences in variation can still make things interesting.
However, and I'll keep saying this for as long as I have to, Game-play and game-play mechanics should NOT be considered secondary in RPG's, which, unfortunately for me, a lot of people seem to do.
I don't really play a game for the story, though if they have a good one then it makes the game better. No, I play for the game-play. For me, what makes RPG's currently unique, are the game-play mechanics they tend to use which have a lot of depth, and game-play DEVELOPMENT - (which started with the original D&D). I know I'm know I might be in a minority, but it's THAT what's always made RPG's what they are for me, rather than the content/plot/characters etc..
The MOST annoying thing for me, is that IMO, it's the game-play and game-play mechanics that offer the most amount of growth in what RPG's can actually do, and not their content now, but everyone seems to be rehashing the same-old stuff there too...
In short, I'm getting bored... - Metasquares, on 03/04/2009, -0/+6But then it usually turns out that he's not really the ultimate enemy. He may have been brainwashed/deceived and may join your side before fighting the ultimate enemy.
- jgtg32a, on 03/04/2009, -0/+6With next page interception adverts every so often.
- bghs2003, on 03/04/2009, -2/+8The article is many years too late. Everyone is fully aware of how formulaic most JRPG stories are. It is the gaming equivalent of writing an article on how Bush is stupid and Clinton is horny.
- CressCrowbits, on 03/04/2009, -0/+6If that had been the case they forgot the rule about there having to be a character called 'Cid'.
- inactive, on 03/04/2009, -4/+1030 item list on 5 pages. Buried for games/tech radar ad impression spam.
- inactive, on 03/04/2009, -2/+7Im playing the Witcher right now.
Nuff said. - Matri, on 03/04/2009, -0/+5Uh, Fallout 3 has rules 2, 6, 7, 9, 11, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 24, 25 (half-true), and 26
- inactive, on 03/04/2009, -0/+5Clearly you haven't played Ultima 7. Do so, immediately.
- Jeremyz0r, on 03/04/2009, -0/+5"Your archenemy is actually your brother." UGH!
- LOGNATR, on 03/04/2009, -0/+5Grandia II, Final Fantasy X, and Tales of Symphonia come to mind.
Love all three. - StarFingHipster, on 03/04/2009, -0/+5Despite the fact this is primer to all Square RPGs and a crap ton of JRPGs, props on the FFVII party on the last page.
- jamesmcm, on 03/04/2009, -1/+5I prefer Western RPGs like Oblivion, Morrowind, Fallout 3, Deus Ex, System Shock 2, etc. The JRPGs are just too repetitive and abstract.
- MutatedNantuko, on 03/04/2009, -0/+4This is just one huge spoiler for FF II/IV. But those games "created" these turn of events that are cliche by now, so you can't really get upset. If you read "The Hero With A Thousand Faces" by Campbell you'll realize that all fantasy stories follow a similar path.
- KalZakath, on 03/04/2009, -0/+4A list of 30 things that have happened in JRPGs.
- modix, on 03/04/2009, -1/+5When you're making brash generalizations, you have to ignore every exception and focus on the instances where it's true. There's as many RPGs that have little to none of these rules as there are are that have multiple. People will just think of the games where they DO fit and not remember all the others where it doesn't. Common psych rule, but it gets clicks and people pump out these stupid lists.
- deadbeatsaint, on 03/05/2009, -0/+4Since you've obviously never played any real RPG's, please don't say any more.
- IamNomad, on 03/04/2009, -0/+4I wonder how far your going to get dugg down for putting up a shameless plug.
- chokeaduck, on 03/04/2009, -0/+4You should have NoScripts and AdBlock Plus on. Duh.
- ShyGuy91284, on 03/04/2009, -0/+3They forgot one: If you are forced to "sleep" in the game, a story-moving event will happen, most likely in the middle of the night.
- PeppermintPig, on 03/04/2009, -0/+3Yep. While the article is very much tongue-in-cheek, it doesn't do nearly enough work to refine the formula. There have been better articles and sources on this subject.
- ripter, on 03/04/2009, -0/+3I loved Fallout (all three) Deus Ex, System Shock (BioShock) etc. But I just can't get into Oblivion for the life of me.
- tglas, on 03/04/2009, -0/+3Your face is gay.
- ThecNiqueMan, on 03/04/2009, -0/+3Oh GOOD for YOU!
- V3NOM, on 03/04/2009, -0/+3I was remembering playing Breath of Fire II (SNES) a long time ago as I read the article. Not Square Enix (It was Capcom), and it fit almost every stereotype.
- jedinate, on 03/04/2009, -0/+3I'm suing this guy for stealing my game idea !!
- eviscerator, on 03/04/2009, -0/+3Indeed
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