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What Scientologists Have to Say About Scientology watch!

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  • twtmc, on 05/05/2008, -14/+339Dude! I never realized that my lungs were xenu's scrotum! IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE NOW!
    • badwithcomputer, on 05/05/2008, -6/+69it would explain your bad breath...
      • oxdeltaxo, on 05/05/2008, -3/+16Salty ball sac breath is the worst.
        • jimmy17, on 05/05/2008, -6/+9thats what she said.
        • hempydave, on 05/05/2008, -21/+2I've never got my nose anywhere near anyones balls to find out.
          You dudes suk a lot of penis ? or are you really flexible?
      • wellyuk, on 05/06/2008, -1/+3That would be YOUR breath blowing back in your face.
    • ThinkBox, on 05/05/2008, -22/+67"QUOTE FROM VIDEO!!!!" Haha video quote!
      • haiduz, on 05/05/2008, -6/+133I can imagine how someone goes to see a new comedy at a movie theater with you. Then as youre walking out of the theater they enthusuastically tell you their favorite part or line from the movie. Then in a sacrastic and harshly berating tone accompanied by loud repulsive forced laughter you tell them "HAHAHAHAHA you just told me about a movie that we both saw less than five minutes ago". Then it gets really akward for like 10 seconds and you dont speak to each other for the rest of the night. Eventually this person never talks to you again.
        • ThinkBox, on 05/05/2008, -43/+11Different environments warrant different displays of communication.

          A comment generally adds something, some for of discussion. It tries to make a point.

          I enjoy it when my friends share things with me that make them laugh. But if a random stranger walks up to me and says a line from the movie, it doesn't make me laugh.
          • feshmania, on 05/05/2008, -7/+49the type of communication i would like you to employ is silence
        • souljaboytellem, on 05/05/2008, -10/+9I actually have that problem, I always seem to repeat quotes, I understand how annoying it can get, but your right, theres no reason to be an ass about it
          • dOOBiEx213, on 05/05/2008, -8/+14you're*
          • relic180, on 05/05/2008, -7/+10He said "your right", kinda like when you say "my bad", but the opposite I guess.
          • speakerfordead, on 05/05/2008, -2/+8Why try to make bad grammar ok?
          • amirman, on 05/05/2008, -2/+6...or it's like "your perogative," bobby brown.
          • carleethian, on 05/05/2008, -3/+5you also listen to bad music
        • themastersb, on 05/05/2008, -6/+6Was the theoretical movie only a few minutes long?
          • RobotBuddha, on 05/05/2008, -4/+6Exactly. When I go out of the theater, nobody is quoting the last 10% of the script, word for word.
        • iliketokick, on 05/12/2008, -0/+1I think people have every right to be an ass about stuff like that. Sometimes things bug people. Quoting a movie right after you see it is almost as bad as when people are on vacation and call their friends/family to have drawn out conversations about their trip WHILE THEY ARE STILL ON THE TRIP. Everyone on the trip then has to hear the day's events AGAIN.
          /rant
    • Karna101, on 05/05/2008, -1/+31orignial video on scientology official youtube channel
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKs-u0q467U

      they disabled ratings so make sure to flag the video for "spam"
    • Omano, on 05/05/2008, -1/+50I also didn't realize that 9/11 was a natural disaster.. whats up with that?!?
      • hempydave, on 05/05/2008, -1/+19Xenu said so
      • Kyan, on 05/05/2008, -2/+13Of course it was a natural accident. What is going to happen when a plane files into a skyscaper? Naturally, it may fall.
    • mrfreeziexp, on 05/05/2008, -2/+10You know what disturbing? The original video was actually featured on Youtube's front page.
    • stackered, on 05/06/2008, -0/+3Xenu is not happy... not happy at all.
    • 1aPowerDigger, on 05/06/2008, -5/+2As wacky as it is... there are plenty of equally wacky ( http://www.ifate.com ) beliefs out there which people just accept as being normal because they're so ubiquitous. (And don't even get me started on that whole Bible thing)
      • mimetic2, on 05/06/2008, -1/+0I've been on Digg for a long time and this is one of the best things ive ever seen. That guy has fantastic timing.
    • deanoplex, on 05/06/2008, -0/+7Please help keep Scientologists off of meth: http://digg.com/users/luana1980/history
    • C4PT41NM4RV3L, on 05/06/2008, -0/+3My heart is a giant testicle? Well, that explains the whole love/sex thing.

      Testartaries ftw!
  • Grantismo, on 05/05/2008, -12/+94Yay Xenu semen
    • feshmania, on 05/05/2008, -0/+7Xenu must jerk it a lot.
    • IareKEVLAR, on 05/05/2008, -1/+3I just wrote my Senior Thesis for high school on Scientology, I wish I could have seen this before writing, it would have helped so much!
    • notorious1, on 05/06/2008, -0/+6xemen
  • ladyxluck, on 05/05/2008, -14/+62HAHAHHAHAAHA
    • cannibaljp, on 05/05/2008, -2/+13My reaction EXACTLY!

      "Virgin tears..." - I almost peed when i heard that line.
    • nyx210, on 05/05/2008, -0/+2ScientLOLojyuuichi...
  • louiebaur, on 05/05/2008, -16/+202I was murdering dolphins with my bare hands
  • NeedzABetterSN, on 05/05/2008, -6/+113I love how the original video is categorized under "Nonprofit."
    • stonebone4, on 05/05/2008, -5/+84Easily explained:

      1. Make up silly sci-fi story, get it refused by book publishers, turn it into your own religion
      2. Exploit people dumb enough to believe it
      3. Piss off lots of people on the internet with your shenanigans 50 years later, eventually leading to your enterprise's demise
      4. ????
      5. Non-profit!
    • ganjadude4391, on 05/05/2008, -1/+23perhaps false prophet would bore precise?
  • matthewdestroys, on 05/05/2008, -16/+176'it teaches you why your heart is an alien testicle pumping space cum through your veins'

    ROFL
    • relic180, on 05/05/2008, -2/+3Holy ***** that made me laugh my xenu damn ass off!
    • Kali075, on 05/06/2008, -1/+1I'm so confused...
      usually when people quote the movie and say LOL people digg them down...

      whats happening?
  • zenithmbr, on 05/05/2008, -15/+190"it's sculpting people's poop into voodoo dolls of the members of the googoo dolls"
    • bjs3171, on 05/05/2008, -2/+8***** classic.
    • relic180, on 05/05/2008, -0/+6Ok, I have to stop reading this ***** or I'm going to get in trouble at work for laughing too hard.
      • PURPLEDRINK, on 05/05/2008, -0/+12Jason? Is that you? You need to step into my office for a minute.
  • jc7012, on 05/05/2008, -28/+587*quote from the movie you just watched*


    *acronym expressing laugther
    • t4k3n, on 05/05/2008, -3/+141*obscure reference to pop culture*
      • Jb611, on 05/05/2008, -1/+96*dugg, even though I didn't get the reference*
        • KokomoNYC, on 05/05/2008, -2/+107*phrase between asterisks describing itself*
        • str1fe, on 05/05/2008, -2/+51*irrelevant Obama praise*
        • CobaltBlue, on 05/05/2008, -5/+47*Ron Paul will solve the irrelevant Obama praise problem by eliminating the Federal Reserve*
        • sovietninja, on 05/05/2008, -1/+32*quote admonishing HRC*
        • Kyan, on 05/05/2008, -1/+33* ***************** *
        • KokomoNYC, on 05/05/2008, -2/+23*types out "C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER"*
        • Lanketer, on 05/06/2008, -0/+4*The rock: Hey guys whats going on?*
        • NuFadZoo, on 05/06/2008, -1/+58Missed shift key8
      • bjs3171, on 05/05/2008, -3/+55*i like little house on the prairie*
        • soupdawg30, on 05/05/2008, -1/+21*Homosexual reference*
        • Fijster, on 05/05/2008, -1/+24*points out that whatever it is you are doing is being done wrong*
      • ORBAT, on 05/05/2008, -1/+48*misses reference and thinks you were serious*
        • freqk, on 05/06/2008, -0/+20*acts with astounding hostility towards you for making a simple mistake*
    • bobburn, on 05/05/2008, -6/+115*act like a complete cockbag*
    • JonTheGoose, on 05/05/2008, -2/+144*masturbate furiously*
    • CurlyMike139125, on 05/05/2008, -2/+90*completely inappropriate or off-color meme or catchphrase*
      • mixsense, on 05/06/2008, -1/+3*tries to start LOL[insert thread topic here]z*
    • _skin_, on 05/05/2008, -2/+75*reference pwned in one way or another*
    • g33kfu, on 05/05/2008, -2/+89*disrupt chain of comments with Killer Instincts reference*
    • plhearn, on 05/05/2008, -1/+88*irrelevant political message*
    • 4pple5auce, on 05/05/2008, -1/+121*rick roll*
      • str1fe, on 05/05/2008, -0/+58*comment mentioning how no one falls for uuiU*
      • norcalscan, on 05/05/2008, -3/+20*ohh man, you had me there! I should have caught the URL lulz*
    • Magnolit, on 05/05/2008, -1/+133*it's a trap ASCII*
    • unicronband, on 05/05/2008, -2/+102*being visually aware of what one has done there*
    • WhipTail, on 05/05/2008, -3/+65*irrelevant query as to what you could place in your rectum*
    • merr, on 05/05/2008, -3/+60*link to "epic thread" graphic*
    • foomojive, on 05/05/2008, -2/+55*reference to origin of meta-meme on bash.org*
    • pkon, on 05/05/2008, -83/+0LOL I was murdering dolphins with my bare hands LOL

      LOL!!!!!!
      • sovietninja, on 05/05/2008, -4/+49*C-C-C-C-COMBOBREAKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*
      • simonafa10, on 05/05/2008, -3/+23You have to be that GUY
      • Twinfire0, on 05/06/2008, -3/+12*Massive facepalm ASCII image*
      • jwk4heels, on 05/06/2008, -1/+10*Noise of object and/or idea soaring closely past head at high velocity*
    • Klarth, on 05/05/2008, -0/+40*complaint about banal farky ***** like this*
    • wavesmachine, on 05/05/2008, -3/+124*takes screenshot, uploads to free hosting site, submits to digg as "This is why I love digg"*
    • nphase, on 05/05/2008, -2/+57*ron paul reference*
    • eddy23170, on 05/05/2008, -1/+57*I just made a sofa cushion fort*
    • CaptainTater, on 05/05/2008, -0/+70**satirical post in reference to stereotypical digg user's comments, in between two asterisks**
    • Tryptomine, on 05/05/2008, -4/+43*Questions whether this post is following the pattern correctly.*
    • pyrotix, on 05/05/2008, -57/+4Ron Paul 08

      lol
      • TheAstronomer, on 05/06/2008, -1/+9*points out that you don't get what's going on here*
    • anstice85, on 05/05/2008, -2/+74*plea to digg me down*
      • CaptainTater, on 05/05/2008, -0/+49*wasn't sure whether or not to digg down*
      • Verz, on 05/05/2008, -0/+21*suggestion to keep him at +1 digg so he loses either way*
    • Sendai129, on 05/05/2008, -1/+45*commenting about posting in an epic thread while adding nothing to the aforementioned thread*
    • eurynome420, on 05/05/2008, -2/+46*is not just sure, is HIV positive*
      • jftitan, on 05/05/2008, -1/+15*cartman reference about being so HIV Negative all the time*
    • FadieZ, on 05/05/2008, -0/+71*Url leading to relevant XKCD comic*
      • norcalscan, on 05/05/2008, -1/+32*whine about every story having an XKCD reference"
        • culbeda, on 05/06/2008, -0/+11*whines when people point out that most XKCD references aren't relevant or overly entertaining*
          • com2, on 05/06/2008, -0/+4*whines about how diggers just cant get along*
    • blitzkrieg047, on 05/05/2008, -42/+2THIS WAS PURE WIN
    • DonKarnage25, on 05/05/2008, -1/+48*spelling nazi claiming superiority over you because of your obvious intellectual shortcomings due to your inability to spell laughter correctly*
      • IAmRoot, on 05/05/2008, -1/+29*Godwin's law*
      • Speed, on 05/06/2008, -0/+3*correcting spelling mistake made by spelling nazi*
      • Emilylime, on 05/07/2008, -5/+0how many times did you re-read your sentence to make sure there were no spelling errors? how many?
        • DonKarnage25, on 05/08/2008, -1/+2Several times... but then I thought about misspelling something on purpose to give someone else something to work with.
          • Emilylime, on 05/09/2008, -1/+0guys that was supposed to be funny. i re-read my sentences all the time because i'm a stickler for spelling
          • DonKarnage25, on 05/10/2008, -0/+1Yeah I don't know why they're digging you down.
    • xRand0mx, on 05/05/2008, -1/+34*irrelevant rant about politics, leading to a heated discussion about Hillary and Obama*
      • anstice85, on 05/05/2008, -2/+21*haha, like anyone on digg would defend Hillary*
    • Ikulus, on 05/05/2008, -3/+43*OGC*
      • litheon, on 05/06/2008, -0/+10*Reference indicating this user doesn't get it*
    • ligyron, on 05/05/2008, -32/+2LOL i guess this is why they call digg random~ :S
    • Spraypaint, on 05/05/2008, -26/+5[asterisk] with action in the middle [/asterisk]
    • TheObviousChild, on 05/05/2008, -25/+2*My cat's breath smells like cat food.*
      • TheObviousChild, on 05/06/2008, -5/+1Really? Nobody can appreciate a random Ralph Wiggum comment? ...said at a totally inappropriate moment? My heart is breaking.
        • Speed, on 05/06/2008, -0/+4Correct usage would have been *random ralph wiggum comment* I think
    • weeFred, on 05/05/2008, -2/+48*puts on wizard robe*
      • wellyuk, on 05/05/2008, -2/+15*and hat*
        • IDiggDrSiN, on 05/05/2008, -19/+3Not you again , I swear to god if you speak to me again I'm phoning the police
    • stevensj2, on 05/05/2008, -1/+28*obligatory statement regarding a combo having existed, and then being broken*
    • mrfreeziexp, on 05/05/2008, -28/+3this would be funny if it weren't so true.
      • anstice85, on 05/05/2008, -1/+31*inquiry about the rumor I herd that you liek mudkips*
        • unicronband, on 05/05/2008, -1/+21*confirmation of rumor that, in fact, comment parent LOOOOOOOVES mudkips*
    • ab207705, on 05/05/2008, -22/+0OMNOMNOMNOMNOM
    • gmm4life, on 05/05/2008, -17/+3*:)GC*
    • ThinkBox, on 05/05/2008, -1/+38*complaint about how I made the same joke once and got dugg down by losers*
    • MrGlass952, on 05/05/2008, -16/+2*THIS IS WHAT SCIENTOLOGISTS ACTUALLY BELIEVE*
    • Awsomo6, on 05/05/2008, -3/+27*Comment on how scientologists are not my friends... guy*
      • wellyuk, on 05/05/2008, -2/+21*retort on how you're not my guy... buddy*
        • TheObviousChild, on 05/05/2008, -1/+19*annoyingly excessive comment on how you're not my buddy ...friend*
          • sticko13, on 05/06/2008, -0/+12*scathing reply on how you're not my friend... guy*
        • amg0927, on 05/06/2008, -2/+11*another comment that your not my friend... chief*
        • Shuber, on 05/06/2008, -1/+7*grammar nazi comment pointing out how 'your' should be 'you're'*
    • elijahalcantara, on 05/05/2008, -2/+44*a lone comment at the end of the thread that no one will digg up or read*
    • xenoc1de, on 05/05/2008, -14/+1*oh yea?*
    • bernlin2000, on 05/05/2008, -3/+9Ru so lazy you can't even be trite and cliche like the rest of us?
      *Continues rant, ends with some sort of swear word describing OP*
      • culbeda, on 05/06/2008, -10/+5"Ru so lazy..."

        Is that Scooby or Astro?
    • cranium, on 05/05/2008, -1/+32*request sheeple to wake up*
    • Evazan21, on 05/05/2008, -3/+31*asks how this got to the front page with so few digs*
      • unorginalityftw, on 05/05/2008, -0/+13*obligatory digg down into oblivion*
    • TheProtested, on 05/05/2008, -9/+3*douchebagish statement obnoxiously correcting the spelling of laughter*
      • DonKarnage25, on 05/05/2008, -1/+18*douchebagish statement about how I already pointed that out in a post above you*
    • mockupscaledown, on 05/05/2008, -0/+28*query whether or not said object is able to be blended*
      • JadedDeath, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2*confirmation of ability to blend*
    • mfratz, on 05/05/2008, -7/+25....and done. Congratulations.
    • superbobd, on 05/06/2008, -10/+2*Dies*
    • Light0, on 05/06/2008, -10/+3*is not your buddy, guy*
    • stackered, on 05/06/2008, -12/+3*statement about how much I love this thread just to feel like I was actually part of it*
    • ultraJesus, on 05/06/2008, -11/+4*runs into room naked screaming and throwing buckets of purple paint on bystanders*
      • riskybeats, on 05/06/2008, -8/+3I want to dig you down like the internet people tell me too, but I'm conflicted.
    • WakasakiRocky, on 05/06/2008, -3/+19*welcomes new type of overloard
    • Jeepy, on 05/06/2008, -4/+9*takes picture of comment thread to repost as funny Digg inside joke*
    • Dylan47, on 05/06/2008, -0/+8*moves to loli board*
    • jbassfretless, on 05/06/2008, -0/+22*expects to see a screen shot of this upcoming on digg within the next 24 hours and feels empty inside at the knowledge that i will undoubtedly digg it when it does.*
      • jbassfretless, on 05/06/2008, -4/+2yep its already on the front page
        • JadedDeath, on 05/06/2008, -0/+3*comment that you are doing it wrong*
    • Ender008, on 05/06/2008, -10/+5This thread is the essence of digg...
    • iCanHasUsername, on 05/06/2008, -1/+12* sound of gobbling something tasty *
    • EwMo, on 05/06/2008, -1/+7*continues old comment thread through the use of another digg post*
      • TheMooCow, on 05/06/2008, -0/+9*adds link to reddit where story first appeared last week*
        • d0onut, on 05/06/2008, -0/+6*logs on and diggs, before leaving comment on why I logged on*
      • byah, on 05/06/2008, -1/+4*hopes the next comment is better than my own*
    • knightblade2oo4, on 05/06/2008, -0/+14**I step away from the mic to breathe**
    • u5bLue, on 05/06/2008, -0/+7*hopes to end this thread*
    • TheMooCow, on 05/06/2008, -0/+8*adds 4 step process, 3rd step being "?" and 4th step "profit"
    • Noncentz, on 05/06/2008, -0/+7*Picture or didn't happen*
    • bjs3171, on 05/06/2008, -0/+4"comment about how funny it is that there are so many *action* comments there were in a row*
    • mvanwing, on 05/06/2008, -0/+6*claims this is old and provides link*
    • PimpinOnWelfare, on 05/06/2008, -9/+2*wants to be dugg down by visitors from 'this is why i love digg' thread*
      • DestroyFascism, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2*i did not go there and see the picture. I flew in my clapped out Chevy nova space junk while sucking cum from venus, contradicting myself. I realised I never contradict myself*
    • wellyuk, on 05/06/2008, -0/+4*some comment about a particular year in the past wanting it's joke returning*
      • ScottyWZ, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2*someone claiming to be a grammar nazi pointing out that "it's" should be "its" and why*
    • Jeepy, on 05/06/2008, -0/+6*complaint about not being part of the screen shot in "why I love digg" submission, subsequent resubmission under own name that makes it to front page tomorrow*
    • Zerkave, on 05/06/2008, -0/+3**
    • byaselli21, on 05/06/2008, -1/+4*desperately keeps the this joke going*
    • MrSpam, on 05/06/2008, -3/+2*Likes Mudkips*
    • MyDiggIsBig, on 05/06/2008, -4/+1****** dick with no life dissing jc7012 for forgetting the last asterix after "laughing"*
    • Estaris, on 05/06/2008, -1/+3*A steady constant whine of how many Scientology articles are submitted and are supported by everyone*
      *add comments of how all/any/some religions are just as evil*
      *follow up post with how Scientology is not a relgion so quit whining so follow this link www.RandomLinkofLogicforScientologicallyConfused.com*
    • kjcdude, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2http://digg.com/comedy/This_is_why_I_love_Digg_12
    • seg7, on 05/06/2008, -1/+2*/ while(true) {
      comment($this);
      } /*
    • DwightSchruter, on 05/06/2008, -8/+1C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
      ...hey guise?
      ...you still here...?
    • f54280, on 05/06/2008, -1/+1*sppeling correction for that quote*

      * http://link.to.net.thread/of/people/talking/about/ ... *
    • DestroyFascism, on 05/06/2008, -0/+5*A vAgUe AttemPt to Fit iN*
    • SynaMax, on 05/06/2008, -4/+0*YTMND has retarded but funny sites*
    • Rov3r, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2*statement that this made the frontpage, gets dugg down because everyone already knows*
    • Lyk4n, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2*touches self inappropriately*
    • JadedDeath, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2*words of praise for fish food*
    • jbp826, on 05/07/2008, -0/+3*sees what everyone's doing here*
    • someone173406, on 05/07/2008, -1/+2*lolwut*
  • UltramegaOK, on 05/05/2008, -12/+54Scientology + badwithcomputer = automatic front page.
    • badwithcomputer, on 05/05/2008, -4/+123if that's the case, let's hope i never leave digg. that would mean that front page - badwithcomputer = Scientology!

  • Williamssarali, on 05/05/2008, -10/+27Dugg for Lord Xenu.
    • latova, on 05/05/2008, -3/+9Well I for one, welcome our new alien overlords.
      • agentlame, on 05/05/2008, -3/+1I hate when I see people buried simply because no one got the reference.

        + Digg to you, sir.
        • withoutamartyr, on 05/05/2008, -0/+5I can assure you, it's not because no one got the reference.
        • fcrow, on 05/05/2008, -1/+1Show me the reference!
          • Matri, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2You want the reference? You can't handle the reference!
  • ThinkBox, on 05/05/2008, -10/+39I space cummed for the lulz!
  • lolmeout40, on 05/05/2008, -7/+9Brilliant.
  • sicksixsex, on 05/05/2008, -32/+3lol is this video a joke or is they just crazy?
    • dullnation, on 05/05/2008, -1/+31This video is 100% serious.
      • Mejari, on 05/05/2008, -2/+3I am being super serial right now. You're all super stoked on me, even if you don't know it.
    • comradeTJH, on 05/05/2008, -0/+9Well, actually this one is 100% serious: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKs-u0q467U (it's already scary enough)
      But of course the bare-hand-dolphin-killing-guy makes it worth watching :-)
      • dullnation, on 05/05/2008, -3/+1That video is 120% serious.
      • offput, on 05/05/2008, -6/+1Why exactly is that video scary? Whether you like it or not, most of the people who are scientologists aren't psychos. You're not even taught the crazy ***** until you've been in the church for years. This video is essentially taking a video of christians talking about how much they loev their religion and how it helps them, and then inserting someone spouting the craziness that a fringe of the church has to say.

        Yes, the church has done terrible things and is far too litigious. That doesn't make the members of the church, who don't control it and are simply there because that particular faith is actually helpful to them, evil or scary. And you shouldn't attack their beliefs, you should attack the manner in which they defend those beliefs. Attack the institution, not the concept.
        • Verz, on 05/05/2008, -0/+1Because the concept of paying hundreds of thousands of dollars to learn about what you believe in is completely alright?
        • fredmv, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2No ***** most `Scientologists' (lol) aren't bad people. They're ***** brainwashed zombies. I think it's very obvious the _corporation_ of Scientology is the one to have a serious problem with.
      • bamapachyderm, on 05/06/2008, -0/+1Flagged for shocking/disgusting content. :)
    • IllBeBack, on 05/05/2008, -3/+4They are super serial.
      - ManBearPig
    • Deltanonymous, on 05/07/2008, -0/+1Yes and Yes
  • HeDiggMe, on 05/05/2008, -9/+36LMFAO The guy in the red plaid shirt was killing me. I had to push aside breakfast cause I was laughing so hard.
    • ligyron, on 05/05/2008, -0/+15Yeah, he kind of stood out to me as well..
      • HeDiggMe, on 05/05/2008, -1/+9I didnt notice he was the only comedian and I didnt realize this was a parody the first time I saw it. Discovering that just made it better.
  • jameshickmott, on 05/05/2008, -13/+2http://www2.funnyordie.com/81bc2f14f0.flv
  • HenvY, on 05/05/2008, -4/+24Sweet sperm sac of Xenu that was probably the funniest video i've ever seen.
  • smacksaw, on 05/05/2008, -3/+39The best part is that they can't sue to get this removed because it's a parody. Hell, they could have exposed actual copyrighted material in this video!
    • neoform, on 05/05/2008, -0/+26Actually, you can sue anyone for anything.

      Winning is a different matter.
      • Mejari, on 05/05/2008, -0/+22Remember, the goal of a lawsuit is not to win, but to harass. So sayeth the great LRon
        • ORBAT, on 05/05/2008, -0/+13And Ron said, "Let there be litigation" and there was litigation. And Ron saw that litigation was good.
      • Bklynadam, on 05/06/2008, -0/+1No. You'll be sanctioned if you file frivolous lawsuits. Rule 11.
      • Mo0man, on 05/06/2008, -0/+1There won't be sanctions. Ever heard of the Cult Awareness Network?
    • CaptainTater, on 05/05/2008, -0/+10Actually a majority of the footage was copyrighted. Besides the dude in red plaid, the whole video was straight from Scientology.com

      They just have huge balls over at laughordie
    • themonkman, on 05/05/2008, -0/+2IANAL (but I study it for my own enjoyment), but claiming a parody defense in court to a copyright infringement lawsuit is never a clear cut thing. What has to be determined is if it really does meet the requirements of Fair Use under 17 U.S.C § 107 (http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/17/107.html), also known as the Fair Use law. That's all nonwithstanding §106 and 106A, which determine the rights of the copyright holder/owner. Since this video wasn't produced and displayed for commercial use, and because the video was both a comment and satirical criticism, on the surface it's considering factors 1 & 2 would seem to be satisfied. The Co$ would probably argue that considering factors 3 & 4 aren't satisfied to be considered as parody because of the market impact such a video could have on it's business, and the amount of the original copyrighted work that was used in the video. Like I said, there is a fine line, and there is enough case law where people had been found innocent of copyright infringement who later were found guilty later on during the appeals.
    • tahcoboy, on 05/06/2008, -0/+1other best part at 2:05 people in the backround
  • starblink, on 05/05/2008, -6/+86More info about this wonderfull cult at:
    http://exscientologykids.com
    http://www.factnet.org/Scientology/exsci.htm
    http://www.xenu.net
  • bamafun, on 05/05/2008, -2/+18wait!!!! the scientologist told me I was the only with the virgin tears which are a delicacy on pluto .... dang they must tell everyone that
  • JlmAWP, on 05/05/2008, -2/+83I demand that we be given a full-length feature film with flannel guy spurting nothing but ridiculous and satirical ramblings. I about peed myself.
  • DrainBamaged138, on 05/05/2008, -1/+33flannel dude looked like he was ready to burst out laughing the whole time lol
    • Navicerts, on 05/05/2008, -0/+27Maybe so, but that is the "Scientology look" if you have been paying attention :)
  • str3ama, on 05/05/2008, -4/+24There's this thing called herbalife, it's a forune 500 company that sells diet pills or something, but they also run an MLM scam that's really cultish as well. A lot of Scientologists seem to peddle that stuff.
  • cheech454, on 05/05/2008, -13/+3MORE COWBELL!
  • FutureSandwhich, on 05/05/2008, -2/+8Hail Xenu
  • jordansky, on 05/05/2008, -17/+2Original in better quality: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKs-u0q467U
    • tendonut, on 05/05/2008, -1/+12"Better Quality" and "YouTube" don't belong in the same sentence, so either this is a rickroll or you are blind
      • comradeTJH, on 05/05/2008, -0/+4Well, there's that "watch in high quality" link below the movie which indeed displays the movie much better.
      • ralphthemagi, on 05/05/2008, -3/+2He's right though. It is the original, and in better quality.
        YouTube isn't the greatest, but funnyordie is even worse in general, and if I had to venture a guess I'd say that their version is simply a reencode of the YouTube version.
    • bobburn, on 05/05/2008, -0/+4'original' cult indoctrination video.
    • einrobstein, on 05/05/2008, -0/+4Scientology has the power to improve my grades from A- to solid A? SIGN ME UP!!!!!!!!!!!!
    • Karna101, on 05/05/2008, -1/+5http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKs-u0q467U

      they disabled ratings so make sure to flag the video for "spam"
  • mark076h, on 05/05/2008, -1/+40they forgot to mention that Scientology kills!
    • kuj007, on 05/05/2008, -1/+7no no no... Scientology doesn't kill people... Scientologists do.
  • kneelB4zod, on 05/05/2008, -16/+4"I breath Xenu's come"
  • comradeTJH, on 05/05/2008, -1/+130"... natural disasters like 9/11 ... " learned something new today...
    • zpliskin, on 05/05/2008, -0/+13i loled at it.
      i was like "wow these guys look almost not stupids... nevermind"
    • wrathofg0d, on 05/05/2008, -0/+3seriously what the hell
    • HenvY, on 05/05/2008, -0/+209/11 TRUTH! IT WAS A CYCLONE!
      • IpecacNeat, on 05/05/2008, -0/+1I told her not to move her body like that.
    • viewofeverlast, on 05/06/2008, -0/+1Really? Cause I thought 9/11 was the work of Xenu.... or are Xenu-related tragedies considered natural disasters?
  • lilsharkhunter, on 05/05/2008, -3/+27It's just so easy to say "Oh someone else will summon the 7 dragons of Recca..."
    • spootmonkey, on 05/05/2008, -0/+10Dude that was a flame of recca reference...didn't even notice that in the vid..sweet
      • Informationator, on 05/06/2008, -0/+2Hm... It sounded like "Seven Dragons of Reggae" to me. I've seen Flame of Recca though. Great series.
  • Tyrghast, on 05/05/2008, -2/+92so many cute girls lost to the nutcases...
    • skidooer, on 05/05/2008, -3/+1I think I went to high school with the one at 1:17.
    • ajjeffers, on 05/06/2008, -0/+0I just assumed that they are all actors.
  • Ryan0617, on 05/05/2008, -1/+207600 Light years! Haha. 5 seconds in and i'm already lolling. Great vid.
    • typon1, on 05/06/2008, -2/+3It makes my blood boil when people use light year as a unit of time. dumbasses.
      • ElGuano, on 05/06/2008, -1/+1I think that there point is exactly what flew right up over yer head there, Einstein.
      • viewofeverlast, on 05/06/2008, -1/+3Yeah I can't think of anything better to get pissed about..
  • freeboarder1402, on 05/05/2008, -2/+14i was there, killing dolphins for their delicious pancreases ........made my day
  • sroske, on 05/05/2008, -21/+5I'm convinced that the entire anonymous anti-scientology thing is actually a scientology public relations project. It is ingenious because it will snowball with copycats (like this one?) and promote scientology through the negative press. Amazing and brilliant. Hats off to them.
    • Drax0n, on 05/05/2008, -0/+8Amazing all the bad press, the lies, and the scamming of people, it sure really does help the cult take in more money.. somehow..
  • jjpertusch, on 05/05/2008, -21/+5the strange thing is that the scientologists interviewed actually made scientology seem normal.
    • CurlyMike139125, on 05/05/2008, -0/+19No! No! No! STOP THINKING LIKE THAT!!!! THAT'S WHAT THEY WANT YOU YOU BELIEVE!!!!
    • Mejari, on 05/05/2008, -0/+13if by 'normal' you mean 'we believe that 9/11 was a natural disaster'
      • jjpertusch, on 05/05/2008, -12/+1hm 'the strange thing is that the scientologists interviewed actually made scientology seem [we believe that 9/11 was a natural disaster]'. no, i think by normal i meant normal.

        im not agreeing with scientology, im making a observation. for all the ***** talking digg does on scientology, fox news and whoever else, digg doesn't tolerate a very wide range of viewpoints.
        • Mejari, on 05/05/2008, -1/+9and my point was that thinking that 2 airplanes (not large birds) crashing into two towers (constructs of man) along with another plane crashing into the Pentagon was a natural disaster is not normal, hence that throws your thesis (that they seem normal) out the window. And no, I don't suppose a lot of people here support the range of viewpoints that include the ones that let people like Lisa McPherson die horribly and covered in cockroach bites, or the ones that let people infiltrate the IRS and steal classified documents, or the viewpoints that allow the hundreds of other crimes that scientology perpetrates daily. No, I don't tolerate those viewpoints, just like I don't tolerate the KKK's viewpoints. Does that make me a bad person? I doubt it.
        • jjpertusch, on 05/05/2008, -4/+2get over yourself. i can read things on the internet too. what i said was that the people interviewed seemed normal because... they did. save your anti-scientology agenda for someone else. im not a scientologist, i dont support scientology. in fact, i agree with you, but what i said had nothing to do with scientology as a church. i was talking about the specific people in the video. also likening it to the KKK is a bit extreme. a more apt example would be the catholic church. the catholic church is responsible for a lot of heinous things and there are some crazy catholics, but there are normal catholics too.
          • Mejari, on 05/05/2008, -1/+2Dude, THE GUY IN THE VIDEO SAID 9/11 WAS A NATURAL DISASTER. He is a 'specific person in the video', is he not?
            And no, likening them to the KKK is not a bit extreme. If you are so proud of your internet-reading skills go look up the ***** they do. I agree, the Catholic church has some ***** up things about it too, but that doesn't make it ok for the scios to do it. I would ask that you find me a 'normal' scio that has actually made it far enough in the 'church' to find out about xenu. Before they reach that point it's basically a self-help group, and you can't really call them true scientologists if they don't even know what their own group believes. So please, 'get over yourself', as you so aptly put it.
          • jjpertusch, on 05/05/2008, -4/+2come on. no he didnt, he said scientology helped out at recent natural disasters then he made an attempt to list them and happened to say 9/11. it sounded like he misspoke to me. and again, i could care less about the church or the people who have made it far enough into the church. my original comment was about how these people in this video talk as if scientology were normal. i even said it was strange. basically, my initial comment could be fully supported by what you're saying. it is strange that these people, who are in a messed up organization, can talk about it like its normal. your listing of all these points that make it an evil organization just points out how strange it is.
        • themonkman, on 05/05/2008, -0/+4If tolerating a very wide range of viewpoints includes brainwashing, extortion, false imprisonment, forced child labor, pressuring women to have abortions, bodily injury due to gross negligence, dismissing cases of child rape for PR reasons, criminal acts like infiltrating the IRS and committing fraud, levying malicious lawsuits for no other purpose than to harass and drain money from others, promoting the spread of libel and slander to it's enemies without remorse or restraint, separating parents from their children for months on end and only allowing 2 hours a year to spend with immediate family, etc....then well ***** me sideways with a chainsaw. I guess I'm just closed minded.

          I think I'd be more apt to accept a "religion" that includes murdering dolphins with their bare hands for their delicious pancreases.
    • MammasMilk, on 05/05/2008, -0/+1Well it would not be very successful if they got into all their insane crap... that only happens when you've been properly initiated (read "brainwashed")
    • Harabeck, on 05/05/2008, -0/+1They said those nice things so they would get a discount on their next auditing session.
  • andergriff, on 05/05/2008, -2/+10These people need to be watched carefully. Do they vote?
  • Claypool741, on 05/05/2008, -2/+18did anybody find it odd that the original youtube video posted by the Church of Scientology has their comments disabled?
    • Mejari, on 05/05/2008, -2/+22no. why would an organization whose largest group of critics are famous for their internet antics not disable a place where said critics could post comment after comment insulting them? I mean, if they hadn't disabled comments I'd be over there right now posting 'xenu.net' over 9000 times.
    • Qumahlin, on 05/05/2008, -1/+1If by "odd" you mean "smart" then yes. When you know your material incites angry comments do you want to give the people a place to post angry comments?
    • Zerkave, on 05/06/2008, -0/+1thats $cientology for you, they don't let people see both sides of the story until the check is cashed, and even then they still tell you its only 300$ more for the next level.
  • ahpro, on 05/05/2008, -28/+1It's fake, check the channels it was posted in - Sketch, Parody and Real Life.
    • vertexoflife, on 05/05/2008, -0/+15No *****, Captain Obvious.
    • ATLien74, on 05/05/2008, -0/+14Really?! I thought everything on Funny or Die was completely serious.
    • MaddieCakes, on 05/05/2008, -0/+12Whoa whoa whoa wait, do you know who Superman is? Whoa, I think I'm feeling something here. Are you aware of Garfield?
  • BraveQuail, on 05/05/2008, -1/+8finally something on funny or die that is actually funny!
    • B3000, on 05/05/2008, -0/+1What? You mean the million and two "Pearl: The True Hollywood Story" sketches weren't actually funny?
    • mfratz, on 05/05/2008, -0/+1Yes...many have died in their futile attempt to be funny.
  • theplainestguy, on 05/05/2008, -2/+13Co$ takes no comments. Afraid of criticizers, they criticizes. Cowards
  • Jondi10, on 05/05/2008, -2/+8I give this video 2 thumbs up and then 3 bonus thumbs that I transform out of my other fingers.
  • robotto, on 05/05/2008, -1/+94 Wow those chicks looks hot, but too bad they are retarded.
    • jc7012, on 05/05/2008, -0/+38even better...
      • ADHD, on 05/05/2008, -3/+2Psh I know, ***** schizo is saying that like its a bad thing

        "Yeah hun, Xenu is scared of ass rape so if he sees we celebrate it here he wont come to earth"
  • MarkayBayan, on 05/05/2008, -2/+11LULZ = one of the greatest weapons against the cult.
  • aserer511, on 05/05/2008, -6/+2"Dude, you're getting a thetan!" can some that video up
  • alpha88, on 05/05/2008, -9/+5***** LOL.

    But seriously, I give it 23 minutes before it's taken down by the cult. COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT GUISE.
  • aenima987, on 05/05/2008, -3/+429/11 was a natural disaster?
    • LongLiveRock2, on 05/05/2008, -1/+2So, terrorists blowing up buildings is God's way of punishing us?
      • Mejari, on 05/05/2008, -0/+2replace God with Xenu and you're right on track. Or is he still locked in intergalactic jail? It's so hard to keep straight these days.
      • sovietninja, on 05/05/2008, -2/+1GOD =/= Nature

        GOD = WAR
      • agentlame, on 05/05/2008, -0/+1What? Why would you default to God if it wasn't nature?
        Ever think it might have been those pesky 'terrorists' and their free will?
    • glutamate, on 05/05/2008, -0/+1I noticed that too.
  • ryannerd, on 05/05/2008, -2/+13And the Academy Award for best satire acting goes to: Plaid Shirt Guy!!!
    Thanks Digg for making my day!
  • ATLien74, on 05/05/2008, -1/+25I just dropped the thetans off at the pool, and now I am clear.
  • exeprime, on 05/05/2008, -13/+3Kinda lame actually. I've seen alot better bashes of COS.
  • LongLiveRock2, on 05/05/2008, -9/+25I can't decide who to hate more Scientology or PETA!
    • NSResponder, on 05/05/2008, -7/+2Not a hard call. PETA's never killed any human beings, AFAIK.

      -jcr
      • Jus7in, on 05/05/2008, -3/+4Stop signing off...
      • twertyto, on 05/06/2008, -2/+5Just keep burying this egomaniac.
        • NSResponder, on 05/06/2008, -6/+1Sure thing. Not clear why you want to be buried, but I'll oblige.

          -jcr
    • ADHD, on 05/05/2008, -0/+5PETA

      scientology is natural selection at work
      • NSResponder, on 05/06/2008, -1/+2I wish you wouldn't take such a callous attitude towards the victims of a criminal nut-cult. Don't forget that a lot of scientologists had no choice; their parents were already wrapped up in Hubbard's insanity when they were born.

        -jcr
    • pencilneck, on 05/06/2008, -1/+3How about a PETA member who is a Scientologist... and does Amway multi level marketing.
      • NSResponder, on 05/06/2008, -1/+2..and uses a Franklin Planner.

        -jcr
    • xenosteel, on 05/06/2008, -2/+1RIAA !
  • removesstains, on 05/05/2008, -0/+1Man if i really need to find a hot chick to date, i'm going to the CO$. I bet they'll just blue ball me anyway.
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