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Michael Jackson, King of Pop Dead at 12

theonion.com — How could The Onion not make this? :)

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13 Comments

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  • prius04, on 06/26/2009, -0/+5My first reaction to this was mild disgust. Then I read it and cried. Michael seems to have died of sycophancy. This story speaks to that, I think. Too bad there wasn't someone there for Michael who could help him grow up. Just think what the world would have seen then.
  • kerouac906, on 06/28/2009, -0/+4It's funny because it's true...
  • Testiculese, on 07/01/2009, -0/+4I think that's pretty accurate, Jackson's mental age was stuck around 12yo. I saw some Christmas video of him in his own house in his early 30's. Some servants decorated it. His demeanor and movements/use of hands was exactly of a 12yo girl. "Wow! That's pretty!" "Wow! That's cool!" "Wow! That's pretty!" "Wow! That's pretty!" "Wow! That's bright!". Poor guy could have anything he wanted when he grew up, but never seemed to have grown up. (I don't know if he had degraded to this mental state from normality or not, though)
  • improvono, on 06/26/2009, -1/+3They didn't waste a second did they?
  • vault, on 06/29/2009, -1/+3This is retarded.
  • BlackSheep720, on 06/27/2009, -0/+1i see that you have discovered the internet.
  • nymphetamine, on 06/27/2009, -0/+1que?
  • Frnnkdlxx, on 07/01/2009, -1/+1If only his rabid supporters had committed suicide when Michael was twelve, we could save ourselves this misery and grief of him still being in the public eye, instead of...oh? Maybe reporting that the Banker bailout has cost the U.S. $14.8 trillion to date
  • goosemanrocks, on 06/29/2009, -2/+1too soon.
  • fender01, on 06/26/2009, -4/+2Gotta love The Onion!
  • MBomber50, on 06/27/2009, -4/+1You're either new to the internet or missed the giant onion logos...
  • wraiyne, on 06/27/2009, -4/+1i guess im not the only one who doesnt care about one more death in the world...
  • planetkestrel, on 06/26/2009, -9/+0Fawcett and Jackson! Two Charlie's Angels stars dead in one day! It's just too much to bear! My sympathies go out to their families, Frederick Forsythe and Jacqlyn Smith.

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