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141 Comments
- colincornaby, on 09/06/2008, -15/+61Apple Geniuses fix things on your computer.
Microsoft Gurus try to sell you more crap.
Not the same thing. - elveis, on 09/06/2008, -10/+51...........................................________
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..................................., - chase129, on 09/05/2008, -5/+45Awkward... And Bill Gates shaking his ass is gonna give me nightmares
- diggenerate, on 09/06/2008, -8/+45Instead of trying to make Vista look like a better option, they should be making Vista better and not wasting their money on crappy advertisements.
- lafolieverte, on 09/07/2008, -1/+33customer: "Hi, something is jacked up with my Windows PC"
MS guru: "Okay let's just format that ***** and reinstall!" - jwdav, on 09/06/2008, -4/+36So Guru's sell 'em up and Geek Squad f**ks 'em up?
I think they missed the point of servicing what you sell ... geeks pointing at gurus and gurus pointing at geeks.
This should end well. - tetsuo29, on 09/06/2008, -12/+43I see. So, after years of making sure that they never had to help people with their (mostly) crappy OSes- because they shrugged this responsibility off onto the hardware makers, Microsoft now realizes that people want help with their computers and that they are willing to pay Apple for this. Well, they've copied Apple at everything else, so why not this.
Here's why it won't work. A Mac Genius (which I admit is a poor choice of job title) not only can help you troubleshoot a computer, but when they determine that something is actually defective, then they can a) service it or b) send it in for service. Unless Microsoft is going to make some arrangements with Dell, HP, Gateway, Acer, Lenovo, Toshiba, your local shop selling whitebox systems, etc. all they are going to be able to do when they determine a problem is tell you to contact your hardware manufacturer who will probably want to repeat all of the troubleshooting that the Microsoft Guru did before they will replace any hardware. Come to think of it, this is exactly like the new interface 'improvements' in Vista- all a bunch of needless fluff you have to click through before you can finally get to the same old control panels and settings screens you needed in the first place.
A few predictions. Microsoft Gurus will spend a lot of time:
- turning off UAC
- disabling needless Aero effects
- running System Restore to return Vista to the state it was in just prior to the last Windows updates
- explaining to customers that the only way to further improve Vistas performance would be to turn off the 45 different DRM agents running the background
- helping customers exercise their Windows XP downgrade rights
- formatting hard drives, reloading Windows, and explaining to customers the importance of anti-malware software
- saying things like, 'Gee, I don't know why people put up with this. I myself am now a Mac user.' - rebotfc, on 09/06/2008, -4/+30These 'guru's are just going to be Best Buy staff in a MS Guru T shirt.
- Berkana, on 09/07/2008, -8/+32Apple is Microsoft's R&D department.
- djeckhart, on 09/06/2008, -6/+27Man, that's just embarrassing.
- inactive, on 09/06/2008, -12/+27Oh, brother. Microsoft reminds me of the McCain campaign.
- nbouma, on 09/07/2008, -0/+12customer: "Hi....
...ah screw it - LeviTheSmith, on 09/07/2008, -0/+12customer: "Hi, something is jacked up with my Windows PC"
MS guru: "Okay let's just format that ***** and reinstall!" - foofightrs777, on 09/07/2008, -4/+15Have you used Vista on a daily basis since SP1?
- h0tpot, on 09/06/2008, -4/+14I plan on hijacking one of these shirts and wearing it to work one day.
- theotheragentm, on 09/07/2008, -0/+10An honest question here. How do you answer the question, "Why did Microsoft's update make my computer blue screen?" This is less common now, but my answer has always been, "This just happens sometimes." Is that really good marketing, having your geniuses point out these flaws?
- judicar, on 09/07/2008, -2/+12Instead of black turtlenecks it will be ill-fitting sport jackets and pocket protectors.
- Berkana, on 09/06/2008, -8/+18Ah yes, Swamiji Steveballmerananda and his crew of gurus. Splended. Jai, Steve, jai!
/sarcasmgasm - Spuy767, on 09/07/2008, -6/+16I've been to plenty of apple stores, and I have yet to be harassed to buy something.
- reugeneg, on 09/07/2008, -3/+12Microsoft had a "store" at the Metreon in San Francisco... By week two, tumbleweeds were blowing through that place. I'm not sure if the store lasted a year.
- Elshar, on 09/07/2008, -2/+11Yea, except the average person with a cheap on-sale computer HAS an onboard video card with no or crappy hardware acceleration.
- samimnot, on 09/07/2008, -2/+10I thought the very first line in this article was the most compelling:
“Although they (Microsoft) won't be fixing existing users computers”
Meaning, MS Gurus WILL NOT be helping “any existing consumers” that unfortunately bought the garbage MS Software currently on the market. So unless you’re buying a new computer, MS feels like helping you is a complete waste of their time...because they know the only answer to existing customer’s problems is to “REPLACE” the software they've already wasted their money on.
I think that about sums it up ;-) - jasmus, on 09/07/2008, -2/+9Or you installed free software like itunes and quicktime. Before you say you have to have it for your ipod, there are plenty of viable alternatives to ipods out there, and itunes / quicktime is part of owning an ipod, so chose something else if you don't like the the way it works.
- sarchosis, on 09/07/2008, -2/+9At least Guru's a semi-decent name, with Microsoft's piss poor marketing department I would have thought they'd call them "Experts" or something else bland.
- DarkShroud, on 09/07/2008, -9/+16They are, Vista SP1 had a lot of performance updates that had rolled out during that first year. Only the people who actually used Vista from the start actually saw it steadily improving until SP1 launched.
- renegadeafk, on 09/07/2008, -1/+7Dark shroud is right Windows 7 is a relativity minor update to vista and will be a lot like vista. People that "hate" vista dn think xp is so awesome won't like windows 7 either.
- inactive, on 09/07/2008, -3/+9"UAC actually protects a persons' PC."
No it doesn't. It just adds another "nag" dialogue that the Windows Wankers just "click through". It offers no real protection at all. It's really funny that the nastiest new malware specifically targets Vista. It's so full of security holes that it's easier to compromise than XP.
Game Over, Microsoft. - incorrect, on 09/07/2008, -0/+6This makes sense, at least to me.
Genius I associate more with Science whereas Guru is more aligned with Religion.
This of course is counter to the common perception of Apple users. - deadbaby, on 09/07/2008, -1/+7It's going to be hard for these guys to answer questions about all the different models of Windows computers, combined with all the different editions of Vista, combined with the massive amount of third party hardware out there. Good luck...
- asdfer, on 09/07/2008, -4/+9It is likely that Microsoft's Guru will turn out like Mike Myer's "Love Guru": both are LAME and FAILURES!
- chesscat, on 09/07/2008, -1/+6I don't agree. I think his list hits the nail on the head.
- Kelmon, on 09/07/2008, -3/+8In contrast, Apple's store staff that I have spoken to have advised against purchases that I was looking at because they weren't right for my requirements. Damned if I've ever met other sales staff that talk themselves out of a sale on purpose. Due to this I have a high degree of respect for Apple's store staff in the stores that I've visited.
Sheffield, Meadow Hall (GB) and Birmingham, Bull Ring (GB), if you are interested. - jwdav, on 09/07/2008, -0/+5I haven't finished thanking AOL for that yet ...
- nakile, on 09/07/2008, -3/+8This will be fun. If Apple Stores supposedly have employees who are trendy, collage age students who hang around Starbucks...
...Then the MS Stores will be full of 16-18 year old dip ***** gamers who will tell people their computer is garbage because it "doesn't have enough graphics chips." - btschul, on 09/07/2008, -1/+6Does notepad really take up that much of of your system's resources?
- lead2thehead, on 09/07/2008, -2/+7If they were really gurus, they wouldn't be working at Best Buy.
- nbouma, on 09/07/2008, -7/+12customer: "Hi, something is jacked up with my Windows PC"
MS guru: "Okay let's just format that ***** and reinstall!"
...just in case you didn't catch the previous two comments - inactive, on 09/07/2008, -5/+10MS really have no chance whatsoever of "making Vista better" Vista is a broken mess, still based on the nasty 1991 NT kernel (thrown together in 18 days by Dave Cutler to "get something working"). Windows 7 is supposed to be based on a new kernel bought in from another company...
Don't hold your breath - Windows 7 will be as bad or worse than Vista. MS now have NO viable products.
Game Over, Microsoft. - sfacets, on 09/07/2008, -1/+5I wonder how many of those will be committing suicide over the next year as users start flocking in?
- ohplease, on 09/07/2008, -0/+4
With Vista SP1 they removed right click search, which could be used to search a subdirectory. It's like Microsoft is daring me to uninstall Vista at this point. - totorototoro, on 09/07/2008, -4/+8Those don't sound like Apple Geniuses. Those sound like Apple Concierges, who just spout the inane talking points, and point you to the Apple Geniuses for any actual technical questions/customer support.
http://www.apple.com/retail/ - krustytroll, on 09/07/2008, -0/+4customer: "hi my pc isn't working!"
ms guru: "can it play crysis?"
customer:" well yes, i've played it on my pc a couple of times."
ms guru: "then your pc is working fine. there's no problem with it."
customer:"wtf?" - Khast, on 09/07/2008, -1/+5XP still has just about everything installed, except the language packs. I am talking about bare bones, no Calculator, no notepad, no media player, no web browser. (Think back to the days of Windows 95...you could tell it what to install and what not to install...you had the options.) Install what you need, nothing more. XP, if stripped of all it's crap (and I mean crap) takes up less than 200MB and purrs like a kitten. Boots in a very short period of time. Tell me why I need to have the driver database installed on the computer, I don't have over 100 printers, 100 monitors, 30 sound cards, ect...why do I need the OS to keep those drivers in the hard drive. I can see USB having a somewhat large database, but most devices are either detected as a camera, hard drive, ect. The rest require a CD/DVD to install drivers anyways.
Vista should have a "Shave off the fat" option which removes EVERYTHING which is unused from the OS. Then it too might run more efficiently... - nicktx, on 09/07/2008, -6/+10Nah, Vista is going to be awkwardly pushed aside just like the bloated and crappy Windows Me was as soon as Windows7 comes out. Microsoft knows Vista is pretty much done, the new PCs will have it but whoever still has XP has no intention to move to Vista.
- cjschmidt, on 09/07/2008, -3/+6Not only is this a blatant rip-off of Apple, they totally miss the point:
A "Genius" can fix your computer with smarts and a little knowledge.
A "Guru" uses some mystical power/knowledge to cast out the demons lurking in the box under your desk. - diggenerate, on 09/07/2008, -0/+3Vista was preloaded on a laptop I bought and I saw no marked improvement when i "upgraded" to SP1.
- kreatre2007, on 09/07/2008, -0/+3They are easier to use but, if you ever switch from one OS to another, you'll notice that you are in unfamiliar territory and may need help from time to time. Apple created the Mac Genius position in the retail stores because for years, customers didn't have someone to go to for support who actually knew Macs. All of the Mac Geniuses are Apple certified techs and they are chosen from people who have been long time Mac users. I used to work as a Mac Genius. The team that I worked with was a very talented group. No one in the industry comes close to the service and support that is received from the Mac Geniuses. That is a fact. Just look at Apple's customer satisfaction ratings.
Your comment was really stupid. - Turbojugend27, on 09/07/2008, -8/+11Training for Guru's. Recommend Apple.
- afruff23, on 09/07/2008, -1/+4I wish I could go to collage...
- btschul, on 09/06/2008, -13/+16I think that the fact that Microsoft is doing everything they can to be more like Apple just proves once and for all that Apple is better than Microsoft.
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