TUMBLING DOWN THAT HILL

A Singer With The Most Cursed Cover Of 'Running Up That Hill,' And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'

A Singer With The Most Cursed Cover Of 'Running Up That Hill,' And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'
This week we've also got a coffee chain launching crypto "coffee experiences," an unwitting NIMBY, a tired movie director and a guy with a questionable "scientific" take on mermaids.
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Every day somebody says or does something that earns them the scorn of the internet. Here at Digg, as part of our mission to curate what the internet is talking about right now, we rounded up the main characters on Twitter from this past week and held them accountable for their actions.



This week’s characters include a singer’s truly cursed rendition of “Running Up That Hill,” a coffee chain launching crypto “coffee experiences,” an unwitting NIMBY, a very tired movie director and a guy with quite the “scientific” take on mermaids.



Sunday

Rita Ora

The character: Rita Ora, singer, Vecna nightmare-vision version of a Kate Bush impersonator

The plot: At her Rock in Rio set last weekend, Rita Ora performed a cover of Kate Bush’s iconic 1985 song “Running Up That Hill” — which was recently rocketed back onto the charts by its inclusion in season 4 of the Netflix show “Stranger Things” — and, folks, it decidedly did not slap.

A particular clip of Ora’s performance went viral, in which she gratuitously vocalizes the lyrics of the song with an unrecognizable melody (reminiscent of a certain someone’s 2018 rendition of the National Anthem and caps it all off by getting down onto her stomach, kicking her feet up and pursuing her lips into a kiss for the audience.



It’s really quite painful.

The repercussion: Look, no one’s saying Rita Ora can’t sing; there’s no question she’s got a great set of pipes on her. But there was simply no need to do this to Kate Bush. So people had a lot of fun with this one.



Molly Bradley



Monday

Starbucks Odyssey: NFT Coffee Experiences

The character: Starbucks, coffee chain, multinational corporation, crypto sheep

The plot: With everyone and their grandma getting involved in crypto, it comes as little surprise that Starbucks has recently jumped on the trend (though considerably later than everyone else). On Monday, the coffee giant announced the launch of Starbucks Odyssey, a new program that allows members to earn and buy NFTs “that will unlock access to new, immersive coffee experiences.”



My favorite kinds of experiences are coffee experiences.

For a company that claims to care deeply about its environmental impact, the decision to pursue such energy-intensive technology is a puzzling one. Even after reading the press release, it’s still not entirely clear why their rewards program needs to involve Web3 tech — but what is clear is that Starbucks anticipated criticism and/or mockery, because they turned off Twitter replies for the tweet.


The repercussion: They were correct to anticipate criticism and/or mockery.



Darcy Jimenez




Kevin Drum

The character: Kevin Drum, blogger, former RadioShack employee, vocal NIMBY

The plot: Kevin Drum, a blogger whose work has appeared in Mother Jones and other places, inserted himself into a conversation about housing and population in American cities brought out the urban planning twitter court jesters.

“Is NYC obligated to accommodate any level of population growth? Why?” Drum asked in response to a tweet about housing costs and supply problems.



Drum wanted to know why a city like New York should keep building housing if the population isn’t increasing at the same pace — and questioned if the residents wanted it too. Well actually, overall, the population is rising at around the same rate and when you consider high-income metros, like NYC, housing rates do fall behind.



The repercussion: It looks like Drum, stubborn as he was, tweeted in good faith and wasn’t trying to create a ruckus. Let’s give him that. But he did get pilloried for his takes.



Adwait Patil




Wednesday

Baz Lurhmann

The character: Baz Luhrmann, writer, director, Elvis fan, tired Australian

The plot: After “Elvis” was available for home rental, Baz Luhrmann gave an interview in which he revealed there might be a four hour cut of the movie. But he’s just too tired to work on it. We don’t blame him, doing things is hard, especially redoing them after you already did them.



The repercussion: Thankfully, this is one of the lightest and funniest reactions to a Main Character we’ve ever seen, because people seem to be in on the joke. In a playful way, fans of “Elvis,” Elvis and Baz were disappointed to learn that they could get more of that movie, so they’re egging him on to do so. In a tongue-in-cheek way, I think. I hope.



Jared Russo




Matt Walsh

The character:  Matt Walsh, transphobic provocateur, Disney adult, not the funny actor from “Veep

The plot: Matt Walsh, while taking a break from organizing an intimidation campaign against Boston Children’s Hospital for providing care to trans youth and being showered with praise from JK Rowling, decided to turn his attention to Disney’s live-action remake of “The Little Mermaid,” which stars Black actress Halle Bailey as Ariel, and criticized the casting decision.

"With ‘The Little Mermaid,’ can we just mention that, from a scientific perspective, it doesn't make a lot of sense to have someone with darker skin who lives deep in the ocean," Walsh said.



The repercussion: Walsh’s so-called “scientific” commentary on why mermaids couldn’t be Black was widely disseminated  across the Twitterverse by Media Matters’ Jason Campbell and greeted with mockery and derision. Many netizens clowned on the 36-year-old for being so fixated over the choice to cast a Black actress as a mythical half-human sea creature.



Walsh took his Main Character designation in stride, by saying he enjoyed triggering the Left over his comments.



James Crugnale



———

Read the previous edition of our One Main Character column, which included a guy who thinks everyone misses high school as much as he does, a lawyer who doesn’t think anyone has pronouns and more.

Did we miss a main character from this week? Please send tips to [email protected].

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