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75 Comments
- uHaveASmallDigg, on 02/05/2009, -0/+52FTA: Mr Sharkey told a Rochester police sergeant who called him last August that he was a vampire "who needs to drink human blood for strength."
He and his lawyer must have hit it off. - mikbunn, on 02/05/2009, -0/+46Anyone who thinks that they are a vampire is ***** retarded.
- ohhaiitsryan, on 02/05/2009, -0/+43ok... so 44 yr old former governor candidate pro-wrestling vampire stalks 16 yr old girl on myspace... per se.
- inactive, on 02/05/2009, -2/+40LMAO. Where do they come up with this stuff?
- DarkBlueAnt, on 02/05/2009, -0/+32This slays me.
- seeversjm, on 02/05/2009, -0/+27I thought this was from "The Onion" before clicking the link...
- botanist, on 02/05/2009, -1/+28Seriously even The Onion can't make up gold like this. lol
- zirce, on 04/04/2009, -0/+24I'm surprised the article saw the light of day.
- diggforworld, on 02/05/2009, -0/+24What the *****.
- mikbunn, on 02/05/2009, -1/+21This guy has a lot at stake. It's a bad situation but there's surely a silver lining.
- skersh, on 02/05/2009, -0/+19This story does not reflect my life at all.
- RapeApe, on 02/05/2009, -1/+17Why don't they arrest the girl? Since when was hunting vampires legal? Vampires aren't second class citizens!
- Feroh, on 02/05/2009, -1/+16How much cash do you think he'll be coffin up for the settlement?
- mikbunn, on 02/05/2009, -2/+15He's a 44 year old deluded loser courting a 16 year old pile of angsty idiocy. I imagine they're both fat, too. Welcome to the internet.
- rsHoratio, on 02/05/2009, -0/+12"He was supposed to appear in court in August, but got a delay by saying he had been hurt in a pro wrestling match."
What the *****. - Shokker04, on 02/05/2009, -0/+10My name is Vampyr now, per se.
Seriously, the pro wrestling injury just took it over the top for me. I can't stop giggling at all the wrong choices this man has made in his life. - Induane, on 02/05/2009, -0/+9She said that in a desperate attempt to get him to leave her alone and not because she really thought she was a vampire hunter.
- Zippo, on 02/05/2009, -0/+8What a bloodsucking whore.
- lelebelle, on 02/05/2009, -1/+8It worked for Buffy and Spike...Kind of.
- skinneej, on 02/05/2009, -0/+7Everyone's got a stake in that guy's future.
...I'll get my coat. - angusm, on 02/05/2009, -0/+6"OK, sir ... I need you to put down the Anne Rice novel and switch off "True Blood" ... and you, miss ... back away from the Stephanie Meyer book ... let's do this nice and slow now, and keep your fangs where I can see them. Now I need you both to follow me outside, to a place called the Real World. Yes, I know it's daytime. No, you won't both turn into ash when the sunlight hits you ... you'll just have to trust me on that one ... OK, easy there, buddy ... yeah, that's just a picket fence, not a row of stakes. Stay calm, you're both doing great. Now, if you'll just step into the vehicle, I'll drive you both downtown to the court-ordered rehab program, where you'll learn to spell 'vampire' without a 'y' and wear clothing that isn't black. You can leave the cape behind, sir. You won't be needing that any more."
- Kerrigore, on 02/05/2009, -0/+6Just another day on the internetz imo
- TheEpicChocobo, on 07/28/2009, -0/+6What's this world come to when you can't even be a vampire online anymore.
- Tyrghast, on 02/05/2009, -0/+6Per se
- inactive, on 02/05/2009, -0/+6A 92 year old corpse of a young girl, or a fresh corpse of a 92 year old woman?
- MelissaOfTroy, on 02/05/2009, -0/+6When I was in junior high my friend was obsessed with Buffy the Vampire Slayer and thought she was a slayer. There was also a girl a year older than us who dressed like a vampire, with fangs and a cape and everything. My friend tried to recruit a bunch of people to actually go kill her with a wooden stake. Thank God everyone she asked told her she was crazy or she might have actually murdered the poor girl, who dropped the vampire thing eventually was was pretty normal in high school.
- bxzcd, on 02/05/2009, -1/+6It seems like myspace is a mecca for tards and pervs.
- inactive, on 02/05/2009, -0/+5i wonder if he shops at hot topic
- SenorBudd, on 02/05/2009, -0/+5Every girl's fantasy. :\ So many of 'em are reading vampire fictional novels now.
- protogenxl, on 02/05/2009, -0/+5This is how you deal with vamp kids
Step 1
http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/210824/
Step 2
http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/210827/ - nydwarf, on 02/06/2009, -0/+4I'm so glad they broke up before they could breed.
- digitalpencil, on 02/05/2009, -1/+5prolonged isolation from ordinary human beings can manifest itself in many strange ways.. these people are just REALLY lonely and I guess were always a bit weird and probably bullied for most of their lives. for some reason a lot of these individuals seem to find solace in the occult? I guess the idea of being a witch or a vampire allows them to feel powerful and in control of situations they simply cannot fully comprehend.
sad really, not just that they want to believe that they're witches but that a little human contact and understanding could've probably alleviated the entire stigma.
that said though, 44 and 16? sounds like this dude is ***** up in more ways than one.. - danwallace, on 02/05/2009, -0/+4This article seems to ignore the fact that he's 44 and she's 16. That's wrong on too many levels.
- JohnBlonn, on 02/05/2009, -0/+4In every generation there is a Chosen One. She alone will stand against the vampires, the demons, and the forces of darkness. She is the Slayer.
- zyklon, on 02/05/2009, -0/+4They're only together through professional courtesy.
- o1001o1001o, on 02/05/2009, -0/+4LOL VAMPIRES HAVE MYSPACE
- skersh, on 02/05/2009, -0/+4Actually, I'm Canadian.
:``(
(the extra tear is your mascara running) - mikbunn, on 02/05/2009, -0/+4He didn't build up enough strength by drinking blood I guess.
- GerardJDeMarco, on 02/05/2009, -2/+628 years i was in the legacy biz. i scraped and scratched for stories like that (closest i came was "necroboy has sex with 92-yr-old corpse in hospital."
- scoobycarolan, on 02/05/2009, -0/+4Thats a WAY better title
- irvin666, on 02/06/2009, -0/+3Must have been a grand opening to Hot Topic recently.
- buddamus, on 02/07/2009, -0/+3Some people really do need lives
- Hotrox, on 02/05/2009, -0/+3How do you charge with felony harassment and two misdemeanors (coercion with a threat to inflict bodily harm and coercion with a threat to expose a secret or disgrace), that which exists outside the legal system of mortal men?
Per se. - thetrev, on 02/05/2009, -1/+4buried for usual british tabloid nonsense.
- lysdexic, on 02/05/2009, -0/+3There's a documentary about this clown.
http://www.myspace.com/theimpalermovie
And don't miss the pic of The Impaler with Jeb Bush
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseacti ... - simpleid, on 02/06/2009, -0/+3For once it was legit!!! YES!! I knew this day would come! >:D
- mikbunn, on 02/05/2009, -0/+358m Google hits for "Vampire"
3m hits for "Vampyre"
U.S.A! U.S.A! U.S.A! - forbjok, on 02/05/2009, -0/+3TheOnion goes by many names these days.
- inactive, on 02/05/2009, -0/+2Mmm... impossible love - like Romeo & Juliet, or the Jedi & Sith.
- Jlaugh, on 02/05/2009, -0/+2He's been groomed since birth for the office, he's not there by accident.
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