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Man cuts off penis in restaurant
news.bbc.co.uk — A man cut off his penis with a kitchen knife in a packed London restaurant while Pizza lovers watched on in horror.
jonwinstanley- 1773 diggs
- digg it
- chingy1788, on 10/12/2007, -157/+14nothing was said about a penis being cut off...
only his groin was slashed
not to mention wrist and numerous stabbings... to himself
damn... I had a mean joke prepped up...
ahh hell I'll just say it
"Here Sir, your Meat Lovers Pizza is ready"- pevensen, on 10/12/2007, -4/+179The article says "It is understood surgeons were unable to reattach his penis," so it does sound like it had been cut off.
- Plasmatica, on 10/12/2007, -37/+6Dude must've lost a bet or something...and his mind probably...and now his penis too...Haha!
- senorcool, on 10/12/2007, -35/+23Hey, I didn't ask for salami on my pizza...
- CraigB12, on 10/12/2007, -6/+110I live in Mass, and I listen to talk radio on the way to work in the morning. One of the guys started reading this story and it went something like this, "So a guy is dining out at a restaurant, when he gets up and walks into the kitchen to get a 10" butcher knife. He doesn't brandish it to the chef or waiters or anything, but guess what he does?" other guy answers, "Cuts his steak with it?" to which it's replied "No, he jumps up on the table and pulls his pants down, and cuts off his genitalia."
I just sat there driving for about 10 minutes with my mouth wide open ignorant to any reasoning as to why someone would do this... i still don't have the information. - kevrose, on 10/12/2007, -23/+0I am not a eunuch!!!
- airquotes, on 10/12/2007, -24/+4Use linux!
- nyx210, on 10/12/2007, -6/+206Darwin wins again! Now he won't be able to contaminate the world with his stupidity...
- kLacK, on 10/12/2007, -9/+156Someone order a large pepperoni?
- Pac56, on 10/12/2007, -5/+131If someone asks you, "Cake or Cut Your Dick Off?", you always answer CAKE!!!
- rtay150, on 10/12/2007, -15/+3He must have REALLY wanted pepperoni on his pizza.
- HalFTW, on 10/12/2007, -14/+1"Darwin wins again! Now he won't be able to contaminate the world with his stupidity..."
In theory he could, his testicles still work I guess. - tituspullo71, on 10/12/2007, -12/+1HE WANTED PEPPERONI!
- Afreyt, on 10/12/2007, -6/+24In evolutionary terms, this is called "purifying selection", and the trait being selected against is extreme values of "doesn't take care of own reproductive equipment"
- AnotherThought, on 10/12/2007, -9/+3Italian sausage anyone?
- over9, on 10/12/2007, -4/+11http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2005530066,00.html
Reminds of this. Man cuts off his testicles after his team wins a rugby match - skyfire1, on 10/12/2007, -17/+8...But will it blend?
- texpundit, on 10/12/2007, -4/+11You cut cake at a birthday party...but you do NOT cut sausage at a sausage party.
- Foamator, on 10/12/2007, -8/+24Pics or it didn't happen!
Wait... nevermind. - undyboy91, on 10/12/2007, -5/+3Perhaps he needed an extra dollar fifty.
- WiZZLa, on 10/12/2007, -7/+5Oh Snip!
...and Aqua Teen Hunger Force - episode 59 season 4 production ode: 404 "Dickesode" http://video.glath.com/view/ATHF.Dickesode - MrEguy, on 10/12/2007, -2/+6Bloody horrible. Literally.
- tunacubes, on 10/12/2007, -4/+15Please no "pics or it didn't happen" jokes..
- sanman, on 10/12/2007, -4/+1Damn workplace accidents
- amercer, on 10/12/2007, -3/+2I really could have done without reading that headline.
- Vectorphobe, on 10/12/2007, -8/+2So an English guy walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The guy looks at him and says, "GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!111!1!"
Get it? - TheCount, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4I wonder if every guy in the restaurant let out a collective groan when he did it...
- Intrexed, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4At first glance I thought it read: "A man cut off his penis with a kitchen knife in a packed London restaurant while Penis lovers watched on in horror."
- yahoofrom, on 10/12/2007, -2/+14he played video games
- MrDash001, on 10/12/2007, -3/+1I heard he is lorena bobitts cousin.
- TheMidnight, on 10/12/2007, -1/+5Dear Penis,
I don't think I like you anymore...
Sincerely,
Rodney
In other news, no one in that restaurant ever ordered sausage again. - SarahC, on 10/12/2007, -7/+0Pic's or it didn't happen?
REALLY NOT SAFE FOR WORK & WLL MAKE YOUR EYES BLEED! (Kind of related video... though not the one in question)
http://www.flurl.com/item/Hatchet_vs_Genitals_u_199612 - HellifIno, on 10/12/2007, -1/+5DO NOT WATCH THAT VIDEO!!
I'm not bothered by much I see on videos, but that one haunted me for a few days. Fortunately I last saw it several months ago, so I'm better now. But seriously. Just don't. - MrEguy, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3@ HellifIno: Thanks for the warning. I'll pass on that video. I learned my lesson after watching the Nick Berg beheading in 2004 ... THAT imagery was really difficult to banish from my mind.
- jonwinstanley, on 06/09/2008, -33/+3I think the joke may still stand - "It is understood surgeons were unable to reattach his penis."
- Tr33fiddy, on 10/12/2007, -6/+68not a lot else will stand after that though.
- TroubleInMind, on 10/12/2007, -10/+4New meme alert.
- mehbored, on 10/12/2007, -11/+4Pain Olympics wannabe...
- inukki, on 10/12/2007, -6/+1what is pain olympics? you mean sado-machochism?
- YusufYusuf, on 10/12/2007, -7/+3FINISH HIM!!!
- tinker123, on 10/12/2007, -13/+56Those wacky Brits
- ponk, on 10/12/2007, -31/+8The man was actually Polish. The same article was in numerous newspapers
- daishin, on 10/12/2007, -4/+61@ponk
The article clearly states it happened in London so the "crazy brits" comment still stands much like when someone in the US does something retarded and people say "Only in America"; no one points out the guys origin of birth. - humperdeath, on 10/12/2007, -9/+3Mmmmmmmmmmm.....Sausage!
- Daniel001, on 10/12/2007, -5/+20@tinker
I think cutting off your own penis goes beyond wacky. - joeydoo, on 10/12/2007, -6/+3"The article clearly states it happened in London so the "crazy brits" comment still stands much like when someone in the US does something retarded and people say "Only in America"; no one points out the guys origin of birth."
I would think that "those crazy humans" would work better. As you said, the guy's origin of birth doesn't matter. - wyrdness, on 10/12/2007, -6/+3The guy was apparently Polish, not British.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,,2064406,00.html - Toloran, on 10/12/2007, -2/+4@wyrdness
So it would be a polish sausage then? - po43292, on 10/12/2007, -5/+1What, no Pollock jokes?
- mandarin, on 10/12/2007, -3/+117The food was that bad eh?
- kaelyiesta, on 10/12/2007, -5/+95well it was a british restaurant...
only kidding, it was a humor joke - stvspl, on 10/12/2007, -3/+154humor jokes are the best kind.
- neuropsychguy, on 10/12/2007, -25/+7"humor jokes are the best kind."
Yep, much better than the non-humor ones. - Feanor, on 10/12/2007, -4/+37You have to say it so the Brits will understand - "humour"
- spawnfree, on 10/12/2007, -6/+4yeah, anguish jokes are horrible.
- AICkieran, on 10/12/2007, -9/+1As opposed to what?
American humour? Where you have to take the piss out of someone to be 'funny', try wit my friends. - cmscott, on 10/12/2007, -2/+4Yeah, Mr. Bean was the wittiest...
- pifko87, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2Mr. Bean is a GOD here in the UK. We'll have no disrespectful sarcastic comments about the lord thank you cmscott. You will be punished in the afterlife.
- kaelyiesta, on 10/12/2007, -5/+95well it was a british restaurant...
- CbME, on 10/12/2007, -72/+4If this man ever goes to jail, there will be now be three choices for raping!
- ponk, on 10/12/2007, -3/+114theres so many things I dont understand about what you just said
- MOJIRA, on 05/17/2008, -3/+16You sound like one those descriptions/warning on those cheep Chinese toys.
- trisomy21, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2Three choices for the raping? It's a nice.
- smackhero, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2you misspelled "cheap"--ironic isn't it?
- MOJIRA, on 05/17/2008, -0/+1That was more or less a typo. I do know how to spell cheap, but yeah, ironic I guess.
- acosta814, on 10/12/2007, -33/+1I guess people are willing to try anything to get into the porn industry
- rtay150, on 10/12/2007, -1/+29Thats actually a way to never get into the porn industry.
- jhuebel, on 10/12/2007, -1/+16I think between you and cbme (previous post above), we've reach our quota on stupid comments for this story. Thanks for that.
- NoNom, on 10/12/2007, -4/+4John Bobbitt was in a porno b/c of his once severed penis. Bobbitt's just wasn't self-inflicted and his dick was reattached.
- acosta814, on 10/12/2007, -5/+5Above, It was in reference to John Bobbit who got his ***** cut off by his wife then went into porn.................nevertheless digg me up or digg me down just DIGG ...............you bastards.
- roadkillkid, on 10/12/2007, -4/+1@rtay150
Actually, John Bobbit made porn films after his wife Lorena cut his dick off with a kitchen knife while he was sleeping.
From the wikipedia article:
"After his reattachment surgery, Bobbitt briefly became a porn star, in part to finance the operation to reattach his penis. He appeared in three movies: John Wayne Bobbitt … Uncut, Buttman at Nudes a Poppin' 2, and Frankenpenis. In Frankenpenis, Bobbitt played a character who was made with spare parts (like the monster in Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley's Frankenstein) and whose penis inexplicably comes off during a rousing session of intercourse. Bobbitt then moans, "Oh no, not again."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lorena_and_john_bobbit
- KineticShampoo, on 10/12/2007, -62/+2What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Oh, baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love
Yeah
Oh, I don't know why you're not there
I give you my love, but you don't care
So what is right and what is wrong
Gimme a sign
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh
Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh
Oh, I don't know, what can I do
What else can I say, it's up to you
I know we're one, just me and you
I can't go on
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh
Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh
What is love, oooh, oooh, oooh
What is love, oooh, oooh, oooh
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
I want no other, no other lover
This is your life, our time
When we are together, I need you forever
Is it love
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more (oooh, oooh)
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more (oooh, oooh)
What is love? - sysoprock, on 10/12/2007, -5/+42The man was rumored to haven been listening to King Missile shortly before the incident...
- coldfusion055, on 10/12/2007, -2/+22Oh man, I forgot about the Detachable Penis song...
- Khabi, on 10/12/2007, -2/+19I specifically had to do a search in the comments just to see if anyone mentioned that song. My hat is off to you! :)
- Newportbeachguy, on 10/12/2007, -14/+5Makes ya think twice before adding sausage doesn't it?
- Jholder112233, on 10/12/2007, -16/+2lmao. He'll really regret that when he meets a girl and she wants sex... she'll have a bit of a shock.
- po43292, on 10/12/2007, -4/+1He doesn't exactly seem like the dating type. You already know what he does at dinner in a restaurant.
- tazx, on 10/12/2007, -4/+35Darwin award candidate.
- starfisch, on 10/12/2007, -6/+140buried as inaccurate; i'm sure some customers were merely pizza likers
- Jholder112233, on 10/12/2007, -9/+3Pmsl. You really made me laugh :D
- crashflow, on 10/12/2007, -6/+1some were just there for the money.
- seandfeeney, on 10/12/2007, -12/+2 OMFG WWWWHHHHHHYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!............
- TomTruelle, on 10/12/2007, -12/+2hahaha, he cut his penis off in a restaurant named zizzi
- bsolidgold, on 10/12/2007, -13/+3...only in London.
- fre4, on 10/12/2007, -9/+2you gotta be kidding.. ow.
- mikefitz2, on 10/12/2007, -10/+2nope dont believe it want a video or something
- davesbrain, on 10/12/2007, -9/+60If those crazy Brits would just ban knives this senseless violence would come to a joyous end. Please, people across the pond, think about the penises that could be saved if you only banned knives.
- Beaver6813, on 10/12/2007, -11/+16Agreed. I blame video games personally.
- ElwoodHerring, on 10/12/2007, -13/+4This isn't violence, it's self-mutilation. He didn't hurt anyone else. This guy might be totally loony but at least he's not a murderer.
- 1jaxstate1, on 10/12/2007, -10/+1That's a shame.
- UrbanVoyeur, on 10/12/2007, -10/+3That is one way to make a sausage pizza...
- giid, on 10/12/2007, -13/+5Pics or it didn't happen.
- vanbacon, on 10/12/2007, -10/+0Well we can all say has no balls right about now.
- grachi, on 10/12/2007, -5/+12i wonder why he did it at a restaurant and not in his house or something.
- Beaver6813, on 10/12/2007, -4/+38Attention.
- Daniel001, on 10/12/2007, -3/+45yeah, you'd think people would use some common sense when they're cutting their own penis off.
- crashflow, on 10/12/2007, -3/+9that new york times graphic on gun death starts making more sense now. See, even without guns, 30+ yr old white men like offing themselves.
- daishin, on 10/12/2007, -4/+9Maybe offing himself is how he gets off? Theres a joke in there somewhere.
- yoadrian, on 10/12/2007, -23/+5ok this is pathetic, what has happened to digg. i used to come here and hear hilarius comments about the most boring subjects. You guys could turn anything into a joke. Now your provided with a very funny story with lots of potential, and nobody can come up with anything. I know i am not saying anything funny either, but thats because i am trying to be serious right now, and any joke that follows this will obviously not be funny. but seriously, i have heard the same sausage joke 10 times. read before you try to add a joke. feed off each other's jokes and comments. a one man show will get nowhere. people used to comment about each other and do way more follow ups. And stop digging each other down to make your comment stand out.
and i just gotta say though, even thou this guy doesn't have a penis, he definatley got balls.- Beaver6813, on 10/12/2007, -2/+15Maybe we're all depressed because your comments are making us so o-0
- Futurejunior, on 10/12/2007, -6/+2Cut the rant, leave the joke
- griz, on 10/12/2007, -4/+88Was this part of the "Cut off your Wee for a Wii" contest?
- surf314, on 10/12/2007, -13/+16Picture or it didn't happen.....wait no
- airquotes, on 10/12/2007, -26/+3I dont thing they would be able to find my penis if it was cut off when flaccid, im a grower not a shower.
They would think it was a mushroom- futureb, on 10/12/2007, -2/+30did you just tell everyone on digg that you have a small penis?
- Octave, on 10/12/2007, -3/+15Hi, you must be new here.
- BenKenobi88, on 10/12/2007, -6/+4Funniest thing I've read all day!
You just keep up that motion of the ocean and you'll do alright, kid.
- imamessy1, on 10/12/2007, -2/+28I like The Sun headline much better: Docs fight to save man's willy.
http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2007180857,00.html - BeardedTacoFish, on 10/12/2007, -10/+1I'd like some extra pepperoni on my pizza please...
- CheapDigWannbe, on 10/12/2007, -2/+19Imagine how many people came back home to tell the crazy scene they saw in the restaurant, but no one believed them.
- hazard, on 10/12/2007, -7/+5Meatlover's special?
- aresef, on 10/12/2007, -3/+10The way my Google homepage is set up, the Word of the Day is right next to the Digg feed. Imagine what was going through my mind as my eye quickly skimmed the homepage as I saw "man cuts off penis" and half of the word "circumspect."
In other news, the restaurant is pleased to announce a new topping... - burstaneurysm, on 10/12/2007, -3/+17Check please!
- dcbebop, on 10/12/2007, -6/+4Motive?
- maxime007, on 10/12/2007, -8/+4It happened in a restaurant called Zizzi. In French, Zizi means penis. What a coincidence. He tried to cut his Zizi at the Zizzi
- funkmachine, on 10/12/2007, -14/+4 - Waiter! There is a penis in my soup!
- Well don't shout it too loud, or everyone will want one.- joeydoo, on 10/12/2007, -2/+8...........I don't get it.
What are you trying to say? - FatalTragedy316, on 10/12/2007, -3/+6No matter how hard you try to be funny, I will never want a penis in my soup.
- joeydoo, on 10/12/2007, -2/+8...........I don't get it.
- adrianvega, on 10/12/2007, -6/+0i heard this was another prank for the upcoming Borat sequel...
- adrianvega, on 10/12/2007, -4/+3those europeans sure love their blood sausage
- waterboy1628, on 10/12/2007, -10/+2Who ordered the pepperoni?
- abyssknight, on 10/12/2007, -8/+2I believe the phrase to describe this is "An Hero".
- Cornedbeef, on 10/12/2007, -8/+3The man just wanted to leave the waiter a very large tip.
- mikeyeah, on 10/12/2007, -11/+2This is how it went...
Wife: Darn! They forgot to put sausage on our pizza.
Husband: Well, I could ask them to add sausage or...I could cut my penis off with my swiss army knife and..BAM!!!...problem solved.
Wife: I'm so lucky! - vsaint, on 10/12/2007, -9/+16Kind of a dick move.
- rtay150, on 10/12/2007, -7/+1How do explain that to your girlfriend? Uhh....I used my dick as pizza toppings.
- lagrange, on 10/12/2007, -8/+3A new study from Duke University shows that obese people are 72% more likely to chop off their own junk in a pizza restaurant.
***** moral degenerates. - TexanPsycho, on 10/12/2007, -7/+1Pics or it didn't happen. Oh wait...
- 5xSTUN, on 10/12/2007, -6/+1Wow, what a dork.
- Afreyt, on 10/12/2007, -6/+2Penn, Teller and The Amazing Johnathan wondering how they can top this.
- dr0evil, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1I've known Johnathan for over 25 years - do not doubt that he could top this. It would, however, be YOUR dick!
- newsheatdotcom, on 10/12/2007, -7/+6Do I spot a sequel to "Free Willy"?
- PopcornDave, on 10/12/2007, -7/+3Small sausage to go is up. Small sausage to go...
-
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