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126 Comments
- SoundJudgment, on 02/04/2009, -7/+193"Hello, Emergency Operator!? I accidently just shot my best friend! What do I do??"
"Sir, calm down. You need to go over and make sure if he is really dead?"
"Oh, okay.... hold on a second..." *** BAM!! ***
"Yes, alright... I did as you asked. What next!??" - infamousjr, on 02/04/2009, -3/+139Dam this wasn't an Onion article. I have no hope for humanity.
- BigMiller, on 02/04/2009, -2/+108reminds me of this:
(9 October 2008, South Africa) For several days Johannesburg office workers watched a demolition worker slowly chip away at a pillar supporting the concrete slab above him. One observer said, "I wondered how they would drop that section." The walls were gone, and only the supporting pillars remained.
Dozens of observers watched the slow and senseless demolition proceed. Finally the only possible outcome concluded this epic battle. The besieged support collapsed, crushing man and machine beneath a pile of rubble. Ishmael Makone, 52, was killed instantly inside the cab of his mini-excavator.
"I cannot believe they did not foresee this," said a shocked witness who did not forsee this. Observers said they had been concerned about the workers' safety for several days. "There was no common sense."
from:
http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2008-24.h ... - anklesnap, on 02/04/2009, -4/+92LOL, add this to the worlds dumbest criminals list...
- darkecho, on 02/04/2009, -0/+47This one can go right under the lady who flagged down the cops to say she got stiffed trying to buy drugs. So the cops go the the dealers house and the dealer says she doesn't sell drugs, and that she (the dealer) is just a prostitute.
This is one of the reasons why I watch COPS. - nikpappagiorgio, on 02/04/2009, -3/+45Yeah, this ***** is selling me oregano.... this ***** must be against the law. Oh, is this more of a 311 call?
- chadsexingtime, on 02/04/2009, -2/+28Sir? Sir! Stay on the line, sir, I need to ask you a question.
Ok, are you an idiot? - Protuhj, on 02/04/2009, -12/+36These comments suck.
- lonewolfe, on 02/04/2009, -1/+22He didn't die.
- draegs, on 02/04/2009, -2/+21I'm so proud to be from Cleveland right now.
- Jeffler, on 02/04/2009, -0/+18Darwin Award needs you to die.
- Alheithinn, on 02/04/2009, -11/+28Man, that's FUNNY!
- unusualbob, on 02/04/2009, -0/+16Reminds me of the time on Cops when a girl flagged down a cop because she thought she bought fake crack and the dealer she bought it from wouldn't give her a refund.
Can anyone find a clip of this somewhere? - Tarkaan, on 02/04/2009, -1/+16What's sick is that this guy will probably go down for a year or more for a nickel bag of white powder hiding in his crotch. For god's sake, when will the madness end?
- WhiZa, on 02/04/2009, -0/+14CLEVELAND ROCKS! Literally, there's cocaine everywhere...
- dustinl4m3, on 02/04/2009, -1/+11methylenedioxymethamphetamine != diacetylmorphine
One is a serotonergic stimulant, the other an opioid depressant/analgesic. - SpeedSteamBoat, on 02/04/2009, -1/+11Well, seeing as prohibition makes it easier to get those drugs, wouldn't it make more sense to place them behind the counter of a tightly regulated government program for addicts instead of in the hands of gang members on the streets?
Prohibition is and always will be a complete and utter failure. You'll never stop people from doing drugs. The best you can hope for is to not let those drugs found organized and violent crime, and make the facilities available for people to quit when they want to. - welestgw, on 02/04/2009, -1/+10The roads weren't blocked by water?
- Import98, on 02/05/2009, -0/+9'"I cannot believe they did not foresee this," said a shocked witness who did not forsee this.'
Classic - vbullinger, on 02/04/2009, -1/+9Nobody should be doing weed, smoking or drinking alcohol, either.
No one should eat bacon or cookies, either.
Where do you draw the line?
Here's your line: you can do whatever you want, so long as you don't infringe upon my rights. I can do whatever I want, so long as it doesn't infringe upon your rights.
If you get to decide what's right (weed) and what's wrong (heroin), who's to stop someone else from doing it? Who's to stop someone from disallowing you to put X or Y into your body, if it's ok for the government to say what we can and can't do?
It's a victimless crime, right? If it doesn't have a victim... then it isn't a crime! How can you commit a crime against yourself?
I've never done any illegal narcotic ever, and never will, because it's just a dumb thing to do. But I think you should have all authority over your own body. All of it. - InsaneMachine, on 02/04/2009, -0/+8I remember that, it ended up being actual crack.
- CJDarkhaven, on 02/04/2009, -0/+7@M063
...and exactly what were you trying to accomplish by taking a situation involving a dumb druggie named Alejandro Melendez, and twisting it into a completely inane commentary on the actions of blacks during two entirely unrelated American events? If it was wit, you failed magnificently. If it was to illustrate how much of a not-so-covert racist foreign prick you are, congrats *****! - HabsChick, on 02/04/2009, -3/+10not the sharpest tool in the shed lol
- xxpor, on 02/04/2009, -1/+8No, but it does represent Cleveland.
- ksw870, on 02/04/2009, -0/+6I saw that episode also...CLASSIC!
- Robotsscareme, on 02/04/2009, -0/+6"Melendez called 911 late Saturday and reported that two men with guns were watching him."
The dudes profession is clearly getting to him.. maybe subconsciously turning himself in .. was his last resort..
or he's a dumbass.. you know whatever.. - s0nicfreak, on 02/04/2009, -0/+6@Jeffler
No, it just needs you to be taken out of the gene pool - contact, on 02/04/2009, -0/+5Am I the only one a little confused that they were selling him heroin but the police found cocaine on him?
Whatever does the trick I guess. - jason210, on 02/04/2009, -0/+5never forget?
- Jade10145, on 02/04/2009, -1/+6-To Protect and Serve-
Police said the 42-year-old man dialed 911 twice last week so he could have his sub made correctly. The second call was to complain that officers weren't arriving fast enough.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/08/06/man-calls ... - twistaspliff, on 02/04/2009, -0/+5...that it was an inside job.
- BigMiller, on 02/04/2009, -1/+6it's not like a cashier or a gardener overheard it, it was a police dispatcher.
- inactive, on 02/04/2009, -2/+6"Hi huh... I have an emergency, I think someone's in my house..!"
"OK we can dispach police. Can you state your address sir?"
"O... hold on a second...*click*....yeah, 2 ounces of that. Give me some of that purple diesel stuff too. How much is it? *click* Sorry about that, thanks for holding... yeah I think I heard a noise downstairs. My address is Ave.[...]" - latrosicarius, on 02/04/2009, -0/+4Darwin awards can only be given to somebody who, after an act of stupidity, is left with the inability to reproduce (e.g. the person died or now has issues with his or her genitalia).
- bpoteat, on 02/04/2009, -3/+7Yeah, this one guy in Cleveland is a moron. That MUST mean the entire civilized world is crumbling.
- PillCosby, on 02/04/2009, -0/+4E is usually considered a far stronger, more refined version of heroin.
/s - SpookyBoots, on 02/04/2009, -0/+4I have no hope in Dams.
- twistaspliff, on 02/04/2009, -1/+5"thinks"? Grammar Nazi fail.
- ncsifsf08, on 02/04/2009, -2/+6fvcktheNWO are you the guy in the story?
- SpookyBoots, on 02/04/2009, -0/+4And how!
- pikpikcarrotmon, on 02/05/2009, -0/+3Watch out. Diggers are sensitive around the F-word.
- IPrintAll, on 02/04/2009, -2/+5You don't have to take either to know what the difference is. . . lol.
And you sound like a cop. Ever thought of a career change? - renegadeafk, on 02/05/2009, -0/+3A lot of slang has slightly different meanings in different locals.
- CJDarkhaven, on 02/04/2009, -0/+2Considering one took place in '04, and the other this year, no. Considering one involved a massive storm that involved everyone in a specific area, and the other was the Inauguration where people came from all over the damn place...no. Wait, wait...blacks were involved in BOTH of them! I got it, right?! Wait, that's one dot, nothing else connects them. Unless you're saying that blacks are strictly urban people. And if you're comparing all blacks to the druggie in the story above because he was in an urban area (as it seems you're indicating) then I believe my initial assessment of you being a total racist prick ***** are dead on. Pretty sure I connected the dots on that one fairly well.
...all this to indicate you're a dumb *****, don't you feel all warm and special 'Sparky'? - MazdaEric, on 02/04/2009, -0/+3North East Ohio - home to some of the smartest people on Earth :)
- methylamine, on 02/04/2009, -1/+4and you can tie your shoes in the morning? amazing.
- Syric, on 02/05/2009, -0/+3I guess when you watch construction workers, you assume they know what they're doing.
You assume wrong sometimes. - stsvatos, on 02/04/2009, -0/+3Wow M, like your generalization, grouping ALL Americans together like that, such foresight! I guess being a bigot is socially acceptable?
- lisaawesome, on 02/04/2009, -0/+3That reminds me of grading an entire essay where "thinks" was used instead of "things." I honestly think the kid thought that was the right word.
- RainStreet, on 02/04/2009, -0/+3We also had the first murder of 2009. There's always next year, Detroit.
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