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- PopeSmoker, on 09/23/2009, -1/+611On The Perfect Crime:
"I break in to Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard: I have a son, and it's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier." - mav3rick92, on 09/23/2009, -1/+407"I wish I could menstruate. If I could menstruate, I wouldn’t have to deal with idiotic calendars anymore. I’d just be able to count down from my previous cycle. Plus I’d be more in tune with the moon and the tides."
-Dwight Schrute - johnnyagentzero, on 09/23/2009, -1/+316Security in this office park is a joke. Last year I came to work with my spud-gun in a duffle bag. I sat at my desk all day with a rifle that shoots potatoes at 60 pounds per square inch. Can you imagine if I was deranged?
- howdareyou, on 09/23/2009, -1/+300Whoever wrote that better have won an emmy.
- WordsnCollision, on 09/23/2009, -2/+199Bears, beets, Battlestar Gallactica... shake well and repeat.
- mousky, on 09/23/2009, -2/+179Don't you mean "It's like comparing football to football"?
- tradeplumbing, on 09/23/2009, -6/+157People saying US Office is better than UK Office or vice versa just don't get it.
US Office is aimed at the US's sense of humor, UK Office is aimed at the UK's sense of humor.
It's like comparing soccer to gridiron. - tj111, on 09/23/2009, -2/+118WHOOOOOOOOSH
- jack104, on 09/23/2009, -1/+104"It's time to put our balls in the guillotine as they say"
"Dwight, who has ever said that?" - DLun203, on 09/23/2009, -3/+89I love the office. I come for the Jim/Dwight pranks, I stay for the Jim/Pam romance. Darryl could be the most under appreciated character on that show.
[About Kelly] "It's like she only wants to hook up when Ryan comes around. It's getting to the point where I get excited every time I see that little dude walk through the door." - ssquared22, on 09/22/2009, -3/+88Rainn Wilson makes me smile.
- faithhammer, on 09/23/2009, -1/+81I know I'm not the only one who read this in his voice and pauses.
- Houdan, on 09/23/2009, -1/+80On Apologies:
"I don't believe in apologies. When someone in the Yakuza makes a mistake they cut off a portion of their own pinky finger, and in that way save face. And, knowing the Japanese they probably get an even better prosthetic finger with a knife you can take out of it or screwdriver or a corkscrew." - shnuffy, on 09/23/2009, -0/+65Don't let the girls stay in there too long, they'll all end up on the same cycle.
- goobly, on 09/23/2009, -3/+47I think checking the position of the sun is a more accurate clock than blood spurting out a vagina.
- jrackow, on 09/23/2009, -3/+44What's gridiron?
- woofer1125, on 09/23/2009, -0/+41Gridi Ron
This is a game where giant men roll over each other for a leather egg. Usually the goal is to get the leather egg and put it in the end zone.
Takes me back, when the gentlemen of the country club used to say "Ahh 7 points for every egg laid" - Shawn4168, on 09/23/2009, -0/+37The whole Pam/Jim thing kept things interesting for a few seasons, but it's getting old now. They can get married and have their baby and live happily ever after and all that, but the show needs to focus on something else to keep us hooked. The last 4 seasons have ended on a cliffhanger concerning their relationship, I'd like to see something different this year.
- willdelaney, on 09/23/2009, -1/+29ITS ALMOST LIKE THE US OFFICE IS KINDA BASED ON THE UK OFFICE
whoda thought? - danosaurus, on 09/23/2009, -2/+28Which bear is best?
FALSE BLACK BEARS
That's debatable... - darkstar107, on 09/23/2009, -1/+26Fact: An improperly dug outhouse is more dangerous than a loaded shotgun!
- wontstoptalking, on 09/23/2009, -1/+25Oh, just missed the edit button:
Dwight Shrute on becoming a good salesmen:
"And as you have planted this beet seed into the ground, I shall plant my seed in you."
Ryan: "I don't think you know what you're saying." - itlnstln, on 09/23/2009, -0/+23Parkour!
- inkubusfan, on 09/23/2009, -1/+24thats not giving enough credit to the rest of the cast who are brilliant in their own right. I, for one, am burying you.
- kthoma22, on 09/23/2009, -2/+25American teeth are better.
- kevyn, on 09/23/2009, -2/+23A game that involves grids.... and er... people named Ron?
- btchsntsht, on 09/23/2009, -9/+30***** YOU
- ryansmith18, on 09/23/2009, -1/+21American football.
- 9lbTaco, on 09/23/2009, -0/+20Yeah, Darryl caught me off guard with the Gang fight thing;
"pretty soon you're laughing and hugging. Before you know it, you've forgotten the whole thing. Ya'll can just go to church together... get an ice cream cone." - tommymcgimsey, on 09/23/2009, -0/+19are you content?
- ascensionrites, on 09/23/2009, -0/+15MICHAEL!
- twiztidsinz, on 09/23/2009, -1/+15It's 9 better than 30 Rock.
- oofgeg, on 09/23/2009, -1/+15Wallace: Did you shout "fire," causing a panic?
Dwight: Yes, I shouted fire. I shouted many things. I also shouted instructions on how to get out of the building so you can imagine my frustration, as safety officer, when nobody would heed of, would heeded, heeded of--
Michael: Headed of-
Dwight: When no one would take headed of my instructions. - weeFred, on 09/23/2009, -3/+17I don't know.......... I swore the original office was far better than the American Office for the first 2 seasons, but since then I actually think I like the American Office better.
- gv402, on 09/23/2009, -0/+14The hell show is "39 Rock"?
- Brassbud, on 09/23/2009, -2/+16I actually thought that was a very interesting observation. As a man, I have no way of keeping time without external aid. I wonder if in ancient times fertile women were used as clocks.
- inactive, on 09/23/2009, -11/+24"Dwight Schrute is one of the most unique characters on television"
Except... he's directly based on another character:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gareth_Keenan - SurrealDream, on 09/23/2009, -1/+14Succinctly put goobly.
- goobly, on 09/24/2009, -0/+13"I'm sorry Wendy, but I just don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die." - Mr/Mrs Garrison
- ChromaVita, on 09/23/2009, -1/+12MICHAEL!
- trav3135, on 09/23/2009, -0/+11its more like comparing something i personally like/dislike to something i personally like/dislike.
- gadgetlust, on 09/23/2009, -4/+14That's Jim, not Dwight -- still a priceless line.
- ascensionrites, on 09/23/2009, -1/+11Between "39 Rock" and having to explain why the quote is funny, it's amazing someone has dugg you up.
- shnuffy, on 09/23/2009, -2/+12Dwight Shrute makes me smile.
- DaneGleesac, on 09/23/2009, -0/+9Gadgetlust is right and it is:
Fact: Bears eat beets. Bears. Beets. Battlestar Gallactica - ju66l3r, on 09/23/2009, -2/+11Professor Farnsworth says, "Good news, everyone! I've invented a writing style that makes you read this in my voice!"
- Qumahlin, on 09/23/2009, -7/+16While I like the UK version of the office, Garreth is nothing like Dwight. In fact that is one of the largest let downs from when I started watching the UK version.
However Ricky Gervais is a better Michael Scott than Steve Carrell could ever hope to be. - MikeyMoose, on 09/23/2009, -0/+9"You, Sir, are as nostalgic as you are poor and Irish."
- gv402, on 09/23/2009, -0/+8Or maybe just a block north and to the left?
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