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BEHOLD! Fox News Creates Legal Controversy Out of Thin Air watch!

cracked.com — Could it be their least impressive illusion yet?! They report, you decide.

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  • dunnylovehun, on 06/23/2008, -31/+163That slogan just gets more and more hilarious every day. They should play a rim shot every time the TV voice guy reads it: "We report (ba dum CHHHHH) you decide. (Uproarious laugh track)"
    • alpha19, on 06/23/2008, -4/+21However, if you think about it for a minute, you could take it as "We report [what ever kind of garbage we want], You decide [to ignore it because it is garbage]". It actually kinda makes sense.
    • cawpin, on 06/23/2008, -22/+8They didn't make anything up. The guy is fighting the lottery and they reported it. Buried.
      • bob12321, on 06/23/2008, -1/+10Hes not fighting anything. He simply got corrected because he did not scratch off the stuff over the 1 in 17.
      • hipnerd, on 06/23/2008, -1/+14What they invented is the legal controversy. The Lottery has rules in place that their maximum liability in the case of a misprint in the price of a new lottery ticket. These rules have been tested and upheld multiple times. So Fox spent 1/2 hour arguing both sides of the issue, then revealed there was no controversy, the guy is screwed. It was a giant waste of time -- but that is true of pretty much everything on Fox News...
    • tallassrob, on 06/23/2008, -21/+19Buried for being unfunny and lame. I hate Fox news, but this was just dumb.
    • andweirdontop, on 06/23/2008, -9/+17Buried for the total lameass commentating.
      • truspect0r, on 06/23/2008, -2/+6Buried because your avatar is a $cientologist.
    • footfwd, on 06/23/2008, -0/+5That or they should do shots on air every time it's read.
    • Infidelcastr0, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1That is officially the best idea I've heard all week.
    • ThankTheCheese, on 06/24/2008, -0/+5you can do it at home, too:

      http://www.instantrimshot.com/
    • Hangly, on 06/24/2008, -1/+7*terrorist fist jab*
  • Surferess, on 06/23/2008, -38/+21As usual, Fox news looking to fill up 24 hours of news every day of the year. The cracked guy gets it right on the money. When they put 3 women up there in a row, what do you expect? You certainly shouldn't expect the latest news on economics.
    • wgladstone, on 06/23/2008, -5/+41Thanks, but in fairness, I don't see the men of FoxNews winning any mensa awards -- although they seem able to draw a 7 on a piece of paper.
      • Jellybean3473, on 06/23/2008, -1/+14Barely.
      • Scrappy1850, on 06/23/2008, -3/+6shep is cool
      • Surferess, on 06/23/2008, -1/+8You have an excellent point, Gladstone. Gotta admit, though, those Fox news people are sure pretty people.
    • Rfriaz, on 06/23/2008, -7/+4Way to put down your gender.
  • mwaleed86, on 06/23/2008, -29/+25Fox News is ***** up!
    • dayal911, on 06/23/2008, -22/+5I see nothing wrong with what Fox News did here.

      Stop making something out of nothing.
  • leerayIG88, on 06/23/2008, -16/+249she looks hot, i'd do her with my wizard hat.
    • BoneheadFarker, on 06/23/2008, -9/+82Really? I'd do her with my dick, but that's just me...
      • Godlike, on 06/23/2008, -8/+6In the mouth to shut her up. Then I'd make her bake me a pie, give that bitch a real taste of conservatism in America.
      • Vodd9, on 06/23/2008, -1/+5AT FULL FORCE
      • MRCAB, on 06/23/2008, -2/+2maybe "wizard hat" is a euphemism for dick......? perhaps he's circumcised?
        • TheAkolyte, on 06/24/2008, -0/+4Perhaps you dont know the internet
    • serif69, on 06/23/2008, -2/+21Her knees are too sharp.
      • opmike, on 06/24/2008, -0/+5Think of them like tent spikes for when you're hitting it doggystyle.
    • jpezzznuts, on 06/23/2008, -2/+43oh Bloodninja you still crack me up
    • ShorD143, on 06/23/2008, -1/+16i put on my robe and wizard hat...bwahaha
    • iPsyko, on 06/24/2008, -4/+2I'd hat her with my wizard's do!
    • otto989, on 06/24/2008, -0/+2i'd cast lvl 8 ***** of the infinite on myself first
    • drakethegreat, on 06/24/2008, -0/+3Your dick is worth +20 more experience points then a Wizard Hat.
  • Unriggable, on 06/23/2008, -13/+7Typical.
  • FrapFreak, on 06/23/2008, -23/+5Strange... Even the little thumbnail seems to say "OPINION". Wait... a BIASED opinion??? NO WAI!!!
  • jzuska, on 06/23/2008, -28/+5A blonde news babe is dumb. STORY AT 11!!!!!!!!!!!!! DIGG FRONT PAGE!!!!!!!!!!
  • FrapFreak, on 06/23/2008, -23/+2Strange... Even the little thumbnail seems to say "OPINION". Wait... a BIASED opinion??? NO WAI!!!
  • phorty40, on 06/23/2008, -17/+6faux news? creating news? No! perish the thought.
  • BuddingMonkey, on 06/23/2008, -42/+35WE'LL DO IT LIVE!
    • destron, on 06/23/2008, -7/+24***** IT!
    • jzuska, on 06/23/2008, -6/+6Falafel?
    • sruffelman, on 06/23/2008, -0/+7I was waiting for someone to reference Bill-O.
      • atmancloud, on 06/23/2008, -6/+3Bill-O is a DICK HEAD! I don't like that guy, he can never prove a point. Always talking over guest, he is a poor-man of a excuse.
    • gobbstopp, on 06/23/2008, -12/+8I was waiting for someone to piss me off by referencing Bill-O.
    • dpcamp, on 06/23/2008, -1/+11I was waiting for someone to piss me off
      • asskicker32, on 06/23/2008, -3/+4I was waiting for someone to piss me on
      • ShorD143, on 06/23/2008, -3/+5I was waiting for someone to piss on me
    • RATM4EVER, on 06/23/2008, -2/+5I was waiting to piss off on someone
    • RecoDesign, on 06/23/2008, -1/+3better to be pissed off than pissed upon
    • khsheehan, on 06/23/2008, -3/+1I'm pissed.
    • xceptionaly, on 06/23/2008, -4/+2I was waiting for someone to pass me out by referencing Bill-O
    • Andrwmorph, on 06/23/2008, -5/+4YOU ARE NEW AND ORIGINAL!
    • zombies187, on 06/23/2008, -4/+2BRB gotta piss.
    • Funpolice2050, on 06/23/2008, -3/+2Someone pissed in my cereal today!
    • vukeidorian, on 06/23/2008, -3/+2***** THING SUCKS!!
    • junkwheel, on 06/23/2008, -1/+1.
    • Brad324, on 06/24/2008, -0/+2TO PLAY US OUT? I DONT KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
  • ericnorris1, on 06/23/2008, -9/+547Was I the only one who noticed that this wasnt funny at all??

    As funny as the actual news show is, the commentary is lacking in the comedy department.
    • dupems, on 06/23/2008, -5/+105Don't bother pointing out the truth, since this is anti-fox news it'll be dugg up regardless of the fact that it's terrible.
    • SasquatchBill, on 06/23/2008, -3/+45I didn't bother to watch it.

      Buried for Hate by Numbers.
    • PhairOh, on 06/23/2008, -2/+42Not only that, ericnorris1, but did you notice the irony involved with the creation of this video?

      While yes, perhaps Fox News was making more of this than was necessary, it's not very likely that this was their top story. It was just one of the hundreds of stories in which they get legal analysts involved, whether it be lotto tickets or murder.

      However, I feel like the creator really went digging for this one. I mean, there are plenty of ridiculous segments on Fox News, and this is one of the tamest I've seen, yet the creator of the video is making it out to be the quintessential example of Fox News' ridiculousness. Sure looks like he's trying to create some controversy of out thin air, doesn't it?
    • slaizer, on 06/23/2008, -4/+54That video had "I want to be Jon Stewart" written all over it so loud they could've just put it as a watermark instead. Would've been less visible.

      Here's some real news, kid: You're not Jon Stewart.
      • IJstickI, on 06/24/2008, -5/+2and jon stewart isnt colbert
        • rowjimmy, on 06/24/2008, -1/+1in today's america, being a writer for the daily show (or the onion, for that matter) must be a cake-walk. they can literally take just about any headline, and script in "jon stewart reads headline and looks quizzically at the prompter while raising eyebrows". when reality itself is satirical, one way or another, this darkness has got to give.
    • tjrecord, on 06/23/2008, -1/+22The commentator made this a really frustrating and boring video? His commentary got on my nerves so much that I couldn't watch the end of this video :P
    • Sunuva, on 06/23/2008, -1/+20Not funny at all. Agreed. That guy moderating was horribly irritating, and with the stack of javascript errors this was a complete waste of time.
    • tikiman453, on 06/23/2008, -1/+40i hate that guy.
      he made me feel awkward just watching him.
    • wicketr, on 06/23/2008, -2/+19The funniest part is he's trying to tell Rupert Murdoch how to run a News Channel when it has the highest cable news ratings of them all, despite how much people hate them.

      Maybe he needs to gear his videos to CNN or MSNBC. Or hell, take his own advice and have a decent point. Did he seriously reduce himself to mocking their hand gestures? What's next? The clothes? Or their hair?
      • bjornski, on 06/23/2008, -4/+4McDonalds sells more burgers than anyone else, but that doesn't make them good.

        The National Enquirer is one of the most read publications in the nation, it doesn't make it factual.

        Same goes for Fox.
        • wicketr, on 06/23/2008, -0/+5You're missing my point. Rupert Murdoch doesn't care about "good" or "factual". He only cares about "number of viewers" and "advertising dollars". With that in mind, the video is pointless.
    • lucidapathy, on 06/23/2008, -1/+23Third Hate By Numbers video I've seen.
      Third time I thought "who the ***** thinks this is funny?"
      Translation: no more Hate By Numbers videos for me.
    • ahawks, on 06/23/2008, -1/+7Is it surprising really that it was lame and not funny?

      The premise of this little series "Hate by Numbers" is to make fun of other people's screw ups basically, right? How is that any different than the people they're making fun of?

      Fox constructs a legal controversy.
      Hate by numbers constructs a "simon says" game.

      It's the same ***** thing.

      Bonus 3rd step: digg users post comments making fun of Hate by Numbers making fun of Fox.
      • RegalGSX, on 06/24/2008, -0/+0I hate you for saying this. I hate myself for replying to you. I hate others for making fun of my post. ***** all ya'll.
    • Vodd9, on 06/23/2008, -7/+1It's because he lacks the confidence the loud-mouth, the charisma, etc. of someone like John Stewart.
      It makes his arguments by no means less credible, but people tend to get more convinced by the superficial side of it.
      I mean, ffs, just pay a bit of attention the way politician speak, and this should come to no surprise to you.
    • vat0r, on 06/24/2008, -1/+1I'm all for FOX bashing but you're spot on. This video is lame.
  • alpha19, on 06/23/2008, -17/+139Buried, as... who cares. "Omg Fox News did something controversial! digg digg digg"
    • jzuska, on 06/23/2008, -13/+7Obama baby mama drama?
    • appleswitch, on 06/23/2008, -8/+6"Buried, as... who cares"

      This is where America gets it's news, this is how they decide who to vote for. Sound important now?
      • mattbrad2, on 06/23/2008, -3/+5Wow. You speak as though we're all a bunch of sheep. How about just speaking for yourself buddy.
      • RSD31, on 06/24/2008, -0/+0I guess he gets his news from FN, so he needs them to be accurate.
    • SpeedyG, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1I buried it because I can't tell which website to allow Javascript for so I can see the video.
    • scottkrotdotcom, on 06/24/2008, -0/+2buried.... because who the ***** has time to listen to fox news let alone make a god damn video about how they ***** up it wasnt even news
    • takua108, on 06/24/2008, -0/+2Thank God someone else has a brain on this website.
  • kd420, on 06/23/2008, -10/+5Mmmm, you can practically taste the substance of news these days diluting away
  • imacbook, on 06/23/2008, -24/+6I really do like Fox News. Unlike BBC News, they are not totally obsessed with things that don't matter like Zimbabwe and CCTV cameras.
    • NotOptium, on 06/23/2008, -0/+9Yeah who gives a ***** about Mugabe rigging an election through brute force or people's privacy being lost. All that crap's happening an entire ocean away. Nobody in America cares about any of that crap, so why should the BBC?

      Wait, they do?

      ...Wait, they're where?

      Ah, *****.
    • TheLoneHoot, on 06/23/2008, -1/+1Troll much?

      Oh, apparently so!
    • vNES, on 06/23/2008, -1/+1Your apparent (and poor) attempt at sarcasm will not work here.
  • LordHector, on 06/23/2008, -20/+170Buried... stupidest thing I've seen on Digg. Boo....
  • davidg11, on 06/23/2008, -13/+3Now act like a Marionette!
  • Bologner, on 06/23/2008, -10/+187Yep, as much as I hate faux news, that wasn't funny.
    • H1tchh1k3r, on 06/23/2008, -10/+1I see what you did there.
      • nonstop87, on 06/23/2008, -0/+7....he posted?
        • Vesuvias, on 06/23/2008, -5/+0I honestly don't think people understand there is a site called fauxnews.com... I was once one who did not and thought I was making a witty comment... but sadly I was wrong...
      • H1tchh1k3r, on 06/23/2008, -2/+1In french, faux means false, so he's calling it false news.
      • SickofSects, on 06/24/2008, -0/+2Yes, H1tchh1k3r, but that's like if someone today calls Microsoft M$, and you respond with "I see what you did there". Calling Fox news "faux" news has been around for a while now (It's very apt of course).
      • veracon, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1Speaking of which,
        http://www.fauxnewschannel.com/
  • brainpile3000, on 06/23/2008, -14/+66Regardless of Faux News Shenanigans, this video was not funny whatsoever. In fact, I was more annoyed by the guy's poor attempts at humor than the blondie reporting.
    • badqat, on 06/23/2008, -4/+7Hate to tell you, but "the blondie" is an attorney...in fact, all three of those women are law school graduates.
      • legendxx, on 06/23/2008, -7/+3What does that have to do with anything? Everything about that video was dumb... the fact is contained lawyers doesn't make any difference.. hate to tell you.
        • drunkmonkey01, on 06/23/2008, -4/+6it actually makes it worse that those morons are attorneys.
    • scribby, on 06/23/2008, -1/+3I swear to God I'm going to pistol whip the next guy who says, " Shenanigans."
      • opmike, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1Shenanigans

        Punish me big boy, I'll be waiting...
    • ahawks, on 06/23/2008, -1/+2Hey Farva, what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy ***** on the walls and the mozzarella sticks?
  • NeoNcP, on 06/23/2008, -5/+40What the hell was that?
  • davidg11, on 06/23/2008, -14/+1Now do something emasculating
  • Revolutionista, on 06/23/2008, -9/+20That was so stupid I have to watch Miss South Carolina to try and level off.
  • Conwaysb0718, on 06/23/2008, -10/+22lame. middle of the day non story *****, the same as youll find on any station dedicated to 24 hours a day "news" coverage. Er, oh, im sorry, this was just another story dugg because it gave diggers another chance to bash fox news. my mistake.
    • rationalbeats, on 06/23/2008, -16/+2why did you vote for Bush?
      • tschau, on 06/23/2008, -2/+10Dude, I hate Fox news, but that video was just lame.
        • rationalbeats, on 06/23/2008, -4/+3I know, it is lame, but defending Fox News is worse.
        • Conwaysb0718, on 06/23/2008, -2/+3Its not defending fox news as much as its pointing out you could find this ***** on any cable news station in the middle of any slow news day. Its just a lazy attempt to bash on fox news for a dumb story, one im sure was on cnn or msnbc if you had the desire to look hard enough. And then when it gets here on digg, most of the people here who claim to be open minded about everything and blah blah blah are always ready to jump on the bandwagon and digg away when certain topics, people, companies etc being trashed, all the while disregarding the actual content of the submission.
      • masterm1nd, on 06/23/2008, -3/+6Why did you make stupid comment?
  • Krakerjax, on 06/23/2008, -8/+3"We'd love to show you the ticket but we'd have to pay gobs of money"
  • uncertainty, on 06/23/2008, -4/+34I hate fox news as much as any other right minded digger, but c'mon. This would been better it was just a link to the actual story and not some lame commentary. You can't blame them for slow news days...
    • byrdgang, on 06/23/2008, -1/+3Slow news days? They're like this every single day. Besides, there's no such thing as a slow news day. There is enough going on in the world to report on for another 100 years (if you don't believe me, go to your library and read up on various domestic and foreign issues we all need to pay attention to. You're not going to convince me that this lottery story is more pressing than many of the problems people all over the world face).
  • moneil, on 06/23/2008, -4/+64Of all the things on Fox News, he found THIS the best thing to make fun of? Wow. Buried.
    • Jones82, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1A fist bump? A pound? A terrorist fist jab?
  • vexingmodstwo, on 06/23/2008, -13/+13I'd tap the chicks on the left and middle. In a heartbeat.
  • Farmer77, on 06/23/2008, -4/+42Wasn't funny, the only thing that kept me watching was the blond chick.
    • byrdgang, on 06/23/2008, -0/+8...and that's FOX's way of getting you to tune in.
  • OC73, on 06/23/2008, -4/+33The guying doing the commentary on cracked is an asshat.
  • dupems, on 06/23/2008, -3/+21That was a ***** waste of time, and the guy doing the commentary is horrible and unfunny. Buried as lame.
  • pintomp3, on 06/23/2008, -8/+6when news becomes a for-profit venture, it quickly turns into infotainment.
  • CharlesDance, on 06/23/2008, -8/+15You tricked me into watching Hate by Numbers you bastard!
  • Lushhdog, on 06/23/2008, -10/+1I loled hard when they pointed to the right. Down with faux.

    http://foxattacks.com/virus
  • legendxx, on 06/23/2008, -2/+36Why is this on digg...
  • TexasShiv, on 06/23/2008, -3/+48God that ***** is annoying
    • homesickalien, on 06/26/2008, -0/+1I especially hate how he always sits towards the camera favoring the right side of his face. There's no need to show video of this dude when he's giving commentary as he's completely expressionless anyways. Loser.
  • gimmeslack12, on 06/23/2008, -4/+65Seriously who actually thinks this is funny? LAME.
  • ErikHarrison, on 06/23/2008, -3/+29yawn.
  • markus80, on 06/23/2008, -5/+23yeah, this sucked.
  • JimmyIkon, on 06/23/2008, -14/+8I watch fox news... you got a problem with that.
    • TrueJournals, on 06/23/2008, -3/+3Yes... yes I do.
    • MRCAB, on 06/23/2008, -0/+2not at all.
    • javip, on 06/24/2008, -0/+3I don't.. but it's a bit like a grown man saying "I wear diapers... you got a problem with that."
      It's just a bit embarrassing for you that's all...
  • samcarlos, on 06/23/2008, -3/+13Why do people think this is still digg worthy? It was funny the first few hundred times to degrade Fox but now its pointless. Just about everyone on digg knows Fox is ridiculous. Can't we agree to agree and forget about it?
    • DavidYeah, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1Much like how Coca-Cola has to continually promote their brand in order to keep it in the public's mind, Americans have to be reminded that fox news is a hilarious joke of a news network every few days.
  • snoox, on 06/23/2008, -4/+7someone is upset about unattainable hot blond with better broadcasting job than hisself. the Fox bit was more entertaining that this "humor"
  • DeviateSeptum, on 06/23/2008, -10/+4I didn't like this guy, Gladstone, the first time I saw him but he is growing on me.
  • Shao00, on 06/23/2008, -4/+15They really need to stop this d-bag from making any more of this horrible videos.
    • bjornski, on 06/23/2008, -3/+1Or you could just not WATCH them, and let those that DO enjoy them watch.
  • renpatel, on 06/23/2008, -5/+2That's the problem with running a biased news service that's 24/7. You have to be selective with what you say, heaven forbid you report something bad about the right or something good about the left... so instead you fill up time with nonsense. Everyone's happy in the end.
    • ender7074, on 06/23/2008, -0/+0Funny. I dont see you mentioning CNN, MSNBC, Cspan, or any of the other so called news outlets. They are every bit as bias but I guess its ok when its bias toward liberalism right?
  • munen123, on 06/23/2008, -8/+2faux news - fair and balanced bullcrap!

    Im not sure why anyone would get their news from such retarded news outfit.

    On the other hand want to know what moron Bush and cronnies are doing today? tune in to Republican fox news they will fill your head with pretty blondes and the right wing propaganda!!!
  • jabberwolf, on 06/23/2008, -12/+15WTF is wrong with the CRACKED guy?

    So wait, they report a story and he's more stereotypical than anyone, and this is Fox's issue how?
    Fox is actually pretty dammed straight, with the exception of anything Hannity, but WTF is this crap?
    • phydeaux70, on 06/23/2008, -0/+2Just another reason to check out Megan Kelly
  • metist, on 06/23/2008, -4/+2...eh, better luck next timeR
  • chodder, on 06/23/2008, -1/+7Jesus, I could only watch half of that, he was doing my head in.
  • TheHim, on 06/23/2008, -1/+11The music track at the beginning is "Morphine - The Night".

    Thought i'd contribute something useful to this terrible story.
    • mm911, on 06/23/2008, -1/+1Did he pay royalties for that? Someone get RIAA on the horn.
    • ChanChan88, on 06/24/2008, -0/+1Yeah, thanks! :D
  • surfacewound, on 06/23/2008, -1/+8Wow that guy is a massive douche and not funny at all. It's pretty bad when you fail at making fun of Fox News of all things.
  • WCL23, on 06/23/2008, -1/+6Dugg for her being so hot. What i'd like to do to her would be a legal controversy for sure.
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