What is Digg?273 Comments
- napkinback, on 11/12/2007, -5/+342Wow, no one gets satire anymore?
- sn0wmis3r, on 11/12/2007, -20/+300this can't be real
- darkvad0r, on 11/09/2007, -1/+172Of course it's fake:
"From: Alexis Luthoré, COO, Comcast Internet Services"
Alexis Luthoré -> Lex Luthor anyone? - killtherebel, on 11/07/2007, -2/+122It is obviously fake, but the humor lies in the fact that Comcast really would do this if they could get away with it.
- Havoc911, on 11/07/2007, -6/+72Hahaha, you guys are idiots. Read who the so-called "memo" is from, then say "Superman" out loud to yourself. Maybe you'll get it.
For the slow: The memo is a fake. If you don't believe me, you might want to look for " Alexis Luthoré" on this page: http://www.comcast.com/corporate/about/pressroom/c ... - Baelorn, on 11/07/2007, -2/+58So much stupid ***** has happened lately. Is it really too hard to believe? Of course it isn't real, Comcast would be much more discreet about. Keep in mind there is truth in satire.
- dupswapdrop, on 11/07/2007, -4/+47Here's my plan to help comcast, two three times a day I wrap my incoming cable around a hairdryer and turn the hairdryer on high for about 5 minutes. This should limit my neighbors bandwidth and give comcast's repair idiots something to do. Plan B is to start running over comcast boxes I see on the side of the road.
- sn0wmis3r, on 11/07/2007, -6/+44I thought it was real until I got to this line:
"The Happy Bandwidth Initiative team will be using the webcams to track user eye movements, allowing our research department to identify the content that users enjoy most, so that we can charge them a modest premium to access these high-traffic pages."
Tracking eye movements? You've got to be kidding me.
However if this does turn out to be real, I guess I will have to find somewhere else to get my broadband. - SkyFire360, on 11/07/2007, -1/+36The funny part is, I bet politicians wouldn't pick up on the fact that's it's satire. We too can use the underhanded tactics of the Baby Bell telecoms and the gross misuse of information akin to the RIAA:
Someone send this to a member of the legislature that is on the fence about Net Neutrality alongside a letter from, shall we say, a 'very concerned' citizen. Don't admit to knowing this is satire, as they won't know the difference. Hell, this is more believable than the fact that the internet is NOT - in fact - a dump truck. It's quite clearly a series of tubes... - kaeves, on 11/07/2007, -0/+28While this may not be real, DON'T GIVE THEM IDEAS! I can totally see them reading this and drawing new policies based on it.
- joshuaer, on 11/07/2007, -0/+26Phase one gets you in and reading and getting more and more Pissed off. By Phase 2 you are laughing and know it is a joke!
- Nostariel, on 11/07/2007, -2/+28Dudes, MaxPC is known for a love of satire and silliness. That's all this is! Try engaging your brains once in a while. Life gets a lot more fun when you do.
XD - badenglishihave, on 11/07/2007, -6/+27"We need to establish reasonable bandwidth limits, especially among our greediest customers."
In the words of Tourettes-Guy: ***** YOU ***** YOU ***** YOU IN THE ASS!!!
Fake? Most likely, but it's way too plausible to be funny. - maisis00, on 11/08/2007, -1/+21Yes, it is a joke. Someone had a little too much free time to play with their favorite word editor. The word "brouhaha" does not appear in a letter that is submitted to a Board of Directors. Oh and I am sure the board would find great revenue potential in a new "tool bar" that tracks the user's most viewed pornographic sites. Sometimes I think satire is a dying art which very few people truly appreciate anymore. :) To whom ever wrote this thing, thanks for the smile, I needed that today. :)
- keviniskool, on 11/07/2007, -0/+20We get it. We just just wouldn't put it beyond Comcast to do something like that.
- Torx, on 11/07/2007, -1/+19Bury, lets not give Comcast ideas.
- MAGZine, on 04/22/2008, -2/+20That'll probably be what will happen. But, as it stands, the Comcast Toolbar is probably already collecting information on its users and the pages they visit. Take a look at the EULA, Section 5, part a. http://www.comcast.net/toolbar/eula/
"Some features of the Software are provided by third parties, and those third parties may collect or transmit personally identifiable and non-personally identifiable information about you in the course of providing these features." - jdpalite, on 11/07/2007, -0/+18This just in: Comcast tech tasers 400-year old Tibetan monk for bandwidth overages.
- ZombyWoof78, on 11/07/2007, -5/+23The real plan is
Phase I: Throttle Bittorrent
Phase II: ????????
Phase III: Profit! - Ironspork, on 11/07/2007, -1/+17Very well written satire. I'm especially liking the "Comcast Happy Bandwidth Initiative."
Well done. - facereplacer, on 11/07/2007, -0/+16would it be possible to organize a day where we all call to cancel service? I can either live without internet at my apartment for a month or just switch to AT&T or something for however long. I think if we shout with our money, we could make some noise.
drop the comcast day - theOster, on 11/10/2007, -1/+16"this toolbar also alerts customers before they download any file larger than 75KB" - classic.
“Are you sure you really meant to do that?” - love the past tense.
ahh, those mpc guys :) - Crazyviolinist, on 11/09/2007, -0/+15It sounds realistic enough, but if one picks up on "modest proposal" near the end, one would recognize the satirical point of the memo. Still, knowing Comcast, I wouldn't put it past them to actually try to pull off this crap.
- Anub1s, on 11/07/2007, -2/+17Were you born this stupid or is it a natural "gift"? You can't honestly read something like this and think it's from a 'professional internal memo' : "More enthusiastic users would pay between $25 and $3,275 monthly to download their regular faire of what we must assume are license-free movies and music--which are all really quite entertaining. No, they really are. There’s some really good copyright-free content out there. Seriously."
- Tenlow, on 11/07/2007, -1/+16if your argument cannot stand up to satire, it's not a very good argument.
- oslointhesummer, on 11/07/2007, -2/+16If Comcast is the only ISP, how can you switch ISPs?
- dupswapdrop, on 11/07/2007, -0/+13It injects raw RF noise into the lines screwing up the connections. High speed Internet on cable is very noise sensitive.
- Arvenis, on 11/07/2007, -2/+15Yeah, let me just sell my house and move so that I can get a different ISP. That seems like a reasonable solution.
- Haapi, on 11/07/2007, -0/+12If he was born that stupid, it would then be a natural "gift". Just sayin'.
- RadicalEdward, on 11/07/2007, -6/+18"happy" and "verizon" should never be in the same sentence
- luchid, on 11/07/2007, -0/+11Oh, thank you for saving us, Captain Obvious! You are hereby promoted to GENERAL Obvious!
- luchid, on 11/11/2007, -1/+12So instead of fining their asses for impersonating me on my transfers I should MOVE to another city just so I can get a decent Internet connection. Wow... You must live in assbackwards land.
- zyl0x, on 11/07/2007, -4/+14Forget the comments. Even the articles need to start using /sarcasm tags.
- whoCares80, on 11/12/2007, -0/+10what do you think you are doing when you "share" 6 gigs....you are uploading.
- zyl0x, on 11/06/2007, -0/+10You can spell paragraph but not knew?
I'm baffled. - CrackaPleeze, on 11/07/2007, -0/+10I was scared till i found out that Christopher Walken was gonna break the news. Then I was excited.
- DarkShroud, on 11/07/2007, -0/+9I'm keeping the devil Comcast logo.
- eliteeggnog, on 11/07/2007, -0/+9I worked for a company called "Plan B"....
- Audacitor, on 11/07/2007, -4/+13It better be fake. If it's real, I can't understand how anyone could possibly be so corrupt.
- GliTCH82, on 11/10/2007, -1/+10Dugg because my company's called Phase One. My comment buried for off-topicness and perceived shameful self-promotion.
- FuzzyBunny, on 11/07/2007, -5/+13With the way misinformation spreads on the web, this kind of things is hardly constructive.
- GLMonkey, on 11/07/2007, -0/+8Good Job Hack-Man! You have figured out my plot...mwa ha ha ha ha...lol. Some people don't get good satire.
- rmxz, on 11/07/2007, -0/+8ENCRYPTION people. We need to migrate most internet traffic (email, web browsing, bittorrent) to something that uses encryption to stop the ISPs from snooping for any reason (political censorship, bandwidth shaping, RIAA enforcement, etc).
- Sawta, on 11/06/2007, -0/+8I waz flabbergasted.
- murf43143, on 11/07/2007, -1/+9That is funny as *****.
- yuuko, on 11/07/2007, -1/+9O RLY?
- MAGZine, on 04/22/2008, -0/+8It was a gift. ;) It still should be taken seriously though, joke or not. It may not end up being this extreme, but still, am I the only person who could see Protocol restriction? Not thousands of dollars for it (which would be ridiculious), but even $5 or $10 (which is still ridiculious, but just not as much so). Average users wouldn't care, so they'd continue to do it. The webcam deal wouldn't fly, though. Not for 5 seconds.
- Evildudetx, on 11/07/2007, -0/+8Sorry, I'm a digg user - everything I read on the internet MUST be true.
- luchid, on 11/07/2007, -0/+8Nobody in their right mind would even consider it being real after reading a few lines of it, nor is the article trying hard to be real.
It's a satire piece, and a very good one I might add. If you can't distinguish then I suggest you turn off your computer and go play in traffic. - brentinkc, on 11/07/2007, -1/+9electromagnetic interference generated by the hair dryer. residential cable really isn't insulated very well
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