What is Digg?102 Comments
- jgsketch, on 02/13/2008, -3/+41Lol, Always wanted to know how full of crap I was. Now I can measure it.
- mdoom, on 02/13/2008, -1/+27wow the first time i read the headline i thought it read "five idiotic parents you've never heard of"
so i was expecting some really stupid parents. lol this works too - jessestorm, on 02/13/2008, -1/+25Poo Log:
Date
Length of Time Taken
Description
Weight of Dump - InfamousAtheist, on 02/13/2008, -4/+27#3 made it into production... it's called the Flowbee and you can view some ***** classic pictures of people using it at www.flowbee.com (someone in the comments at the site says so too... I hadn't gotten that far when I commented)
I love how the definition of #2 (turd scale) says in the description "The operation is obvious." Doesn't that disqualify an idea from patent? - chiefbttlwshr, on 02/13/2008, -1/+14Yes, many Katie Courics.
--That's a South Park reference for those missing it. - HighWastesDrftr, on 02/13/2008, -1/+13Interesting patents, awful commentary by the author.
- andydumi, on 02/13/2008, -2/+13Not that stupid. Ive seen #2 used in medical settings. And #3 is great, it vacuums up all the hair clippings. The place I get a haircut has these. And #5 is somewhat used for the bomb/mine sniffing/detecting dolphins the navy uses.
#1 and #4 are stupid though. - superheroboy, on 02/13/2008, -1/+11Couldn't you weight your feces by weighing yourself before and after a deuce?
- yohnstoppable, on 02/13/2008, -1/+10Hold an empty gatoraid bottle when you first weight yourself. Then piss into the bottle, let the duece fall, and weight yourself holding the bottle of piss. You'll be surprised at how large that post Thanksgiving duece can be. Or so I've heard...
- NinjaBoy, on 02/13/2008, -1/+8I normally drop about 1-2 pounds. I started doing this when i was a kid. I had to step over the scale to get to the toilet and thought to myself one day, hay I wonder just how much I actually *****.
But now that im writing this im starting to wonder what percentage of the food i eat my body uses. I'm going to have to weigh everything i eat this week and see how efficient i am. But then again i bet water intake would have an impact...CURSE YOU SCIENTIFIC BRAIN! - TheKitchenSinkX, on 02/13/2008, -2/+8I like how the feces weighing one was "#2" on the list. Tee hee.
- banmaster, on 02/13/2008, -3/+9Only if you held in your pee. Otherwise you'd end up measuring both.
- BurnTees, on 02/13/2008, -3/+9this article had so much potential yet sucked ass.
- Anfidurl, on 02/13/2008, -2/+8Actually, hospitals commonly weigh human excrement for various purposes.
- msqualia, on 02/13/2008, -1/+6Often hospital patent's ins and outs are monitored, so that'd be a reason for the toilet scale. However, most people under such surveillance aren't in a position to make it to a toilet easily, so it's still impractical.
- andy3109, on 02/13/2008, -1/+6I don't think I ever saw myself thinking about this.
- inactive, on 02/13/2008, -1/+62 girls 1 scale.
- wellyuk, on 02/13/2008, -0/+4You know how lame Avril Lavigne is? I'll tell you - very. She also spells "boy" as "boi".
- rogersj3, on 02/13/2008, -1/+5No - the operation is obvious on most patents. It's the idea that must be original, non-obvious, etc.
- NinjaBoy, on 02/13/2008, -1/+5I have often wondered if i'm the only person who weights himself before and after a *****. It only takes like 10 seconds I'm curious sometimes about how much i just unloaded.
- verynegative, on 02/13/2008, -0/+42/13/08
22 minutes
dark brown, spiral shaped, presence of corn
354 gr. - meez, on 02/13/2008, -0/+3Nice username...
- InfamousAtheist, on 02/13/2008, -1/+4So... what's the verdict?
I'm honestly curious. I'm also curious what made you want to do this in the first place, but just tell us how huge your dumps are please. - fancyj, on 02/13/2008, -1/+4"It sucks as it cuts."
"It certainly does, suck!" - turnesol, on 02/13/2008, -3/+6ditto
http://www.flowbee.com/ - yohnstoppable, on 02/13/2008, -1/+4"What a totally amazing, excellent discovery...NOT!"
- pyrates, on 02/13/2008, -2/+5This is useless. I can clearly see how full of ***** some people are, especially the apple fan bois.
- Ravenhaft, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2When I was a kid, I swear to god my dad tried to Flowbee my head. It scared me so bad and I ran away. That's how he still cuts his hair though. Scary.
- scallon, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2The army uses a similar setup when cutting hair. When you are buzzing a few hundred guys in a row it helps if you can minimize the cleanup.
- wellyuk, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2Colour
Consistency - RpgActioN, on 02/13/2008, -1/+32.5
- vanashk, on 02/13/2008, -1/+3It is not a flowbee. The kind of vacuum clippers described here are used by barbers all over the world to keep the hair that they trim from your neck and head from falling all over you and the floor.
- subliminalurge, on 02/13/2008, -2/+4It instantly reminded me of the Flowbee commercials, which the suck cut from Wayne's World were a spoof of.
God I'm getting too old. - Rikkochet, on 02/13/2008, -1/+3Umm, with the exception of the child anti-abduction thing, the rest are great ideas. They have limited usefulness and aren't likely to be used as sketched, but the concepts are creative and demonstrate exactly WHY we have a patent system.
Apparently bloggers fail to distinguish between good IDEAS and good IMPLEMENTATIONS. - midbc, on 02/13/2008, -1/+3check out some Japanese or Chinese ones if you wanna see weird and idiotic
- inverselogic, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2Dugg for the word "deuce".
- wellyuk, on 02/14/2008, -0/+2Oh, I didn't read that bit. I stand corrected! My reading skills were temporarily impaired by your description of turds as "duece".
- bwchambers, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2Weigh the empty bottle and subtract the weight from the you+full bottle of piss measurement. Crisis averted.
- VenDrake, on 02/13/2008, -1/+3As ***** of an invention as it actually has medical uses. It's not uncommon for the nursing staff in a hospital to monitor somone's "I's and O's" (Inputs and Outputs). Generally they're concerned with liquid intake and output to monitor somoen for dehydration, but it's sometimes they're interested in bowel movements as well...checking for constipation and the like. It's traditionally bowel monitoring has been done through descriptive phrases...large, small, medium, etc... This device would numerically quantify the measurement - and prevent the nurse from necessarily looking at / smelling your dinner.
- yohnstoppable, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2"Hold an empty gatoraid bottle when you first weight yourself"
You see, I think ahead for these type of dilemmas. The weight of the bottle is already considered upon the initial measurement - allanak, on 02/14/2008, -0/+22.5
See http://www.southparkstudios.com/show/faq/recent_fa ...
Friday, October 12, 2007
How much does a Couric weigh and what does it represent?
One Katie Couric equals 2.5 lbs - it is a unit of measurement for weighing crap. - lougoose, on 02/13/2008, -0/+21 Katie Couric is approximately 2.2 pounds of fecal matter.
- alexforcefive, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2Also, the birthday cake candle extinguisher would be really sweet for disabled children etc. This article fails on 2/5 attempts, and as such can be included in any "top 10 ***** articles ever" list cracked.com might write
- slundal, on 02/13/2008, -1/+3Most of these aren't so dumb as the writer want's to make out.
- snoonoo, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2Dear Diary:
16 FREAKIN POUNNNNNNN-DA! - dualityim, on 02/14/2008, -0/+2First message from the Dolphins:
"So long and thanks for all the fish." - meez, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2XKCD was right about nerd sniping =o)
- innocentsinner, on 02/13/2008, -0/+2Agreed. Not to mention that a few of these aren't really -that- idiotic. Out of the millions, these were the worst he could find?
- lougoose, on 02/14/2008, -0/+1Naw, it was definitely 2.2
- fatTJ, on 02/15/2008, -0/+1So they haven't patented the E-Meter?
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