What is Digg?250 Comments
- eatsleeptrumpet, on 10/10/2007, -19/+127I like turtles
- aldenhg, on 10/25/2007, -4/+10721: There's porn on every hard drive, no matter how much you don't want to think of the user looking at porn.
- Universal, on 10/10/2007, -3/+100"Some people will never learn"
Quote of life. - TheKillDoctor, on 10/10/2007, -2/+73User: Wow! It's fixed! What was causing all my problems?
Tech: Solar flare activity was very high yesterday and it took until today for the light to reach earth.
User: Really? I think I read about that on CNN. - jackmaht, on 10/10/2007, -5/+70#21: No one speaks English.
- twrife, on 10/10/2007, -4/+67You could sum up about half of that article with: "Everyone lies."
- Waskonator, on 10/10/2007, -4/+59Dugg.
I work in a call center for student loans. Apparently every 18 year old has "perfect credit", and can't understand why their FICO score doesn't even exist yet.
FTW. - HallsOfMandos, on 10/10/2007, -1/+52#21 Your only bonus after 6 months of doing tech support will be an indentation on your desk that eerily resembles your forehead.
- dvsbastard, on 10/10/2007, -0/+46"The hold button is your friend"
Personally, I prefer the mute button... Just double check the handset is muted before you let loose a barrage of swearing, insults and violent threats... or you can find yourself with some explaining to do... :( - superalamar, on 10/10/2007, -1/+46#21, that girl who you end up talking two three times a week because her equipment is ***** and has chronic issues....she looks nothing like you think she does. In fact, anyone nice to tech support over the phone is likely ugly, no matter how sexy you may think they sound.
#22 Your companies sales department has no problem selling ***** that has no chance in hell of working. Ever. - marcwrz, on 10/10/2007, -0/+43Haha oh god, so true. I worked IT for a year...My number 21? College Professors are dumber than anyone else. Go Figure.
- razorswc, on 10/10/2007, -1/+36This is so true. Especially the last one. Those little kids can run laps around their parents as far as knowing what to do and/or following directions
- oojamaflip2006, on 10/10/2007, -1/+36'This is so you can rub the lie in their face, fixing the issue is just a perk' Oh dear I'm so guilty of this. I feel so ashamed, yet surprisingly smug.
- jer2eydevil88, on 10/10/2007, -1/+36It's a joke. The best advice I can give you is to Just ***** Laugh.
- johnnycornholer, on 10/10/2007, -2/+34Who says porn is immoral anyway?
- lordtyros, on 10/10/2007, -4/+35You could sume up all of that article with: "Users are idiots."
- Murdats, on 10/10/2007, -1/+31You mean like in "The IT Crowd"
phone rings, machine answers
"Hello, IT how can I help you"
blablalba
"Have you tried turning it off and on again"
bla bla
"Are you sure its plugged in"
oh there we go thanks - wmarcello, on 10/10/2007, -0/+29Reminds me of a page from my Dilbert calendar recently...
Dogbert: This is Dogbert's tech support. Your problem is caused by another company's product or services. User: Shouldn't I tell you my problem before you determine the cause?
Dogbert: Okay, let's pretend that will change my answer. - bradleyland, on 10/10/2007, -0/+28I'm 30, and I've been working on other people's computers since I graduated highschool, which puts me at a paltry twelve years, but in those twelve years, I've seen only one computer without porn of any kind on it. The woman using it assumed that her employer could see everything she did. We "failed to inform her otherwise."
- Matt-lars, on 10/10/2007, -1/+26Que?
- javierror, on 10/10/2007, -7/+31haha you for sure thought you would get dugg with that safe observation
- psykiv, on 10/10/2007, -10/+31#17 is the most true. if you're just going to do your own thing, why the hell did you call me? don't call me when things are even worse a few hours later.
and in case it goes down:
# Substance abusers and computer operators are the only folks called users. This isn't by chance
# When in doubt. Reboot
# Sooner or later you will meet a person who types out the words "backslash" or forgets to plug in the power cord. If you haven't yet, just wait, you will
# Fear the phone. No one just calls tech support to wish you good morning
# No user will tell you the whole truth at the beginning of a call
# "I didn't do anything" or "It just happened" Are the users mantra
# As a support tech, it is your job to break down resistance and get the truth
# This is so you can rub the lie in their face, fixing the issue is just a perk
# Some people will never learn
# This means you will always have a job
# Maintain a calm voice, even if you're screaming on the inside
# The hold button is your friend
# Whatever you do, don't panic
# The answer to all users questions should be "Trust me, I know what I'm doing" even if this is a bald-faced lie
# Users can smell fear. Once you've lost control, all is lost
# A user who is not listening to you anymore, but rather is trying "their own thing" is not worth your time. Simulate a telephone disconnect and hang up. Trust me, you're better off.
# Sometimes fixing a computer is easier than figuring out why it was broken
# Users always want a reason things are fixed. If you're not sure just lie. They won't know anyway. "A stray electron passed through the processor and caused..."
# If possible ask to speak to the youngest person present - siggy1997, on 10/10/2007, -1/+22I had a user that I told to reboot her computer. Then she said it's still not working. So I went to her desk and had her reboot again. The lady turned the monitor off and turned it back on again. I almost couldn't help but laugh because she thought rebooting meant turning the monitor on and off again. Some people shouldn't be able to use computers. But then again if I didn't have people like that I wouldn't have a job.
- Trax91, on 10/10/2007, -2/+20"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former"
-Albert Einstein - FatherG, on 10/10/2007, -0/+17Mute is superior in some situations for one major reason; it doesn't count against your hold-time.
- hmemcpy, on 10/10/2007, -0/+15Yup. I worked at tech support. I fear the phone.
- BayAreaKing, on 10/10/2007, -0/+15- If you don't speak English well, be prepared to encounter many angry, pissed off people
- siszam, on 10/10/2007, -2/+15Wrong!
FACT 1 : It's not a fact just because you say it is.
FACT 2: You can get a home loan with a little something called manual underwriting when you don't have a credit score. If you have a good job history, a history of paying rent and utilities on time and a down payment you can buy a home. Ask Churchhill Mortgage.
FACT 3: A credit score is a debt score. If you aren't paying on debt and interest you can save and buy a home with cash. That means you never have to live in a house the bank owns. You can buy cars, houses, all kinds of things if you live on less than you make and save the rest. - Lasereth, on 10/10/2007, -0/+12We have around 500 computers here and it takes 10 minutes to re-image one with Ghost. How often can you fix an average FUBAR problem in less than 10 minutes? Back up their My Documents and re-image FTW
- inactive, on 10/10/2007, -0/+12Nope. We surf between cals.
- inactive, on 10/10/2007, -0/+12Thats why you should use the Hold Button instead - the mute button is more likely to fail you.
- 911ducktail, on 10/10/2007, -5/+16"bald face lie?" its "bold face lie"
- inactive, on 10/10/2007, -0/+11There are also millions of 8-year-olds who can do what the person calling tech support has not managed to do.
I can guess what side of the call you are on. Idiots, such as yourself, often like to blame IT and tech support for problems of their own making.
Tell you what. Next time you are too lazy or stupid to read the ***** manual and break something, fix it yourself because you have just stated that any 8-year-old can do it. - sabach, on 10/10/2007, -1/+12What amazes me is the otherwise bright individuals (engineers, accountants, attorneys, etc) who turn into brain-dead idiots when they sit down at a computer. When I try to explain something to them I can see the glassy, empty look come over their eyes and I know I've lost them completely.
- inactive, on 10/10/2007, -2/+13If possible ask to speak to the youngest person present. lol Dugg.
- DebbilsAdvocate, on 10/10/2007, -1/+11I'm disappointed that after almost 400 diggs, nobody has yet commented that they swiped the BOFH logo for that article. What kind of techies are you? We're talking about the original IT curmudgeon. *shakes head*
- mal1964, on 10/10/2007, -1/+11I love the sweet smell of tech support fear!
- Kyouto, on 10/10/2007, -0/+9Haha reminds me of my training in tech support.... I was listening in with this guy on a call, he asks her if she made any changes to her computer and she said no. He hits the mute button and yells "You're a damn liar!!" Great start to a tech support job, lemme tell you. Now I know exactly how he felt.
- mcbaggert, on 10/10/2007, -2/+10"when in doubt reboot" - we could replace the tech support from our office with a recording and poster of that quote and be completely fine!
- dragonexe, on 10/10/2007, -1/+9"A credit score is a debt score. If you aren't paying on debt and interest you can save and buy a home with cash. That means you never have to live in a house the bank owns. You can buy cars, houses, all kinds of things if you live on less than you make and save the rest."
Yeah, if you don't mind living in a refrigerator box in the Hardee's parking lot for the first 7-8 years of your working life. I'd like to know what person comes out of college with the money to buy a house just because they've never owned a credit card... Though in general, that's a good, but obvious point, avoid paying interest when you can. That's why I pay my credit card in full every month. There's no danger in owning a credit card if you can keep it paid off. Just make sure you use it as if you were spending cash right out of your wallet. I just use it for the convenience. So, please explain to me how it is a "debt score" in my case, where I've built up great credit without building up any debt? - kflott, on 10/10/2007, -1/+9http://img524.imageshack.us/img524/4199/leetli6.jpg
- nathanwalker, on 10/10/2007, -0/+8No. Im talking to a customer and typing this now. I work all day playing on digg. hah
- confusednazgul, on 10/10/2007, -0/+8I absolutely agree. I was a "computer technician" for a visual and performing arts college for two years. The professors were by far some of the dumbest people I've ever dealt with (in terms of technology). But they'd still look down on me and always ask if I was sure I could fix their problems because I'm female. Gotta love it.
- cawpin, on 10/10/2007, -0/+7No, he doesn't. Look it up.
- hexcr03, on 10/10/2007, -1/+8User: The TV wont work on the computer!
Tech: Sir we dont support TV's
User: No it says Dell on it!
Tech: ok what color is the little light on the lower right?
User: Uh, its white.
Tech: No, there is no white light on the monitor sir.
User: OK IM NOT REALLY NEAR THE COMPUTER, ITS ON ANOTHER FLOOR, SEND SOMEONE TO JUST FIX IT!!!
Tech: Are you there? sir, im having trouble hearing you, please call back if you can hear me. thank you for calling! - Jimbob0i0, on 10/10/2007, -0/+7buy a home with cash?
In the UK the average first time buyer has a house (well a mainsonette at best more likely a flat) of 150k and the minimum (a crappy 1 bed flat) will be about 90k - this can be verified at findaproperty.com and other websites (I have just purchased my first property and am up to date near enough on the prices).
The average earning in the uk is 20k/annum
So that would require saving roughly 8 years (when you count for moving costs, stamp duty, initial furniture, etc etc) without any outgoings. For a one bedroom flat rent is around 650 a month of you are lucky. So that's nearly 8k a year - not counting utility bills, tax and so on - this is in teh greater london area (specifically Surrey).
In short unless you inherit a lot of money or have everything paid for you by your parents and you have no life for many years there is no way to buy a home on cash never living in a place the bank owns. - Zaphrod, on 10/10/2007, -0/+7Give me a break, most users have enough trouble logging in on their own. Given access rights and enough time they would completely destroy their PC's. Companies need tech support because most employees have no idea how to use a computer.
- JonLatane, on 10/10/2007, -0/+7"Fear the phone. No one just calls tech support to wish you good morning"
Well you know what? I'm going to call a tech support service that has given me good service (probably Apple) and wish them a good day during my lunch break. I suggest everyone else do the same. - beattycoon, on 10/10/2007, -0/+721) The words "We don't support that" just doesn't register with most people. Why are you calling your ISP about issues with your Ipod?
21.5) You can always count on some jackass from the company they were actually supposed to be calling to tell them they were supposed to call you. "My internet works just fine, I can go to every site ever created in the history of the universe at blazing speeds, but I can't use my phone. Vonage says it's your fault"
22. Rebooting solves about 98.7% of all problems. -
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