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124 Comments
- thegrantman, on 03/03/2009, -3/+69It would be kinder to shoot them.
- quato, on 03/03/2009, -2/+43I think they used the same techniques in Guantanamo Bay.
- ChuyMatt, on 03/03/2009, -1/+36It is an old idea, but is it still funny.
The local bus depot blasts classical music to keep the kids away. It seems to work and makes the emo kids even more emo, if possible. - michaelpinto, on 03/03/2009, -1/+32This may have the opposite effect as 40+ types who remember Manilow flee in droves while the younger set rediscovers him...
- WordsnCollision, on 03/03/2009, -0/+28Michael Bolton's the backup act.
- RumpleForeskin3, on 03/03/2009, -0/+25Ha Ha Ha You Dumb Bastard. It's Not a Schooner... it's a Sailboat
- chadwalters23, on 03/03/2009, -0/+24That will only attract a new and different variety of mall rat. Then you have mall rat wars. Terrible plan.
- n9ne9n9ne, on 03/03/2009, -0/+24But can he keep the kid off the escalator?
- Efilnikufesin, on 03/03/2009, -1/+22"MANILOOOOOW!"
- Stephen Colbert - darkz77, on 03/03/2009, -0/+17They are just going to end up with middle-aged mall rats.
- tgjerusalem, on 03/03/2009, -0/+15How big is Christchurch, and do these teens have anywhere better to go hang out in public?
If the options are the mall with Barry, or nowhere, I think they'll get used to it. - JRowe3388, on 03/03/2009, -4/+19"Hey guys, lets drive out all the kids who spend their money buying stuff here."
"Sounds good." - dagnabbit, on 03/03/2009, -1/+14They've been doing this in Minneapolis for a while now, at certain corners downtown. I don't think it works because last week I was walking by and 2 cops had their guns drawn on about 5 guys, while the classical music played. It was kind of surreal.
- mywhitenoise, on 03/03/2009, -0/+11Barry Manilow isn't THAT bad. But if you play some Panic At The Disco, Paramore, or Fallout Boy, I'm out of there.
- cnot3, on 03/03/2009, -0/+10that no talent ass-clown
- piattorney, on 03/03/2009, -0/+9agreed. Cruel and unusual punishment!
- graywolfz10, on 03/03/2009, -0/+9...Im sorry for you?
- MisterEX, on 03/03/2009, -0/+8Barry Manilow looks like a hobbit.
- jumpyg1258, on 03/03/2009, -2/+10First you take a run at La Fours with a sock full of quarters. I'd do it, but I pulled my back at humping your mom last night. Nooch. Okay, you clock him on his headpiece and knock his ass out cold. That's when phase two kicks in. I attack the structure Wolvie Berzerk style, and knock out the *****' pin and bickety bam, the ***** is rubble. Hence, no game show.
- fabkebab, on 03/03/2009, -0/+8I wonder if Barry likes the idea - presumably he gets royalties for it, and has the chance to reach a new audience!
- m3arvk, on 03/03/2009, -0/+8I'm trying to imagine the Barry Manilow crowd wearing sleeveless leather jackets with switchblades drawn.
- davidg11, on 03/03/2009, -1/+8I'll bet it works on unruly diggers too.
Ohhhhhh MANDY!
well you came and you gave without taking
But I sent you away
Ohhhhhh Mandy
Well you kissed me and stopped me from shaking
And I need you today
Ohhhhhh Mandy.
-----------------
Look...the sarcasm melts away..they don't know what to do...they're lost...they're leaving to digg up a cute hamster.. - Takfam, on 03/03/2009, -1/+8A schooner IS a sailboat stupid head!
- jlm408, on 03/03/2009, -0/+7Christ, now I'll never be able to get my mother out of the mall.
- XenoSNK, on 03/03/2009, -0/+6Enya?
- K4Lic0, on 03/03/2009, -1/+7Why would that work? I doubt teenagers are at the mall for the ambient music.
- irishjays, on 03/03/2009, -1/+7Meanwhile in the nearby city of SatanLair, Heavy Metal is being played to incite youngsters to violence.
- Reveillark, on 03/03/2009, -0/+6tell em Steve Dave!
- Chompy, on 03/03/2009, -1/+7Even Bush wouldn't go that far.
- topstorynz, on 03/03/2009, -0/+6The kid in the story's name is seriously Belcher???
- Taasaki, on 03/03/2009, -1/+6i actually kinda like barry. not the worst thing they could play
- PopcornDave, on 03/03/2009, -0/+5No, cardigan sweaters and sansabelt with switchblades drawn.
- giveer, on 03/03/2009, -0/+5I think they want them to leave, not cozy up and nap. :)
- AmyVernon, on 03/03/2009, -0/+4Yeah, I was kinda thinking the same thing. I would not frequent a mall that played Barry Manilow songs.
- mrfunktastic, on 03/03/2009, -0/+4Exactly: he's got retro caché. Copa Cabana bitches!
- Alli3388, on 03/03/2009, -1/+5I love Barry Manilow.
- rdldr1, on 03/03/2009, -0/+4Darwinism will take effect when malls are filled with Barry Manilow loving mall rats.
- mnemy, on 03/03/2009, -0/+3You know, I'm a 24 male that spends plenty of cash at malls. Your stupid high pitched CRT noises and Barry Manilow also piss ME off. You know, one of the customers that spends hundreds of dollars at your stores.
I'll be happy to move my shopping to online. Enjoy destroying your business. - MisterEX, on 03/03/2009, -0/+3A lot of teenagers just loiter around the malls as merely a hangout. The amount of time they are there compared to what they spend is not advantageous for the malls, especially if they drive out other potential customers.
- inactive, on 03/03/2009, -1/+4New Zealand. Fail.
- m3arvk, on 03/03/2009, -1/+4Exactly what I thought but it does say "unruly" teens. Still not sure their logic is sound because won't everyone be affected?
- TrichomeKid, on 03/03/2009, -0/+3I'd have to say that the kids buying stuff are generally the ones who go in, spend their money and leave. From my experience (friend's wife/friends work in retail at the mall) the punk kids loitering aren't standing there with bags in their hand.
- Dalhectar, on 03/03/2009, -0/+2The ACLU is probably in America. Pretty sure that A doesn't stand for New Zealand.
- MarkusX, on 03/03/2009, -1/+4serves him right, his music puts people to sleep.
- Frozo, on 03/03/2009, -0/+3You all just forced me to close the browser window. BYE!
- MadThrasher, on 03/03/2009, -0/+3who the hell are these above mentioned bands? sounds terrible
- monkeyhoward, on 03/03/2009, -0/+3Okay Lunchbox, let's try this again. We tie you to the roof and you jump off and sail like a Spitfire passing right over the arch nemesis La Fours. You then swing up to the stage and knock out the pin. And when that's gone the stage is trashed and we go smoke a bowl. You got it? Now get your fat ass up there. And dude, don't forget your helmet. Snoogens.
- TwolfJB, on 03/03/2009, -0/+3i think its how we won in granada too
- infinitus64, on 03/03/2009, -0/+3Everyone is the middle east love Lionel Richie music so no.
- fancywares319, on 03/03/2009, -0/+3thats what i came here for
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