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youtube.com - Musician and Best Buy employee, Keith Parsons, rocks his Best Buy holiday campaign audition.
52 Comments
- thegamingguy, on 02/12/2009, -1/+34Bootleg Sports-Onion knockoff. Not funny to me at least.
- inactive, on 02/12/2009, -2/+21“I first notice there was… …were some speakin problem when I got fired from job at ESPN, where on NFL Countdowns,” said Smith, “but I knew it were time to gets help when I tried to type up my resu… my res… my List of Job. Not only did my word prospector get blowed up, but my computer gets blowed up, too.”
uhh... really? - EMFK, on 02/12/2009, -0/+17FTA: "...University Chancellor Dr Bernard Machen. “He may be illiterate, but he’s still a Gator.”
ROTFLMAO! - iamjero, on 02/12/2009, -0/+12Slanderous and lame. Not even remotely funny, and Really is degrading an a mildly offensive way.
Definitely buried for being pure garbage. Aikman and Emmitt were and will always be awesome. Why would you knock not one but two hall of famers? Must of been wrote by an eagles or redskins fan.
Oh yeah, and im sure you can tell im a boys fan. :D - Coffeedemon, on 02/12/2009, -0/+10He'd fit right in here on Digg.
- goatomatic, on 02/12/2009, -0/+9I don't know, the Wine and Excrement sounds like a really credible source.
- inactive, on 02/12/2009, -0/+9Well, that attempt at parody was a gigantic bag of suck.
- whyteeford, on 02/12/2009, -0/+7FTA: "“How ‘bout them Cowboys?!” hollered one fan when asked about Emmitt. When asked his name, he simply yelled again, “How ‘bout them Cowboys?”
The fan took a deep breath, presumably to ask a third time – just in case anyone within the acre hadn’t heard him – but a mysterious man in a green jersey promptly punched him square in the mouth. The man in green then described his actions as “community service.” Next, he then proceeded to grab the Dallas fans Stetson hat and pass wind upon it, presumably continuing his community service project."
Someone needs to tell this author to never publish anything ever again. - winstonc, on 02/12/2009, -0/+7Wow, this was a lame attempt at Onion-style humor. The headline was promising, but the article didn't deliver the goods.
- Ersh777, on 02/12/2009, -0/+4Stupid non-onion satire....fell for it for a minute.
- flyingclutchman, on 02/12/2009, -0/+4This site is just an unfunny Onion btw
- praisethelard, on 02/12/2009, -0/+4I didn't realize it could be made up with quotes like "The parody is the last refuge of the frustrated writer" and "In times like these it is not difficult to write satire" plastered on the page.
- Whackly, on 02/12/2009, -0/+4I dunno which would be worse; that there may be somebody dumb enough to not realize it's satire or that you, upon realizing it was satire, thought it was close enough to the truth to get all indignant about the idea that somebody might be dumb enough to not realize it's satire. That is, unless, what you said was satire. That would make me the *****.
- crunchdigg, on 02/12/2009, -0/+475 percent of the players would never get to play, then,
even with the majors most often being "Criminal Justice"
and "Physical Education". - klipseracer, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3get blowed up. Thats hilarious.
- Wreckage, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3Now he can get a good job and make some money.
- CrazedLeper, on 02/12/2009, -1/+4College is overrated and overpriced. That should not be mistaken as an endorsement for illiteracy, however.
- gregofla, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3I think someone needs to join Emmitt (if they think this is real).
- gregofla, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3Ummm yeah, the site pretty much says that it is for parody (that means it's not real).
- OPR8R, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3How did this crap make the front page?
- crunchdigg, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3OK, now I'm really confused.
- klipseracer, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3@orwell2112:
How many tires can roll without a wheel aka rim on the inside?
I'd love to see your car drive with just a tire. No wheel to seal the air chamber = you need to use better examples to prove your point. And no, I DON'T know what you mean. What the ***** are you trying to say? - inactive, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3Emmitt is a ***** douchebag, meet him in person and your opinion would probably change.
- Tom10803, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3No harm no foul to the illiterate
- penguinxp, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3what a heaping pile of *****. i wish i had more accounts so i could bury this more.
- Whackly, on 02/12/2009, -0/+3"But totally not true."
\duh - stuffblock, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2Run Emmitt ruuuuuuunn.
- izolutionz, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2Dugg for the Mighty Bruins!
- Barbarino, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2Dude is terrible on tv... Surprisingly, Keyshawn is dam good..
- blankhorizons, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2Dude, maybe you should pick up a book once in a while. The word is "parody".
- JBHasty, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2how did he go to florida? yea he probably didnt go to any classes
- inactive, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2Fun, Mehmet, Fuuuuuuun.
- bink0, on 02/12/2009, -1/+3Wouldn't digg be considered a knockoff as well?
- CrazedLeper, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2Did I say that college is useless? The employment market has way too many philosophy majors right now, is all. There is plenty that one can learn on one's own--especially with the advent of the internet age. The institutionalization of *anything* will eventually cause as many problems as it solves.
- painting, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2people think its real.
- Whackly, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2crunchdigg,
me too! - Valyn, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2Being that this is from some unknown Onion flunky, a lot of people are going to believe this crap.
- ThugThrasher, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2Actually, there would probably just be more of a concentrated effort at cheating to get the players through without getting caught.
- mrdctaylor, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2If they are going to make fun of someone they probably shouldn't have picked someone as intelligent and successful as Emmitt Smith. There are plenty of ex-NFL ball players that aren't that bright, but Emmit isn't one of them. He can dance like a mofo too.
- tbechtx, on 02/12/2009, -0/+2Way to go Troy! You are a class act my friend.
- orwell2112, on 02/12/2009, -0/+1Who is Mehmet?
- berroci, on 02/12/2009, -0/+1They used to be real whistleblowers, though unfortunately they'd mostly blow the whistle on farting polar bears.
- Foot56, on 02/12/2009, -2/+3To be honest, I wish that the NFL would make a rule that you must finish college before entering the NFL Draft.
- nampaguy, on 02/12/2009, -1/+2Hey guys a questionably funny "parady" story. But totally not true. check out the website, just another failed attempt at being humorous.
- orwell2112, on 02/12/2009, -1/+1You right, cause the onion is the only site that be allowed to do satire, or leastways the only ones folks will be able to understand and feel comfy with.
- doihi, on 02/12/2009, -2/+2Emitt Smith is the waterboy, may not be the brightest bulb, but tore it up on the field....and now at recess.
Momma says Emitt Smith is a dummy, but he can run good with that Foosball.
Thats great for Troy and Emitt, but Florida looks the stupidest out of them all
"Alligators are ornery because of their medulla oblongata!" - Logan2784, on 02/12/2009, -2/+2Sounds pretty sensationalized to me- Emitt Smith's grammar isn't THAT bad. I feel like this article belongs in STAR Magazine.
- NissanNut, on 02/13/2009, -0/+0I get confused listening to Emmit talk on ESPN, so this is nothing.
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