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You Know You're an American When You Look at a World Map and See This.(Pic)

doheth.co.uk — Brutally honest... naaahhh. Twisted, and possibly more than a little realistic... definitely. Bound to offend 'folks'...maybe. But I think it's funny as hell, and at the very least you'll find amusing

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  • dcbrown07, on 10/11/2007, -144/+81sad but true
    • hrhs556x, on 10/11/2007, -168/+22Why is it sad?
    • NeMeSiS187, on 10/11/2007, -20/+109actually diamonds are a little more to the north and to the west for me.
    • mikefitz2, on 10/11/2007, -111/+24Sad? Nah
      True? Yea
    • coit, on 10/11/2007, -50/+145I don't know, it looks pretty spot on to me.
    • trer, on 10/11/2007, -54/+295it's sad because it illustrates how the media has molded our minds into a more simplistic way of thinking while at the same time the mantra that we are "independent and free" is constantly drilled into our heads.

      "The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing everyone he didn't exist."
    • tjr7n, on 10/11/2007, -21/+104It's sad that it says we bombed Hainan when it looks like they meant Vietnam. And Americans are bad at geography. . .

      hahaha
    • M3RCINIAN, on 10/11/2007, -85/+53Woo yay americans suck at geography, we get the idea. However, you don't need to make a map which essentially insults all other countries in the world. Would americans appreciate it if I submitted a story of "how british people see the world" and label usa with "fat bastards"?
    • david76, on 10/11/2007, -100/+695Buried as inaccurate. Half of the US couldn't find America to begin with.
    • 5JimBob, on 10/11/2007, -38/+18Don't cry. One can construct such a map around any country on the planet. One thing I would add is in the "Bombed Here" category: there should be red dots over Pearl Harbor and New York. You might also want to add "Cocaine" in South America - worth at least as much as coffee.
    • CanceledCzech, on 10/11/2007, -23/+6Instead of just "more," they should have made it "Moar America!"
    • JAshbaugh, on 10/11/2007, -65/+254Most Americans don't know where Alaska is.. buried as inaccurate
    • noahhoward, on 10/11/2007, -36/+10No no no, Americans can't find America on a map. Buried as inaccurate.
    • norman619, on 10/11/2007, -12/+4@M3RCINIAN:

      Only if it's true!
    • Spuy767, on 10/11/2007, -15/+7I like how they attempted to copy, I think it was monty python unsuccessfully. It's supposed to read, simply, "Here Be Dragons."
    • bushawa, on 10/11/2007, -16/+25Stupid people anywhere will believe anything that is told to them by someone who seems to have more authority than themselves. Hence why the Roman Catholic church was able to control so many people back when being illiterate and unable to write was common place for the majority of people.
    • iceperson, on 10/11/2007, -11/+508I think India's "curry" has probably been replaced with "my old job".
    • Hetman, on 10/11/2007, -29/+16"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing everyone he didn't exist."

      If I never hear this Little bit of great knowledge I will be a happier man. Secondly the map is funny because most of Americans stereotypes of different countries are ridiculous and simple.
    • iceperson, on 10/11/2007, -14/+299"most of Americans stereotypes of different countries are ridiculous and simple."

      What a ridiculous and simple stereotype...
    • unibomber999, on 10/11/2007, -5/+97Gotta love a over generalization about over generalization.
    • Abennobashi, on 10/11/2007, -10/+54Wow, I certainly don't like being plunged into the stereotype of American dumbasses.
    • praisethelard, on 06/06/2008, -9/+39How the hell did Hollywood get up near the redwood forrests?
    • gixxer07, on 10/11/2007, -26/+4quote / I think India's "curry" has probably been replaced with "my old job". / quote

      - I bet your wife divorced you too.. lol
    • AWBoy666, on 10/11/2007, -13/+3Buried as inaccurate since most of us Americans wouldn't know where those countries are on a map.......
    • astrofizix, on 10/11/2007, -3/+22yup, could use a few more red dots though.
    • th3heretic, on 10/11/2007, -26/+12America, ***** YEA! (hopes someone knows where that is from)
    • drobati, on 10/11/2007, -17/+8Wtf is up with all these old images being dugg up. This crap has been floating around for years why is it that digg can't find anything New and Funny. ***** annoying.
    • GoatMonkey2112, on 10/11/2007, -6/+165Why is this being dugg? It's just a regular map.
    • Wormfather, on 10/11/2007, -6/+10@M3RCINIAN

      I hate to be the one to point this out to you but the site that this map is on has a .uk extension...should I explain to you what that means?

      Dolt.
    • bassmule, on 10/11/2007, -6/+14Celebrating ignorance just isn't all that funny anymore.
    • thekms, on 10/11/2007, -3/+17Not to hijack, but I think this is the original from which this map was based on (has some similarities, like the Kangaroos):
      http://humor.beecy.net/misc/world/world-according-to-regan.gif

      (may have been posted already, but I'm not scouring through all these comments)
    • VinceNoir, on 10/11/2007, -14/+4@M3ERCINIAN

      Actually, I think that would be quite an honest assessment of the U.S. Obesity is a huge issue here. ;P People don't want to learn to eat right, they want justification for their own bad habits and to indulge themselves on every whim. Americans as a whole are lazy, stupid, fat bastards. I feel like a ***** alien living in this *****, but I'm stuck here. I can't afford to leave. The tragedy of being born into a declining nation. America is quickly losing it's relevance on the global stage which is why there is so much posturing and acting out by our government and businesses. It's a sad state of affairs. This country isn't anywhere near what it was when I was born a short 37 years ago. Back then you could grab just about any 30 year old guy on the street and ask him when he built a crystal radio set and he'd be able to tell you. Now, kids just buy crap instead. No wonder we're being inundated with idiots in the job market. We're no longer producers of ANYTHING. We're a nation of useless middle-men who try and insert ourselves into any revenue flow that we can find. Doesn't matter what it is or whether it's even ethical or moral as long as it takes a lot of money out of someone else's pocket. How many of you idiots on Digg honestly produce something original? Not a service, but an actual original product that is helpful to society on a grand scale? That's what America USED to do. Not any more. Now the only thing we have is idiots who do nothing more than scan for the next "big thing" and then try to ride it out for all it's worth. Absolutely no value at all.
    • cbuddha42, on 10/11/2007, -1/+3@ iceperson

      I wanted India to say old jobs too! Far stronger association with today's outsourcing than curry.
    • devriesm, on 10/11/2007, -3/+30Do people actually believe ALL Americans think this way? If so I'm a little disheartened to realize that the world thinks this way of myself and fellow country men due to some high profile morons.
    • Chazzer3, on 10/11/2007, -1/+7What was once said about Comic Sans? Nevermind.
    • MxM111, on 10/11/2007, -8/+56The ACTUAL title should be "How Brits think Americans see the world". So this is a stereotype about a stereotype.
    • Anthem26, on 10/11/2007, -17/+15Buried as inaccurate. The United States don't have any friends...
    • 9Digits, on 10/11/2007, -2/+6At the very least I found it to be a lame-assed OLD joke that's been around since the 80's.
    • nnnet, on 10/11/2007, -1/+7So, it is true that the earth is flat.....
    • Cloud7654, on 10/11/2007, -3/+3The bomb which I'm assuming was supposed to be the atomic bomb during WWII isn't even on Japan.... it's in South Korea instead.
    • specialK16, on 10/11/2007, -6/+3Maybe this is why most of the world is anti-american anyways.
    • xxNIRVANAxx, on 10/11/2007, -4/+3I prefer this one... there's less detail:
      http://laguiri.blogia.com/upload/20060621231742-world.gif
    • badjoke, on 10/11/2007, -2/+3M3RCINIAN's a troll. He goes around being obnoxious and derogatory so he can get some attention and conflict.
    • SamKellett, on 10/11/2007, -0/+4There should be nothing where Vietnam is, just water.

      "That never happened...."
    • LovingDigg, on 10/11/2007, -2/+3Haha! This is so true, without looking at Australia I thought... "Kangaroo land". It's so correct!
    • hoovcluck, on 10/11/2007, -2/+2I thought it was going to be a picture of Israel.
    • Rileyper, on 10/11/2007, -3/+1Inaccurate, Osama Bin Laden is in a palace in India
    • LonesomeFighter, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2@Cloud7654

      i think the red dots are where America was bombed, not where we bombed. We bombed many more places. Also i think all those red dots are really just American Embassy's that got bombed.
    • kingfoot, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1"moose"... lol

      /awesome
    • MrFatalistic, on 10/11/2007, -0/+4I'm pretty sure we're right about the Moose/Hockey bit.
    • Indigo36, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2"it's sad because it illustrates how the media has molded our minds into a more simplistic way of thinking while at the same time the mantra that we are "independent and free" is constantly drilled into our heads."

      I live in Sweden, i didn't even graduate from college and i can still name most of the countries in the world and their respective leaders. The media blames their problems on music, movies and video games while people blame the media.
      And yes, the media is doing a bad job in general. The rest of the world is being told about every single mistake America is doing while America gets ***** stories about emos and cats that nurse puppies in other countries. But you have to understand, America rules the world and you know it which means you'll get away with putting anything you want on tv, and what you want isn't your occupation of a innocent country, it's cats nursing puppies while the rest of the world is watching in terror every time you ***** up.
    • Icklehamsta, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1http://www.jigsawlounge.co.uk/kungfu/world/world-usa2003.gif
  • filmbandit, on 10/11/2007, -120/+15although true -- buried for being something i stumbled across 3 years ago
    • AntBing, on 10/11/2007, -9/+127Does that make you 3 years cooler than me?
    • Prysorra, on 10/11/2007, -12/+44BURIED AS INACCURATE.

      FRANCE IS AN ENEMY!
    • Rileyper, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2Then why didn't you post it.
  • FameMoney, on 10/11/2007, -13/+12At least is pretty descriptive.
  • dikdug, on 10/11/2007, -16/+114Funny, but needs more red dots. A lot more.
    • Dycacian, on 10/11/2007, -15/+171Yeah you would think they would put a dot on the spot where we dropped out biggest bomb.
    • Slovenian6474, on 10/11/2007, -17/+5Because they're our friends
    • purdueAl, on 10/11/2007, -23/+100@dikdug

      Maybe it would be easier if they put a dot were the US hasn't bombed.
    • lysernix, on 10/11/2007, -7/+69Throw more dots, more dots, more dots! K, stop dots.
    • Mastema, on 10/11/2007, -11/+6@Dycacian "Yeah you would think they would put a dot on the spot where we dropped our biggest bomb."

      You mean the White House?
    • ethnicman, on 10/11/2007, -7/+2What about all the little islands in the pacific where A-bombs and H-bombs were tested? Shouldn't those be marked with a red dot as well?
    • nicktripp, on 10/11/2007, -1/+12Who's agitating my dots?
  • adsoftheworld, on 10/11/2007, -10/+116Here is another similar map. Check out how the US is characterized (click the preview image)
    http://adsoftheworld.com/media/print/discovery_channel_world_map
    • Abennobashi, on 10/11/2007, -12/+2Wow, who put hollywood out into the middle of california? Do they have a dot for discovery channel dumbasses?
    • dotMH, on 10/11/2007, -2/+10*Salma Hayek
      :D
    • spudnic, on 10/11/2007, -3/+4"Wow, who put hollywood out into the middle of california?"

      The fact there's barely any labels and they're all crappy is kinda the point of the ad.
    • PueSi, on 10/11/2007, -1/+4Salma Hayek is from the other side of the country... ever heard of Veracruz? The mexican gulf? Probably not but i live there.
    • harpwn, on 10/11/2007, -2/+2...

      Hollywood is not in western Arizona.
  • helinism, on 10/11/2007, -9/+33I think the older version with lots more dragons and Europe as a theme park was better.
  • ch0rn33, on 10/11/2007, -23/+74This picture was Funny in 1997
  • TiKoZ, on 10/11/2007, -28/+8Comic sans...
    • Makubex, on 10/11/2007, -13/+84The font of awesome.
    • xXShadowstormXx, on 10/11/2007, -14/+5Verdana or Tahoma > Comic Sans.

      Personally I can't stand that font. It's cheesy looking.
    • zolaar, on 10/11/2007, -2/+8I enjoy it the most when real, actual, licensed businesses use Comic Sans as the font for their corporate logo. There's a house painter in the area around here who has his van all done up in Comic Sans wonderment, looks more like a shuttle to the freaking daycare center....

      Yep, if there's one way for your business to say "We're not a creative group, but at least we make up for it by being cheapskate douchebags!", it's using Comic Sans.

      Science help us if they ever find a way to paint a tag onto a sign...
    • nights0223, on 10/11/2007, -1/+2bancomicsans.com
    • tech42er, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2It works for the picture. It's a casual font that helps with the perception as Americans as stereotypically gullible and nationalist.
  • ripstuntz, on 10/11/2007, -12/+1Sounds good to me!
  • Cobainy, on 10/11/2007, -8/+74So the USA never bombed Germany?

    New to me...
    • djjuice, on 10/11/2007, -14/+7it missed japan also
    • KapitalK, on 10/11/2007, -9/+4And didnt America bomb Japan? Or i guess they just decided the name calling pushed them into surrendering.
    • Markpdotcom, on 10/11/2007, -6/+6haha boys, I don't think this is an accurate depiction of ALL the places America has bombed ever...

      Take it for what it is, a joke.
    • therightside, on 10/11/2007, -11/+7Wait didnt Japan bomb America first and thats why we got into the war?

      Oh wait this is digg America is the enemy.
    • CeeJayDK, on 10/11/2007, -1/+1That's not all .. They forgot parts of the USA ( Parts that aren't pointed out on the map )
    • xtraa, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2@cobainy

      Nope. It wasn't the USA.

      It was the USA, plus the Brits, plus some Australians, plus Russia, some french partisans and I dunno who else.

      So it was prolly 6 on 1. Pretty tough germans ;p

      But btw I am very happy you won the war. :)
  • enalios, on 10/11/2007, -10/+67MORE DOTS!!
  • mage1129, on 10/11/2007, -16/+10I think that map gives us too much credit, I doubt half of America can identify all the countries that are labeled, let alone where they are on a map if they weren't labeled.
    • Slovenian6474, on 10/11/2007, -5/+51Hey, i knew damn well where Xena was even before seeing this map.
    • halavais, on 10/11/2007, -9/+3Yeah, and I bet most American's wouldn't draw the Osama arrow there.
    • jawbreaker4fs, on 10/11/2007, -1/+12As a New Zealander, I think the Xena label is hardly the most significant feature people associate with New Zealand.. it's more like "Hobbits" or "King Kong." Thanks a lot Peter Jackson.
  • jongos, on 10/11/2007, -12/+3There's tooooo much truth in jest.
  • NnyDarko, on 10/11/2007, -12/+16Moose FTW!
  • lukehh, on 10/11/2007, -8/+26Snow, Moose, Hockey. yup.
    • gordonm, on 10/11/2007, -3/+23And beer. Don't forget the beer, eh?
    • radix33, on 10/11/2007, -6/+2Nope, hockey has moved to California.

      DUCKS #1
  • Chewie67, on 10/11/2007, -9/+9Looks about right. What's the point?
  • ir1337, on 10/11/2007, -18/+3Buried for being about 5 years old. I've had this on my fridge since 2002.
    • Jwoey, on 10/11/2007, -7/+18I bet you heard of n'sync before they were cool, too.
    • GMorgan, on 10/11/2007, -4/+23N'Sync were cool? When did this happen!?!
    • qwertylicious, on 10/11/2007, -0/+3In what was known as the music "Dark Years".....

      *shudder*
  • BostonSpeakers, on 10/11/2007, -13/+13better: http://www.jigsawlounge.co.uk/kungfu/world/legend.html
    • BostonSpeakers, on 10/11/2007, -4/+5also shows how other maps evolved from his, including the one this story links to
    • Elranzer, on 10/11/2007, -4/+2Don't digg this one down. This is how the world would be DRAWN according to 'Mericans (if you were to ask one to draw it off the top of their heads).
    • TheGentleman, on 10/11/2007, -2/+4so true, so true, better than the one in the article.
    • sally00, on 10/11/2007, -1/+3THIS is the original one.

      ***** all those knock-offs.
  • madhighlandcow, on 10/11/2007, -15/+8Far more accurate.

    http://crazy.codetroop.com/randimg/?america.gif

    Moo.
  • Machismo, on 10/11/2007, -15/+13I thought this wasn't all that funny.
    I don't know anyone who sees the world this way. Even the listing of who is bad and good is so ***** off.
    Anyway, not too funny and has been done MUCH betetr by others.
  • JimSwarthow, on 10/11/2007, -12/+67yea this is so poignant cuz the rest of the world is populated by egalitarian, non-nationalistic, non-ignorant, peace-luving people who only want what's best for the World and not their particular corner of the globe. The US is sooo "the problem".

    /pfft
    • BrK1, on 10/11/2007, -2/+23Exactly. This map looks the same the world over, except the US is labeled "Endless $$$$ aid."
    • iaglu, on 10/11/2007, -9/+2No, your just a big part of the problem.
  • sefalese, on 10/11/2007, -23/+19stupid. and not funny.
    • iluvhatemail, on 10/11/2007, -10/+4at least the "world according to america" was creative. this was boring
    • Markpdotcom, on 10/11/2007, -7/+1I know you are, but what am I? ;)
  • richiestang78, on 10/11/2007, -10/+2Thats funny
  • MikeonTV, on 10/11/2007, -6/+4LOL at Xena
  • XBFNoodles, on 10/11/2007, -13/+24Yeah, I'm with JimSwarthow.

    My two year old cousin could make something funnier than this. It's not that it's offensive...it just sucks.

    Dugg down for being totally lame.
  • ApolloXLII, on 10/11/2007, -3/+1lots of celebrities go to die there... at least that's what that one new zealand website tells me.
  • akatherder, on 10/11/2007, -6/+4Buried as stolen. The sloppy paint version was the original. Taking the idea and changing everything around would be ok, but keeping "Here be dragons" is an obvious yoink.
  • ATH025, on 10/11/2007, -10/+5I bet most Americans wouldn't even know that much.
    • ApolloXLII, on 10/11/2007, -6/+5i was about to chew you out... but then i realized that you're pretty accurate. I'm a geography major in college and looking back at high school geography, it was pretty sad. yes, Connecticut is a state... and no, Disneyworld is not the capital of Florida.
  • slayersharpe, on 10/11/2007, -4/+31A friend arrow is pointing to France?! Don't make me laugh!
  • cabortero, on 10/11/2007, -14/+4We're ALL Americans from Alaska to Tierra del Fuego. This post must mean, United Staters?( new term I just invented)

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Americas
    • drlha, on 10/11/2007, -2/+10Yes, but a true "USA person" considers only themselves and other US citizens to be an American.
    • rmah, on 10/11/2007, -7/+3Which United States? There are more than one you insensitive clod!
    • Dakart, on 10/11/2007, -0/+7Don't forget Estados Unidos Mexicanos (United Mexican States - The official name of Mexico)... So you can't call us United Staters...

      Also, "America" is in the name of our country, unlike countries like Canada, Panama, Columbia, Brazil, El Salvador...

      So, I think it's safe to say that it's common knowledge that an American is someone from the USA.
  • 4ezlife, on 10/11/2007, -5/+0To be honest, not funny at all.
    What is freedom? Only to so-called Americans? Ridiculous!
  • Hetman, on 10/11/2007, -4/+2I disagree with the thing about the japanese. Im personally a bigger fan of japanese culture than I am most European countries.

  • ekso, on 10/11/2007, -7/+7Dude, this is way way old.
    • radix33, on 10/11/2007, -1/+3May be old (been on my cubicle wall since 2003), but still applicable.

      Although we could have "Curry" replaced with "American Jobs".
  • grhomepage, on 10/11/2007, -2/+0Can't forget about Xena, lol. If's funny, it really is one of the only things I know about new zeeland.
    • gozeera, on 10/11/2007, -1/+0Comin' again to save the motherfu**in day yea!!
    • tdogg241, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2It's not motherfuffin day. You people and your asterisks. Get it together.
  • fatkiduluv, on 10/11/2007, -6/+10Dugg as lame!
  • MadMastaZ, on 10/11/2007, -5/+1They left out one important note

    BEER
  • fani, on 10/11/2007, -6/+2Watch as most of digg diggs it like mindless drones.. Anything like this is instantly dugg even though its charm has worn off...
  • BrokenClock, on 10/11/2007, -9/+38"You know you're Digg when you see a bunch of anti-American stories and comments."
    • Stevethegreat, on 10/11/2007, -1/+3It may also mean that you are in a non-American site. It is shown as a common value to disapprove US if you live somewhere outside its boarders, I don't think you'll find many to disagree with it, except -of course- Israelis....
    • mrASSMAN, on 10/11/2007, -1/+2Except this IS an American site. Nice try though..
    • Mthrsuperior, on 10/11/2007, -4/+2Actually, you know you're on Digg when Americans are handed their Xenophobic asses and faced with discourse from the vast majority of the world who hold contrary views.
  • Error601, on 10/11/2007, -6/+6Yawn. Dug down for lameness.
  • Osceola, on 10/11/2007, -8/+6Because the Brits are so intelligent......

    http://iccheshireonline.icnetwork.co.uk/0100news/0100regionalnews/tm_headline=children-who-think-carrots-grow-on-trees&method=full&objectid=19266264&siteid=50020-name_page.html
    • GMorgan, on 10/11/2007, -4/+11Indeed but we laugh at our idiots rather than put them in power. Our leaders are insidious evil rather than comical evil.
    • Hetman, on 10/11/2007, -2/+4comical evil makes for good t.v. however. I love listening to bush talk. It is going to be sad when he is out of office and we dont get anymore bushisms.
    • Osceola, on 10/11/2007, -4/+9This coming from a country that empowers a queen and princes.
  • Xonay, on 10/11/2007, -10/+3That's why I don't like America(ns)... Now dugg me down... :P
  • Justinsb, on 10/11/2007, -5/+2It's a little misleading, I mean Americans know about coffee, drugs, diamonds, oil etc., but if told the country of origin I don't think they're as likely as this map indicates to know where that country is.
  • dwalls32, on 10/11/2007, -3/+11Sad that the majority of the world only knows about American from what they see in films made here by a minute segment of the population.

    Hell, just because every film about Germany shows people binge drinking at Oktoberfest doesn't mean that all American see Germany that way.
  • gert527, on 10/11/2007, -4/+4PRETTY FUNNY
  • evilregis, on 10/11/2007, -1/+18Osama is in Iraq. DUH. Buried as inaccurate.
  • FunkyNuts, on 10/11/2007, -3/+9Actually, Canada should be reflected as "America, Jr." ala Homer Simpson.
  • residentps2, on 10/11/2007, -6/+7More stupid political *****. Honestly, do we need poorly created Photoshops and bad stereotypes on the Front Page of Digg these days? "LOL AMERICANZ R DUM AM I RITE GUYZ?"
  • mythosmc, on 10/11/2007, -2/+3dumb.
  • smek2, on 10/11/2007, -3/+2@trer :"t's sad because it illustrates how the media has molded our minds into a more simplistic way of thinking while at the same time the mantra that we are "independent and free" is constantly drilled into our heads." — my thoughts exactly. Especially phrases like "the free, civilized world" or "leader of the free world" making my blood boil. That leads to guys like Giuliani who claim that, if the Democrats win, it'll be the downfall of all civilization. Because, you know, the terrorists will win then
  • AoSDFA, on 10/11/2007, -4/+4What's so offensive? That IS pretty much how Fox News presents the world.

    I'd replace "Tequila" with "Day Laborers," and maybe "Diamonds" with "AIDS." THEN it'd be offensive. And even closer to how Fox News presents the world.
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