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55 Comments
- Orbital101, on 11/10/2009, -3/+46Ok, even I know that's fake... and I fall for EVERYTHING.
- gankige, on 11/10/2009, -5/+46It's all good, I don't think this guy has any business reproducing anyway.
- DRT23, on 11/10/2009, -3/+30thechive?...is that a spinoff of theonion?
1. Post troll question on Y!
2. Wait for answers
3. F5
4. ??????
5. Profit! - skybark, on 11/10/2009, -0/+24And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell. Mark 9:47
So you should pluck out your eyes and castrate yourself. - chrisduser, on 11/10/2009, -4/+23"The best Christian is a sterile Christian."
-Anonymous - Puppytwo, on 11/10/2009, -0/+17I do the same thing except it just makes me harder
- Awwzm, on 11/10/2009, -5/+14When Carrie Prejean gets aroused, she gets out her video camera.
Still waiting for that link. - boshhead, on 11/10/2009, -3/+11No, he's not being a good Christian. It's his "glimpse" of a woman that is causing him to have lustful thoughts, which is a sin. And Jesus says that you should remove the offending part of your body, which would be your eyes:
Matthew 5:27-30 (King James Version)
27Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:
28But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
29And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
30And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. - asskicker32, on 11/10/2009, -1/+8thechive?
WTF?
lame.
edit: after reading it, buried as lame. Who diggs this *****? - eresig, on 11/10/2009, -0/+6This happened three weeks ago. i highly doubt this website did that. and based on their (massive) rank, I don't think they're hurting for traffic these days. they're one of the biggest boys out there now:
http://www.alexa.com/siteinfo/thechive.com - Snoogs, on 11/10/2009, -0/+6I'm convinced that other than high school math problems, Yahoo Answers is basically a troll-farm.
- valetudomexican, on 11/10/2009, -0/+5Onward Christian soldiers indeed.
- atchon, on 11/10/2009, -0/+5You got to love some of the extreme measures seen in the bible.....
- Snoogs, on 11/10/2009, -0/+5failTroll.
- kleash, on 11/10/2009, -0/+4Successful troll is successful.
- HMMcKamikaze, on 11/10/2009, -0/+4You must teach me the ways of the secular flesh.
- Tonelico, on 11/10/2009, -0/+4Comment dugg for one of the best Arrested Development quotes *ever*
- damnshoes, on 11/10/2009, -1/+4when I get aroused i masturbate.
- smickandily, on 11/10/2009, -0/+3this is the lamest comparison I've ever read. I'd like to tea bag you.
- Leezus, on 11/10/2009, -1/+4That made this submition worth it.
- jshhmr, on 11/10/2009, -0/+3When I get aroused, I just put a flash grenade down my pants.
- VikingBeatbox, on 11/10/2009, -0/+2Reminds me of my high school boyfriend...
- Hetman, on 11/10/2009, -0/+2Yes he is according to Jesus. Matthews
"If your hand or foot causes you to sin, cut it off and cast it from you. It is better for you to enter into life lame or maimed, rather than having two hands or two feet, to be cast into the everlasting fire.
"And if your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and cast it from you. It is better for you to enter into life with one eye, rather than having two eyes, to be cast into hell fire. - ocean17, on 11/10/2009, -0/+2"Odildo" - You better go & flagellate yourself for that one, or was that the idea?
- OptionalPirate, on 11/10/2009, -0/+2HURRHURR LET'S PUT SOME POLITICS IN HERE.
- Ch0riz0, on 11/10/2009, -0/+2Ya but it's funny and makes you lol.
People still use the internet to find "information"? - smickandily, on 11/10/2009, -0/+2for the best self abuse: youjizz.com
- Alli3388, on 11/10/2009, -1/+3Yahoo! Answers SUCKS!!!!! You try Googling just about anything these days, and all you get is page after page of ***** Yahoo! Answers links, and every single ***** answer is complete *****!!
- IphtashuFitz, on 11/10/2009, -0/+2Waitaminute... By your logic he should cut out his heart. After all, the passage you quoted says "hath committed adultery with her already IN HIS HEART", not in his eyes.
- AdamFromMyspace, on 11/10/2009, -2/+3Or you could take it metaphorically rather than literally.
Translation for the retarded: if something or someone around you makes you sin, it is best not to keep acquaintance/hold on to that thing.
That doesn't sound quite as extreme. - Bartboy919, on 11/10/2009, -1/+2WTF IS THE CHIVE!?
- FormerBabby, on 11/10/2009, -1/+2Laff?
- schmidt349, on 11/10/2009, -0/+1I would cut off the more disreputable parts of the body, and use the space for playing fields.
- smashTasker, on 11/10/2009, -1/+2Sterilizing all Christians sounds like a good idea.
- smickandily, on 11/10/2009, -0/+1a good christian is a sterile christian
- boogerthecat, on 11/10/2009, -2/+3I'd say if you are that damn dumb, it's probably a good thing.
- skybark, on 11/10/2009, -0/+1You guys the whole thing.
- strongsad, on 11/10/2009, -0/+1If you get hard by punching yourself in the junk, then I believe you are ready to level up.
You are now a Level 5 Masturbateur:
Skills gained:
- increase stamina +1
- increase damage resistance +1: ability to assault your meat with a garden hose and/or barbed wire.
The Level 1 noob in the article was trying to fist assault his meat too soon... when will they learn. - maize, on 11/10/2009, -1/+2@bossket, I'm not sure I agree with your assessment, especially calling him 'not a good Christian'. He is clearly trying to understand Gods teaching to the extent to post a question on Yahoo.
There is a difference between your body reacting naturally to a woman, and lust. Lust meaning seeing and imagining the opposite sex as more of a tool for sex, and less of a respected human being.
From the question, I don't see much signs of lust, as his body is just doing what is natural.
Btw, if you were being sarcastic or making a joke, my mistake. - maize, on 11/10/2009, -1/+2That verse is warning against lust, which goes beyond your normal, natural sex drive. It's saying that thoughts of overt lust, when uncontrollable, can lead to crime, or other.... weird acts. Basically guard against the beginning of something that can be potentially damaging to you, and others around you.
A natural sex drive, which the person who asked the question seems to be going through, is perfectly fine and normal. - jasvll, on 11/10/2009, -1/+2I don't remember Jesus having much to say on this particular subject.
- damphoud, on 11/10/2009, -0/+1I troll on R&A aaalllllllllll day - there are some religious nuts on there.
- sladek, on 11/10/2009, -2/+2I believe step 4 is submt it to Digg
- smickandily, on 11/10/2009, -0/+0Shouldn't he cut straight for the brain? A quick study could probably pinpoint which part of the brain is responsible for lust. Cast it away!
- xaogypsie, on 11/10/2009, -1/+1That's what she said.
BAM! - doyoumrjones, on 11/10/2009, -2/+2Meh.
- IHaveIssues, on 11/10/2009, -2/+2Step 2 is: answer with your other account.
- maize, on 11/10/2009, -2/+2Hahaha, I'm a Christian, and I laughed at this one, as there actually are many young Christian men who wonder about this issue..
Bottom line is, it's only natural for a man to take notice of an attractive woman, especially if you're at a beach. There is nothing wrong with admiring beauty, and our bodies reacting naturally, aka getting an erection. It's the way we were created, and it's called a sex drive.
The problem arises when admiring and appreciating the beauty of the opposite sex go beyond into lust, our minds using women(or men) as a mere tool to relieve ourselves, that Jesus was trying to prevent. - maize, on 11/10/2009, -1/+1I agree, jasvil, sometimes I wish he did. But then again, maybe he did say much about this topic, it just wasn't written down or remembered.
But I can see why the particular verse about lust and cutting out eyes and limbs was easy to remember :). - chuckDontSurf, on 11/10/2009, -2/+2Lame.
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