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- notmark, on 10/12/2007, -3/+131Everyone talks about "the lady that spilled coffee on her lap and sued McDonalds for 3 million" without knowing the facts. She had to get skin grafts, and she had 3rd degree burns on 6% of her body. The coffee was 190 degrees F. She asked for medical costs of $12,000, but McD's only offered $600. The jury gave her 20% of the fault, but because McDonald's acted like a-holes, they gave her $2.7 million in punitive damages. The case was ultimately settled on appeal for less than $600,000.
I stole the info from Wikipedia:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liebeck_v._McDonald%27s_Restaurants - berwiki, on 10/12/2007, -8/+72ugh, i hate the 'cute' comments after Every Single warning.
- haveacigar, on 10/12/2007, -1/+58Chainsaw: "Do not stop with your hands or genitals"
I think thats something we can all relate to... - MikeyisaFag, on 10/12/2007, -1/+41Worst clipart ever.
- knightblade2oo4, on 10/12/2007, -5/+38I do love Comic Sans :/
- quoquo, on 10/12/2007, -3/+31pictures? it's a comic sans list with cliparts, come on!
- Klarth, on 10/12/2007, -1/+28Peanuts are not nuts. They are legumes.
- WaterDragon, on 10/12/2007, -0/+26When my company bought a new, super powerful Shop-Vac, it had this notice packed with it:
Warning: Do Not Insert Penis. - 2Fingers1Love, on 10/12/2007, -34/+59Stupid people need stupid labels.
Remember the lady that spilled coffee on her lap and sued McDonalds for 3 million?
These labels are just to cover their asses from stupid people and liberal juries. - rprouse, on 10/12/2007, -1/+26"No purchase necessary means you don't need to provide proof of purchase if you win the contest."
Actually, no that is not what it means. Many States and Provinces make it illegal for companies to require payment (purchase) to enter a contest giveaway, so companies MUST provide a free way to enter the contest. Of course they make that very hard to do such as one entry per first class mail or you have to send away for the contest pieces.
I believe that the reason for the no purchase necessary is because if a payment is required, it would then be classed as a lottery or gambling, not a free-giveaway. Lotteries/gambling are strictly regulated in most places, but free-giveaways are not, thus the loophole. Anyone know more?
Sorry ;-) - thebeaz, on 10/12/2007, -1/+19You can almost picture some idiot saying "Eh? Wink wink, nudge nudge!" after each one. I get e-mailed crap like this all the time...
- ij00mini, on 10/12/2007, -1/+19The best line had to be "A lot of weird ***** happens in Sweden" in response to that.
- nzknzknzk, on 10/12/2007, -5/+23Okay, the responses are NOT funny. Leave it to our imagination.
- joeshlub, on 10/12/2007, -7/+25Are those all real? Half the pictures were clip art, I didn't see any actual labels. I don't doubt most of them, but titling this with (PICTURES) is kinda deceptive.
All told, lame post. - Klarth, on 10/12/2007, -0/+17PEANUTS ARE NOT NUTS.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peanut
http://www.peanut-shellers.org/index_files/Legume.htm
http://www.clarkswcd.org/VirtualAg06/Peanuts.htm
Christ on a bike. - anagoge, on 10/12/2007, -0/+15...so you took it back and asked for a different one.
- TheBritishGuy1, on 10/12/2007, -5/+20This would be much funnier without the person's commentary...
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+15My all-time favorite was a bank in Italy that had all the international standard "NO" signs. You know, like the no smoking one, no dogs, etc. One of the signs was "no robbing the bank". It was a picture of a guy, dressed like the stereotypical hamburglar style criminal, holding a gun to the teller, with the big red no sign over it.
Do you really need a cartoon sign telling you not to rob banks? - zlintux, on 10/12/2007, -8/+22The cough syrup and sleeping aid may have the warning required by local laws, and either way, is never a bad idea.
The Christmas lights state it so as to specify they are both. There are indoor only ones, and ones that are intended for outdoor use. Specifying they are for both is help to many customers.
Peanuts do not normally contain nuts, so the warning may be just.
And tellings kids that a superman costume won't make them fly isn't a bad idea. Kids are impressionable, and all the reinforcement not to do something stupid is worthwhile.
The range stove/oven is also a valid label -- short kids will often open something such as a drawer or oven to stand on to reach things. This makes it more clear to an adult to make it ever so much more clear to ensure the kid doesn't use the oven for this purpose.
The plastic container is the same. It makes it clear that an adult should not allow kids to play with the container, as using it as a hiding place or similar could result in suffocation.
And the vending machine -- people often will rock or tilt it, especially if something they want gets stuck. Putting it on the label just saves their ass when you end up paralyzing yourself in pursuit of that bag of chips.
The rest are, however, quite obvious, bad translations or simply outlandish. - JackyTreehorn, on 10/12/2007, -1/+14"I do love Comic Sans"
There needs to be a Firefox extension that turns Comic Sans Serif text into Times New Roman, or Arial, or Goatse links. - genforklift, on 10/12/2007, -0/+11Ugh, there needs to be warning labels for sites that were made in 1995.
- SkittlesUSA, on 10/12/2007, -0/+11Did you know on a tube of Preparation H it says "Do not take this orally." That's sad isn't it? Cause you know somebody wrote them a letter.
Dear Preparation H,
I ate this WHOLE dang tube, and I still got these hemorrhoids. - digitalsatori, on 10/12/2007, -0/+8I would *love* to see a picture of that one!
- getoffmylawn, on 10/12/2007, -0/+8"Do not iron clothes on body." -- I had an aunt that worked in the ER for many years. She told me that lots of people came into the emergency room due to burns from people ironing their clothes while wearing them.
- Fhwqhgads, on 10/12/2007, -2/+10No surprise there. The human race never ceases to amaze me.
- Icklehamsta, on 10/12/2007, -0/+7"BTW...when I asked a friend from Brazil what they call Brazil nuts...he said "We just call them nuts"."
Yeah..funny. Right from the Simpsons. -.- - thecoolestcow, on 10/12/2007, -1/+8http://bancomicsans.com
- comradeTJH, on 10/12/2007, -1/+7(PICTURES)?
Well, more like Word clipart... - commiecat, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6Read what Klarth said. Peanuts are *NOT* nuts.
Don't you people watch Alton Brown?!
EDIT: doh, got this comment up pretty late. - generaljigger, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6I once looked at a claymore anti-personnel device, it said "this side toward enemy" on one side and "do not eat" on the other. I guess some people need to be told everything. :)
- SkittlesUSA, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6I like how Bill Engvall puts it-
I just hate stupid people. They should have to wear signs that say 'I'm Stupid.' That way you wouldn't rely on them would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. You would be like "Excuse me... oops never mind, I didn't see your sign." That's why there's warnings on products. If people were wearing those signs you just wouldn't sell them the product would you? I'm sorry..... I can't sell you that. - t1t0, on 10/12/2007, -2/+7According to this submitter, all articles submitted can now contain "(PICTURES)" in the title...
- jhshukla, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4I saw one in Braille. CAUTION: HOT SURFACE.
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4I think you're missing the point. Product was labeled as children's cough medicine. You generally don't want them driving or operating heavy machinery as it is, much less when they're hallucinating.
- Klarth, on 10/12/2007, -3/+6PICTURES!
...Of generic objects which the fictitious warnings pertain to! This is amazingly lame. - ICSU, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flaming_Moe
- Vic333, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4The scary thing is, is that there is a reason for every one of those warning labels.
- deimios, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3I don't think this is the actual story behind why that warning label exists (if it is actually for real), but it's still humorous:
http://everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=691158 - Nougat, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4Scroll down, there are a few pictures at the bottom.
- Lionhart, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3The reason it says may contain nuts is because they are processed on machinery that also processes nuts. And no, peanuts are not nuts, they are legumes. My mother is deathly allergic to nuts but has no problem eating peanuts.
- orientis, on 10/12/2007, -2/+5Thanks, very informative. I'll note this down for future reference.
- doubleyoube, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2It was the bit about the soil that made me laugh.
Incidentally, why is my post getting dug down? I'll never understand some people and how they think.. They'll dig up someone who says "will it blend" but make a genuine coment and your in the negative within seconds :S... - WaterDragon, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Allegedly, if you unroll a tube or (American) fluoridated toothpaste all the way, opening up the crimp on the bottom, it has a hidden warning label:
Caution: do not eat contents.
These were added because the amount of fluoride in a family size tube is sufficient to kill a small child (up to about 40lbs.), if they ate it.
Since fluorides are in fact a deadly poison for humans, the manufacturers added this label so they can't get sued. - WaterDragon, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2This is because parsley has, particularly in the roots, chemicals that can be quite toxic. Incidentally, the leaves of rhubarb (aka strawberry- rhubarb because of its red color) are said to be poisonous, as are the leaves of tomato plants.
And the leaves of the common ornamental plant Coleus, if eaten in large quantities, are said to be mildly psychedelic...but they taste horribly bitter, so nobody uses them that way.
Warning: Do not eat your mom's house plants!
- licoricewhip, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2They need instruction on "regular" soap, too, by the way.
- Moria, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2"On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor and outdoor use."
(And where else might we be stringing lights. Not tonight, honey I have a headache.)"
So how is that stupid? I would be incredibly annoyed if my Christmas lights didn't say where I could use them. I want to know if they're waterproof etc. - Nougat, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2The oven one - kids will do things you can't imagine, including standing on anything and everything. That is a valid warning.
- AeonTorpor, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1And then someone named Bill Engvall wrote you and said "Stop ripping off my ***** without giving me credit"
- xvertigox, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2The cough syrup one makes sense. The main ingredient would be Dextromethorphan Hydrobromide. It's powerful hallucinogenic dissociative . http://www.erowid.org/chemicals/dxm/dxm.shtml http://dextroverse.org/
- ddarting, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1A suit case we purchased once admonished us that it was not approved for "shark attack and children under 5." Must have been quite a story.
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