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87 Comments
- emecks, on 11/17/2008, -0/+60Mountie Chief: "Have you ever ridden a horse?"
Candidate: "Erm how do you mean that exactly?" - lolipop99, on 11/17/2008, -0/+33Worse thing I did while drunk...hmmm!....Well there is that one time I tried to kill myself while making love to my dog, but now I want to be RCMP!
- RealmDown, on 11/17/2008, -0/+29Are you a Mounter or a Mountie ?
- JoeRandom, on 11/17/2008, -3/+29Polygraphs have no basis in reality. They are completely fallible and a joke. Groups like the CIA use them for interviews, only to hire people, and then tell them how to pass the polygraph. That should tell you something.
Say no to the use of polygraphs in any legal setting
http://antipolygraph.org/
Also isn't prostitution legal in Canada? So what if someone uses a legal service alot? What is with the victorian era values? - digg-dugg, on 11/17/2008, -0/+19Actually we're having a serious cop shortage up here. Supposedly they're having a hard time finding canadians that can actually pass this test.
- slogged, on 11/18/2008, -3/+17Well no, most Canadians can pass the test. It primarily asks ethical questions related to drug use, prostitution, and bestiality.
What they have is a shortage of applicants, because nobody wants to work in rural areas of Canada--mostly native reserves--where most new recruits are sent. - Applex, on 11/17/2008, -0/+13They get undercover operatives you wouldn't have met to bring up these type of questions too outside work
- Autodidaddict, on 11/17/2008, -0/+12Any polygraph test has absurd, obvious, or other "baseline" questions used to compare the readings compared to other questions. The RCMP doesn't actually have a problem with bestiality.
But my question is, wouldn't a lot of people fail this because upon hearing the question, they became nervous at the prospect of the results implying they were lying about it?
Polygraphs are a joke. - einrobstein, on 11/17/2008, -0/+11We've got a lot of moose, deer and beavers and a lot of cold lonely winter nights. You do the math.
- inactive, on 11/18/2008, -0/+11I'm fine just as long as they don't ask me if I like choking myself while hitting my penis with a ball peen hammer while watching the Teletubbies.
- DivisibleByZero, on 11/18/2008, -0/+11Almost worked for the NSA right out of college. Had a plane flight that ended up with an all-too-perfect girl sitting next to me flirting the whole time, asking all sorts of questions about the job and who my favorite Star Trek characters were. No way she was real.
- slogged, on 11/18/2008, -1/+12No, prostitution is not legal in Canada. It's not tolerated either, there are frequent undercover operations done in my city. The johns are targeted by law enforcement, the prostitutes are targeted by concerned groups and shelters for rehabilitation and counseling.
- sgiffy, on 11/17/2008, -0/+9I can see the suicide one, though a psych eval seems more appropriate, but is bestiality really a big enough problem in Canada that's its an interview question?
- craighoxton, on 11/17/2008, -0/+9...is the most often-asked question on Toronto's Church Street
- asnider, on 11/18/2008, -0/+9"Do you associate with anyone who uses illegal drugs?"
Seriously? How many Canadians are going to be able to answer this honestly? Who doesn't know at least one person who smokes pot (assuming you don't smoke it yourself)? - megagram, on 11/18/2008, -0/+9Yup. Utterly ridiculous.
A guy I know was applying for the RCMP--something he's wanted for many years. During his polygraph they asked if he'd every looked at underage porn. He came up with an answer along the lines of, "I've never looked for it consciously but can't say for sure that everything I've ever seen has been over 18--I definitely avoid anything obviously underage". You know, pretty much like any normal dude who's looked at porn online.
Well yeah, that was the end of his interview and his application and his chances of EVER applying to be a police officer ever again.
And, to think of some of the douche bags they DO hire. Makes me ***** sick. - Hardrockshero, on 11/18/2008, -0/+7You too???
- CJWilson, on 11/18/2008, -0/+7Prostitution itself is legal in Canada but communicating for the purposes of prostitution is illegal. Which Basically means solicitation... so the prostitute can't be selling herself on street corners.
- gpw11, on 11/18/2008, -2/+9"Who ran over an indian and killed him: a mountie."
To be fair, haven't we all done this? I mean those ***** pass out anywhere. - dbarefoot, on 11/18/2008, -0/+6Wow, the RCMP has a "Truth Verification Section"? That sounds terrifyingly Orwellian.
- megagram, on 11/18/2008, -0/+5I totally agree with you. Although at the same time I can see myself in his shoes, panicking, and thinking "How honest do I have to be, hooked up to this BS machine?? Do I risk getting caught 'lying' to a police officer or do I risk looking like a pedophile, what's worse?"
- asnider, on 11/18/2008, -0/+5Not saying that's right or wrong, but he probably should have just said, "No." If he hasn't knowingly looked at underage porn, I'm pretty sure he'd have passed the polygraph by simply saying, "No."
- barc0001, on 11/18/2008, -1/+6Oh please. I'd take having to deal with the RCMP over something every day for 2 years to dealing with something for one day with most US law enforcement departments.
The guys who killed a guy with a taser: Practically every law enforcement department in the world by now, so how is this a differentiator? Or do you mean the Polish immigrant at the airport in Vancouver? Because that was VPD, not the RCMP. And one of those VPD guys involved with that tasering just got busted for a DUI....
Who gave up a Canadian to the US to get killed in death row: So the mounties are allowed to choose who gets extradited and who doesn't? Was the guy guilty? If he was, sucks to be him, but you really shouldn't be running around committing a captial crime in a country where they'll put you to death for it. Just like you shouldn't bawl to me when you try smuggling some drugs into Singapore or China and are surprised by the "vigorous" actions taken by those countries. - inactive, on 11/18/2008, -0/+51. Do a bunch of coke
2. Take polygraph and give "right" answer to all questions
3. Hideously fail on all questions.
4. Take pictures of mortified look on test givers face. - lemur, on 11/18/2008, -0/+4< 3 Canada
- DivisibleByZero, on 11/18/2008, -0/+4Happened to me. Had to give some fairly incriminating details and they kept accusing me of lying. Don't know whether the stress was causing false positives or if they were just bluffing to see if I'd talk more
- UberNick, on 11/18/2008, -0/+4The NSA and FBI ask the same kind of questions. The trick is that if you tell the truth on everything and admit really embarrassing *****, almost regardless of how bad it is.
What they're trying to do is not assess your moral fortitude, but simply weed out the dishonest. If the polygraph giver thinks you're holding back, he'll ask progressively worse questions. If you admit to things like drug use and lewd sex acts, they'll tell you it's no biggie, that everyone has skeletons, and it's better that you're open with them.
The thing that will really get you excluded is bad financial history or extreme sensitivity to embarrassment-- basically anything that others can use to extort you into turning against your employer. - SilverBack101, on 11/18/2008, -0/+3O_o Dude...
- DivisibleByZero, on 11/18/2008, -0/+3Legal doesn't necessarily mean healthy, which is probably what they're concerned about. They also want to make sure you're not cheating on your wife with a prostitute. The last thing they need is somebody blackmailing you.
- inactive, on 11/18/2008, -1/+4Sorry pal. Too much pot in your system... next!
- einrobstein, on 11/18/2008, -0/+3Reminds me of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_2KUXDACoU
(not rick roll, I swear) - Fjosnisse, on 11/18/2008, -1/+4I have no idea why they are doing this. RCMP is losing candidates to the CBSA and CSIS. Doesn't make sense. In my opinion, its just plain stupid to do this.
Associate with anyone using illicit drugs? "So I hung out with a guy 10 years ago in highschool that smoked dope.... now what?"
RCMP is total fail. - hillkiwi, on 11/18/2008, -0/+3"The machine isn't the lie detector, I am."
- mpichette, on 11/18/2008, -0/+3Unfortunately the undercover mounties are easily distinguished by their standard issue mustache. It's given along with the badge, gun, and red suit at the graduation ceremony.
- seanovan, on 11/18/2008, -0/+3"Are you applying to join the Mounties because you want power over other people?"
That should be on there.
Law enforcement officers are like regular people, some are cool and others are ***** pricks. - gannondork, on 11/18/2008, -1/+4i'm just glad we don't put lipstick on pitbulls up here or else I'd be in deep trouble. (and by trouble I mean I would ***** a dog)
- grantmoore3d, on 11/18/2008, -0/+3Those are simply for ceremony. When on duty, they are dressed similar to a police officer.
- TPorter72, on 11/18/2008, -1/+4so if I date rape a prostitute then leave her money, I have done nothing wrong?
- synth3tik, on 11/18/2008, -0/+3sounds a lot like the questions I got at customs when coming home from Toronto..
- greenfyre, on 11/17/2008, -1/+4Not really legal if you're talking about sex, although not particularly enforced.
If you mean selling your integrity, honesty, and morals to corporate lobbyists then it's the same answer so I don't know why I differentiated. - DaftMonk, on 11/18/2008, -0/+2Dugg for simplicity-to-humor ratio. In other words, "I lol'd."
- ldner77, on 11/18/2008, -0/+2In the town of tsawwassen near Vancouver BC an offduty mountie was drunk driving with his two young kids in the vehicle when he struck and killed an innocent motorcyclist.
And would you like to know what? It's the same mountie who was present at the fatal tasering in YVR not too long ago
http://www.bclocalnews.com/richmond_southdelta/sou ...
Justice? Welcome to the ***** RCMP - Barackalypse, on 11/18/2008, -0/+2That's horrible they ask that, I'm much rather have drugged up suicidal cops that like raping animals out on the streets with firearms keeping me safe than screen these people out of serving the public.
- fsuarez2005, on 11/18/2008, -0/+2moose stuff
- TheMoniker, on 11/18/2008, -0/+2After the polygraph test, the potential applicants will be subjected to an astrological background analysis, will have their palm read and undergo a rigorous round of tarot. Once finished with these objective, scientific tests, the subject will then need to prove via trial by ordeal and speaking in tongues that he/she are the right person for the job/not a witch.
- pradaaddict, on 11/18/2008, -0/+2why the hell were you talking about Star Trek with an impossibly hot girl flirting with you on a plane? WHY?!
- grantmoore3d, on 11/18/2008, -0/+2They are simply playing on the ignorance of most people by just using the device as a means to scare the applicants into telling the truth where they may not normally have done so.
- hillkiwi, on 11/18/2008, -0/+2Please close your account on digg.
- Rikushix, on 11/18/2008, -1/+3You know what? A big ***** You to you, sir. I have no idea if you're a Canadian citizen or not but I AM. What's more, I'm from Vancouver, and I've had enough of this absolute crap that people spew when the media decides the feed the populace's anti-authoritarian, groupthink conscious. You know, Consumerist style.
I am not in favor of defending the RCMP (or any officials of the law, for that matter) blindly; there have been one or two scandals of late that have truly tarnished their reputation, and rightly so. But hearing the same absolute ***** from people about how unreliable and "worthless" they are...christ. And Robert Polanski's case is the absolute tipping point. Don't get me wrong. It was an absolute tragedy, what happened to him (don't get me started on tasers). And yet if I hear one more uniformed, dumbass redneck comment from some idiot writing into the Vancouver Sun about how the RCMP is disgraceful and all those involved should be shot...I'm going to ***** snap. I swear.
Have some goddamn respect for the men and women that keep you safe at night. That is, assuming you're Canadian. If you aren't then you would have no truly knowledgeable basis for opinion anyway.
Tool. - asgardshill, on 11/18/2008, -1/+3Top Ten Reasons I Would Make A Terrible Mountie:
10. No cleft chin.
9. Girls with braided hair who are complete ditzes are a total turnoff.
8. Can't stand horses that are way smarter than me.
7. I'm glacially slow at untying people from railroad tracks.
6. I actually have a decent singing voice.
5. I like meaningful complicated names for horses.
4. I look great in a black cape and stovepipe hat.
3. I actually do want to be the ringleader of an evil cabal.
2. I would never have an in-law who worked in the same profession I do.
And the Number One Reason I Would Make A Terrible Mountie:
1. I could never live down the crappy live-action remake. -
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