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202 Comments
- wildfire, on 10/11/2007, -7/+333Step 1: Don't stare at *****.
- BritishGolgo13, on 10/11/2007, -5/+156Dugg for title not saying, "How to Hack Your Social Life".
- neocognitism, on 10/11/2007, -3/+136Always begin and end every social encounter with about a 10 second high-pitched heavy metal wail, accompanied by air guitar.
Chicks dig that. - Philluminati, on 10/11/2007, -2/+101A great article but easier said than done! I have no interest in music or fashion and I can never see anything I might have in common with other people. In fact, my interests are so few, I'm worried that I might be coming quite 1-dimensional. Got to get out...got to get out...close the browser Phill....close the ***** browser....get out!!!
- UrinalPooper, on 10/11/2007, -2/+97You still won't be able to launch a successful land war against russia during the winter.
- TRScheel, on 10/11/2007, -0/+88I like how this guy does it:
http://bash.org/?520670 - satx, on 10/11/2007, -2/+86Sometimes I wish I smoked just so I'd have an excuse to go up to people and "borrow lighter"/initiate conversation. Then I remember that I can't stand being around smokers.
- magamiako, on 10/11/2007, -11/+82I'm not a fan of this article. Most of what is said on here are ambiguous terms that people that "need" this don't quite understand.
Here are a few examples:
"don’t be a creepy" - What exactly is this supposed to mean? Do you not ask about their children? What's creepy to some is not creepy to others and so forth. In fact, the odd questions that normally don't get asked are the ones that often times spark my interest moreso than others. To me, if someone were to ask me something that isn't immediately noticeable, and it just so happens I could go off on a rant about it--I will. In fact, I'd probably go off more on a rant about that than if someone asked me something simple such as "Do you have a light?"
2. Be yourself. - I hear this over and over and over, and yet over again. What exactly is "being yourself"? This again means something different to a lot of people. Being me, I'm the type of guy who normally isn't open to conversation. At the same time, I don't care very much for sports nor anything like that. But I could go on a huge rant about video games, video game balance, stock markets, computers, and any other sort of topics that interest me. I don't drink, I have no clue of any of the artists of music that I listen to. I could go on a rant about specific artists and music talent but it's usually on a significantly higher level than "their music sounds good!" But if someone were to ask me "Name that band!" I could only tell you something like Metallica or Eminem or something recognizeable. All of this sort of stuff adds up to me being a rather "unapproachable" person--but not entirely because I'm not one for conversation, but because my interests lie in a different paradigm than most of the world.
Not too many people are truly "themselves" when they talk to you. Which is one of the observations of social interaction that I've made while working in a corporate office. People are very rarely themselves. Being yourself in actuality for most people is a very selfish, very non-caring endeavour. But people put on these shows as if they're interested in what you're talking about. They could truly care less. If you have this awesome, bright idea for how something new could be done in the office, they might listen passively but in the back of their minds they're saying to themselves "Why is this person talking to me? Why does it matter?" etc etc. and so forth.
The simple fact of the matter is--all of this is subjective. You can live a very happy, liveable, involved life while being mildly "anti-social", but it's not a life for everyone. There is a lot of stuff to do in this world and there are a lot of sights to see. Most people don't want to live in nor enjoy the freedom they have. Why do you need someone else to enjoy your time? If you want to see that movie, it's not "weird" to go see it alone. If you want to go out to eat, go out to eat. If you want to go hiking up a mountain by all means go for it!
People are too involved in whether or not that they are socially accepted by others that cause problems for when a majority of people can't be or just simply don't find themselves in situations to be. I, for example, got along great in a college project setting. Having flown to Florida to visit a friend and assist in her senior design project for Engineering, I found myself quickly involved and meeting some new people. This is of course a setting I can meet others and become friends. The reality of the situation is that back at home, I don't have that luxury. Having come from a family of workers, it's nearly impossible to say I can't/won't work for the sake of going to school. So my situation puts me in a different setting where I don't necessarily have the options.
And that's fine! Because I'm happy with myself and can do things myself if needed.
This website only goes to further the depression of people who feel like there is something "wrong" with them because they aren't meeting other people or they feel as if they're not as "social" as others.
The reality is that you're probably fine, and you should be happy with that. - mightyzug, on 10/11/2007, -5/+65stare at the *****... it's ok, as long as you begin the conversation with an indignant 'please stop staring at my eyes with your breasts' it'll be just fine... .try it :P
- Thex1138, on 10/11/2007, -2/+53It's a bit like trying to defy gravity...keeping your eyes forward can be tough some times...
- bakkouz, on 10/11/2007, -16/+65Step 1: try to spend more time off of DIGG and in REAL LIFE!
- NerdyNinja, on 10/11/2007, -0/+45"Uggh Errrg Glaaaaaggghhh" is so 6 billion years ago
- insanebrain, on 10/11/2007, -5/+47"Wanna ***** ?"
- mrASSMAN, on 10/11/2007, -2/+43Yeah you know you've been isolated from society for too long when you start talking to yourself publicly in text form..
- Seph7, on 10/11/2007, -4/+41Just be a man and get drunk
- aphexcoil, on 10/11/2007, -8/+45What is the purpose of this article? Approaching women? Here are the only tips you need:
1) Lie. That's right. Don't worry about being yourself because you're probably just another dull, boring, HTML editing, WOW playing, Digg Posting anti-social nerd. Instead, tell her things she wants to hear but don't be too specific. Mention that you need to check on your imported car to make sure the meter is fed. Tell her how fast you've driven it (this shows you're wild). Find something nice to say about her and turn it into an upside-down compliment, "Nice hair, is it real?"
2) Be a jerk. Talk to her and get her to laugh. Then leave and talk to another girl and watch as she stalks you all night to figure out "what your deal is."
3) Don't ever buy them a drink. Make them buy you a drink. Be a lovable ***** -- "If you buy ME a beer, I'll let you kiss me." - mrgq, on 10/11/2007, -4/+39I like the part about how to exit a conversation.
- Psalms, on 10/11/2007, -1/+35Starting a Conversation: For the Internet Nerd
-Tip One:During the conversation, try very hard not to ask what level Mage she is. That's not a wizard outfit, that's her coat.
-Tip Two:Do not mention you are currently living off a steady supply of Ramen noodles in your mother's house.
More to come, but I think if you get that far and you are currently subscribing to more than one MMORPG, then I need to go to confession, because the apocalypse is nigh. - TRScheel, on 10/11/2007, -0/+34Some MMORPG everyone's in. I hear you cant win, and that the system specs are so low anyone can play.
- mofochief, on 10/11/2007, -2/+35"Hello World" is so 1974.
- InfamousX241, on 10/11/2007, -5/+38"Hi" is so 2003.
- Jorlwind, on 10/11/2007, -7/+39Hey, you can mock this is you like, but one of the biggest lessons I've ever learned is that people themselves are the greatest resource in the world. Have the right people, and there will be almost nothing you can't do.
- ohcoaster, on 10/11/2007, -1/+31Don't stare at ***** if she's not showing them off. If she's got cleavage or something, it's fair game. They know that. Just don't talk about them. You can however compliment her ass and they'll love it!
- daridave, on 10/11/2007, -2/+27What pisses me off is that [some] girls do EVERYTHING possible to make you stare at them.
anyway... girls+turtlenecks = sexyness. wish more would know. - Wootery, on 10/11/2007, -1/+25Slow down there bakk - what exactly is this "REAL LIFE"?
- Loto, on 10/11/2007, -1/+23The thing that helped me a lot was realizing that no matter how dumb (but yet nice) the person you are talking to is, chances are that they are in some way interesting. They may have traveled to a country you want to visit, have a sibling in the same field or playing the same sport, have grown up in the same area, etc... The key is to find out what intrests you about them, and ask them about it. They enjoy talking about themselves, you seem like a great listener and good conversationalists, and best of all you aren't bored to tears. Once I figured this out, I had no problem meeting new people and chatting with them.
- wiirdo, on 10/11/2007, -1/+21My wife caught me looking once. I asked my wife to tell the woman to stop pointing her boobs at my eyes. Needless to say, my wife didn't buy it.
- MarkOfTheDead, on 10/11/2007, -2/+21vodka. the no-tell beverage.
- LucasKane, on 10/11/2007, -1/+18I like how he says small talk sucks then goes right to small talk in the next step "what are you drinking, etc"
- rarson, on 10/11/2007, -0/+17I love the way digg comedians take a joke as far as possible.
- Al3x, on 10/11/2007, -1/+17I carry a lighter for just this reason. I do not smoke though.
- KMye, on 10/11/2007, -2/+17If you're trying to juggle things around in your head you had to learn from this article while talking to someone, you're going to be too preoccupied to make any natural conversation.
- Sharky35, on 10/11/2007, -1/+16Most diggers prolly need this.
And the follow-up should be: "How to get a date". - qwerty1263, on 10/11/2007, -4/+19In order for my kids not to have this problem I actually made them enroll in speech classes @ school. Public speaking is something you have to overcome early in life. I had them enroll for a number of reasons because I believe if your shy you'll have problems in many aspects of your life not just socially including interviews, business etc.
- Kahnza, on 10/11/2007, -3/+17What about people with severe social anxiety?
- simpleid, on 10/11/2007, -1/+15I agree! (very agree)
- JohnboiWaltune, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1499% of people you meet are useless ***** who aren't capable of saying a single thing you can truly care about.
The art of conversation is being able to hide this fact. - violentvinyl, on 10/11/2007, -0/+13ASL?
- rarson, on 10/11/2007, -2/+15See, my whole problem is that I have no interest in talking to people I don't know... at least not in person.
I am pretty anti-social though. People piss me off. - spudnic, on 10/11/2007, -0/+12I used to be really shy, one the best ways to get me out of it was to start making small talk with people I don't know, people next to me in queues, cashiers, that sort of thing. It really helps boost your confidence and if you make a fool of yourself it doesn't matter.
- ColonelJessup, on 10/11/2007, -1/+13And I digg you down for using your instead of you're.
- Zyphron, on 10/11/2007, -1/+13I think you overstate what is necessary.
1) Dont lie. Be yourself, just be the best version of yourself, and don't worry about making up stuff or joking around as long as you are obviously not serious. For example, when asked what my job is I generally tell people I am a rubber band salesman. If they really want to know, I will tell them I solve computer problems for a living (dont be too specific, just create an interesting description that highlights the good traits about what you do)
2) Dont be a Jerk...Just dont be a pushover. Show that you are a strong person who is capable of standing up to her. Treat her like she is your bratty little sister. Say no to her like only her father does (that is why she loves her father -- he says no)
3) I actually agree with the dont buy drinks thing...for the reasons stated from number 2. - apetrie, on 10/11/2007, -0/+12If you're out to attract shallow bitches that you have nothing in common with, follow aphexcoils advice.
I'd take an HTML editing, WOW play, Digg Posting (I'll leave out anti-social, though socially awkward is acceptable) nerd any day. (Yes I'm a girl) - BritishGolgo13, on 10/11/2007, -0/+12Long story short, I'm the shy/quiet guy. Meeting new people isn't something I excel at and usually takes me a while to warm up to them. As I've come to realize in my recent past, being the shy, quiet, nice guy gets you nowhere, and it's understandable to some extent. If I put it on the line and talk to someone and that person is shy or uninteresting because of it, I will not talk to that person again. Being shy or nice has never worked for me, always against, especially in the way of girls. I've been making solid attempts constantly at getting out of my "shell" and become more outgoing so-to-speak and I'm getting better. I haven't chosen to be shy, it's just the way I am (was) and it has made a good portion of my life less than enjoyable.
- orbitz, on 10/11/2007, -0/+11There's nothing wrong with being shy but giving kids ample opportunity to overcome it (if that's where they are headed) is a much better alternative. Shyness can cause problems in life, read up on social anxiety which overall gives off characteristics of being shy/introverted. These people aren't generally happy because they mold their life around their comfort zone rather than what they want.
- zatrix, on 10/11/2007, -1/+12For someone with kids, it seems you have yet to realize that there is nothing wrong with being shy. You speak of shyness as though it is something that controls the person, where as the person chooses to be shy. Shyness isn't a disease and despite what you may think it will not cause problems in someone's life. You should read up on what it means to be extro or introverted. I feel sorry for your kids, because they are being forced to do things that you feel would have helped you.
- Arbus, on 10/11/2007, -1/+11I hate the way you stopped it short :(
- Antibland, on 10/11/2007, -0/+10"Be yourself." What if my true self *is* arrogant and self-serving? I'm an entertaining bastard, but lack generic, "true-self" qualities. Maybe I need therapy--not an article on conversing.
- kgerm, on 10/11/2007, -0/+10So.... yeah,
Digg here often? - kaelyiesta, on 10/11/2007, -0/+10I think its even better that the picture right under the title shows a man and a dog. I couldn't stop laughing while imagining this guy trying to work up the nerve to talk to the dog.
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