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339 Comments
- HopeForTomorrow, on 04/22/2009, -7/+447 1.) Facebook is not another myspace.
2.) Don't install every ***** app there is
3.) Nobody on Facebook gives a ***** about your political stance. - deltron, on 04/22/2009, -0/+372How not to be hated on Facebook in my book: Don't send me 3,000 app invites.
- MScrip, on 04/22/2009, -3/+2805) Don't use picture of your kids as your profile picture.
I went to school with YOU... not your 2 year old. - Kojangie, on 04/22/2009, -3/+239From Facebook:
"Kimberly ******** is making a pro/con list between Law School and Grad School since I got into both & god knows I'll never be able to decide between the two... FML."
Deleted. - Ja50n, on 04/22/2009, -0/+194if i've learned anything from facebook, it's that people constantly lose their phones.
- kevinkace, on 04/22/2009, -1/+152Don't post 50 pics of your stupid face taken from your cellphone. Every day.
- sutterm, on 04/22/2009, -3/+143"Stephanie ******* is pissed that she's taking 12 hours over the summer instead of travelling."
I was a second away from replying, "you go to an elite private university that Daddy pays for, drive a BMW, and have never worked a day in your life. Do you expect pity over facebook or are just so self-absorbed that you think this will draw attention?"
Then I realized it's not worth my time. This ***** is all my news feed's full of.
I wonder if Facebook is fueling narcissism or just publicizing it better? - flaminglips, on 04/22/2009, -1/+1394) Stop putting FML after every status update.
- Kojangie, on 04/22/2009, -1/+1235) Don't "become a fan" on things that are essential, i.e.:
The Beach
4 friends are fans.
Become a Fan
Food
3 friends are fans.
Become a Fan
Living
6 friends are fans.
Become a Fan - obamabarack, on 04/22/2009, -12/+122FTA
1. Stop taking quizzes. Nobody cares what literary time period you are.
2. If you sync your Twitter account to Facebook so that you fill others' news feeds with a constant stream of mundane updates and references to people with little @ symbols before their names, be prepared for people to de-friend you. Maybe even in real life. (Read "25 More Things I Didn't Want to Learn About You On Facebook.")
3. Don't friend someone you don't actually know
4. If you must friend someone you don't know, include a message explaining why you are doing so. For example, "Hi, I'm your cousin's roommate!" would suffice.
5. Actually, no. Why would your cousin's roommate want to be your friend? That's still weird.
6. Don't invite people to events if they don't live in your city. I'm glad you still live in our old college town, but guess what? I don't. Even if I did, I still wouldn't waste my Friday night listening to you play music at that vegan coffee shop I frequented when I was 19 because I couldn't get into bars.
7. I'm sorry your grandfather died of emphysema, but I will not join your "cause."
8. Make sure all your photos are rotated in the proper direction. How will people know how fun your Fourth of July barbecue was if every picture looks like you fell over?
9. If you create a group called "Lost my cell phone; need your numbers!," I will join, but I won't give you my number.
10. Cryptic status updates about your mental state — "Rachel is trying so hard," "Rachel wishes things were different," "Rachel is starting her life over" — don't make you sound intriguing, just lonely and pathetic. - SpectreFire, on 04/22/2009, -3/+106Agree fully with #10.
If you have cryptic facebook messages. You're a douche. There's no away explanation to it. - Anand999, on 04/22/2009, -2/+1041. I say, install whatever you want on your page. It's your page after all. Just don't send me invitations for every single application you add.
2. I, like most of the working world, don't need any reminders when it's Friday. I will assume you're thinking "TGIF!" on Friday unless you say otherwise, so no need to say it.
3. If you update your status more than 2 or 3 times a day, I'm dropping you as a friend. If you're into keeping people updated minute by minute, check out Twitter. - jamspt, on 04/22/2009, -1/+102Time magazine is covering this now?
We must be running out of pop culture to sift through. - renemartini, on 04/22/2009, -2/+8110. Cryptic status updates about your mental state — "Rachel is trying so hard," "Rachel wishes things were different," "Rachel is starting her life over" — don't make you sound intriguing, just lonely and pathetic.
Fckn pisses me off when people do that... to me this is equivilant to ewhores-attention seeking people - inactive, on 04/21/2009, -5/+78If you are hated... then maybe they aren't your "friends"
- Zihuatanejo, on 04/22/2009, -1/+70Here is a list of my five favorite foods start with the letter Q:
Quiche
Quail
Quince
...uh?
No one gives a ***** about your five favorite things, *****. - inactive, on 04/22/2009, -1/+69Today I got dugg down on a social website for not knowing what fml stands for - FML
- zoodoo12, on 04/22/2009, -2/+68don't be a douche
- Konnnan, on 04/22/2009, -9/+66This author sounds like a douchebag.
- holyskeleton, on 04/22/2009, -0/+56I copy witty Digg comments into my status.
- inactive, on 04/22/2009, -1/+56Son of a bitch! I'll show him *grabs real can of spray paint*
- MarrowMan, on 04/22/2009, -0/+52lol "I just won $10,000,000, in the lottery, omg how do I spend it? I don't even know where to begin, FML!"
- Zihuatanejo, on 04/22/2009, -4/+53STOP BEING CRITICAL OF MY COMMENTS. IF YOU DON'T LIKE THEM DON'T READ THEM :((((((((
- shoematt, on 04/22/2009, -0/+49Passive aggressive narcissism
- SanjiWatsuki, on 04/22/2009, -0/+48You mean... all of those people I didn't know who asked to be my friend weren't really friends?
- alasdairmacl, on 04/22/2009, -2/+49damn i was so ready to trash this article, but when i actually read it I agreed with most of the points.
- judicar, on 04/22/2009, -1/+47I don't usually think of Time as a primary source on how to avoid social ettiquette when using emerging technologies.
Shouldn't they be working on this year's special full-color Kennedy family issue? - Appox, on 04/22/2009, -7/+536) Don't use a picture of you kissing your girlfriend as a profile pic.
- Khiva, on 04/22/2009, -2/+45Yeah dude, WTF is up with this? Are they just trying to show off? What the ***** is this kid, bling?
- cubicledrone, on 04/22/2009, -0/+42Join every threaded discussion with "O HAI FELLAS! WAT'S GOING ON IN THIS THREAD?"
- onederboy, on 04/22/2009, -1/+43http://www.fmylife.com/
Once it got popular people started using it for anything bad that happened to them, and it got old quick.
If your wife of 14 years cheats on you with a horse, then gives you horse aids, divorces you, takes everything, and marries Rush Limbaugh, then they send you box full of leeches who suck all your blood from your body, and the last thing you do before you die is update your Facebook status to reflect this, then you can use FML. If you stubbed your toe or ate Corn Flakes thinking it was Special K, that does not constitute an FML situation. - chiddler, on 04/22/2009, -3/+43My best friend think's he is a poetic genius so he always puts retarded unintelligible made up lyrics as status updates.
"I must have read a thousand faces. I must have robbed them of their cause." Is the most recent one. - chillitsagame, on 04/22/2009, -0/+38Meh when she finaly types "Rachel is dying SEND HELP!!!" i will like it
- wild, on 04/22/2009, -2/+39How about a picture of me kissing your girlfriend?
- wayhomer, on 04/22/2009, -0/+36you've already failed
- jamspt, on 04/22/2009, -0/+35So you drink too much and/or are greedy, hit on girls who aren't your girlfriend, and lie to people about where you go and what you do?
Quality.
I value your input. - ClarkNoHeart, on 04/22/2009, -11/+46Usually, but the newest version is pretty bad.
- foltaggio, on 04/22/2009, -8/+424) Don't overdo the religiosity.
- Thumper13, on 04/22/2009, -0/+33Stop ***** playing Mafia wars....not I will not join your stupid Mafia.
No, I didn't like you when we worked together....don't ask me to be your friend because you are a friend whore.
I love my friend dearly, but I don't care about each and every song you listen to throughout the day. - oxdeltaxo, on 04/22/2009, -0/+325.The internet is serious business.
- gregdigg, on 04/22/2009, -1/+33***** John Smith.
- HurricaneDC, on 04/22/2009, -1/+32Question: why are you friends with such vapid characters?
- lovernotfighter, on 04/22/2009, -2/+336) There is no rule 6.
- handheldchimp, on 04/22/2009, -0/+281) Add every application possible
2) Invite friends
3) ???
4) Become a depressed, lonely individual. - chriswastaken, on 10/27/2009, -8/+36Don't use facebook?
- Izz1011, on 04/22/2009, -1/+29I wondered why some people were updating their status like every 20 minutes... I thought they had just spontaneously become extra annoying. Twitter must be pretty dumb.
- itisme1760, on 04/22/2009, -2/+29Mark has just graffitied on your wall! Click here to graffiti back on his wall!
- Rkstar, on 04/22/2009, -1/+28I wonder why the video of it never made it to the front page. It's not because users haven't tried.
http://digg.com/comedy/Facebook_Manners_And_You
http://digg.com/comedy/Facebook_Manners_And_You_2
http://digg.com/celebrity/Facebook_Manners_and_You ...
http://digg.com/comedy/Facebook_Manners_And_You_4
http://digg.com/comedy/Facebook_Manners_And_You_5 - johnkeils, on 04/22/2009, -0/+27Man Rachel's constant mindless status updates really piss me off too...that and countdowns to some mundane event (like Rachel's birthday)
- Duffle, on 04/22/2009, -1/+28Do it, trolling people on Facebook is good for a quick laugh.
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