theonion.com — BOSTON?Thirty minutes into dinner with co-worker Natalie Cooper, Matthew Rolen, a marketing manager at Novartis Pharmaceuticals, realized Tuesday that what he thought was a date was actually a work-related get-together.
Jun 22, 2009 View in Crawl 4
duconihilumJun 22, 2009
I agreed with you up until the part where you say "Our culture kind of promotes this idea about "making a move" which essentially means violating a woman by making sexual advances without her permission."So what, you need permission to make an /advance/?"Excuse me, but might I try to...."So does she need written permission to flirt now? I mean, I'm not suggesting you just whip it out and start going, but to some extent you need to make moves and they should be spontaneous. It's easy to f**k up and not see some obvious "NO" signs if you're caught up in the moment, but as long as things are going well you need to make a move- otherwise you'll get instantly friend zoned.
emorgan33Jun 22, 2009
I'm sorry... was this story supposed to be funny?
robotbuddhaJun 22, 2009
"I was so excited all day," Rolen said. "When I got home from work, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom, just in case she wanted to drop by afterwards. I even got a haircut during my lunch hour. God, I'm pathetic."That triggered so many flashbacks to some of the most depressing points in my life. Nothing sadder than coming back from a date you thought was going to be amazing but flopped, and sitting alone in an apartment whose changes scream the loss at every glance.
gigglestickJun 22, 2009
We have now reached the point in our relationship where i will permit you to make sexual advances towards me. Go ahead, get started.
hanbanJun 22, 2009
tee hee unlucky.
hraesJun 23, 2009
hahahawait what
upickJun 23, 2009
Well he thought wrong, sucker