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- crapmatic, on 10/20/2007, -1/+22Too many page clicks, so it gets the crapmatic treatment.
20. Ashley Simpson, "La La": “You make me wanna la la, In the kitchen on the floor / I'll be a french maid, Where I'll meet you at the door.”
19. Jadakiss and Kanye West, "Gettin' It In": “Don't try to treat me like I ain’t famous / My apologies, are you into astrology? Cause I'm, I'm tryin to make it to Uranus.”
18. Styx, "Mr. Roboto": "“Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto / Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto.”
17. The Police, "Walking on the Moon": "“Giant steps are what you take, Walking on the moon / I hope my legs don't break, Walking on the moon.”
16. Foreigner, "Hot Blooded": “That's why I'm hot blooded, check it and see, / I got a fever of a hundred and three.”
15. Rod Stewart, "Every Picture Tells a Story": "“On the Peking ferry I was feeling merry, Sailing on my way back here, I fell in love with a slit eyed lady, By the light of an eastern moon, Shanghai Lil never used the pill.”
14. Steve Miller Band, "The Last Wombat in Mecca": "“There are few things I won't find, Some are better left alone / Like that bulldog in the bathroom,
Like that wombat on the phone.”
13. Steely Dan, "Josie": "“Jo would you love to scrapple / She'll never say no Shine up the battle apple”
12. King Crimson, "Ladies of the Road": "“High diving Chinese trender / Black hair and black suspender / Said, ‘Please me no surrender / Just love to feel your Fender’”
11. Michael Bolton, "Love is a Wonderful Thing": "“The only thing a river knows, Is runnin' to the sea / And every spring when a flower grows, It happens naturally.”
10. Jimmy Buffett, "Margaritaville": "“I blew out my flip flop / Stepped on a pop top.”
9. Peter Gunz, "Deja Vu": ""***** in the Bronx Call me Lex cause I push a Lex / And I rock a Rolex, And I lounge on Lex', And I love sex.”
8. Ram Jam, "Black Betty": "Whoa, black betty, Ram a lam, whoa, black betty, Black Betty had a child, Ram a lam, the damn thing gone wild, She said, ‘I'm worryin' outta mind,’ The damn thing gone blind.”
7. Red Hot Chili Peppers, "Snow": "Hey oh... listen what I say oh / I got your hey oh, now listen what I say oh”
6. The Smiths, "Reel Around the Fountain": "But take me to the haven of your bed, was something that you never said / two lumps, please, you're the bee's knees.”
5. Keith Urban, "You’ll Think of Me": “And take your cap and leave my sweater, Cause we got nothing left to weather, In fact I'll feel a whole lot better.”
4. Jungle Brothers, "Candy": "“After a little hanky panky, We make the room smell stanky, frankly, But I’m a man, I don’t give a damn. So what’s up? You wanna rub up horny, as I lay back in the cut?"
3. Emerson Lake and Palmer, "Karn Evil 9. Second Part.": "“Performing on a stool, We've a sight to make you drool, Seven virgins and a mule, Keep it cool. Keep it cool.”
2. Mariah Carey, "Don’t Stop": "“I'm like a bowl of gumbo / You ain't hotter than this, I'm what they play in the clubo.”
1. Bob Dylan, "Ballad of a Thin Man": "“You have many contacts, Among the lumberjacks, To get you facts, When someone attacks your imagination
But nobody has any respect, Anyway they already expect you, To just give a check, To tax-deductible charity organizations”
Crapmatic "how the hell could they forget this" addition:
0. Steve Miller Band "Take The Money & Run": "Billy Mack is a detective down in Texas / You know he knows just exactly what the facts is"
but kudos to them for Red Hot Chili Peppers' Snow... that rhyme is just cheesy. - creativeamp68, on 10/20/2007, -0/+21Kanye West: great dance tunes, HORRIBLE rhymes. I submit to you:
"You’d do anything for a Klondike/ Well, I’d do anything for a blond dike" - Stronger
"Like them eskimos, what would you do for a Klondike? / Or two dykes that look Christina Milian like." - Late
West is bringing back those ice cream bars single-handedly. - inactive, on 10/19/2007, -2/+22Your username is buttfayce.
- markperia, on 10/20/2007, -0/+19oh cmon! Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto?! Thats sheer genius right there!
- dunnylovehun, on 10/17/2007, -0/+16SNAP: I'm serious as cancer/ when I say rhythm is a dancer
Good list other than that glaring omission - zszaiss, on 10/20/2007, -1/+14No Beyonce? "Can you pay my bills, can you pay my automo-bills?" That fake rhyme makes me cringe every time.
- DiggDugglas, on 10/20/2007, -1/+13"I'm feelin satisfaction from the street crowd reaction
Chumps pull guns when they feel afraid, too late
When they dip in the kick they get sprayed
LEMONADE WAS A POPULAR DRINK AND IT STILL IS
I get more props and stunts than Bruce Willis"
-Guru of Gangstar D.W.Y.C.K. - Sesq, on 10/20/2007, -0/+10What about Beyonce in Irreplaceable?
"I can have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute"
You can't rhyme "minute" with "minute" !! - lexf, on 10/17/2007, -0/+10Door hinge?
- j3one, on 10/19/2007, -3/+13actualy, it's a "moron" glitch...
damn it. - jermscentral, on 10/18/2007, -0/+8Can we not just insert every current rap "song" in to this list?
- lazyfisherman, on 10/17/2007, -0/+8I thought it was "Sk8r Boi"
- navster15, on 10/20/2007, -0/+8Actually, that was a Destiny's Child song. Not that it makes much of a difference, but it took THREE of them to come up with that spot of genius.
- cwiggum, on 10/20/2007, -0/+7I would have to give the honors to Lil Flip...
"I'll treat you like milk, I'll do nothing but spoil you"
I don't know about you, but I don't know anyone that intentionally lets their milk go bad... - adooga, on 10/17/2007, -0/+7This is a lame selection - most of these aren't really bad because of the rhyme, they're just awful lyrics. Not much depth in the list either - should have got someone with a decent knowledge of music to help them write it.
And no "masses" - the most obvious one. Buried buried buried. - JJCDAD, on 10/20/2007, -0/+7Nothing rhymes with ORANGE dammit!
- ReverendRodger, on 10/20/2007, -0/+7No Limp Bizkit?
No Digg.
:P - Fluffiness, on 10/17/2007, -0/+6Why is everything by Fred Durst not on this list? Hmm?
"Where we gonna run? Maybe we can meet up on the sun." - RyanBlueThunder, on 10/17/2007, -0/+6BURIED for that no talent ass clown Michael Bolton
- Kitsune818, on 10/20/2007, -0/+5The song had different lyrics right up until they recorded it for paranoid. It was "Witches gather at black masses/burning bodies in red ashes"
- picsectionpleez, on 10/17/2007, -0/+5Dude that's one of the best lines of all times!!!
- dnic24, on 10/17/2007, -2/+7“I blew out my flip flop,
Stepped on a pop top.” - wow - good work there jimmy - chucksmooth, on 10/17/2007, -0/+4 For my money.. I don't know if it gets any better than when he sings 'when a man loves a woman'
- Solardog, on 10/20/2007, -0/+4Seriously. When did King Crimson even TRY to rhyme? Buried as lame. "The world's my oyster soup kitchen floor wax museum....."
- ecoastkid, on 10/17/2007, -0/+4"Just stay out of my way or you'll pay, listen to what I say."
"Hey, why don't I just go and eat some hay. I can lay by the bay, make things out of clay, I just may, what'd ya say?" - lazyfisherman, on 10/17/2007, -0/+4These Cracked selections are not the worst.
- inactive, on 10/17/2007, -0/+4Sporange
The sac in plants in which the spores are produced or carried. - lazyfisherman, on 10/17/2007, -0/+4It is genius. Genius and everyone knows it.
- GawtMilk, on 10/17/2007, -0/+3Uh, that's called "repetition".
An example of a bad rhyme would be,
"We sure weren't put here to be hate
It would make us late
Stuck in traffic eating casserole of a plate
But nobody wants to get me a date
I guess that's my fate". - amneosis, on 10/20/2007, -0/+3It's blocked at work, is antichrist/ anarchist in there? people always reference that despite it being THE. MOST. AWESOME. PSEUDORHYME.
- mlvassallo, on 10/17/2007, -0/+3Some of these are classic. And I don't find Mr. Roboto to be that lame...
- adooga, on 10/20/2007, -0/+3That's kind of the point - different meaning so technically kosha but phonetically it's just the same word.
- breadfred, on 10/17/2007, -1/+4googled: Avril Lavigne
Link to lyrics: http://www.mp3lyrics.org/a/avril-lavigne/skater-bo ... - kaptnkrunch, on 10/20/2007, -1/+4I dont know if this is necessarily bad...but i burst out laughing the first time i heard it:
let me give you some swimming lessons on the penis
backstroke, breaststroke, stroke of a genius
-Ludacris - melonhedd, on 10/20/2007, -0/+3That one is okay because it is a different meaning of "masses"
- vat0r, on 10/17/2007, -0/+3Vanilla Ice .. Enough said.
- Boshow, on 10/19/2007, -1/+4Really intelligent there, sucko.
- liquidjamm, on 10/17/2007, -0/+3I'm hot, cuz I'm hot
you're not, cuz you're not.
http://www.villagevoice.com/music/0711,harvilla,76 ...
Oh serenity now!!!SERENITY NOW!!!!111!!!!1111 - picsectionpleez, on 10/19/2007, -0/+3good catch +1 sir
- inactive, on 10/19/2007, -0/+2What I hate is when people try to rhyme with "again" - using words that rhyme with "gain".
Look, just because it's SPELLED that way doesn't mean you can rhyme that way.
Say pain. Say again. If you say "a-gain" and pronounce it "gain", then you're just trying too hard to overcompensate for a lack of vocabulary.
Don't ***** put them together and call it a rhyme. - oldhick, on 10/17/2007, -0/+2No doubt. I miss good ole' pop tops every now and again... Then I think about the cuts and slices and am glad they're gone!
- robberry, on 10/19/2007, -0/+2What's weird about it (besides the fact that it's a *rap* in the middle of a *Rush* song, which is not a sentence I had ever expected to type in my lifetime) is that the rest of the song is a fairly serious meditation on the nature of fate, and how we humans do (and ought to) respond to it. The first verse is a rejection of the Calvinist/Objectivist viewpoint that the rich deserve their fortune and the poor deserve their poverty. The second takes to task those who excuse God's apparent refusal to care for the creatures he created. The chorus encourages the listener not to succumb to the temptation of fatalism, but to live life and strive for happiness anyway. These are all very deep, very serious thoughts... and then, seemingly out of nowhere, comes that rap. It's like wandering through the Louvre, admiring the great works of art on display, and then suddenly stumbling into a room filled with nothing but lolcat pictures.
- pistonhonda, on 10/30/2007, -0/+2Come on, Reel Around the Fountain is a classic Smiths song. Just because they don't understand the lyrics doesn't mean they're bad.
- bonjourmr, on 04/25/2008, -0/+2I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch, chinese food makes me sick.
- bib4tuna, on 10/17/2007, -0/+2i came here with the intention of posting this since it wasnt on the list. mad props for knowing the horrific nature of this 'song'. kick some gluteus max.
- BubbaTX, on 10/17/2007, -1/+3The problem is, how many of you kiddos even know what a "pop top" is?
- inactive, on 11/01/2007, -1/+3no i won't, sorry
- inactive, on 10/17/2007, -0/+2“The only thing a river knows,
Is runnin' to the sea,
And every spring when a flower grows,
It happens naturally.” - Godlike, on 10/17/2007, -0/+2I mean, not that alts don't write good musicals, probably write the best, but there are some really REALLY bad ones that reminds me more of...
- Boshow, on 10/19/2007, -1/+3Fine, but at #1?
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