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The 5 Most Needlessly Complex Terror Plots in Film History

cracked.com — Real terrorist plots tend to have two steps: blow stuff up, take credit. Maybe if they're feeling creative they'll blow themselves up or light their shoe on fire first.

Who dugg this? Made popular May 9, 2008

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  • ElBeh, on 05/09/2008, -2/+42Gosh, Cracked is really looking hard for topics to write about.
  • FearFactory, on 05/09/2008, -1/+27GET OFF MY PLANE!!!!!
  • killbert24, on 05/09/2008, -4/+30Speed was a good popcorn flick back in the day, even if the plot was pretty stupid.
  • OnlyGirlOnDigg, on 05/09/2008, -2/+24Sean Connery kicked ass in The Rock
  • barrakuda, on 05/09/2008, -1/+19Snakes...on a plane.
    Infinitely more ridiculous.
  • spyd3rweb, on 05/09/2008, -2/+19How about that one from The Lone Gunman where they plan to hijack an airplane and crash it into the the World Trade Center?
  • nerdherder, on 05/09/2008, -1/+16Stay tuned for a list of the top five things I have found in my belly button!
  • elrac, on 05/09/2008, -3/+17Go on.
  • jankind, on 05/09/2008, -0/+11And if it weren't for google image search, I would have most likely watched that movie too.
  • inactive, on 05/09/2008, -1/+12There was that Travolta flick where you got to see Halle Berry topless "Swordfish" Travolta was a terrorist stealing money from banks in the US...so he could fund killing other terrorists?
  • inactive, on 05/09/2008, -2/+9Jimmy Hoffa!
  • OnlyGirlOnDigg, on 05/09/2008, -1/+8the article never said that it wasn't
  • CaviMike, on 05/09/2008, -1/+7Live Free or Die Hard. If all they had to do was send all the gas pressure to something to blow it up, why did they waste their time with all of the other *****?
  • GJBlizzard, on 05/09/2008, -0/+5I was never able to get past how terrible Die Hard 2 was to take a real good look at the "intricacies" of the plot.
  • Hitpoint, on 05/09/2008, -2/+5Yeah... i hate deep plots too...
  • WolverineBlue, on 05/09/2008, -0/+3The 5 Most Needlessly Needless Cracked.com articles. (and Diggers would still read it)
  • MalkyMalc, on 05/10/2008, -0/+3Yeah, I think you knew what you were signing up for with Speed. It was one of the last straight-up no-nonsense stupid action movies, that knew what they were and how to deliver bombs, baddies and boobs.
  • cresswga, on 05/09/2008, -0/+3How was Dog Soldiers a terror plot? It was a bunch of soliders on exercise in the Scottish countryside who stumble across some werewolves.
  • mindbullets, on 05/09/2008, -2/+4did he know about the speed activation at the time though? He may have just thought there was a bomb on the busy, i can't remember.
  • ostracize, on 05/09/2008, -0/+2As soon as he got on the bus he said to the driver: "50! Stay above 50!"
  • ZigVicious, on 05/09/2008, -0/+2yeah.
  • vondrak, on 05/09/2008, -4/+7Where was Superman (1978)? Lex is going to sink California so his crappy real estate will become ocean front property?
    btw, I'm not knocking superman, just Luther for always trying to work real estate into his criminal "super genius" plans.
  • mille716, on 05/09/2008, -1/+2...when you're 14.
  • jennabunnykins, on 05/11/2008, -0/+1A top 5 list on two pages.. sigh. Why Cracked-- WHY??
  • BrainInAJar, on 05/12/2008, -0/+1the money's in real estate *nod*
  • redfan, on 05/09/2008, -1/+2Speed Reading was better.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yaKxRN2LdEI
  • inactive, on 05/10/2008, -0/+1I see what you did there.
  • x0rcist, on 05/09/2008, -8/+9Buried. The Rock is a fantastic film.
  • MalkyMalc, on 05/10/2008, -0/+1Arlington Road should totally be number one. Action movies can be forgiven for having a daft/contrived plot, but that movie took itself a little too seriously.
    Anyone remember Jeff Bridges running up to the car at the end? Jowls flapping everywhere? Nnnnnnnoooooooooooooooooooooo!
  • ShooterMcGavin, on 05/09/2008, -2/+3I have read a book that puts all of these movies to shame in the Needlessly-Complex hall of fame.

    Black Wind by Clive Cussler. If any of you have read that, you will instantly agree with me.

    http://jasonhaberman.com/index.php/2006/08/22/blac ...

    It was unbelievable just how insane that book was.
  • b3owulf, on 05/09/2008, -0/+1Seconded
  • SpectralSounds, on 05/09/2008, -0/+1Die Hard 3 was actually a pretty practical idea for robbing that bank.
  • pin0chet, on 05/10/2008, -0/+1it's actually quite a funny and well-written article, despite the quixotic nature of the topic
  • Diggey11, on 05/09/2008, -0/+1The Rock still kicked major ass.
  • NeoCortex, on 05/09/2008, -0/+1Not even an honorary mention for the James Bond series?
  • StuartGibson, on 06/14/2009, -0/+1God knows we didn't need those movies. LA LA LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU GEORGE
  • MaxMWood, on 05/09/2008, -0/+1I thought all those films were great. Just for the record, Die Hard 4.0 sucked.
  • Hardac, on 05/09/2008, -1/+2Natalee Holloway
  • zoethebitch, on 05/09/2008, -0/+0Young actress pictured with Harrison Ford is now worth close to $500M

    (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liesel_Pritzker and many other sources)
  • italics, on 05/09/2008, -2/+2Keanu Reeves's character in speed wasn't an explosives expert? In fact, he had to call someone who was in order to attempt the disarm.
  • solid12345, on 05/10/2008, -1/+1How about the worst and most confusing & complex terror plot of them all - The Matrix

    So let's see there has been like uh...7 matrixes...and 7 neos...all humans are wiped out and started back to 24, and they all reproduce and get put back in the goo....rinse, recycle, repeat, oh and they all make their way back down to Zion again somehow

  • BabyWookie, on 05/09/2008, -1/+1Monster's Ball was a lot better in that respect. Fully naked Helle gets her ass pounded by Billy Bob Thornton. LOL.
  • mindbullets, on 05/09/2008, -6/+6The Rock's plot wasn't that complex and it did make sense. What a great movie.
  • pin0chet, on 05/10/2008, -1/+1brilliant comment. thank you, sir.
  • jplily, on 05/10/2008, -0/+0i hate deep plots too...
  • ParanoydAndroid, on 05/10/2008, -2/+2Congratulations on deciphering that sentence. I found it more convoluted than the damn plot line he was referring to.
  • lolwutpear, on 05/16/2008, -0/+0he went home and ***** the prom queen after making it
  • rspeed, on 05/09/2008, -1/+1"It was christmas in Die Hard 2 Blizzard or not it was going to be cold icy with poor visibility"

    IN VIRGINIA! It rarely drops below freezing that time of year, much less have a ***** blizzard.
  • carl0ski, on 05/09/2008, -1/+0definitely should have been instead of The Rock

    Nothing more bizarre than using kid game activated bombs to distract the police force while you steal the worlds gold
    then furthermore pretend to blow it up with not so pretend explosives
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