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everyclickmatters.com - It's raw head-banging talent against raw meat. See the showdown. Seriously.
79 Comments
- Otto, on 10/11/2007, -0/+61For those of you at work who cannot see cracked.com:
#5. It is Impossible to get Fired from the Police Force
#4. Every Single German is a Dick
#3. Black People Can't Wait to Help You
#2. A Well-Timed “Yippee Ki Yay *****” Will Get You Out of Any Jam
#1. Alcohol Makes You a Stronger, Louder, More Efficient American Killing Machine - enpherno72z, on 10/11/2007, -1/+50Hey...I'm German!...wait, I guess I am a little bit of a dick though...dammit.
- troglodytejb, on 10/11/2007, -1/+31I wanna throw in a digg-specific lesson I learned from "Live Free or Die Hard:"
Hacking is always done through a custom GUI that resembles no known OS. When you're going to blow up someone's computer, a dialog box pops up to show the progress with the headline "Uploading Virus." Everything is hackable, and once hacked, you have complete, 100% control of it. - rstarr, on 10/11/2007, -2/+17YKYMF FTW!
- enpherno72z, on 10/11/2007, -2/+15I would say Chuck Norris, but that is only if he cuts out McClaines toungue and prevents him from using YKYMF.
- Fhwqhgads, on 10/11/2007, -0/+10#9: a five item list fits easily on one page.
- DaWolfman, on 10/11/2007, -3/+12Dugg for your ability to take a joke. A lesser man would have cried, "But I'm German! Germans really aren't like that!" and would have written several tedious paragraphs as to why that's the case.
- Otto, on 10/11/2007, -1/+8Spectacles, Testicles, Wallet and Watch. Simple.
- nsummy, on 10/11/2007, -1/+8Although you can't be fired from the police force, you can be suspended. I believe he was serving a suspension when he is called back into action in Die Hard with a Vengence
- ccrw, on 10/11/2007, -2/+8rules to live by....
- ab2650, on 10/11/2007, -1/+6More pertinent, who would win a fight: Period or Semicolon?
- DoctaStooge, on 10/11/2007, -0/+5I'm curious as to when people started dissecting jokes instead of just appreciating and laughing at them.
- digitalmob, on 10/11/2007, -0/+5"Five Lessons Learned from Watching Die Hard" means John McClane is teaching us, or professing to us, some valuable life lessons.
- lukeydukey, on 10/11/2007, -0/+5I think if they wanted to make it authentic they would use knoppix. Or if they wanted to stick with windows they could have used BSOD's so they would be forced to do a hard shut down.
- troglodytejb, on 10/11/2007, -0/+5"Authentic" and "Hacking" are not two words that go together in modern movies, methinks. It's funny to those who know, which is why I wrote the lesson I learned, but real hacking is boring and tedious.
"Did you see what I did there? I used SQL injection to take his webpage down! Haha, LOSER!"
"... That took you 2 hours, and it didn't bring the US to it's knees?" - mhummel, on 10/11/2007, -2/+6Let's do the acid test:
"So that's four prawn Goebells, a Herman Georing, and four Colditz salads...."
Don't mention the War! - MrDarkSim, on 10/11/2007, -0/+4I'm suprised the article is only two pages instead of five.
- Grova, on 10/11/2007, -1/+5 “Yippee Ki Yay *****”
- lukeydukey, on 10/11/2007, -1/+5Chuck Norris would roundhouse kick McClane and then McClane would drive an SUV into Norris and send him to a fiery death at the bottom of an elevator shaft....wait a second...
- sacherjj, on 10/11/2007, -0/+4Please visit Wikipedia. Look up sarcasm. Read. Then reread.
- inactive, on 10/11/2007, -2/+5Macgyver would beat both their asses with only a match stick, a empty soda bottle and 2 feet of duct tape
- DivisibleByZero, on 10/11/2007, -0/+3When McClane was wearing the "I hate everybody" (that's what the edited for TV version said. Cracks me up every time) sign, Zeus helped him out.
- OwdenBowden, on 10/11/2007, -0/+3You forgot #6 Making Fists with your toes on carpet help sore feet!
- nsummy, on 10/11/2007, -4/+7Also, Samuel L. Jackson didn't want to help Bruce Willis at all in Die Hard 3. Quite the opposite actually. The only reason he did was because Simon made him go along and he was also under the impression there was a bomb going to Harlem.
- hockeyisgd, on 10/11/2007, -0/+3#7 Terrorists read Time Magazine
- Skas, on 10/11/2007, -0/+3Probably when he started teaching them things? Curious as to how that one got past you?
- MateyO, on 10/11/2007, -0/+3As a Security professional, LFoDH was painful to watch. 10 minutes in, I turned the suspension of disbelief knob to 4...then after a bit, to 8. Then all the way up to 11, and I was still only 30 minutes in.
Remember kiddies, the badguys aren't any more protected than the good guys...
'He sent us an eBomb' [foreheadslap]
All super computer facilities use liquid nitrogen for cooling, above razor sharp spinning blades of doom.
Well, at least ours does. Doesn't yours? - Hosalabad, on 10/11/2007, -0/+3#1 is so wrong, when is he a lush in any movie?
I think they confused The Last Boy Scout - inactive, on 10/11/2007, -0/+3What the Hell!!!! When they aired it on TV in India it wasn't changed and retained the "I Hate *****" sign. Damn and i thought Indian censorship was bad.
- orp2000, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2Hey! I'm German, and I'm not a...oh, ok, maybe a little...nevermind.
- RobN, on 10/11/2007, -2/+4I really wanted to like the top-5 list, but it was lame. Really lame. More lame than running from a fighter jet in a semi truck while going UP a freeway ramp that's falling apart underneath you.
John McLane rocks. He and Jack Bauer need to get together some day. Then they could go after bloggers who terrorize us by posting trash like this top-5 list (which tries much harder than John to be clever, or witty, but fails miserably -- give me a "Yippee Kah Yay, MF" any day). - radiometric, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2But two pages can hold twice as many ads.
[I figured the white spots hold ads if you use IE?]
AdBlock FTW! - nathorne, on 10/11/2007, -1/+3#8 No matter how many times you avert a terrorism crisis, everybody forgets about you, conveniently, in the same amount of time required for Hollywood to make a sequel.
- chownrus, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2Who dugg you down? Haven't you people seen Fawlty Towers?
- sacherjj, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2We aren't talking about 24 here...
- Hungryhaney, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2on #4 - I am German and I agree! :-P
- NerdyNinja, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2Yeah, reminds me of Swordfish, which Hollywood-izes programming so much. "I just drank a bottle of wine and I'm so much better at hacking now!"
[spoiler?]
I think the best part of Diehard 4 was the fact that Bruce Willis didn't even try to say some clever line, he just looked like he was having the time of his life, and would laugh at the people he ruthlessly and inventively murdered. Best post-kill line is the guy who goes through the spinning blades or whatever and he just goes "oh no! gyahaha..." No ***** like "Jump out of THAT" or something retarded. [/spoiler]
I really enjoyed how McClane is obviously an old fashioned guy with absolutely no sense of what's trendy (kung fu, computers, etc) and still stacks up his chips against the enemy. - DoctaStooge, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2bibcroth, do you mean like people trying to read too much into a joke? Yea, I know what you mean.
- lukeydukey, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2#9 Don't ever break the heart of a girl with the last name Genero/McClane.
- estacado, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2Or try to touch her boobs.
- estacado, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2More like Mother*gunshot*.
- inactive, on 10/11/2007, -0/+2Yippee Ki Yay *****!
- radiometric, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1I like to think of Willis' character in that movie as Bizarro McClane
- estacado, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1I watched DH4 and Transformers on the same day, and DH4 is waaay better than Transformers. The black truck vs. jet scene from DH4 is better than Optimus vs. Starscream. Transformers really disappoints, but McClane exceeded expectations.
- artofwar420, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1Does it even matter? To anyone but you?
- MurderMystery, on 10/11/2007, -1/+2Yippee Ki Yay Mr. Falcon!
- g30ph, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1He was not on duty in any of the movies. In the first he was a NY cop visiting LA to see his wife and kids, in the 2nd he was an LA cop visiting D.C. for some reason. In the 3rd he was a NY cop again, and suspended for something. In the 4th he was off duty "on his way home" stalking his daughter when he got called to bring the Mac guy to the feds.
- g30ph, on 10/11/2007, -1/+2The top 5 list sucks. McCLane was never on duty in any of the movies, so it was ok for him to have been drinking. Besides he was only hung over in the 3rd movie, there was no on-screen drunkenness. He was on suspension in the 3rd movie too.
He only said yippee kay yay mfer when he was blowing away a bad guy at the end of the movie.
I think everyone he killed was a legit kill, not a murder.
He may have been stalking his daughter, but he wasn't terrorizing the boyfriend. He pull him out of the car when he thought his daughter was getting raped.
I have no comment about the foreigners. - xike, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1Hell, he could do it with 6 inches of duct tape.
- dragonopolis, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1Some of you are idiots............
Not all present day movies, books, whatever are totally non-fiction. This is a FICTIONAL MOVIE if you came to see a reality show you came to the wrong movie.
This was a great fictional action flick.
Thumbs up here. -
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