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5 Post-Star Wars Careers Almost as Pathetic as Mark Hamills

cracked.com — Let us take a moment to appreciate these guys who helped make the original Star Wars great, and who have lived sad, sad lives since.

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  • lukifer, on 10/30/2007, -3/+75Pathetic? Mark Hamill is a talented and prolific voice actor.
    • rpoynter, on 10/17/2007, -1/+17agreed. what an ignorant statement. ever watched the animated batman of '98ish? metaloclypse? hamil's voice is all over it.
    • dirtyfrog, on 10/19/2007, -1/+14He also played "***** Knocker" in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.
    • dioscaido, on 10/17/2007, -1/+2Agreed! Metalocalypse for the WIN!
    • spyrochaete, on 10/17/2007, -1/+5He played Detective Mosely in the Gabriel Knight adventure game series. He did a great job of the New Orleans southern accent.
      • Juniper200, on 10/17/2007, -0/+3***** Wing Commander; GK1 is my favorite Hamill video game appearance.
    • unreg, on 10/18/2007, -0/+5Compared to Britney Spears, my friend Mark is doing just fine.
      • Lugano, on 10/23/2007, -0/+6Compared to Britney Spears, the guy sleeping down the street in a cardboard box is doing pretty well...
  • Teck64, on 10/17/2007, -10/+233 diggs, front page and no comments, thats a first.
  • miriv365, on 10/25/2007, -1/+26Mark Hammill did the voice work for the Joker in the Batman cartoon. Sure it wasn't on-screen acting, but it was good nevertheless.
  • madholepunch, on 10/23/2007, -5/+10metalocalypse ain't pathetic, buried as inaccurate.
  • DaveXensen, on 10/23/2007, -5/+3Have we forgotten that Mark Hamill is a voice actor in the famed adult swim show Metalocalypse?
  • AndrewDB, on 01/10/2008, -3/+10Mark Hammill is an incredible voice actor and he's been very successful;

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Hamill
  • dupeduperson, on 10/23/2007, -4/+9hello? mark hamill? the voice of the joker? The voice from wing commander? Think again - success.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Hamill
  • SimianSamurai, on 10/25/2007, -1/+22Mark Hamill (not "Hammill") has a very successful career as a voice actor, and is one of the more sought-after voices in cartoons today. His credits include:
    Futurama
    Metalocalypse (Rock!)
    Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law
    Robot Chicken
    Batman
    Spiderman
    Superman
    Justice League
    Johnny Quest
    Powerpuff Girls
    3 Wing Commander games
    Call of Duty 2

    there's more, just read up on imdb
    • anillop, on 10/17/2007, -0/+1The cartoon network has been very very good to him.
  • DelSolid, on 10/23/2007, -3/+2What about Jar Jar? he has gone on to some great things...
  • acdcfanbill, on 10/30/2007, -1/+9The first guy they tackle is Peter Cushing? The guy was practically a star from his Hammer film days.
    • dillonstars, on 10/17/2007, -0/+2For sure. Peter Cushing was more than just 'practically' a star... he was a living legend. Plus he was already 63 when he did Star Wars, so can hardly be expected to be prolific after that! Christopher Lee had a bit of an advantage being 10 years younger.
  • floatingpoints, on 10/25/2007, -1/+7I didn't know Howard Stern played Chewbacca..
  • NickyBatts, on 10/25/2007, -0/+12This thing is BS if only for the Peter Cushing *****... what's pathetic about that dudes life? ***** Mark Hamill, Cushing is raw as hell.

    1984 anyone?
    • sdcarter, on 10/17/2007, -0/+1your point is moot... he liked birdwatching... that's arguably worse than stamp collecting. But I will agree, Cushing WAS "raw as hell."
  • sexydarin, on 10/17/2007, -1/+2Just because he didn't make it as an actor doesn't mean he lived a sad, sad life. He probably lived a happy,happy life.
    • lukifer, on 10/17/2007, -0/+2He probably also played hungry, hungry hippos while eating double, double, chex, chex.
  • hockey, on 10/30/2007, -2/+18Buried for lame jab at Mark Hamill
  • koonchu, on 10/17/2007, -1/+8Terribly inaccurate and just plain ol' mean.
  • AllenAllen, on 10/30/2007, -1/+7None are working as night-shift WalMart janitors and living in their mom's basements like the creators of these snarky comments. :-)
  • cloudyprison, on 10/23/2007, -1/+8Sounds like some journalist (wannabe?) is upset they weren't in a Star Wars movie.
  • objectcode, on 10/30/2007, -1/+12the author of this article has a much better career no doubt.
  • brstilson, on 10/17/2007, -0/+2So they had three actual actors and the rest of the guys were just people behind masks? One of the guys wasn't even that major of a role. It's pretty hard to be typecast when you don't even show your face.

    There are far better actors they could have had on here. Where's Hayden Christenson?
    • sdcarter, on 10/30/2007, -0/+3Hayden still has a chance since he's so young. He has some new movie called Jumper coming out that looks... interesting. It co-stars Samuel L. so that's promising.

      Although, he should be on here simply for how bad his acting was in 2&3. Christenson pretty much ruined those movies for me with his emo *****. But then again, he was only acting the role Lucas wrote/directed.
  • sefalese, on 10/17/2007, -1/+3everytime chinese builds a wall goddamn mongolians always try to knock it down
  • mayhemchaos, on 10/25/2007, -0/+6Mark Hamill brought balance to the force as Luke Skywalker and saved an entire galaxy. What other role in movie history can live up to that?
  • chrisOrbit, on 10/23/2007, -2/+7The article is complete crap and sounds like it was written by a 4 year old.
  • mayhemchaos, on 10/17/2007, -2/+2He played Luke Skywalker and saved an entire galaxy. What other role does he need to be "successful".
  • lpmiller, on 10/23/2007, -1/+9I think more people need to point out Mark Hamill's voice work.
  • Zedizdead, on 10/23/2007, -2/+3The only thing that is pathetic is this article.
  • sdcarter, on 10/17/2007, -0/+5Best comment I've read in a while (quoted from blog comments):


    GhostLine06
    I actually almost got into a fight with Boba/Bulloch at a bar after a SciFi convention ten years ago in Hartford, CT. The guy just wouldn't stop hitting on my girlfriend all day and night (she worked at the convention). I am a peaceful person and not one to get involved in fights, but with enough beer and the director of the convention egging me on with "Come-on man Boba Fett is trying to go home with your girlfriend." and "You should just kick his ass so you can tell people my friend beat down Fett" etc... It was getting to a point where beating the ***** out of an old short British actor was sounding good to my drunken 22 year old mind. Alas cooler thoughts prevailed and that night I got laid while he went back to his motel room alone to play with his pulse cannon. Now if he was actually wearing his Boba Fett costume at the bar… then I would have had to beat his ass, just for the bragging rights.
    Posted on 10/17/2007 9:02:40 AM
  • brianzero, on 10/25/2007, -2/+4How is this list of achievements not success? Mark has been working steadily since 1970!

    http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000434/
  • Eallan, on 10/23/2007, -1/+6Does anybody know if Mark Hamill has done any cartoon voiceovers?
  • YouandWhoseArmy, on 10/17/2007, -2/+1People need to stop digging these crappy cracked and double viking pages.
  • Henchman24, on 10/17/2007, -1/+1This is pretty sad even for a Cracked list.
  • Azumoth, on 10/23/2007, -1/+1It's funny, because Mark Hamill probably has a less-pathetic paycheck compared to the writer of the article.
  • Stalks, on 10/17/2007, -0/+15 PORN STAR!? OMG AWESOME! .. oh wait. :(
  • SpectralSounds, on 10/17/2007, -0/+2That Darth Tater toy is awesome. I want one.
    Also, Mark Hamill rules.
  • unreg, on 10/23/2007, -0/+2They ain't exactly kicking down Carrie Fishers door these day either.

    Were all these "stars" participants in the infamous Holiday Star Wars special?
  • tbenathan, on 10/17/2007, -0/+2Hayden Christensen makes Paul Walker look like Peter O'Toole. Something tells me that Lucas' "great find" will have an abysmal, inconspicuous career.
  • Boognish, on 10/17/2007, -0/+1"You're far too trusting. Dantooine is too remote to make an effective demonstration. But don't worry, we will deal with your rebel friends soon enough." You could have at least spelled it correctly you lame ass douche cheese!
    • Georgery, on 10/23/2007, -0/+1Hmm. The writer of the article made one small typo. Therefore, the whole article must be complete and utter *****, purged from our memories, and we should crucify the person who wrote the article for such a horrendous crime against humanity.
  • melonhedd, on 10/17/2007, -1/+1Another ***** Cracked.com article that forgets to set a background-color
  • crakbot, on 10/17/2007, -0/+0This is one thing I hate about American culture. If you do one thing that is one million times more successful then most people ever do, but fail to do it a second time, you are considered a failure. Like if you are a one term president, you are considered somewhat of a failure, or if you had only one huge hit, you are a failure. Geez! Tough crowd!
  • justinil, on 10/23/2007, -1/+1buried as inaccurate. Mark Hamill voiced the Joker on Batman: the Animated Series, which would become the basis for many incarnations of the Joker following it. and that is a free ticket to lifelong badassery.
  • toxicityj, on 10/17/2007, -0/+1NOBODY makes fun of Wedge Antilles and gets away with it. expect a visit from Rogue Squadron, jackass
  • vfx2k4, on 10/17/2007, -0/+0What a cruel and stupid article. Those folks are laughing all the way to the bank to cash the 1,000th LucasFilm Ltd. residuals check. Ha ha ha.
  • arnoldrimmer, on 10/23/2007, -1/+0Smegheads!!!!!! Mark Hamill did also Sea Quest....
  • dmann, on 10/23/2007, -1/+1yeah.... lets see, he didn't end up being a 20 million dollar asshole like Harrison Ford (to paraphrase Joe Pantilano) so that's pathetic. Gee, it sure would suck to be a working actor who has the esteem and praise of everyone he ever works with, and yet be home for dinner with your family. What a crappy career, he's a loser. Excuse me, the fryolator is overflowing and the burger press is jammed.
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