What is Digg?81 Comments
- pype, on 10/12/2007, -1/+97From the bars I've been to - drunk humans act like monkeys.
Can I have a grant? - Bogtha, on 10/12/2007, -0/+76I don't know about anybody else, but I've never seen a drunken monkey phone their ex at 3am.
- geoboy, on 10/12/2007, -2/+57Quite an amusing study. Just don't let the PETA people know about it...
Anyway, now I wanna see how monkeys act after smoking pot. Somebody give me some monkeys, some pot, and a $10,000 grant. Actually, forget the monkeys. - toastgodsupreme, on 10/12/2007, -4/+51Thank god this age old question has been answered.
To imagine that someone got paid to watch monkies get wasted. What a great world we live in. - dj_sea2005, on 10/12/2007, -0/+34"i'll have two vodka's and a banana"
- fletchowns, on 10/12/2007, -1/+25I wonder if drunk female monkeys end up sleeping with random monkeys and having one night stands.
- ntnwwnet, on 10/12/2007, -1/+25Anywhere where they have drunk monkeys is THE place to be.
- EGOvoruhk, on 10/12/2007, -0/+17The money comes from grants. Taxes go to stuff like that. Rich people just throw money at scientists to watch monkeys get drunk
- coredump0x01, on 10/12/2007, -1/+16Getting a bunch of monkeys drunk. . . now _THAT'S_ what I call science! =)
- tjl2015, on 10/12/2007, -3/+18Exactly! Think of the mysterious untapped by science! Do stoned chimps get the munchies? If so, would they prefer Doritos or pretzels? If enough monkeys pounding away on typewriters for long enough will create Shakespeare, will enough stoned monkeys create Bill and Teds Excellent Adventure?
- Kypt, on 10/12/2007, -1/+13One of my aunts had a monkey (don't remember what kind) which she would always take to a special room whenever there were parties and people weren't too fond of monkeys. Well, she also kept the liquor there but there was never a problem until one time the monkey finally found what those bottles were for. They found him dead morning after of a heart attack (or so the vet said) and lots of opened bottles.
Funny to think of the monkey being drunk, but still sad that it died :/ - tjl2015, on 10/12/2007, -4/+15The same thing happened to my great uncle's pet midget...
- Teazo, on 10/12/2007, -1/+10I want to see the video! Where's the torrent?
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+8Hmmm..."Research Shows Drunk Monkeys Act Like Humans"
Is that "Research Shows Drunk Monkeys Act Like Drunk Humans" or "Research Shows Drunk Monkeys Act Like Sober Humans"? - veloscaper, on 10/12/2007, -0/+8This is part 2 of a monkeys are human story. Did anyone catch the related stories link "Monkeys Pay to View Sexy Photos".
"Feb. 7, 2005: Pay-per-view television channels prove that humans will shell out cash to see sex and celebrities; now a new study reveals that monkeys also will pay to see sexy photographs and images of high-status individuals within their own social groups.
The study is the first to show that monkeys appraise visual information for its social value and can then use this data to spontaneously discriminate between images of their fellow monkeys. "
so we got booze, porn. now we need some study showing how monkeys willing cheat/steal other monkeys out of earned treats or monkeys on top of the social ladder do less work and reap most of the benefits kind of study. - ccanni1028, on 10/12/2007, -1/+9Who cares? They got free money and used it to get monkeys drunk!
- paulrus, on 10/12/2007, -3/+10Pure genius!!! Monkeys drinking alcohol get drunk. What's next? Monkeys that eat McDonalds every day get fat?
Say it ain't so!
Since when did Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies become a scientist?
"Say Pa, I done got me some monkeys... let's give 'em some moonshine and see wut happens!" - sky321, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6All this experience is totaly redundant. They could have reached the same conclusion scientifically without actually doing it.
Lemma 1: The more someone looks like a monkey, the more alcohol is required to get him/her laid.
Lemma 2: Monkeys get laid often
Conclusion - Monkeys consume a lot of alcohol. - cob05, on 10/12/2007, -2/+7Funny, I think I went to college with some of those monkeys...
- stewartallen, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5I've seen drunk monkeys/baboons many times. When marula (African fruit similar to a fig but with bigger) lies on the ground for a few days it ferments and when the monkeys or baboons eat it they get really pissed. Flippen funny to watch.
- jayf, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6Tibetan monkeys do this without the alcohol. They even go down on the sons of the mothers they want to get with though.
- demigod186, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6I read it as "Drunk researchers show that sober humans act like drunk monkeys"
- rebelmessiah, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6Surely a banana daiquiri would be the drink of choice?
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -4/+9Sold!
- mancat, on 10/12/2007, -1/+5you'd think not, but they do.........
bubbles, you said you loved me.
whore!!!!!! - theLEGENDisBACK, on 10/12/2007, -2/+6Do you think the monkeys needed AA after these experiments?
- aaaaabbbbb, on 10/12/2007, -1/+5Great, 1st there was monkeys smoking cigarettes, now there's monkeys getting drunk. What's next, monkeys living in trailer parks and working at walmart?
- giid, on 10/12/2007, -5/+9Why bury the above "Oh yes...drunk dialing is never good." comment? I believe people are digging it down because it's basically a "me too" type comment and doesn't add much, if anything, to the conversation.
- zubi, on 10/12/2007, -2/+5This proves evolution.
- Th3_anOmoLy, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3So, judging by the published study and Pype's study alcohol seems to be the "missing link". Little did we all know that the missing link would work to foward and reverse the evolutionary process.
- TheDrunkMonkey, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4I could have come up with the results of this study by myself (see my name). The majority of the money would go towards getting myself drunk, while the rest might go to an "assistant" who would record the results while we were "multitasking" in a sleezy motel room.
- Odweaver, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4I want to see monkeys after 2 or 3 bottles of Bawls
- cantankerous, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2You think that's odd? Over at the local University they have crack smoking sheep! As for monkeys drinking beer... I'll show you friend who likes getting his dog drunk on weekends. Hows that liver doing pooch?
- Istari6, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Elephants too. I've seen footage of tipsy elephants, after they'd eaten fermented marula fruit. hmmmm.....Amarula
- t3hjoeness, on 10/12/2007, -2/+4I don't see why not. I'm sure monkeys are even cheaper labor than illegal immigrants.
- PrayerNeeder, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3Only if you're uneducated.
This is how it works:
Bob is a high school dropout. He has, however, built a decent business out of a dog breeding & boarding kennel. He feeds one of his dogs beer, and one of his employees records it for future viewing. They play the tape, sees drunk dog acting stupid, and laugh. Another employee finds out & calls 911. Bob is arrested, fined, and publicly humiliated. He makes the Discovery Channel / Animal Planet television show of shameful-naughty-mean-to-animals rotten people. Bob is banned from ever running the business again, at least economically.
Robert has a master's degree in zoology / veterenary science. He feeds a lab monkey beer.
He feeds one of his lab monkeys beer, and one of his lab assistants records it for future viewing. They play the tape, observe drunk monkey acting stupid, and laugh . They record their observations (sans the laughing) and present their fingings to the Government. Robert applies for, and receives, a sizeable government grant. Robert publishes his findings, receives peer recognition for his contributions to science, and is granted a PhD after publishing his thesis, entitled "Monkeys who drink beer get drunk and act stupid." - jer2eydevil88, on 10/12/2007, -7/+8Okay
Take idea...
Force it upon people.
Kill anyone who opposes your new ideas.
Publish scriptures that detail great things to those who share your commitment to your idea.
Create a Religion.
Success! - PrayerNeeder, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1http://www.tcpalm.com/tcp/local_news/article/0,,TCP_16736_4689117,00.html
- Flankk, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Why not just link to your own cam?
*ducks* - Skyhoper, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Damn those monkeys! They get to do everything!
- Flankk, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Your comment was so scrumtrelescent, I can barely move.
- Kitsune818, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I was just about to comment that I remember watching a video in College about monkeys getting bombed on fermented fruit, complete with footage of a staggering primate scored with "How dry I am" :)
- mv10, on 10/12/2007, -4/+5Where are our tax dollars going when we research Drunk Monkeys.. what about the bird flu, cancer, or aids.. lol
- DurangoSteve, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Where is the drunk monkey cam? Somebody please put up a link.
- Flankk, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1"What's next, monkeys living in trailer parks and working at walmart?"
I thought we were already there. - yahoofrom, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I thought the title was about drunk monkeys get the high intelligence of human beings.
- Lucian0, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I too would enjoy seeing a video of monkeys drinking in excess.
- 808kick, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1@tjl2015
good concept but do you really want monkey spit in your joints? - dielawn, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1i should trade my dog for a spider monkey...that way it would be funnier to get it high
- HelterSkelter42, on 06/18/2009, -0/+0I think it's better to say that drunk humans act like monkeys. Lol! I hate to say it but i hate when they are doing all sort of experiments on animals. I know that some scientists tried an addiction treatment on a monkey also... after forcing it to become an alcoholic. Here's the article: http://www.health57.com/addiction-treatment-center ...
-
Show 51 - 80 of 80 discussions
Digg is coming to a city (and computer) near you! Check out all the details on our 
© Digg Inc. 2009
— Content created and posted by Digg users is