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79 Comments
- BicBall, on 10/12/2007, -0/+28wear a condom
- pritch, on 10/12/2007, -0/+25Sod tight fitting swimsuits, I think my favoured technique is the best - stay away from the Amazon.
- willis77, on 10/12/2007, -1/+26no.
urethra is way worse. wayyy worse. - inactive, on 10/12/2007, -4/+27"Beneath you swims the dreaded candiru! A naughty little fish with a penchant for swimming up a man's urethra!"
- rockforever, on 10/12/2007, -12/+32Just another one of Gods great creations right?
- MasterChi, on 10/12/2007, -1/+14"or even in the case of smaller specimens the penis"
Your right it does hurt, why is my size always judged :( - Legato, on 10/12/2007, -0/+13ok, i re-watched the beginning just to make sure, and we both lose
"The dreaded candiru, a naughty little fish with a penchant for swimming up a man's urethra"
the part we were both adding on was cut off by the boys and was picked up at the above quote.
http://scrotalsafetycommission.com/
now that thats settled, dig down - gerry87, on 10/12/2007, -1/+13A fish thats small enough to swim up your penis, may find his way into a cage, unless the holes were tiny, then he wouldn't be able to see where he was going. Unless it was some sort of glass pod, but then it would just be a boat pulling a fool in a glass pod down a river. How about just don't piss in the river.
- nymphetamine, on 10/12/2007, -0/+12It doesn't just affect the guys, but apparently women too:
"It is feared by the natives because it is attracted to urine or blood, and if the bather is nude it will swim into an orifice (the anus or vagina, or even in the case of smaller specimens the penis—and deep into the urethra). "
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candir%C3%BA
It hurts just reading about it. - dougbdl, on 10/12/2007, -0/+10I read about this in the book 'River of Doubt' about Teddy Roosevelt's trip down an unknown tributary in the Amazon. It was an incredible book if you are looking for some interesting reading.
- Wonderkind, on 10/12/2007, -0/+10"Please don't pee in our pool!" takes on a whole new meaning.
- jus1haz2, on 10/12/2007, -4/+13well im never swimming again.
- jcapogna, on 10/12/2007, -0/+9It will any orifice, an anus or a vagina too. Wear a tight fitting swimsuit.
- schroeder, on 10/12/2007, -4/+13Crocodile Hunter: Today we're looking for Candirú. I'm going to pee in this river and see if we can catch one...
RIP - Fredwardio, on 10/12/2007, -0/+9Augh. I was much happier thinking that Venture Bros. made this fish up. I really was.
- Phil246, on 10/12/2007, -0/+8condom and buttplug then.
- marinist, on 10/12/2007, -0/+8Can you say Kevlar Speedo?
- scottylist, on 10/12/2007, -1/+7Did anyone tell the candirú about the Amazon swimmer?
- Akaji, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6Kevlar Spandex.
Crap! - candiru, on 10/12/2007, -1/+7i rock again.
- GawtMilk, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6Her goal is to SWIM the Amazon, not sit in a pod and float.
- shirosamurai, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6"You must get to a hospital before your bladder bursts; you must ask a surgeon to cut off your penis.”
Jesus. The thing is like a time bomb, except instead of cutting wires to stop it you cut your penis -.- - kernokerno, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6you know, the Amazon it's not a Continent, it's a RIVER inside a COUNTRY
- asif5th, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5And I thought dropping the soap was as bad...
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6if i was this guy, i would be wearing a full body suit, covered in electrons, rated at 50 000 volts, and a few grenades attatched to my belt... and have one of my mates with this thing ready http://arstechnica.com/journals/thumbs.ars/2007/1/4/6480
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5Wow... I tip my hat to you sir. You are my better.
- Shrill, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5Hmm... I know the fish is small, but couldn't the guy wear some sort of all body wetsuit? (it's hot in Brazil, but it could be made very lightweight). They have a picture of the Candiru here:
http://www.angelfire.com/mo2/animals1/catfish/candiru.html
It looks big enough that a wetsuit COULD keep it out... probably :) - g3r4, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4And that whole new meaning comes along with a handy punishment that makes for easy enforcement, and it feels pretty close to a nuclear warhead being shoved up your ass and set off. Please enjoy. (No Splashing, Please)
- Krumm, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4Ok, there's biscuit all over my keyboard from the mental image of a fish the size of a trout trying to swim into this blokes weener...
This why I visit Digg! - szembek, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4"Why not use a codom?"
Is he supposed to swim the entire journey with a hard on? - tanasinn, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3Why not use a codom?
- therearenorules, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3@BicBall
I saw your comment and thought "WHAT A GENIUS!" Then jcapogna ruined it for me. - utcursch, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3This guy was wearing an undie, but that didn't help:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSLKZzuLC00 (Youtube video "Parasites - candiru or willie fish") - Dundasbro, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4I thought the problem was that the pencil snapped?
/cringe - mumblingmynah, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2No, it's real. Did you see the straight dope revisit, complete with modern account?
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/010907.html - thelonious, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3I hear about this every couple of years or so and it always comes back to being more of an old legend without any modern records of it happening than some common occurrence. Here's The Straight Dope take on it:
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/000519.html
The bottom line is, I don't think any person who reads this comment will ever have it happen (be it fact or fiction). If it does... sucks to be you I guess. - g3r4, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2What the hell was the guy doing with the pencil that made it snap? Seems like that would be the part that hurt.
- g3r4, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Isn't it Ampulex Compressa? With one "L"? You are of course speaking about the crazy as hell emerald wasp right? I agree in full, its the scariest thing alive with the exception of the little Candiru bastard. (Barring any creature unknown to me, at the moment, which burrows into the scrotum to lay eggs...)
- gdm9000, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Oh, I hate when that happens!
- wolfkeeper, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I think the risks are exagerated a bit. While they do sometimes have to remove the penis, mostly they give you something to drink that acidifies the urine. The fish doesn't like that and it retracts its spines and it can be removed. That usually works.
- afx1, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Check out digg before crashing...nausea ensues.
- livestradamus, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2That is one of the most horrid descriptions, ever
- Aikinai, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Someone else posted this higher, but again, read the later article where he found plenty of proof http://www.straightdope.com/columns/010907.html
- utcursch, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1From the Candiru song (http://www.trollart.com/sound/candiru/index.html)
"Rusty pilers won't do the trick
You'll need the doctor and mighty quick!" - apoc06, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1@ shrill:
that was the most disturbing thing i've read all week; thats saying alot considering ive been here on digg... - utcursch, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Err... the link got messed up -- it's http://www.trollart.com/sound/candiru/index.html -- minus the parenthesis
- greghunt, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I've swam in the Amazon (well one of its many rivers).
I'd be more concerned about the anacondas and alligators, especially since the water is so opaque you can't see more than an inch through it.
That being said, peeing in the river was a bit of a concern, we decided a side to side swinging motion to be the safest. Though one guy in our group went for a piss whilst swimming about, I think that might have been a scary moment in his life :)
Also I didn't meet anybody in South America who had succumbed to the fish, though that doesn't mean much. - sambearpoet, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1There is a really awesome song called "Cruel Spines" by George Hrab that talks about this fish. The song is played acoustically on the PodCulture podcast, let's see where's the URL...
http://media.libsyn.com/media/chroma/PodCulture_021_2006-9-10.mp3
is the file
and
http://podculture.blogspot.com/2006_09_01_archive.html
is the podcast that it's played on.
The song is hilarious! George Hrab is at Geologic Records
http://www.geologicrecords.net/ - BicBall, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1@jcapogna, i didn't say where
- terminalpariah, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Aarrrgh! Time out!
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