What is Digg?72 Comments
- Dokument, on 10/10/2007, -1/+15Everybody knows you first have to get wrist control.
- zaii7, on 10/10/2007, -4/+17#8 call chuck norris
- exoendo, on 10/10/2007, -3/+14dugg for everything except "power of visualization" which sounds pretty dumb.
- anarchytv, on 10/10/2007, -4/+127 Tips for losing an arguement and getting walked all over.
- Enlightenment, on 10/10/2007, -1/+8#8 - Say "wait right there while I get my shotgun".
#9 - Clean your gun during the conversation. - jdh24, on 10/10/2007, -0/+61. Avoid consulting President Bush
- richpav, on 10/10/2007, -1/+5The people who think this is lame advice probably never had the opportunity to work for a difficult boss. Believe me, if you work for the proverbial "bosshole," there's no such thing as winning, because even if you win, eventually, one way or another, that person will see to it that you lose. Some people who end up in high places live by the creed to "win at all costs," and unless you learn to deal with them, believe me, they can make your life complete hell.
From my experience, this is very good advice. And it takes a lot more inner strength and self-control to put it into practice than it does to do what normally comes natural in such situations (i.e. fly into a rage). Try it next time and you'll see what I mean. - dannyboy3020, on 10/10/2007, -3/+7This Chuck Norris ***** will get old after some point.
- fisticuffs, on 10/10/2007, -1/+5The problem with this list is that there are times when certain situations and certain people call for the complete opposite approach. This should be renamed "7 tips for if we lived in an ideal world".
- bromac, on 10/10/2007, -1/+5Sometimes you're wrong, and should get "walked over"
Learn from it. You're not infallible and people will best you occasionally. If you don't learn from those mistakes though, you're going to repeat them. - danomagnum, on 10/10/2007, -1/+5This isn't how to resolve a conflict... It's how to just give up on your side of the argument.
- bromac, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3Wow, I'm getting Dugg down for saying nobody's perfect.
Except you of course. - nitsnipe, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3In a way, thats how many conflicts end up being resolved today
- bromac, on 10/10/2007, -1/+4It takes a man to admit that he's wrong. Being fallible is trait of being human, not a pussy.
Only cowards think they're always right and never lose an argument. - bromac, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3Wow, quadruple post. That's a new record I think.
Oh, and Digg. ***** FIX THIS ALREADY. Why wasn't this addressed in the last revision? - haydesigner, on 10/10/2007, -2/+4I trust you are writing from Kuwait or Iran.
If you are writing from America, than you sir... are an idiot. - mojaam, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2Woah, this is sure to get you killed and disrespected, avoid and go with you guts or something. Learn from your own experience.
- mutwirik, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2"Let the other person do the talking"
Problem is, the other person has read the article too. Stalemate!
At this point use physical means to resolve the conflict - bromac, on 10/10/2007, -1/+3So I guess resolving a conflict means you winning it.
Here's a way to resolving a conflict quicky and easily: be the one to concede, and then go about your business.
It's not always about you being right and convincing other of it. Sometimes its about YOU giving up misconceptions. - bromac, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2Is it really that dumb?
Isn't a common public speaking trick to visualize your audience naked? - verbam, on 10/10/2007, -1/+3I guess half of these just don't apply to my conflicts.
I get even angrier if someone doesn't take part in the argument, or if they pretend to see where I'm coming from, and even worse: pretend they made a mistake.
These tips just create more problems in the future, especially if the person on the other end doesn't mean any of it. - RyanBlueThunder, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2take the poster of babies dressed up as adults and make it into a t-shirt. win-win-win!
- inactive, on 10/10/2007, -4/+68. If first 7 steps fail, punch him/her in the nose. Try and push nose into brain. Conflict over.
- tulpe, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1pickthebrain.com? reminds me of http://www.brainmuseum.org/Specimens/index.html
- unclesaddam, on 10/10/2007, -1/+2Is the point that he's deaf?
Very good read. - cyrillsneer, on 10/10/2007, -5/+6How the hell does this make it to the front page?
This is nothing more than a regurgitation of that little known book by Dale Carnegie. Where is that sarcasm font? - SamPollock, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Flynn, you don't have to be a stubborn jackass all the time.
You could try being nice to someone once and a while and not a ***** bitch.
I don't think that I've ever seen you do a good deed for someone.
That proves that you are just a bastard - mahdaeng, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1FTA: "You’re very angry right now and you’re saying things you don’t mean (give them the benefit of the doubt). I’m going to excuse myself. We can talk again after you calm down."
Yes, but as you're heading for the door, he'll probably throw a brick at the back of your head. - greatargonauts, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1..or we can just settle all arguments by having a duel.
- mrbradg, on 10/10/2007, -0/+11. Remain calm. Be still and say nothing. Let the storm run its course. Often times the angry person wants to provoke you. Arguing is ineffective because it raises barriers. Consider how I handled the barber situation.
2. Let the other person do the talking. He or she will soon grow tired of it. Sometimes that’s all they want. To be heard. To feel important. Everyone wants to feel important. Some people just express it in ways that are counterproductive.
3. Genuinely consider the other person’s point of view. Imagine yourself in his shoes. Never say “you’re wrong.” In fact, try hard to look for areas of agreement and build on them.
4. There’s power in the words “Yes, yes, I see exactly what you’re saying. You mean…….” This shows the other person you hear him/her. That’s all they usually want — to be validated. By agreeing with them, you gradually break down the other person’s anger.
5. If the situation turns verbally abusive, put a stop to it. Firmly but calmly state: “You’re very angry right now and you’re saying things you don’t mean (give them the benefit of the doubt). I’m going to excuse myself. We can talk again after you calm down.” Then leave the room or ask them to leave.
6. If you are wrong, quickly admit it and take responsibility. You could say, “You’re absolutely right, it is my fault and here is what I’ll do to fix it.” Even if you’re NOT wrong, at least give them the benefit of the doubt, “I may be wrong, let’s look at the facts together.” It’s hard to argue with that!
These words have tremendous power. Not only does it validate the other person’s viewpoint but it also diffuses the tension. You might be surprised by what happens afterwards. The person could end up defending you. You’d be amazed how an attacker suddenly becomes an ally.
7. Use the power of visualization. If you’re dealing with someone you interact with on a daily basis (like a boss or co-worker), try to imagine that person as a loving spiritual being. I did this with a boss I had at a Wall Street bank several years ago. He was an absolute tyrant and gave everyone a hard time. In retrospect, he was clearly unhappy and insecure.
One day I started to visualize him as a loving grandfather. When he was in a good mood, he would lovingly talk about his grandchildren. His eyes and face would light up with incredible joy, leading me to realize there was a softhearted man behind the hard facade. Every morning before going to work, I imagined him romping around in the backyard on a warm, breezy day with his grandkids squealing and laughing with delight.
Long story short, this man promoted me almost 1 year later, in no small part due to the power of visualization. No one can dispute that this works because I’ve lived to tell the story. I’ve used it win trips to Mexico and Bermuda (sales contests at Merrill Lynch), to forgive those who have hurt me, to become the world’s first deaf instrument pilot, and to give powerful presentations.
Food for thought: Think about how you’ve dealt with difficult people in the past. Were you tempted to prove them wrong, trying to save face? Were you able to see through the facade and recognize that all they want is to be heard, loved and validated? Have you tried the power of visualization? - tkotam, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Can someone ask Mr. Bush and Mr. Ahmadinejad to freaking read this story? :-)
- babystars232, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Hey mr. poster, you're wrong! dead wrong! ..now apply your new found knowledge to me.
- ps3udov3ctor, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1damn it!
http://www.jasonbartholme.com/2007/05/03/101-ways- ... - silverchrysalis, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1yeah, that's the irony i was trying to portray...
- ThinkBox, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1I'd rather do something that doesn't put me on Death Row
- mavedatthews85, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1"Every morning before going to work, I imagined him romping around in the backyard on a warm, breezy day with his grandkids squealing and laughing with delight."
Uhhh... sure. - chmeee, on 10/10/2007, -2/+3That is an extremely condescending article.Buried for promoting passive-aggression.
- ps3udov3ctor, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Instead dig into this arsenal and you're sure to beat down any cubicle dweller into submission:
http://www.jasonbartholme.com/2007/05/03/101-ways- ... - dearsweetbriar, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1I'm pretty sure SuperWinner was being sarcastic, but thanks for the advice about punching people...captain obvious.
- glinsvad, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Judging from his barber example, I'd say it would be self-defence to put in a little jab.
- FlynnRocks, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1This is the gayest ***** article ever!!!
I would never say some gay things like this.
Stop being such a gay bitch Sam. - friedcalamari, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1Why negotiate when we can settle our differences in a battle?
- bromac, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1Indeed. Don't ever examine your own argument. Just beat the opposition no matter what!
- nitsnipe, on 10/10/2007, -2/+2You make a very good point. Just don't spam because it ruins it.
- GUTTS, on 10/10/2007, -0/+0That would be Texas Ranger Cuck Norris, to you sir!!!
- bromac, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1When somebody beats up Chuck Norris.
Then we'll have a new Champion. - Aniphx, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1This seems tempting to try seeing as how I just got into an argument earlier.
- septicmadman, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1...and an ass, sorry, my apologies.
- bromac, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1Yeah, I was trying to impress people. Not point out that hitting someone usually doesn't end a conflict, but start one.
Unless you knock them out. If you don't, they'll hit you back. I'm sorry, that's just how it works. - nitsnipe, on 10/10/2007, -3/+3This is an interesting article, but I'd also like all the 13 year-olds in digg not to relate this to Bush, Iraq, Ron Paul, Ahmedinejad etc... Otherwise it will look like a YouTube comment flurry.
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