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If You Could Have 8 Videogame Abilities, What Would They Be?

ripten.com — Have you ever wondered what else you could be doing with all the hours you use to play video games? Do you wish that the skills and abilities you learned in video games actually transferred into real life? Here's a list of eight abilities that you may want to consider.

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  • lardoandkeg, on 12/22/2007, -1/+17Number 3 is hilarious.
    • carlnewton, on 12/22/2007, -0/+12I want the ability to see through walls simply by standing in a corner and looking in different directions. I just tried it but got too close and found a glitch - Can anyone help me out of this ***** wall?
      • heavyd14, on 12/22/2007, -0/+2Thats why stealth camo would be so much better.
    • thcobbs, on 12/22/2007, -0/+13Where's the "Double Jump"?
    • stalefries, on 12/22/2007, -0/+2Dammit some elf came in here and broke all my jars! That's where I had all my rupees!

      /badly quoted
  • terencec, on 12/22/2007, -1/+134i would like to have the ability to "save" before an exam... that way i can keep going back to that save file and do good
    • DoodleMaster, on 12/22/2007, -1/+33You're thinking to small man what you do is you save a day before the lottery numbers are drawn write down the numbers go back and buy a ticket and then "money money money"
      • GMorgan, on 12/22/2007, -0/+44Bah this is all small fry stuff. What I want is the level editor for the world, a hex editor for my environment and preferably source code and compiler for the universe. Then the upper hand is on the other foot.
    • choppinbroccoli, on 12/22/2007, -2/+102You should have saved before writing that comment. Then you could have done "well" instead of good.
    • falstaff, on 12/22/2007, -1/+13Unless your life is an early Square game, then you'd have to tediously replay the preceding week of boring study and work before you got back to the test, since that was the closest save point.
      • archer104, on 12/22/2007, -1/+13You would either carry the knowledge of your previous study session and exam with you and not have to study OR you would have no memory of studying and thus it would not be repeating the same stuff but the ability to go back would be pointless.
    • wondertwins, on 12/22/2007, -0/+8i would "save" before i have sex because if there are any complications...
      • Asianwaste, on 12/22/2007, -1/+3Complications? Theres' only 3 choices on the menu: Fight / Item / Run Away
        • SkuLLpHucT, on 12/22/2007, -3/+1No, you forget the infamous "Create child" option.
        • Asianwaste, on 12/22/2007, -1/+3That's what item or the run away command can be used for.
    • rhesuspieces00, on 12/22/2007, -0/+1the problem with save in replay is you would never get anything done. the first time you get laid, you'd just get stuck in an infinite loop replaying the same half hour over and over again.
    • royalwcheese, on 12/23/2007, -0/+1Can I trade all eight for a game genie, or for the younger kids... A gameshark?
    • Dustin00, on 12/23/2007, -0/+1Save and Reload was my very first thought.
  • Jman4183, on 12/22/2007, -0/+25What do you mean? When I throw up my 5th place roller hockey trophy, the chicks come rushing in...just like Fable.
    • elnerdo, on 12/22/2007, -0/+10The hardest part of throwing up my 5th place roller hockey trophy is eating it first.
  • IIIBTW, on 12/22/2007, -0/+15The healing capability with the cheating girlfriend example is so true....I would rather 3 bullets to the face though.
    • DoodleMaster, on 12/22/2007, -4/+3You don't need a video game for that Booze, and a real gun will do it for ya...here ya go!
  • macweirdo42, on 12/22/2007, -1/+63I want the ability to, even if I've got a piano strapped to my back, be able to run like a freakin' madman just so long as I'm currently holding only a knife in my hands. Or say "..." to people and have them consider that an appropriate response. Or, in the middle of work, be able to pause, go home, grab a beer, return to work, unpause, and have it be like I never left. Or never get lost, because I can always tell which way to go because that's the direction all the enemies are coming from. Or in the middle of a battle, simply fire away from the battlefield in order to instantly reload.

    I do NOT, however, want to become immobilized by a knee-high ledge because I can't jump. I don't want to instantaneously die simply because someone I don't like touched me. I don't want the entire world to come to a halt because I haven't talked to the right person yet. Similarly, I don't want to have to spend hours trying to use random objects on other random objects and people before I can move on with my life (I mean, can you imagine the embarrassment of getting a chili cheese dog, and then having to try to use it on every single person you meet on the streets?). I don't want to have the unpleasant situation wherein I accidently saved my progress right before a horribly painful and gruesome death. And I certainly have no interest in having to save the same person's life more than twice.
    • smackhero, on 12/22/2007, -1/+4well, if you want to cheat you can just go to GameFAQs and download a saved game with 100% completed. on a related note, i wish i had a walkthrough for real life.
    • Spoomeister, on 12/23/2007, -0/+6"Similarly, I don't want to have to spend hours trying to use random objects on other random objects and people before I can move on with my life"

      You just described the last 10 years of my career. Thanks a lot. Now I need a drink, presuming I have one in my inventory.
  • unicronband, on 12/22/2007, -0/+75I just want a portal gun. If not, I suppose a gravity gun would suffice.
    • Sornos, on 12/22/2007, -1/+32The portal gun would be able to destroy all life on Earth. Put one portal at sea level, and another in orbit, and all the atmosphere will vent into space. Or even put one portal at the bottom of the ocean and another one on land, and you get a geyser of epic proportions.
      • kevinmotel, on 12/22/2007, -0/+21i think there would be an issue of getting the portals into those locations to begin with.
        • macweirdo42, on 12/22/2007, -1/+7It's simple point and shoot. Get a boat, and go out to sea and just aim the gun at the sea floor. If you want to vent the world's atmosphere, just aim at the Moon. At least, I think that would work.
        • stalefries, on 12/22/2007, -0/+7Ah, but you see, the sea floor isn't flat, so you can't make a portal there. Also, you need a solid surface up in the atmosphere as well.
      • Sinudeity, on 12/22/2007, -0/+9Sure, put a portal at the bottom of the ocean, and another spewing sea water back into the ocean...
        That would be fantastic.
      • AnimZero, on 12/22/2007, -0/+9They really need to add water physics to games.
        • timewarp424, on 12/22/2007, -0/+3Speaking of physics, in real life, I want to be able to jump up and be pulled down by gravity. When I get shot, I want my body to respond to the force of the bullet with rag doll physics and have realistic looking blood. I am sick of the canned motion sequences and half assed blood. That'd be my perfect world.
      • Asianwaste, on 12/22/2007, -0/+3Sorry but your theory is flawed. Portal guns only work on light gray squares only.
    • ssjkakaroto, on 12/22/2007, -2/+3The "enhanced" gravity gun that can even grab people would be more appropriate
    • listrophy, on 12/22/2007, -0/+3P-Wing. Plain and simple.

      Though the constant bell-ringing would get annoying.
    • tektalk, on 12/23/2007, -0/+1Add the ability to automatically re-orient yourself in mid-air, shoot portals into anything large and flat enough,and survive a 2 story jump, then the portal gun would be so much more useful.
  • Nickatnite101, on 12/22/2007, -0/+13I choose the oldest video game power of all time. A Reset Button.... and maybe some Checkpoints...... and Pause.
    • GMorgan, on 12/22/2007, -0/+3You want to reincarnate?

      Pause would be nice though.
    • Asianwaste, on 12/22/2007, -0/+3Captain N used that pause button to get out of so many stupid situations... I just didn't see why he never used it ALL the time.
  • holygram, on 12/22/2007, -1/+7The healing thing is possible in reality, but you can't eat anything that tastes good.
    • chrisbarr, on 12/22/2007, -0/+10But it takes a lot longer in real life. You also don't get a meter to tell you how bad off you are and how many turkeys you must eat to repair the damage.
    • Arramol, on 12/22/2007, -0/+8I hate to break it to you, but those were lima beans, not senzu beans.
  • Itazura, on 12/22/2007, -0/+75Big head mode.
  • truspect0r, on 12/22/2007, -17/+0Ability to RRoD my enemies!
    • B1663r, on 12/22/2007, -1/+3Ahh just an imitation of the real deal. Will the real truspector please stand up?
  • jzungre, on 12/22/2007, -2/+42i am so down with the portal gun and the being able to pause. or slow mo like max payne

    Here's one i left out:

    hit points going up: At the end of an RPG you can withstand 20x more damage than when you started. At the end of my gym membership, i'd like my skin to be like kevlar.
  • bjarkebech, on 12/22/2007, -2/+34noclip.
    • TomTruelle, on 12/22/2007, -0/+10noclip + iddqd = epic bank robbery
  • ps2pers0n, on 12/22/2007, -6/+0Buried as inaccurate. #6 does work in real life.
    • Asianwaste, on 12/22/2007, -0/+2Your 2nd Place Spelling Bee trophy fails to convince me
  • dericko, on 12/22/2007, -0/+5I was thinking along the lines of bullet time and rocket jumping... =P
  • archiethefifth, on 12/22/2007, -0/+9Extra lives ftw.
  • JimXugle, on 12/22/2007, -16/+51) Teleport
    2) Hearth
    3) Blink
    4) Make Water
    5) Make food
    6) Frost Nova
    7) Frostbolt
    8) Ice Barrier

    Hi, My name is Vlastul, I'm a level 56 Human Frost Mage.
    • Dylson, on 12/22/2007, -2/+24Don't do that.
    • ronaldmonster, on 12/22/2007, -0/+5Not funny
    • TheKrillr, on 12/22/2007, -2/+2Totally what i was thinking... but screw hearth. toss fireball in there.

      hi, im Kazu, i'm a level 70 gnome mage.
      • JimXugle, on 12/23/2007, -0/+1Huh... the armory has you pegged at level 14...
        • TheKrillr, on 12/23/2007, -0/+1private blizzlike server. i stopped paying a while ago. havent had the money.
    • OnionBaggage, on 12/22/2007, -0/+4You're only level 56, you shut up now and go grind.
  • judicar, on 12/22/2007, -0/+19respawn
    • Asianwaste, on 12/22/2007, -0/+1Yea but eventually it'll get tiresome and you'll want to quit
  • TRUEPATRIOT, on 12/22/2007, -0/+22respawn.but with ability to choose my spawn points.
  • johnhummel, on 12/22/2007, -1/+14I'd want the one that all the guys in those hentai PC games have - which seems to be the power of attracting masses of hot women who want to check out "the magic pocky".

    Uh - I'll have to hope my wife doesn't check digg today. *cough*
  • bigbill780, on 12/22/2007, -3/+12Killing hookers to get your money back after the deed is done in the park. -GTA 3
    • chrisbarr, on 12/22/2007, -0/+41this actually is possible in real life, but not recommended.
  • moo113, on 12/22/2007, -0/+7I want an unlimited inventory.
  • tattertech, on 12/22/2007, -1/+37The first time I went paintballing about a month ago, I thought about trying bunny hopping across the field. In the end, I'm glad I reconsidered.
  • Gradoner, on 12/22/2007, -15/+1this is like a cool list, but then it's really gay. your girlfriend break up with you? feel better via Call of Duty healing! gay
    • solidus636, on 12/23/2007, -1/+2Maybe you're just gay.
    • Roland1232, on 12/23/2007, -1/+2No way, can't you see how he makes fun of gays? He must be straighter than all of us combined.
      • Gradoner, on 12/24/2007, -0/+1ya I'm making fun of gays because I use a word in a manner that it is commonly used, i guess you can try to be ironic fagots but really, who cares?
  • Dylson, on 12/22/2007, -0/+40God mode.
    • smackhero, on 12/22/2007, -0/+6IDDQD, IDKFA, IDSPISPOPD
      • Dylson, on 12/22/2007, -0/+2I see your point, but I think god mode is great.
    • DarkSamus, on 12/22/2007, -1/+2nah, i don't want my supervisor to be impossible to kill
    • Cruelapollo, on 12/22/2007, -0/+2I would prefer Super or Hyper Sonic with infinite rings. As long as you don't get crushed or fall into any endless pits you'll be fine.
  • mrmacky, on 12/22/2007, -0/+15Gravity Gun, Portal Gun, run fast with knife.

    Maybe a developer console to my life would be nice.
    sv_maxlifespan 1000
    • TheKrillr, on 12/22/2007, -0/+5that last line is so... UNREAL!

      hahaha ya.... im an idiot.
  • tymme, on 12/22/2007, -1/+14First thing I thought of was "turn into a brick wall a la A Boy and His Blob". Allo ladies' shower room.
    I must be a perv. (And a pretty pathetic one, apparently.)
  • krisscofield, on 12/22/2007, -2/+10Can I have Alyx Vance...?
  • nikomo, on 12/22/2007, -7/+1I'd rather have Divine Shield from WoW..
    BEING INVULNERABLE TO ANYTHING WOO
  • MWeather, on 12/22/2007, -1/+8I only need one: iddqd
  • gcnaddict, on 12/22/2007, -0/+18I'd like the ability to give myself more than 100+ of any item I choose simply by catching some retarded-looking interdimensional critter while surfing up and down the shore of some random island.
    • Kingmichael, on 12/22/2007, -0/+8You're not supposed to catch it. If you do that, you could screw up your save file in RL.
    • TheKrillr, on 12/22/2007, -0/+6missingno for the win.
    • Cutter20, on 12/23/2007, -1/+2What the hell game is that?
  • Maloney, on 12/22/2007, -1/+7i would just get all the bioshock things so i could enrage george w. bush
  • Sandman3G, on 12/22/2007, -0/+4A Life Genie.
  • Maloney, on 12/22/2007, -8/+2i just want all the bioshock things so i could enrage george w. bush
  • bstew22, on 12/22/2007, -2/+22I want to eat flowers and shoot fireballs.... the neighbors would be so pissed.
  • luet, on 12/22/2007, -0/+4Saving. For sure. Saving is entirely worth everything I have. Either that or shooting star bits.
  • ShyGuy91284, on 12/22/2007, -0/+2I'd have to say inhaling my enemies and either spitting them out or taking their abilities would sound pretty nice....
    • macweirdo42, on 12/22/2007, -0/+11Most of my enemies have only one power, the power to be a complete douche bag. I don't want that.
  • Legolover64, on 12/22/2007, -0/+18missingno glitch

    you KNOW you'd want it
  • lowerlogic, on 12/22/2007, -0/+1I'd like to wall hack in RL.
  • AdmiralJimbob, on 12/22/2007, -0/+0Wallhack, please.
  • someone173406, on 12/22/2007, -1/+7One word: Gameshark.
  • AWooWoo, on 12/22/2007, -0/+6I would just want Life to be like GTA San Andreas

    steal what cars,planes,helicopters,and any emergency vehicle I want
  • omgwthlol, on 12/22/2007, -0/+1true that
  • Sinudeity, on 12/22/2007, -0/+4Bullet time!
  • PixelEater, on 12/22/2007, -1/+2Suck n' blow, Kirby style.
    • Puppetfunk, on 12/22/2007, -0/+12That's funny because your mom already has that ability and she's maxed the level on it. I guess it's not genetic.
  • M1N3R, on 12/22/2007, -0/+2Altaïr's skills, who doesn't want to kill with a spike that comes out where your ring finger should be
  • festizian, on 12/22/2007, -0/+9You can basically pick out the best video game abilities all from KOTOR
    1. The Force
    2. Persuasion
    3. Strength
    4. Charisma
    5. Security
    6. Ability to save anywhere and create multiple saves
    7. Ability to have your own interstellar ship
    8. Ability to make weird cat women fall in love with you (Juhani was BANGIN)
    • Puppetfunk, on 12/22/2007, -0/+7If you have the Force you can use said force to persuade people, and if you can persuade people what's the point in Charisma?
    • Malchus89, on 12/22/2007, -1/+0Maybe get rid of Juhani.....never liked her.... replace it with demolitions.
  • zombinate, on 12/22/2007, -3/+01: Best Enemies with Yo-Yo (goonies 2)
    2: smash bricks with bare hands (mario bros)
    3: temporarily fly because I am dressed like a raccoon
    4: Babality!
    5: be rewarded for hitting other vehicles (burnout)
    6: be able to block grevious bodily damage by simply backing away from the assailant
    7: Indestructible as long as I am carrying rings
    8: Ability to distort rules of life so that I can shoot through walls, killing enemies before I am seen
    9: Collect wealth of kings by collecting money conveniently left in vases strewn over villages
    10: Haiduken!
  • windandstorm, on 12/22/2007, -0/+1Portal Gun!
  • JonTheGoose, on 12/22/2007, -0/+22"Aw man i wish i hadn't gotten hammered and slept with that indonesian transvestite..."

    *Reload previous save point*
  • HimThatSpeaks, on 12/22/2007, -0/+7# 1 video game ability that I want - make a ton of money every Christmas season. Whether I am good or not.
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