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Covers That Still Suck: Worst Videogame Box Covers Ever

1up.com — Bad videogame covers are an inescapable blight. They've been with us since we first crawled, naked and blinking, from the primordial seas, and they'll be with us when we finally take to the stars. We can't fight them, but we can at least laugh at them.

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  • tjClassic82, on 05/10/2008, -14/+9I love the Pure Pinball cover! That would make me buy the game over all of the other pinball games on the rack!
    • FuckXboxx, on 05/10/2008, -1/+1I love A Perfect Circle and 13th Step.
  • Agenda, on 05/10/2008, -3/+28Those Space Pirates are bad-ass.
  • MikeonTV, on 05/10/2008, -22/+66sorry 1up. I'm not giving you 5 page views.
    • Blah_Blah_Blah, on 05/10/2008, -5/+7I thought the list was pretty entertaining and clicking next and waiting 2 seconds to read more wasn't that big of a deal. I think one huge page of everything looks unprofessional anyway, but that's just me. It's kind of silly to boycott an article for a reason like that...
    • Jones82, on 05/10/2008, -2/+5It's not that big of a deal, you just click and wait like 3 seconds and the covers are pretty funny
    • BruceAnderson, on 05/10/2008, -1/+2@MikeonTV - you didn't miss anything. The covers are mostly recent and all pretty lame, but they're not the "Worst Videogame Box Covers Ever" as promised. I've seen far, FAR worse covers than these. There wasn't a single Atari 2600 or Odyssey 2 cover in the lot, which makes this article inaccurate.
      • YoctoYotta, on 05/10/2008, -1/+1I look forward to your article, PM me when you're done.
  • skennedy, on 05/10/2008, -6/+1I love the Kirby example. All they do is tilt his eyebrows down for the U.S. to make him a badass.
    • radsprack, on 05/10/2008, -0/+4You forgot a key word there. "All they do is tilt his eyebrows down for the U.S. to [TRY] to make him a badass."
  • soundsofreason, on 05/10/2008, -4/+41Phrases to add to vocabulary:

    "They're the gayest gays that ever gayed a gay."

    "The day we're treated to a wrestling game that features one enormous guy versus swarms of Lilliputian wrestlers is the day I start buying them."

    "WAAAUGHBLBLBLBL!"
    • insllvn, on 05/10/2008, -0/+6My favorite new phrase is: "[It] is like putting a "Beware of Dog" sign in front of your hamster cage after your hamster already died of being a pussy."
  • KingLeo, on 05/10/2008, -3/+50Half of those are not bad. It's all in the eye of the beholder.
  • BrainCoder, on 05/10/2008, -8/+1This article lacks of really bad covers. Like Mega Man, Mega Man 2, Bomber Man, Street Fighter The Movie, Tommy Lasorda Baseball, Ironsword W&W II , Luigi's Mansion ,Great Giana Sisters , and many others
    • skennedy, on 05/10/2008, -1/+14Those have already been done in the previous worst covers features on 1up -- and just about every other gaming site.
  • hardcorerikki, on 05/10/2008, -1/+3How about Golden Axe 1 for the megadrive ?
  • loganhid, on 05/10/2008, -13/+1This is the Worst Game Cover of All Time

    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/85/Anti ...

    • RoboHobo, on 05/10/2008, -1/+4404: Cover not found.

      You're right. That is a pretty ***** cover.
  • sholmes1019, on 05/10/2008, -8/+2Please... Everybody knows the worst box art of all time is from Ico (North American version):

    http://www.mobygames.com/images/covers/large/10031 ...

    The actual game, on the other hand, is one of the best of all time.
  • Bombfrog, on 05/10/2008, -0/+8Yep, US version of ICO gets my vote.
  • Verz, on 05/10/2008, -28/+15Digg me up so I can feel good.



    :D
    • Zarokima, on 05/10/2008, -0/+2That's what having a girlfriend is for. Or masturbation.
  • onionbagel724, on 05/10/2008, -0/+3i like all of them. if you don't take them so seriously I think they are all kind of funny. Especially the space pirate one, I want a poster of that.
  • poontangpirate, on 05/10/2008, -0/+15How about...BASIC PROGRAMMING! THE VIDEO GAME!
    http://www.geekstir.com/pictures/the-most-intense- ...
    • Wakkyweed, on 05/10/2008, -0/+0Wow - okay, that is the most craptastic looking video game ever! Just think though, in 100 years it will probably be a valuable collectible due to it's extreme rarity.
    • PabloIV, on 05/10/2008, -0/+1So this "game" was literally programing in basic. I remember being like 5 or 6 and thinking hey "What's this interesting game with space controls that I have never played?", putting it in and wondering what the hell I was supposed to do.
  • merripen, on 05/10/2008, -1/+44Megaman was just robbed of that #1 spot.
    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ea/Mega ...
    • imikedaman, on 05/10/2008, -1/+4They already covered Mega Man in a previous article. If you notice, this is their *fourth* list of bad game covers.
      • ace429k, on 05/10/2008, -0/+5its bad enough that it needs to be included in EVERY list that talks about bad game covers.
    • TruthKid, on 05/10/2008, -0/+2"How are the bulges gay robot"
      "tasty"
      • merripen, on 05/10/2008, -0/+2Things I didn't expect to read today...
  • gamben0, on 05/10/2008, -4/+2I'm getting the feeling that 1up is employing 4 year olds to write articles to attract people (who dont use adblock) to look at ads.
  • AppleGeorge, on 05/10/2008, -5/+17Anybody who doesn't know who Sting is should be shot.
  • Digitoad, on 05/10/2008, -1/+2Umm... Splatterhouse 2 has the BEST box cover ever.
    • diothar, on 05/10/2008, -0/+3Anybody notice that they had its publish date as 2008?
    • gl77, on 05/10/2008, -0/+4splatterhouse 2 release date....2008???? sega???? genesis???? 16 bit cartridge???? 2008???
      /head aspldoes
  • mattwalton56, on 05/10/2008, -4/+18Too. Many. Pages.
    • mattwalton56, on 05/10/2008, -6/+1Well, actually, I should have said 'for' many pages...

      Buh Dun Tch
  • playuhh, on 05/10/2008, -3/+2#diggs is inversely proportional to #pages.used
  • imacbook, on 05/10/2008, -8/+2I vote GTA 4 to this too. What are they thinking? I bought the game and it looked NOTHING like the cover.

    The cable cars are actually round, not square and the draw distance is WAY less than it appears on the box too.
    • choopie911, on 05/10/2008, -0/+1It's stylized...that's the point....
      • ace429k, on 05/10/2008, -1/+1they have all they're covers like that.
  • philliesphan026, on 05/10/2008, -0/+9Kirby Air Ride:
    "The angry face is like putting a "Beware of Dog" sign in front of your hamster cage after your hamster already died of being a pussy."

    I literally l laughed out loud when I read that. Dugg
  • Diderotten, on 05/10/2008, -2/+59The Orange Box should be exempt from the list. First of all, it doesn't look that bad. Second of all, it's a collection. What did they expect them to do? have Gordon freeman interact with the characters from the different games in some bizarre illustration?
    • choopie911, on 05/10/2008, -2/+14According to their ***** attempt at being funny, they expected the box art to fully explain every game contained in the collection, and the nature of the characters on the box. That wouldn't look terrible or cluttered at all. This whole "article" was just terrible, and had a couple fine designs in there, because the author apparently doesn't know *****.
      • Jones82, on 05/10/2008, -1/+1C'mon, a lot of those were hilarious
    • spankr, on 05/10/2008, -2/+9Indeed - Buried as "Inaccurate" for Orange Box inclusion.
      • endlessoul, on 05/10/2008, -0/+1Buried as LAME because of MrBabyMan.
    • teesix, on 05/10/2008, -8/+2And the Orangebox fanboys rear their heads... dun dun dun
      • choopie911, on 05/10/2008, -1/+6It has nothing to do with being a fanboy or not, it has to do with box-art and design. The inclusion of Orange Box on this list was pretty stupid, regardless of the quality of the game, or whether you enjoy it.
    • SharkyTech, on 05/11/2008, -0/+1I don't know, Gordon Freeman beating the Heavy to death with the Companion Cube could have looked pretty awesome...
  • InuX, on 05/10/2008, -3/+2I only wish this was a cover http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/03/Ayba ...
  • SonnyJoeFoxx, on 05/10/2008, -0/+21What about PHALANX for the SNES? "The hyper-speed shoot-out in space" with an old prospector strumming a banjo on the cover.
    It's just asking to be a desktop wallpaper. http://www.themeparkreview.com/forum/files/605411- ...
  • DariusMonsef, on 05/10/2008, -3/+5Articles split up in to multiple pages just to make some more banner ad money... still suck.
    • chazuk, on 05/10/2008, -0/+3How many times do people have to tout the advantages of adblock plus?
  • AmericanCynic, on 05/10/2008, -0/+3Bust a move looks like he can't crap, or he just finished rubbing one out.
    • Rodalli, on 05/10/2008, -0/+2Funny how, universally, those are the same faces.
  • Strife67, on 05/10/2008, -0/+2what?!?! where do you leave Intellivision's Slam Dunk Super Pro Basketball?!??!
    http://image.com.com/gamespot/images/bigboxshots/7 ...
  • choopie911, on 05/10/2008, -2/+3Wow this is terrible, it left out tons of horrible covers, and why was orange box included? Not only was the choice of orange box poor, their attempt at mocking it with the paragraph underneath was weak at best.
    • choopie911, on 05/10/2008, -0/+3Now that I've read all of them, scratch my previous comment, nearly all the writing was just terrible.
  • rblancarte, on 05/10/2008, -0/+13Dude - not even close (inaccurate)
    http://xbox.ign.com/articles/776/776392p1.html
  • OneEyeJack, on 05/10/2008, -1/+2i don't think they did their research very well, they didn't even have Shaq Fu
    http://multiplayerblog.mtv.com/wp-content/migratio ...
  • marik297, on 05/10/2008, -0/+7Ico.

    and the Orange Box isn't THAT bad.
  • flare1028us, on 05/10/2008, -0/+3I wonder if a Japanese re-make of Cowboy Kid would be worth the hippatte.
  • aceakm, on 05/10/2008, -1/+3Some of those weren't that bad and the writer of the article seems like a douchebag.
  • gquicho, on 05/10/2008, -6/+2Dugg for MrBabyMan.
  • Whadabala, on 05/10/2008, -0/+3That's like a ***** version of Cracked.
  • HumanRecall, on 05/10/2008, -7/+4TNA Impact!
    System: PS2 | Release Date: 2008 | Publisher: Midway
    I'm probably still just bitter that every time I see this title, I expect it to be a revolutionary new sport in which women attack each other exclusively with their breasts and buttocks. Then I remember that such a game exists, that it was called Dead or Alive Xtreme, and that I didn't like it very much.

    But this pretty well perfectly epitomizes everything not to like about the covers of wrestling games. Wide-eyed guy about to punch you? Check. Crazy-looking jerk with KISS makeup? Check. Fat guy who looks like he just kind of randomly wandered into the shot on his way from the sauna? Well, that's new, anyway. My favorite part, though, is the tiny man about to elbow-drop the bald guy's skull. The day we're treated to a wrestling game that features one enormous guy versus swarms of Lilliputian wrestlers is the day I start buying them.


    SOUNDS TO ME LIKE A WRESTLING /TNA HATER/ WWE MARK !!!

    It's a wrestling game for petes sake whats it supposed to have on their other than the mani cast of characters ?

    A ***** DOG EATING IT's SELF ?

    BTW the guy in KISS MAKE UP as you put it is the ICON WRESTLER 'STING" and thats CROW MAKE up !! NOT KISS MORON !!

    And everybody who's eanybody knows WTF KURT ANGLE is !! DOUCHE BAG MUNCHER !!# !!
    • yellowfish04, on 05/10/2008, -1/+3whoa, chill dude. seriously, breathe.
    • TruthKid, on 05/10/2008, -1/+6your emotionally charged comment leads me to believe you are either:

      A. A TNA wrestler
      B. The guy who is responsible for the creation of that game
      C. 12
    • davdw001, on 05/10/2008, -1/+1Somebody needs some T&A...
    • TheTjalian, on 05/10/2008, -0/+2I lol'd at the guy who thought Booker T was bald though. Booker has dreads down to his shoulders!
    • HumanRecall, on 05/11/2008, -0/+1Actually ball lickers i helped film footage on TNA and the wrestlers for MIDWAY GAMES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Sorry if i take offense to some dumb ***** along with diggtards who craps on a product for being what it is !! As i stated what else is a wrestling game cover supposed to look like ? ..........Tell please? Is it supposed to be cartoons, guys shooting each other - an empty ring set up ?
  • Cornrider, on 05/10/2008, -0/+2Whoever wrote the article is weak and trying to look for things where they weren't exactly hiding. I see nothing wrong with the orange box. Who doesn't know who "the nerd" is unless they just started using a PC say, this morning?
  • Data33, on 05/10/2008, -0/+2Uhhh, I think this one qualifies for this article:
    http://cinemassacre.com/Movies/Nes_Nerd/Cart_Scans ...
  • nytejade, on 05/10/2008, -2/+1Seems like he was really reaching on some of those. Not all of them were bad. There's absolutely nothing wrong with the Orange Box's cover design, or Okami's. Okami has an amazingly designed cover, and putting it on the list just because some douchebag on the team made a mistake is REALLY pretentious.

    Sorry, buried as lame, especially since Fabio's game cover debut isn't on the list: http://www.gamewad.com/gw_images/worst_game_covers ...
  • mattysan, on 05/10/2008, -1/+4Aren't you guys forgetting one?

    http://img.qj.net/uploads/articles_module/88797/1. ...
  • mattysan, on 05/10/2008, -1/+2You can't forget Ninja Golf!

    http://img.qj.net/uploads/articles_module/88797/1. ...
  • nytejade, on 05/10/2008, -5/+1Seems like this guy was really reaching on some of these. There's absolutely nothing wrong with the Orange Box's cover design, or Okami's. In fact, Okami's cover design is amazing. Just because some idiot on the team made a dumb mistake doesn't automatically qualify it for this type of list.

    Buried as lame, especially since Fabio's game cover debut wasn't on the list. Putting Orange Box on there before this blows my mind. http://www.i-mockery.com/bad-albums/fabio/ironswor ...
  • farfegnugen, on 05/10/2008, -0/+7Buried for 5 pages and MrBabyMan
  • ace429k, on 05/10/2008, -0/+1wheres the megaman one?! this list isnt complete without creepy CP loving megaman cover.
  • FuckXboxx, on 05/10/2008, -1/+1Orange Box has so much ***** ownage that it doesn't need a cover. It's the Chuck Norris of covers.
  • punchinelli, on 05/10/2008, -4/+1I'm surprised - no mention of U R MR GAY

    http://www.destructoid.com/elephant//ul/44806-mrga ...
  • BlackJackJester, on 05/10/2008, -0/+2Reads like a maddox article, without any good jokes.
  • JulyZerg, on 05/10/2008, -0/+1ARG! Evil layout with 4 pages! MY EYES!
    Why can't anyone seem to design a smart page anymore?
  • Faap, on 05/10/2008, -0/+0Does the druid game let you moonfire spam?
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