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58 Comments
- cogent_bob, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4I've always said, a friend is someone who will help you move.
A TRUE friend is someone who will help you move.... a body. - TRUEPATRIOT, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2http://digg.com/users/doodirock2/submitted
so do you work for 2old2play? or a gigantic fan trying to get people to your site? - doodirock2, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Its hard to say. I have met a bunch of friends online, and many of them I actually hung out with in person. I have crashed on their couches and eaten their food. So I think that in the end you need that physical friendship to solidify it. Still i think you can easily start a friendship online. There are plenty of friends that no longer live near me that I speak with only on the phone. Since they are never physically there I don't think it makes them any less of a friend.
- Massif, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1All of you are my friends...right? RIGHT!?! *cries*
- lokai, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1People online are just people to talk to; they are no replacement for friends and should not be considered true friends. It is not possible to truly know individuals when all communication occurs only through telephone or internet. Physical interaction of some sort is necessary to justify a friendship. Communication alone is not enough to base a valued relationship on.
It is certainly possible to start a friendship over the internet, but to consider persons with whom one chats as friends seems a little off to me.
There are a lot of people that I talk to online; they are not my friends. My friends are there for me when I need them, actually go to bars, games, and social events with me, know my family and actually care about me. People online can really only provide for discussion, and there is no way to know how sincere they are. - linksyslover, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1The only difference I have is that I call them by their gamertags which freaks a lot of people out.
- kprime1988, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1well, i have some friends online and some friends offline of which if you notice i call them "Friends" even though some of them can be real numbnuts meh choose to call em a friend if you want they are people too they have feelings
- orphenshadow, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1My story is alot nicer, it started out with the four hoursemen, me and 3 buddies, in real life, who played RTCW together on the weekends, and halo during off times.. One day we were all hanging out at a coffie shop, and well we werent there yet, but when we arrived to do our normal coffie and smoke break. we noticed like 20 computers set up, and there was a LAN party going on.. before the only lan parties we ever attended was just us 4.. we joined the group, a local gaming lan group made alot of friends. I ultimatly became the leader of the group, along with the original founder. we flourished thanks to bfv, and css... Then we had a falling out. the original leader wanted to keep the community under lock and key and play god, so i just said, okay im not putting friends behind a game, so i stepped down stopped doin lan parties and hanging out. within weeks over 80 percent of the members as well as about 15 ppl who i consider close friends, all in the tulsa area, were asking me if i was starting a new site. so i did. We since merged with another lan group based in chicago, and now have a flourishing online communit of people i have known for over 4 years online, and some for a decade offline. I will admit, there are some people online i wouldnt invite to my home, but there are also the same types in real life. But there are some i would trust with my life. The fact that they live across the ocean, or state line, does not change the fact that people online are people.
- FadeIntoBlack, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1When real life gets you down, your friends are the ones who lift you up, online or offline. Makes no difference.
- maliciousintent, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Its, like you said if you trust someone then your friendship is on solid ground. I believe that the most important part of any relationship is communication, without it the friendship falls apart. I have to dissagree with exaviger however, because you do meet new people online, not in a physical manner, but they are a new entity to you, its then up to those individuals to develop some type of friendship.
dugg - j0keR, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I've pretty much been talking to the same people online for almost two years now. For about a year of that time it was non-stop. Every day all of us would get online and talk either in Ventrilo or Teamspeak, and then probably play some sort of game together. A few of us have tried to meet up in person, a few already know each other, some live less than 20 minutes away and still haven't met. I would say that yes, we are friends.
"The only difference I have is that I call them by their gamertags which freaks a lot of people out."
True. I find myself doing the same thing, but we all know each other's real name and geographic location. We sometimes like to laugh and talk about things that have happened in the past. Getting everybody together in real life as often as we do online would be impossible. The other thing to consider is that people tend to not open up as much as they do in real life. The truth is that even if some of the people I know online went to my school, I probably wouldn't even take the time to talk to them.
"but there would never be as much trust of an online friend as there is with someone you know"
Ah, yes there is. You just have to have talked to them long enough. - orphenshadow, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1
Also since there is no edit, our site is clanspot.net.
And yes, we call each other by our callsigns in public.. and some of us have even went to dinner and joked about just changing our names in real life... i mean, both orphen, and shadow, would be cool names dont you think? - exaviger, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I dont mean this in a bad way but arent people replacing online friends with real friends just an escape from actually trying to meet people?
I think a ballance of the two is needed. - PlaidPhantom, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1GeneHACKman: It's more that people are making friends IN SPITE OF these people.
- xNaquada, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1This is probably the most mature comment section I've ever read on digg. And even it has its kids making 1 line generalizations.
Good for digg. Didnt read the story, but read the comments, good enough for a +digg - 404notfound, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Once the article mentioned talking to "gamer friends" over the phone, the point was weakened. Phone conversations are a pretty big step closer to being a "real friend" and not just somebody you know over the internet. At that point, it would be hard to say that they're still just a "gamer friend." I was hoping it would delve more into what it would be like knowing somebody for many years without so much as having heard their voice before (though then it would have to be "internet friend" in general and not "gamer friend," since so many games rely on voice communication these days).
- vermin, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Agreed, might as well lock her up lest she make any friends at all!
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1I wouldn't want my wife to be making "real friends" through video games. Their are a lot of lonely pron addicted guys playing those games.
- vermin, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Most online friends are in there own category of 'online friends'. So it's not the same as real life friends. And it's not just a distance thing, I have plenty of online friends who are in the same city as me, but I don't ever hang out with them. That said, some online friendships can grow into more. I've gotten laid meeting a girl online.
- antdude, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I usually classify friends has close or distance friends.
- serra, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I also have different classifications for people, online friends and real life friends. My online friends, I'll probably never see. I value them just as much as other friends, but I don't see talk to them as often and I probably won't ever see them in person.
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http://fuh-q.com - twistedcaboose, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1Lokai and everyone-
This article was actually a post from my blog, http://womangamer.blogspot.com, submitted to the site for publishing. There are many different levels of friendship. I have some gaming buddies from 2old2play, I have acquaintances and I have "real friends", all from XBL or 2old2play.com.
Lokai, why does physical contact have to come into play. Are you telling me that a male friend of yours is more sincere than my online friends? Really. I know they like me for who I am because there is no physical aspect involved. Can you say that about your male/female friends? Do you know that when they are looking at you that they are sincere, or are they thinking about getting into the pants? Are you Miss Cleo, can you read minds? These people are there for me and I for them, meeting them in person only strengthens the friendship. - hoodwinked, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0this is such a sweet article
it make me happy thinking about all my css friends - investr, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Believe it our not, hosting CS and BF2 for the last 4 years, has made us quite a nice following. My buddies and I have been bearing the costs until 4 months ago when we asked for donations. We were stunned. We hit our donations in just 2 weeks. Now we plan to add another server and continue to make it a better experience. We would invite anyone to come play!
http://3guns.com - gh3tto, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I've had more "real-life" friends move away and never call me than gamer friends stop using MSN and never say hi. It's also nice to know you have a place to crash in cities all over the country just because you developed a gaming friendship with people over the years.
Just a thought - IHaveIssues, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0C'mon! Basement dwelling geeks need SOME socialization. Doing it anonymously with a headset while asking 'how much manna do you have?' is perfectly acceptable for these people - I mean do you really want to see them out in public???
- abstraxion, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Vemin:
How do you know that ohgr even plays MMORPGs? I know I don't, yet I still know that I know a lot of ***** sociopaths that do. In fact my ex played WoW and it was really quite disgusting how often she played. - BigUncleMike, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I agree I have made friends on-line and I do not separate them when i say i was talking to a friend of mine. There the same. Great article.
- gabangel, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Interesting article, I skipped it for a while thinking that it'd be just another one talking about "oooh, the dangers of online interaction" ... whatever.. So this was a nice change of perspective. :)
I think she's right on the money too. - zimm, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1A friend will pick you up from jail.
A good friend will bail you out of jail.
And a best friend will be in the cell with you saying "man i cant believe we did that!" - pgiger, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Why not, how do we define "friendship"?
- falcyn, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0"I don't plan on ever getting to know any of you guys.... unless you're 5'6" 120LBs or below, brunette with nice titties and you live near by
I have maybe two or three friends I still occasionally talk to that I have yet to meet in person... all female of course."
Now, you realize that by saying that, especially on top of the CS/MMORPG talk you gave, you let us make a pretty safe assumption that you're one of the basement-dwelling, acne-ridden, overweight 20-somethings living in their parents basement that you so seem to hate? 'Cause, going by your rules, you must be. - xelloss, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I have online friends, I play Xbox live with RL friends more then online friends, I play MMORPGs with RL and online friends, its all good, but there would never be as much trust of an online friend as there is with someone you know, (and know you could woop there ass if they did something lol)
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Pure denial.
- inajeep, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Where else would I find 100 people to play with? My online friends/contacts make gaming more enjoyable. If you don't have a large friends list, join a online forum for adult gamers, there are a bunch of them, just check out that site. The group I belong to has get togethers when possible but since everyone is scattered over the US, Canada and a few in the UK it's. Great positive article digg it.
- Nidobolt, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Interesting article; it's a good read. Lots of interesting comments as well.
I don't know really. I tend to "chat" more with people I haven't met in person. People we meet online are easier to talk to because they don't care what you look like or how you lead your life. I guess it can be a bad thing and a good thing at the same time... - hsteel, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I think it comes down to different levels of friendship - with online friends there's often less commitment there, but also less hassle / chance for dissapointment. With real-life friends there's generally more little annoyances but also more trust and transparency.
I'm also not surprised people are starting to make more new friends online than they are in real life. People seem to have a tendency, once they have their family and a few good friends around them, to stop looking for new friends. So for someone who's short on time like the article author, and has specific non-mainstream interests (particularly in a work environment gaming is still considered non-mainstream I think, unless you're lucky enough to work at a game studio), it makes sense to be looking for new friends online. There's already common ground there from the start, and acceptance, which is often a lot more than you'll get meeting a new person for the first time in real-life.
I think it really just comes down to a numbers game - you can go out every week with an existing friend and try and meet new friends by association, but how many of them are you going to hit it off with, and then also have something to sustain the friendship (similar interests, etc)? Why not just go straight to the source, to a community of people who already love what you love. - orphenshadow, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Exactly, the guys in my clan are just as much friends as the guys i grew up with. I trust them with my life. both in game and out. I have alot of friends off line as well, actually over half the clan were offline friends before the clan.
It boils down to intrests, and meeting people.. You walk down the street, you meet someone you say hi, you have no idea what they are interested in, you join a gaming clan you talk to people every night, you obviously both enjoy the same games. this leeds to just shooting the breeze alot of times, and you tend to learn alot about each other.
Not to say everyone has the same luck. I mean there are some completly wierdo's out there. but after about 3 years of knowing someone.. you can weed them out.. Most of the guys i have not met in person i have seen on numerous occasions, they will send pictures of parties and events, when the chicago guys have a lan party we get to see the pic's and vice versa, Actually this years quakecon will be the first of our new tradition..
Were spending 4 days at quake con, gaming, then 4 days with no internet/computers camping. We hope to make it a yearly event, You have to take certian steps to make frienships last.. ill agree that just cause you play a game with someone doesent make them you friend. But when you expand outside of games, and actually get to know each other, i think thats when you can call them your friends. - KamikazeH20mln, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0@orphenshadow
I know the same feeling. My clan buddies from =DNC= (Deadly Night Crew) and I have known each other for over a year. We were the first 5 founding members and talk all the time over voice chat (TS specifically). We know almost everything about one another, and I would not hestiate in the slighest in helping any one of them out or having them sleep over. We all have each other's cells, which has come in useful in times you need to talk offline about personal issues or if one of the server's goes down. Hopefully we will all meet one day at QuakeCon (we live on east cost, midwest, and west coast respectively), but one of our guys lives all the way in Alaska:-)
Online relationships are just like real life relationships. Both require communication to keep going and keep up. Real life and online relationships take about the same amount of work to maintain, but online relationships are easier..you just have to get online. - buryme, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I mean, can you really trust another human being? No. The answer is you can not.
- FSFunky, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0What is love, Dave?
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0You mean, people are actually making 'friends' by playing online? Where? Please tell me. I gave up playing online over a year ago because it's simply no fun. How the hell can you make friends with an 8-year-old who just discovered gay jokes? Then, there's the "Oh, since I'm anonymous, I'll take this opportunity to throw racial slurs out whenever I get the chance, since no black people are around to beat me to a bloody pulp."
Who's making 'friends' with these people? - Fieri, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Not dugg for the hideous uses of the word "whom."
- Ferago, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I think online people can count as friends. I play an an online rpg, and I've been playing it with the same people for about 4 years. I talk to them all the time. Would I call them my friends? Definitely.I actually get along better with some of my online friends than I do with people I've known for a long time in RL.
- devwal, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0"i think it depends on ur age, i mean if ur like 30+ and have internet friends thats ok, but if ur some stupid preteen with most of his friends being online, thats pretty sad IMO"
congratulations on a meaningless post! - jumjum, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I went to an IRC meeting of a statewide community one time, and they seem to meet fairly regularly. Seems to be a good alternative for avoiding the usual dangers of traversing the veil from online to real life.
- gabangel, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0twisted never denied the importance of physically close friendships.
The fact of the matter is though, that you can't tell 100% for certain if people are being genuine ONLINE OR NOT. So to me, that's one of the most ridiculous arguments a person can make.
I've met two people who I knew online first, one for a year and one for seven years..and they were both exactly the same as I knew them to be. Of course I care about physically close friendships, because everyone needs that and you need to stay in touch with, for lack of a better phrase, "the physical" and sometimes people far away just can't provide the things that you need in a certain moment (lol...for example, like someone said... providing bail). But there are still only real people that use the internet, even if there are a lot who will act like ***** just because they can. All friendships are based on trust, which takes time no matter where your friend is.
It's very obvious that having some online friendships aren't for everybody (and I respect that), but just because it's not for you is no reason to judge or say that they aren't friends or that the person is a "loser" or some kind of social outcast..give me a break. You have no idea about them or how they portray themselves anywhere else. - SecretJolly, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I have met alot of people online, all have been through XBox Live. Even though I live hundres, even thousands of miles away, I still consider them good friends. What really helps is hearing voices, not just chatting away in some chat room. Hearing some one's voice really helps solidify a friendship. My .02.
- AudManFarva, on 10/12/2007, -1/+0I think anyone who actually read this whole article needs to get a life...
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