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261 Comments
- Firespray1138, on 01/06/2009, -2/+68Hoverboards, Syncords, and AT-ATs are all awesome.
- lintmonkey, on 01/06/2009, -1/+63"We're not even going to touch that time-traveling DeLorean — at least it's based on a real car — but Marty McFly's levitating skateboard passes into the realm of insanity."
It's easier to believe that a car can travel through time than it is to believe that a skateboard can levitate three inches off the ground? Really? - OhSnapVince, on 01/06/2009, -4/+60They're movies! Works of fiction! If you're going to complain about Project Genesis then why don't you say anything about how intergalactic space travel hasn't been developed and the Klingons aren't real? Jeez...
- inactive, on 01/06/2009, -0/+49The meteor was just government propaganda. Jesus, sometimes I feel like I'm the only one that understands starship troopers.
- mroberts, on 01/06/2009, -1/+50It's easier to believe that a car can travel through time than it is to believe that a DeLorean can make it up to 88 MPH.
- finalcloud33, on 01/06/2009, -1/+49I thought that finger print off of the bullet thing was absurd
- oboshoe, on 01/06/2009, -1/+44Don't be dissing AT-AT's now.
And the author doesn't seem to understand the concept of Deus ex Machina either. Even if the genesis device is a bit absurd, it was not an example Deus ex Machina. - carbonetc, on 01/06/2009, -10/+51A little glad to see Dark Knight in there. I love the Nolan Batmans, but the water vaporizer and the cell phone sonar tarnished them a little for me. Why inject gimmicky, absurd technologies into the storyline when you're attempting to make the most realistic superhero movies to date?
- borez, on 01/06/2009, -0/+36The Death Star
- Yoshiler, on 01/06/2009, -2/+36I'm glad I'm not the only one that thought AT-ATs were pointlessly awesome.
- SkippyDoorknob, on 01/06/2009, -1/+29It was an elegant weapon for a more civilized age.
- whiskeyclone, on 01/06/2009, -1/+28Denzel Washington - Deja Vu - Time Goggles.
Hummer powered Time Goggles. - divingfool, on 01/06/2009, -2/+29We need more AT-ATs!
- knifesideleft, on 01/06/2009, -0/+26I invented a laser gun that makes sound when fired in space.
- gwaggy12, on 01/06/2009, -0/+25What a terrible article! Most of these are indeed absurd, but the writer doesn't say why. The writer seems to assume all the readers already know enough about physics to debunk the sci-fi technologies.This article is the equivalent of saying, "That's stupid because it's stupid."
And, let's face it...IT'S SCI-FI! Ridiculous technology is the whole point.
This blog would get an F in grade school. - FearlessFreep, on 01/06/2009, -0/+25pointless? Yes
Awesome? Oh, YES - oboshoe, on 01/06/2009, -0/+22yea, but then you would be a "naked man with a light saber".
Would make for an entertaining episode of cops though. - jbittle, on 01/06/2009, -0/+22Let me sum up the article: These devices are dumb because they're dumb.
Great analysis - MMusick, on 01/06/2009, -0/+21I remember when Back to the Future II came out, all my friends and I wanted a Mattel Hoverboard so badly it hurt.
- shanealeslie, on 01/06/2009, -0/+21I'll trade you a shotgun that causes people to fly through the nearest plate glass window for one of those.
- SupaFlyTNT, on 01/06/2009, -1/+21While the batman thing is kinda out there in the movie i suppose; the way it worked is not how the article describes. And honestly, I dunno if it's because of seeing so many cracked.com articles or what; but one short sentence/paragraph without a deep/clever look into why it doesn't work is kinda weak. Buried.
- TSK05, on 01/06/2009, -3/+22"They call it "unobtainium" in the movie. It's still absurd, but OK. But it also somehow uses the heat to power the ship? C'mon, guys! "
Lame. Scientists use the word unobtainium as well: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unobtainium Also heat to power the ship? Uh well, yes, heat can be used to do work and to generate electricity - see a car. The engine does work (spins the wheels) and charges the battery - hence heat most certainly can power the ship. Movie was of course unrealistic but these are crap reasons. - TheMachine1, on 01/06/2009, -1/+19Most legit sci-fi device;
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orgasmatron - Atomic05, on 01/06/2009, -0/+17As a non-Jedi, I think I'd take the blaster. Then I'd hold up the guy giving out weapons and take the lightsaber anyway.
- CoD4, on 01/06/2009, -2/+18#1 should always be lightsaber
- boardthis, on 01/06/2009, -1/+17i know ill get burried for this but i never understood the point of the light saber. there were frickin laser guns all over the place but of course u can't create "high drama" with laser guns. it has to be a dual with laser swords instead.
- diggydougie, on 01/06/2009, -4/+191. Syncord: Yes, the eyeball thing is stupid. But if you could copy (on a molecular basis) the brain the memories are part of the package.
2. Hoverboard: We haven't cracked gravity yet. It is the weakest force so it stands to reason that once we figure out how to control it things like a hoverboard would be simple.
3. Cellphone tracker: IF you could get data from each phone you could do some amazing things. But yeah, they take it way too far.
4. Pumpkin bomb: Bombs the size of a pumpkin are certainly possible. I think they were going for the nuetron bomb type of weapon. You know "Kills people but leaves the buildings".
5 AT-AT: What always bothers me about these heavy machines in sci-fi is that they don't move fast. If it could move quick (like even construction equipment can) like an animal if wouldn't seem so silly. Imagine a metal elephant that shoots at you. That would be pretty hard to stop.
6. Genesis torpedo: Its supposed to just be a catalyst that causes a chain reaction which can't be stopped. If you could do that then it would be possible. But creating mass out of thin air is ridiculous.
7. Meteor gun: Yep, short range wepon only.
8.Virgil's Unobtainium Hull in The Core: Yep, I just don't see the possibility. But the concept of getting the energy from the heat is a no brainer. It could even be steam powered. - Procure, on 01/06/2009, -3/+18Because after all is said and done, the movie is a BATMAN movie. If you look at the history of Batman, you can see he relies on the best, newest, coolest gadgets to fight crime. In this day and age, they are far-advanced devices that seem impossible by today's standards.
- joegibes, on 01/06/2009, -0/+15The author even links to the wiki article! 5 bucks says he didn't read past the opening summary.
- Bogo, on 01/06/2009, -0/+15Awful writing - neither funny nor accurate. Buried.
- petebot, on 01/06/2009, -0/+14@Atomic5: You’re such a scoundrel.
- asgardshill, on 01/06/2009, -0/+14The transporter in ST was invented because Gene Roddenberry couldn't afford to depict shuttlecraft dropping off and picking up crewmembers every time they went on an away mission. He also couldn't show the Enterprise landing on a planet every week for the same reason - optics were muy expensive and showing the same thing week after week slowed down the action. The transporter was simply a plot device that should not be taken seriously by anyone.
- Akairenn, on 01/06/2009, -1/+15Drama, as you say.
That, and Lucas ripped off a Japanese film for the original Star Wars. Light sabers are so classic samurai it hurts.
Oh, and the major thing: a representation of feudalism. A sci-fi flick really can't have the peasants running about with laser spears. Laser swords are one thing; swords are awesome. Spears aren't so much. So, the peasants of Star Wars use blasters.
Meanwhile, you have the nobility - the Jedi, the Sith - running around with laser swords. Laser swords that can cut through anything and deflect blasts from laser guns, but laser swords nonetheless. And while our futuristic nobility has no problem with ganking the occasional stormtrooper or alliance serf, they remain primarily concerned with finding and beating the snot out of each other. Classic knight/samurai imagery. - drmangrum, on 01/06/2009, -2/+15/yawn
Bloggers can be so uptight and self-righteous sometimes. Honestly, just watch the movie. We all know the technology is absurd. It's the dreams of the absurd that creates innovation. - Qwert302, on 01/06/2009, -0/+12Let me attempt to critique this article in the style in which the article was written.
This article sucks because it is sucks.
Notice the complete lack of wit, humor, and good writing. - inactive, on 01/06/2009, -0/+12The Hitchhiker's Ring, the Point-of-view gun and the Infinite Improbability Drive.
Absurd but awesome. - korvan504521, on 01/06/2009, -2/+13The issue with the cell phones is that individual phones don't have direction sensing mics or speakers. If they did, the technology could absolutely work. All you'd need is for every phone to have the software to automatically build its own sonar image, and then upload it. You'd need overbuilt tower and infrastructure to handle the data stream, but once you got it, you could then compile it into a single system.
Using phones is what doesn't work though, if you instead just dropped sonar probes all over the city that ran on the cell network. . . that might work.
And what got me about the finger print off the bullet, was that it didn't help them at all. It gave them some vague info about the joker's background, that was never mentioned or used again. - Colecoman1982, on 01/06/2009, -0/+11Assuming you have the magically enhanced perception and reflexes to use the lightsaber to block incoming blaster shots then it would have a definite advantage over the blaster. Sure, a blaster has range but that doesn't mean much if the lightsaber wielder can block your shots while closing distance. On the other hand, a blaster can't (or, at least, isn't shown to be able to) block other blaster shots. So, for someone with the magic abilities to use it, a lightsaber would be a superior weapon. For a normal person, of course, you'd be more likely to accidentally cut your own head off.
- joegibes, on 01/06/2009, -0/+11"Some days you just can't get rid of a bomb!"
- 1807, on 01/06/2009, -0/+11"Don't bring a knife to a gun fight" is the saying, but if someone sat a light saber and a laser gun in front of me and said "choose your weapon" I'd choose a light saber.
- vertigo32, on 01/06/2009, -0/+11I always thought the Starship Troopers meteor was a pretty ***** idea all around. I understand the idea of a propoganda effect from the book, but in the movie they tried to make it a real thing by having Denise Richard's ship crash into it.
The only thing I didn't get is that if the ship is travelling at relativistic speeds, and the meteor is travelling at relativistic speeds in the opposite direction, you aren't really going to have time to try and avoid the meteor and the damage is going to be more than a glancing blow.
As for the other ones...AT-ATs were just awesome, the Dark Knight cell phone idea could theoretically work with ultra-high resolution mics / speakers in the phones (and a hell of a lot of processing power), and the hoverboard was just cool - and no more unrealistic than the unknown method the Back to the Future cars flew with.
I would say the Denzel Washington Time Goggles were definitely up on the list...especially towards the end when he somehow climbed into it and fell back in time. - inactive, on 01/06/2009, -0/+11how about space ships which make a huge rumbling sound in space as they go by.
- inactive, on 01/06/2009, -0/+10I'm still not willing to trade my grenades that explode and cause enemy soldiers to jump into the air like they're jumping on trampolines.
- petebot, on 01/06/2009, -1/+11Yo, doc, you better back up. I don’t think you have enough road to get to 88.
- TSK05, on 01/06/2009, -0/+9Well, you could tow a planet if you had an engine powerful enough. Travel in time....yeah... Dugg for doctor who.
- oboshoe, on 01/06/2009, -1/+10Actually the physics are just almost impossible.
Two big problems
1) It would take more energy for one transport, than has been produced by our sun during its entire lifetime.
2) The Heisenberg uncertainty principle.
If they can find a way to generate cheap, affordable renewable energy in amounts that would make our sun look like a matchbook, and you wouldn't mind just being "a little bit different" after each transport, then a transporter is possible someday.
Lets check back in 10,000 years. - aargh01, on 01/06/2009, -0/+9I didn't mind the sonar as much as the water vaporizer. Why didn't it blow up everybody around it, too, since people are made of mostly water? Is the only defense against it skin?
- MikeyToo, on 01/06/2009, -1/+10Wait... Klingons aren't real?
*slips into depression* - Hellothere123, on 01/06/2009, -2/+11At the core.
- inactive, on 01/06/2009, -0/+9and:
S.E.P or 'Somebody Else's Problem field'
"peril sensitive sunglasses"
and "bistromathics" -
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