Spanish swine fever grips nation

zipinotes.com — As outbreaks of fast-food meat'normity threaten to drain national bacon supplies [citation needed], the USDA finally lifts its ban on importing jamón ibérico, a breathtakingly expensive cured ham that's the Spanish equivalent of Kobe beef. The pork's poised to hit shelves in July '08, sending the nation's foodies into drooling paroxysms of glee.