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266 Comments
- inactive, on 12/29/2008, -4/+110man whats the deal with people here hating on buffets? getting stoned and taking a trip around the corner to the chinese buffet is a time honored tradition around here. and what, you guys dont like cicis either? whats wrong with you people?
- asskicker32, on 12/29/2008, -0/+87Pro Tip: If you take all the fried shrimp, they will replace it by the time youre finished eating it.
- doublefelix, on 12/29/2008, -0/+72Bonus Tip: That sneeze guard is there for a reason.
- madeingermany, on 12/29/2008, -1/+62What I don't understand is why people put so much on one plate.
You can take your time and go multiple times, without putting the Prime Rib on the Apple Crumble. - harrythe3rd, on 12/29/2008, -8/+62smoke weed
- cubicledrone, on 12/29/2008, -0/+52"That man ate all our shrimp! And two plastic lobsters!"
"Tis no man. Tis a remorseless eating machine." - emmahlav, on 12/29/2008, -1/+51Chinese buffets are the best.
- mark076h, on 12/29/2008, -4/+51Four plates is easy
- mark076h, on 12/29/2008, -10/+53Old Country Buffet FTW!
- GregLoire, on 12/29/2008, -1/+44I've discovered that I can eat more at a buffet if I physically lean back in my chair while downing the last plate (though this makes the walk to the car a little extra painful).
My girlfriend was present for the discovery of this technique, and I don't think I've ever seen her so disgusted. - xxMorrissey, on 12/29/2008, -10/+52Who eats that much food? Americans.
- inactive, on 12/29/2008, -0/+40After all those ***** articles about how to eat healthy on Digg's front page, it's about time we got an eating tutorial that's actually USEFUL.
- getoffmybridge, on 05/05/2009, -0/+35Do you have any idea how embarrassing it is to be kicked out of a buffet for eating too much, you insensitive prick?
- shutaro, on 12/29/2008, -13/+43OM NOM NOM!
- BoneStamp, on 12/29/2008, -4/+31The best part about a buffet is making your perfect salad and sundae.
- UNL1M1T3D, on 12/29/2008, -0/+27A to go box is preferred. I am an American and I rarely eat everything and always try and take something to go.
- KSUdesigner, on 12/29/2008, -5/+30You get a hassle because you aren't supposed to send back the leftovers. Eat them or throw them away, we don't serve your leftovers to other people in the states.
- UNL1M1T3D, on 12/29/2008, -2/+27Did he die of a heart attack?
- Demener, on 12/29/2008, -4/+28Go to better buffets then.
- getoffmybridge, on 05/05/2009, -0/+24Because who the ***** wants to get up?
- fant0m, on 12/29/2008, -0/+22Everyday
- inactive, on 12/29/2008, -5/+26They should have poor African children living inside American buffet trash cans. Win-win situation.
- inactive, on 12/29/2008, -5/+26kyle, stop being a girl and stfu.
- inactive, on 12/29/2008, -0/+21even better!
- inactive, on 12/29/2008, -2/+21I don't think MrBabyMan needs to be eating buffet style
- mark076h, on 12/29/2008, -0/+18MGM Grand Buffet!
- spaceman84, on 12/29/2008, -2/+20Don't drink anything until the end. Beverages are cheap and they'll try to get you to fill up on 'em. Drinks also weigh down the food you've already eaten, which makes you feel full. Drink at the end.
- cafeolee, on 12/29/2008, -4/+22"Who eats that much food? Americans."
Oh wow, very clever, sir. All Americans are fat and all other people are skinny. Want to spout off any more dumbass stereotypes now? - Gunbard, on 12/29/2008, -0/+17It's called laziness. The more food on your plate, the less time you have to spend getting up and going through the buffet line, which means more OM NOM NOM.
- inactive, on 12/29/2008, -1/+18so based on a trip to one particular resuraunt you assume all buffets are bad? wtf?
- jinnykoru, on 12/29/2008, -0/+16I can eat four plates. :]
I just don't look like I do.
Easy. - BradBrown, on 12/29/2008, -0/+16Tip #834: Bread contains air pockets. To conserve valuable stomach space, crush your bread into little dough-like balls before consuming. This also works on biscuits and rolls as well.
- korvan504521, on 12/29/2008, -24/+40A buffet is not a reason to eat yourself sick. I hate buffets, not because of the food, but because the walking tubs of lard eating more than a small Ethiopian town disgust me.
- inigomntoya, on 12/29/2008, -0/+15Communists? You mean like Chinese people?
- bongfarmer, on 12/29/2008, -0/+15lots of restaurants and grocery stores add bleach to their discards to stop dumpster divers
- inactive, on 12/30/2008, -3/+18Most diggers are what are reffered to by common society as 'douchebags'
- riptor666, on 12/29/2008, -0/+15I just get 4 plates of full meat and pasta or rice. Then finish off with a dessert plate and then proceed to taking a huge *****. Eat the meat you beat the house, everything else is absolutely cheap and worthless.
- slvrbullet87, on 12/29/2008, -1/+16Better me eat it than some warlord in africa use it to gain more power
- CoD4, on 12/29/2008, -1/+16your name isn't jonathan phelps, is it?
- rhedrick, on 12/29/2008, -9/+24Buried because this guy is the #1 digger...and it's lame.
- mark076h, on 12/29/2008, -1/+16who doesn't?
- Hillsfar, on 12/29/2008, -0/+15Sheesh! Don't send it back. Just get a "to go" box and your next meal is free.
- chesterjosiah, on 12/29/2008, -3/+17I agree with BoneStamp. My younger bro perfected the ham-chunks-and-cheese-and-lettuce-and-bacon-bits salad (with fat free Italian dressing). And he always followed it up with the chocolate-and-vanilla-swirl ice cream in a small brown plastic bowl spiraled 8 inches high topped with rainbow sprinkles, Oreos, nuts, and sometimes a little bit of chocolate syrup.
I miss my brother. - Frixionburne, on 12/29/2008, -0/+14epic reading fail
- dstruktNine, on 12/29/2008, -0/+13Anyone else get a little hungry after reading that? Now I wanna hit up my Japanese buffet with unlimited sashimi!
::drool:: - shutaro, on 12/29/2008, -12/+25*You* disgust me.
- jhandfield, on 12/29/2008, -3/+16What buffet do you go to where they hold a gun to your head until you've eaten too much?
- adikt, on 12/29/2008, -0/+12When I was in college and very poor I had the method of acquiring food for take home from the local Chinese buffet down to a science. (They charged $4.00 / lb for take-out)
1. Get an oversized jacket (winter jackets were better but windbreakers worked as well.)
2. Staple 6-8 one quart sized Zip-Loc bags to the interior of your jacket.
3. Get seated in the back of the restaurant, away from the hostess and the kitchen (face the wall if possible)
4. For every piece of food you put in your mouth, put two in the bag.
5. Separate the types of food by bag (this way if you have people over later or the next day, you have selections for your guests.
6. Make sure you have either fresh, unused Zip-Loc bags or plastic containers in your car so you don't have to drive home with the food inside your jacket.
This method works best when eating out with a friend who can go get the food from the buffet. It gets awkward getting up from the table and going to the buffet to get more food with you have 12 lbs of food weighing down your jacket.
Enjoy! - credential101, on 12/29/2008, -5/+17No wonder MrBabyMan is fat...he loves his Chinese buffets.
- ryancawdor, on 12/29/2008, -0/+12The consequences of the 4th plate:
http://www.thewvsr.com/ryans.htm
(I don't know who's site this is; it's indicative of how pervasive this story is that I could find it by googling "ryan's" and "macaroni").
Old, corny, and so full of hyperbole it's embarrasing, but goddamit, still funny. -
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